who in the world came up with the bright idea of Monogamy?

[backbreaker]

AT least to me, being monogamous is one of the most un natural things you can do.

I hate to use the example, but alot of animals do not practice monogamy.

Not too long ago, we didn't either. Hell, some places still don't.

why should I try to fight something that I naturally want to do so damn bad?

I mean, if you take a step back, is it really a BAD thing to say "I love you karen... but I also love Stacy as well"? If you have two kids, are you going to have a scarlet letter because you only love one of them? That's not necessarly a straight comparsion, but you get the jist of where I am going.

 

[Shiftkey]

I can think of two reasons.
1) It's the most efficient way to procreate.
2) Humans are naturally jealous and possessive.

 

[backbreaker]

1. Is it?

That's like saying the most efficent way to get fat is to eat 1 cheeseburger per meal instead of 4.

If I am ****ing 2 women, assuming both are both able to bear kids, and I am not sterile, my odds DOUBLE in being able to procreate. Hell, I can have two kids at the same time (Trust me)

2. Has a little more validity but not by much. Humans are only jealous of things they cannot obtain.

If I saw you driving a new Geo Metro down the street (no offense to anyone who is driving one), I am not going to get jealous because you posses this car I have.

Needless to say, If I am man enough to wear more than one woman likes me, to the point where they will openly live with and compete for my time, you think I honeslty give a damn if one leaves? And the women wouldn't be jealous becuase a) there is an understanding, they you the man belong to these women, or visa versa (just like I don't get mad when I know a woman is getting ****ed by a guy that's not me) and b) they do have you.. just not all the time

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

You proably come from a broken family and do not understand the joys of unconditional(almost) love. If you want children marriage is the safest, smartest, and most productive manner to raise a child.

Marriage and morality prevents most of the woes that our society faces, and this is extremely true for minorities. John McWhorter has done alot of writing on this.

 

[The Truth]

It depends what makes you happy. For me monogamy works. It makes me and my girlfriend happy. Basically my girlfriend satisfies me enough that i don't need another woman and I think and hope that she feels the same about me.

Sadly that can't be said for everyone, like yourself.

 

[PRMoon]

I can think of two reasons.
1) It's the most efficient way to procreate.
2) Humans are naturally jealous and possessive.

1) Not really but it's certainly the safest smartest way. Why can't we have more then one wife or spouse per male? Look at those foolish mormans with big familys and the problems they have and all the awnsers should be fairly apparent. In order for a single men to have multiple wives in society means that other single men have to be booted from said society. This is what happens in that form of mormanisim, they make up a bunk rule that young boys/men may or may not have violated and *Bam* ostrosized from the community never to return. And really that's the only way it will work because even if it was 33% male births to 66% women you'd still have trouble getting every man to have more then 1 or 2 wives. It should go without saying that the children/people raised in this setting have questionable values and ethics at best.

2) It's not only that we're jealous and possessive it's just that we are human to begin with. We live in a complex highly evolved (incomparison to our animal counter parts) with what has to be the most complex and diverse mating rituals on the planet. We define our emotions (love, hate, fear, anxiety) and look to them to guide us throughout our lives. After children are involved with the scenerio then your life is no longer your own. It's our lives from then on out, because, in accordance with what we concider sane moral standards you should love and protect your child more then your own life and the person who co piloted that life into the world should feel the same way, hence the dicotomy of marriage.

BTW there are several animals on the planet who have one partner and mate for life (many species of bird do this) and conversely there are other species of animal where one mate kills the other after they've courted(many forms of insect). So basing relationships after natures past is purely arbitry and should not be taken to heart.

 

[Shiftkey]

1. Is it?

That's like saying the most efficent way to get fat is to eat 1 cheeseburger per meal instead of 4.

If I am ****ing 2 women, assuming both are both able to bear kids, and I am not sterile, my odds DOUBLE in being able to procreate. Hell, I can have two kids at the same time (Trust me)

Hehe well from a purely technical standpoint of just poping out babies you're correct. I meant actually raising the children.

2. Has a little more validity but not by much. Humans are only jealous of things they cannot obtain.

If I saw you driving a new Geo Metro down the street (no offense to anyone who is driving one), I am not going to get jealous because you posses this car I have.

Needless to say, If I am man enough to wear more than one woman likes me, to the point where they will openly live with and compete for my time, you think I honeslty give a damn if one leaves? And the women wouldn't be jealous becuase a) there is an understanding, they you the man belong to these women, or visa versa (just like I don't get mad when I know a woman is getting ****ed by a guy that's not me) and b) they do have you.. just not all the time

What if one of your women had two or more boyfriends? Would you be ok with that? I wouldn't, and I wouldn't want to put someone I cared about through that either.

 

[diplomatic_lies]

What if one of your women had two or more boyfriends? Would you be ok with that?

That's actually a very good point. I know if my girlfriend had 5 other boyfriends, I'd feel kind of weird.

Mind you, I happen to live in a highly advanced, wealthy society. Some of you may live in backwater Third World nations where its ok to have 20 wives and cannibalism is an accepted way of life. In which case, go for it!


By the way, can you guys PLEASE stop comparing humans to animals? Some animals eat their husbands or babies, somehow I don't think humans are going to do the same.

