Tracey:
She is a
friend of a friend that was interested in me. I was at a happy hour once and she invited me to come to her place for drinks. She says she invited our mutual friend, but that friend declined so it is just me and her. I get there and we drink and smoke and watch tv. Didn't get any signals to make a move really and then she had me sleep on the couch when she went to bed. I was already on the fence about sleeping with her, but the fact that she invited me over and then didn't give any signs that she wanted to have sex was pretty much the nail in the coffin for her. I woke up in the morning and snuck out before she woke up.
Bumped into her in the neighborhood once and she was friendly but rushed away like she had to be somewhere important lol.
Jai:
I went to a dance party on Wednesday and saw Jai with two female friends. Eventually the two friends went on the dancefloor and I approached Jai when she was sitting alone. We started talking with her and found out more about her in 20 minute conversation than most people probably learn in a handful of dates. I say this not to brag but to remind people that a lot of the day-to-day stuff that people talk about on dates is irrelevant and doesn't not give you an idea of who someone is or the best way to figure out where they are coming from. We talked about how she is a virgin but she thinks about sex a lot.
Theresa was the same way and I ended up taking her virginity. To be honest, I am unsure if I want to take Jai's V-Card or not... I really don't see it as a badge of honor or anything because I am pretty amoral when it comes to sex.
Anyways, my convo with Jai also touched on other things that helped me understand her such as the issues that she has with her family, what she can work on in future relationships, etc. My female friend, Monica came in and jumped into our conversation eventually. Kind of a c0ckblock move imo but it could be because my female friend might be developing a crush on me. For my ego, this would be a good development because my female friend is attractive, but outside of that, it would be a nightmare because my female friend is not someone I would date. She just sees the world differently than I do and I don't think we have a lot in common as a result.
But yeah, back to Jai. We scheduled another date for Friday and met up for drinks. Good conversation again. Monica texted me to see where I was, and when I told her, she came and brought a date with her, so suddenly we were on a double date. Monica and her date pull up chairs next to me and Jai. Normally I would have just had a conversation with Jai, Monica, and Monica's date, but I think that Monica was kinda pushing things by inviting herself to hang out while I am on a date and also, the fact that Monica is attractive and keeps popping up wherever I am could make things weird for Jai.
As a result, I basically ignored Monica and talked to Jai as if Monica wasn't there. Monica and her date eventually leave after about 45 mins of this. Jai and I talk until about 1 am and then head out. No chance of anything with Jai this time, but the next time we hang out, I will make the conversation more sexual and see what happens.
As for Monica, she also tried to intertwine her arm with mines at one point in the night which I subtly undid as I was talking. I know this sounds like Monica is super into me and everything, but I think one alternative option is that Monica wants attention from me when I am around other women. Just wanting some validation is no big deal because sometimes I seek validation from people I have no interest in romantically so I can understand that. If, one the other hand, she is catching feelings for me, then things can get a bit messy because I already know we aren't compatible so anything more than no-strings attached sex will end in disaster.
Connie:
Hadn't really hung out with her
since this post because she turned a little too clingy and we are not compatible when it comes to personality. About two months ago she texted me at like 12am and I perceived it as a booty call. She did not and said that we had already tried to go down that path and we didn't need to do it again. Since we weren't compatible, I only perceived it as sex anyways so I didn't sweat it and didn't reinitiate after the convo ended.
About two weeks ago, she texted me inviting me out for drinks with her and her female friends. I declined but told her to hit me up after if she was interested. We were scheduled to go for drinks but by the time she came to my neighborhood, the bar was closed, so we went to my place and had a netflix and chill night which ended in fvcking.
She has been texting me more often and tried to guilt me into inviting her to hang out for the holidays. I told her no and that I don't hang out with women over the holidays because it gives ppl the wrong impression. I will give her a pass for now, but any further red flags and I am going to let her go.
Nicki
Went to an event last night and was sitting at the bar. I saw Nicki when she walked in and she made eye contact and smiled. She looked to be older (mid 30s?) but she looked cute. She walked by later and smiled again. Later on, I saw her sitting by herself and approached.
macallik: Hey... my mom said never to let a cute girl sit at a party and check her Instagram feed by herself
Nicki: Haha
macallik: haha let me take that back, I don't want to start the interaction with a lie or anything. My name is macallik *extends hand*
But yeah, talked for a good 15 minutes, made her laugh and then got her number. She is an Interior designer from the North Side of Chicago. Looking back, I feel like if I wanted to, I could've talked to her longer and insta-dated to somewhere quieter, but
a) there were a lot of prospects there and
b) the idea of insta-dating didn't even cross my mind during the interaction, so I thanked her for the conversation and left. I sent her a text and she responded, and then about 20 mins later I responded to her text and she had already left the party. I will give her a call later this week and try to set a date up. The conversation and attraction was there but it was average compared to some of the other women in my life so if things become difficult or seem 'off', I will let her fall to the wayside.
Callie:
We
met her at a party a few months ago. She was in love with someone else, but didn't want to hang out with me unless I was interested in a relationship. I am not interested in a relationship and conveyed that to her but I didn't stop texting to hang out with her. I tried to set something up for the 2-3 weeks after the party, but she would flake or not respond to text messages. It stopped being worth the effort so I sent a text essentially saying something to the effect of:
Text Message said:
I am not sure if it is bad timing or something but it has been pretty hard to talk to you. No hard feelings but I'll keep your number in my back pocket and if we cross paths again we can try this again.
Callie responding with a text making a comment about me giving up on her. I didn't respond to it.
About 3 weeks later, Callie hits me up out of the blue and sets up a date for us to hang out. The date was going well but Callie caught be talking about my plans for the weekend and realized that I was hanging out with another woman. I try not to talk about other women and if I am dating around when I am on a date, but she asked and so I told her. Things kinda went south from there. She didn't storm out of the bar or anything dramatic, but all of a sudden she had a curfew and had to be home at reasonable hour so she could get up early in the morning. It's ironic that she is such a staunch supporter of monogamous sex but also told me about threesomes she had. Ah well, win some lose some.
Haven't talked to her since that date.
Janisse:
I
met Janisse the same time I bumped into Callie a few months ago. She also stopped responding to text messages and so I sent the same text to her as I did Callie. Janisse didn't even respond to the text though lol.
She was at the party where I met Nicki. I looked at her but didn't have my glasses on and didn't realize it was her. She actually sought me out and said hello and for the life of me I couldn't recall her name. To her it probably seemed as if I saw her and then purposefully acted like I didn't remember her when she approached though lol. Anyways, her approach caught me off guard so I kept the conversation short and then ejected. I re-engaged later on in the night but Janisse didn't seem too receptive. I will shoot her a text later this week saying it was good to see her and whether she wants to try hanging out again or not. I think there is a chance she is a lesbian and I am barking up the wrong tree, but makes sense to play until I hear the whistle I suppose.
Plates:
Without going into too much detail, I have a few plates that have been in my life for an extended period of time. Out of respect for my plates and the length of our relationship, I don't really write about them publicly anymore but things are going well in those relationships as well.