B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
Girls are gross. That's why you don't acknowledge them
Alpha males are natural born leaders, u don't try to be an alpha males, they were chased by womens since millenia for just by being themselves, they are only 10% of them in entire world but face much more extinction nawadays, but u can you can learn to be masculine, their traits, set rules on relationship etc etc@Focal core so im on my way to becoming a true alpha lol?
That whole "alpha male" thing is bullsh1t. Yeah go to the gym, be a leader, set the rules and women will come to you. One, that doesn't always work for everybody like it doesn't work for people who are disadvantaged in some way. Two, who cares about women.Alpha males are natural born leaders, u don't try to be an alpha males, they were chased by womens since millenia for just by being themselves, they are only 10% of them in entire world but face much more extinction nawadays, but u can you can learn to be masculine, their traits, set rules on relationship etc etc
The things is they're always a leader without being a leader, that's where most guys fails, didn't understand the concept, why most of them fails to keep their frame.. No not everyone buddy.When you're being near one, don't ever think that you're in control, he is..not even the most alpha female will run over him.That whole "alpha male" thing is bullsh1t. Yeah go to the gym, be a leader, set the rules and women will come to you. One, that doesn't always work for everybody like it doesn't work for people who are disadvantaged in some way. Two, who cares about women.
If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.
Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.
This will quickly drive all women away from you.
And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.
Found myself agreeing with Spaz for once, lol.It's a family gathering
The responses here is shocking !!
It’s only work if you view seduction as a chore. Personally I enjoy the game of bedding women.Understood.
Back to your question...
I agree with Mr. Goodstuff, but I will add one other possible angle...
Sometimes, in a twisted sort of way, it is a lot of fun to ignore women and only talk to guys. Can we call it "reverse-attention-whoring?" Or maybe "ignoring-whoring*" lol?
Additionally, with guys, you can (usually) let your guard down and just be yourself. Typically, talking to women is WORK, and talking to guys is easy/chill. Not sure how else to say it.
*Extroverts sometimes attention-*****. Us introverts sometimes ignore-***** lol.
Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
This is only so because you make it so. You can do the exact same thing with women, put zero extra effort into it and let your guard down. If anything (most) women will appreciate a chilled out dude rather than the typical tense guy who's working hard on what to say next.Additionally, with guys, you can (usually) let your guard down and just be yourself. Typically, talking to women is WORK, and talking to guys is easy/chill. Not sure how else to say it.
Understood. Women absolutely like a chill guy. I can be chill around guys and certain women I already know well. But for new women, I’m not there yet; I still get rather tense. That’s an area I have to work on.This is only so because you make it so. You can do the exact same thing with women, put zero extra effort into it and let your guard down. If anything (most) women will appreciate a chilled out dude rather than the typical tense guy who's working hard on what to say next.
Same thing happened on Good Friday service. There were a bunch of females next to me, but when it came to shaking hands as is normally done during the service, I didn't feel I got much of a "choosing" signal from the girl sitting next to me. I ignored her the rest of the time but acknowledged everyone else. While this sounds low in this context, I think it's the same principle with the other OP. You just feel like an inner rage that's manifest by ignoring them despite the fact that it could be a "sister-in-the Lord", which comes like a quasi-family, and could be a construed as quasi-family event, so the variables are similar to the OP. You can't help once that rage takes over that, well, you are not chosen by them that way and you can see it by their non-verbal cues/rejection, etc...I went to a family gathering last night. Where there was lots of females. For some.reason i only said hello and goodbye to the males. I never aknowledged a female there. Its like i didnt even want to notice them unless there was a romantic prospect there etc: whats the underlying cause of this?
At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
This has to do with outcome dependence. You don't desire to take a guy to bed, but talking to a woman you imagine there's more of a risk. There is not, if you don't win you don't technically lose because you haven't really lost anything, you just didn't gain what you desired. Getting tensed up by talking to new women isn't rational, there's no good reason to react that way.Understood. Women absolutely like a chill guy. I can be chill around guys and certain women I already know well. But for new women, I’m not there yet; I still get rather tense. That’s an area I have to work on.
Gonna try affirmations along with more exposure.
That is unfair. Most of what guys such as Mike32ct and myself want is to just have a nice interaction. Even Bigdave17 was happy to get 30 min in with a decent girl of a good convo.This has to do with outcome dependence. You don't desire to take a guy to bed, but talking to a woman you imagine there's more of a risk.
