Why online and app dating simply doesn’t work

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

If you have your looks and pictures in order, OLD is child's play. Like taking candy from a baby. I have 5 dates lines up this weekend; double and triple-booked, one 7, three 8s, and one 9. I do the Guru operandi, of booking at the same time and place, and if all show, well hell, surely one girl will be disappointed getting the boot

It's all what your pics represent. I have one pic with a three-piece Italian suit tailor-fitted to the bone, another pic on the beach ripped to shreds in my Boss shorts, and the last pic at my office sitting down on a L-shaped mahogany desk with cherry-wood flooring in a Zegna two-piece. I go on these dates, and let these chicks game me. It's quite liberating to be the object to be competed for, especially when your entourage is an assortment of different cultured beautiful women. I date mostly Europeans, as I find the ratio of quality/attractiveness highest in this group.

You have a choice: maximize your SMV and presentation and have the best women chase you after the meet--or--chase them. I choose to focus on my most prized asset--ME, and leave the chase game to be their concern.

 

[bigneil]

I'm not photogenic. My photos rate about 6. And women won't date guys more than 10 years older online usually. But I've dated the most gorgeous women, 10-20 years my junior, all of whom I met in person, for 30 years. Thus, online dating never worked for me.

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Bigneil, we're close in age. I use a professional photographer, snap a few hundred pics, suited up like a Wall Street exec, and choose the best handful. Then alter for best lighting. I'm 6'2 195, 12% bf. I've worked out all my life. My target group is in the 24-34 age bracket. I understate my age between 3-6 years depending on the age group I'm targeting. If you are looking for a 20-year gap, OLD is going to be difficult as you get screened out by age criteria (unless you seriously understate), but 10-15 years, no problem.

 

[Bingo-Player]

what is OLD ? im not familiar with that one

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Online dating

 

[bigneil]

On Line Desperation is more accurate. If you are good with women, you will meet women everywhere and won't need to go online. Women especially don't need to go online. You'll NEVER get a girl 10+ years younger online, unless it's sugardaddy.com.

OLD is getting old.

 

[backseatjuan]

This led me to heavily using apps like tinder and social media such as Facebook / snapchat in an attempt to meet some

Wonderful uphill on your part. In 2017 use youtube comments to meet women. Dude, there are dating sites out there, where people come to meet other people, try it.

 

[bigneil]

But if you're good with women, why not use it? Why exclude online dating sites?

I'm not sure what it is, but I must not be photogenic. In person I can pick up gorgeous 20 year old women. Online I'm lucky if their 42 year old mom will reply.

My last 2 online dates were in 2006 and 2011. I lived in Orlando for one, and West Palm Beach for the other (having lived in Texas in the meantime). Ironically both dates were in Melbourne - and turned out to be the same girl!

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

The whole premise of OLD is unappealing for some. Having to project a persona, present the best pics of yourself etc comes across to some as a bit 'advertisy'. And then going on-line and scrolling through pic after pic of women with poor puppy dog eyes saying 'pick me!' just gets sad. It is all just too consumerist and fake. And then I think it's this very inability for some to connect with the on-line world in that way which makes them perform well in the real world. You are just being your normal nonchalant unstressed self... and say 'hey how's it going' with a grin. Bang, instant connection.

 

[El Payaso]

In my opinion this same exact principle applies to "real world" dating venues.

True but OLD is a lot more superficial and reliant on looks.

 

[BetterCallSaul]

Wonderful uphill on your part. In 2017 use youtube comments to meet women. Dude, there are dating sites out there, where people come to meet other people, try it.

Use Youtube comments to meet women? That's a new one for me. How the hell does that even work?

 

[Building_and_Loan]

Banged two girls off Tinder and Bumble since i joined. Honestly though one of my new year's resolutions is to phase out out altogether eventually.

It's good to have as an option, but for average looking guys like me, you have to invest a little more time into it than other better looking guys. I've also found out there is a hell of a lot of fake advertising going on on those sites. Lots of girls put up pictures that were clearly 30-40 pounds ago, or only have pictures of them with their hotter friends. Can't stand that.

 

[BeTheChange]

how would you and @BeTheChange rate yourself in looks?

Honestly probably an 8 in the face and at least a 9 in the body - aesthetics wise I'm at fitness trainer physique minus size. My tinder profile is a topless shot taken by a friend and insta filtered to make it look artsy.

I also display the company I work for on my profile.

The only thing I lack is height (5'9) but still taller than most women and don't tend to go for girls at or above my height.

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

You'll NEVER get a girl 10+ years younger online, unless it's sugardaddy.com.

I can assure you this is not correct. I am in my early 40s, and date girls from OLD in the 24-34 range. The mode age 27-29 yos.

OLD is looks driven. Some girls will filter you out by age, but others won't. If you look great for your age, you will do fine with younger girls from OLD.

 

[bigneil]

Ok, but if you are that good looking you can pick up women in person.

I'm only about a 6 in photo looks, but for the last 5 years I've been able to seduce the hottest women I meet in person, so of course I go to strip clubs. My magic powers are lost online.

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Ok, but if you are that good looking you can pick up women in person

Correct. This is not an argument of which is better. When I am out socially with business associates/friends, I meet hot women as well, but I don't go out that often (without women) to schedule double- and triple-headers. Therefore, when I'm at my office (12-14 hour workdays), I go online, grab a few numbers and schedule dates.

My last gf was a beautiful model who i approached in a venue. So certainly, open approaches have much merit too.

I'm only about a 6 in looks, but for the last 5 years I've been able to seduce the hottest women I meet in person, so of course I go to strip clubs. My magic powers are lost online.

In the context of OLD: At a 6, it's hard to pull. A 7 will pull 6s and 7s. An 8 will pull 8s, 7s, 6s. A 9 will pull most. The good news about SMV, is YOU can direct it, and certainly increase to 8-9 with work and correct presentation.

BUT, if you are able to seduce 8s and 9s in person as a 6, then open approach is your game, and you are doing well. Keep doing what works for you.

 

[Roober]

Agreed with most here that pics make a big difference. I have been meaning to ask my cousin about taking some photos for me, just not sure of the best scene. I just can't ever get the right angles...

I agree that every man can be an 8 at least with proper grooming, clothing, physique and attitude. I would say I am a 6 on average, but when I wear my tailored suit, sleep well, fresh cut hair, and 1 day old shave, I would say I could be an 8.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Regards the OP, I would say it is largely a waste of time. But it is only so because guys place too much value on it; I can see some blokes are clearly using it as a sole source of contact with women. That being said, I know some women who use it as a single source as well.

The thing I've found is to treat it causally, something to pass the time while I take a dump. We should treat it the same as walking in to a room full of women IRL; that being, a ten percent rule - we might actually have genuine mutual desire with one in ten, if that.

Much against my better judgement, I rejoined OKC in the new year and have probably only had one decent conversation since then. There are also dozens of catfish.

All the same, it's a good source of easy 6's if that's your thing.

There is a method to approaching online, I think. Go online Thursday or Friday afternoon and be ready to take a girl out that evening, with a plan of something you're going to do that night anyway. Search for chicks also online, then just start inviting women along with your plan; spontaneous, cutting right to the chase, with no wishy-washy chatting online BS.

I think this will seriously shorten the odds and am going to try it.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Ok, but if you are that good looking you can pick up women in person.

I'm only about a 6 in photo looks, but for the last 5 years I've been able to seduce the hottest women I meet in person, so of course I go to strip clubs. My magic powers are lost online.

bigneil, as a comfort, there are many of us who just don't take good pictures. Taking good pictures is about the posing, and being able to conjure up an attitude, etc. But we may look way better in person, and it's usually a good thing.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

bigneil, as a comfort, there are many of us who just don't take good pictures. Taking good pictures is about the posing, and being able to conjure up an attitude, etc. But we may look way better in person, and it's usually a good thing.

The most effective pic I've ever taken for OLD was a selfie in the mirror where I hold my arms over my head slightly bent wearing a tight Tshirt and a backwards hat with my biceps/triceps just busting out through he sleeves...

Have gotten so many "Oh my God your muscles are huge!" Compliments and have noticed a dramatic uptick in women messaging me first. Muscles and something related to being a bad boy(tattoos, backwards hat, smirk, etc) will get results as a pic.