A nice convo or even civil interaction is a baseline. If you don't get a baseline result then it does feel like a loss because you can't even add any value, even in the form of convo, because you are not hot enough for her and get shot down before you even get a chance to try. We are very realistic about managing our expectations and I can assure you that getting tensed up with a girl has absolutely nothing to do with outcome dependency such as getting her to bed (or marrying her if you are Christian). The nerves itself can only be worked through by the use of pheromones (i.e. in my experience) and that's a chemical based intervention that has to do with the part of the brain dealing with smell. Maybe smelling and nervousness are related.Grewd said:There is not, if you don't win you don't technically lose because you haven't really lost anything, you just didn't gain what you desired. Getting tensed up by talking to new women isn't rational, there's no good reason to react that way.
You can't reason with tension anymore than you can reason pain to go away. You can't enjoy interactions independent of the outcome if you feel bad in the interaction itself.Grewd said:If it helps, keep in the back of your mind that getting tense will increase the chance if it going the way you fear it will go. Remind yourself that they're just humans with their own flaws just like yourself. Don't depend such interactions on a desired outcome, find a way to enjoy it regardless of the outcome.
Same thing can happen by trying to talk to a man, he might not want to talk to you. Somehow it just doesn't matter as much in that case... It is not a loss, nothing is lost. You can't lose what you haven't gained.A nice convo or even civil interaction is a baseline. If you don't get a baseline result then it does feel like a loss because you can't even add any value, even in the form of convo, because you are not hot enough for her and get shot down before you even get a chance to try.
What is it then? What is it that makes the difference? I'm not seeing it.We are very realistic about managing our expectations and I can assure you that getting tensed up with a girl has absolutely nothing to do with outcome dependency such as getting her to bed (or marrying her if you are Christian).
This is absurd to me. Like the type of thing that has a psychological effect by merely believing it even if partially.The nerves itself can only be worked through by the use of pheromones (i.e. in my experience) and that's a chemical based intervention that has to do with the part of the brain dealing with smell. Maybe smelling and nervousness are related.
Those are two very different types of feelings. Tension has a psychological cause even though it has physiological symptoms. Pain has a physiological cause, it's a signal from the body to the mind and not the other way around so you can't just reason it away.You can't reason with tension anymore than you can reason pain to go away. You can't enjoy interactions independent of the outcome if you feel bad in the interaction itself.
Come on. An ego-hit or a social fail is a loss...or "awkward". With a guy there is no ego-hit or social fail because there is nothing about that interaction that makes you feel good or bad about your SMV/LMS or your ability to generate romantic prospects. I didn't think I'd need to spell that out here, but of course there is a difference between a guy and a gal. However, not all girls have that type of effect. I can think of a few girls, off the top of my head, who I'm not romantically attracted to, that do not elicit much in my mind any more than a guy would.Same thing can happen by trying to talk to a man, he might not want to talk to you. Somehow it just doesn't matter as much in that case... It is not a loss, nothing is lost. You can't lose what you haven't gained.
An involuntary nerve reflect. Perhaps something is activating the fight and fear response of the brain that I'm not entirely in control of and as a result some type of tense-up occurs. This is commonly known as approach anxiety and I've seen PUA tutorials explain this could be a hardwired response from the caveman days. If it's a hardwired response that requires a hardwired solution then technically it's physiological rather than psychological. Even if we agree to disagree, at least it's borderline between the two and if anything can alter the physiological component of it, then the psychological component would be allot easier to handle.Grewd said:What is it then? What is it that makes the difference? I'm not seeing it.
Please do research on Lavinder essential oil and see how that smell of that flower could be a relaxant and work even better than a sleeping pill minus the side effects from reviews studied. This provides at least one example of the link between smell and a hardwired biological response. How can you rule out other potential hardwire short-cuts via smell if this works?Grewd said:This is absurd to me. Like the type of thing that has a psychological effect by merely believing it even if partially.
The Amygdala is physiological because it is part of the brain. Certain smells like Lavinder disables it or calms that part down. Again, pheromones could chemically have similar effects, in particular social pheromones. There is no mad science with social pheromones because the actual name of the compound that I have in mind is called Beta-Androstenol. I believe I tried a compound like this in the past and it was very effective in calming the nerves around women. Also other social pheromones are good to but you have to do your own legwork. You can only change the frame if the Amygdala is not all over the place. But again these are short-cuts. You have PUAs like Mystery Method that suggest 1000 approaches are needed to get good at wearing down the approach anxiety. But this is advice from over a decade ago and not sure how that would fare in today's high-tech world of smartphones and 5G internet.Grewd said:Those are two very different types of feelings. Tension has a psychological cause even though it has physiological symptoms. Pain has a physiological cause, it's a signal from the body to the mind and not the other way around so you can't just reason it away.
You can change how you feel about interactions by changing how you frame such interactions.