 

[PRMoon]

BTW there are several animals on the planet who have one partner and mate for life (many species of bird do this) and conversely there are other species of animal where one mate kills the other after they've courted(many forms of insect). So basing relationships after natures past is purely arbitry and should not be taken to heart.

By the way, can you guys PLEASE stop comparing humans to animals? Some animals eat their husbands or babies, somehow I don't think humans are going to do the same.

Errrr, is there an echo in the thread:yes: :crazy:

 

[SexPDX]

Anthropologically speaking, monogamy was never very important to hunter/gatherer cultures. Maybe some jealousy or what not, but it ended there. Men were coming and going more often while women tended to stay closer to the settlements. It is believed to have largely been taken for granted that women had multiple partners.

Agriculture changed things because the land itself was important as a source of sustainence. It required people to cultivate the land and it was in the individual's best interest to know for sure who his offspring were, and the best way of doing this was to make sure the women weren't messing around with anyone else. Since civilization developed most rapidly with the advent of argriculture, this monogamy concept is rooted deeply within us.

 

[Consent]

You proably come from a broken family and do not understand the joys of unconditional(almost) love. If you want children marriage is the safest, smartest, and most productive manner to raise a child.

Marriage and morality prevents most of the woes that our society faces, and this is extremely true for minorities. John McWhorter has done alot of writing on this.

I can tell by the way you wrote that that you must be a religious sheep probably forced on by religion at a very young age.

 

[Shiftkey]

Good to see you back TrickyNick.

I can tell by the way you wrote that that you must be a religious sheep probably forced on by religion at a very young age.

It really has nothing to do with religion - it just makes sense.

 

[Warboss Alex]

When you meet someone special, you'll realise it's not such a bad concept after all.

 

[Nighthawk]

LTR = no condom. Bareback rules.

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

I can tell by the way you wrote that that you must be a religious sheep probably forced on by religion at a very young age.

I go to church, but I am not some religious sheep who doesn't question religion, God, life, and people everyday.

It is simply the truth that marriage is GREAT for society. If you really want to understand why do some research on groups of people that do not collectively hold marriage as important, and you will definitely find strife.

Living TRUTH, baby.:rockon:

 

[A-Unit]

Re:

To me, it's a nice idea. It's wonderful. It's definately something I want. When I think of monogomy, I think of Marriage. Not dating, not relationships. In relationships not of the marital ilk we get jailed by our emotions.

If I was to marry, it would be of the most prime meat kind. Any guy who has been modestly promiscuous, or at least dated a few women, MIGHT cherish a girl who's "rare." Or at least you connect with. Believe me, when you date around, as most of you, most girls are quite the same. Not degrading women, but each woman wants to be KNOWN as special. Hence, Myspace. In her own mind, Dad's made her a Princess. And she wants that. But it depends if she has spent her life BUILDING herself up, or DRAGGING herself down.

Women might not like the double standard, but it's very true. I don't know what the odds of me finding a pornstar-looking virgin, with the home-making skills of Martha Stewart, the common sense of Ann Landers, and the sex drive of Jenna Jameson, but I'm willing to PUT it out there, and let the universe change my opinion. I'll believe. Because it's happened. As I've said, I've always "attracted" the precise girl I wanted at the moment I was ready for her. And I always will.

Do this:

Write down the 1 type of girl, every feature included, that would KNOCK you over. And see if you decide monogamy COULD be possible. I think Monogamy with any broad sucks. But with one special girl it's great. The downside is, disease spreads crazy quick, and you should, as a man, at least take care of your offspring.


A-Unit

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

^^^ My friend has made similar comments about once he and his girl are married that he will not longer cheat on her, because she is the ONE, she's special and all that stuff. He's actively cheating on her, and I think it's going to be awful hard for any guy that loves jumping around from bed to bed to settle down... it just doesn't happen like that.

 

[STR8UP]

Backbreaker-

I would be willing to bet that part of the reason why you would bring this up is the fact that you are in a different league than most men are in the mating game.

Fact is, men with low social value are really the only ones who benefit from the concept. It's in their best interest to tie someone down. But for guys like you, what benefit is there to settle down with one woman, when you KNOW that there are ten others waiting in line?

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

Puzzy is EVERYWHERE and when you are "that dude" (me) sex is nothing, but an urge. I'm not some wannbe pimp or player; instead, I prefer to be silly, goofy, charismatic me, a guy that natural attracts all kinds of people to him. I could fk several different girls every night, but that doesn't make me happy. I've done that and it is not as rewarding as being with someone who honestly cares, and no I'm not talking about creating the kinds of parasitic illusions that you guys dream about, having a harem of women that are willing to give up their self worth for your happiness. I enjoy real relationships with real women that have self-respect and values. So, monogamy will be my ideal regardless of how much I make. You cannot deny 1000's of years of biology and socialization.

 

[Consent]

I go to church, but I am not some religious sheep who doesn't question religion, God, life, and people everyday.

Aren't you the person who said that you were going to marry a religious girl just because your family wanted you to or else they wouldn't show up at your wedding. And so you had to follow it.

It is simply the truth that marriage is GREAT for society. If you really want to understand why do some research on groups of people that do not collectively hold marriage as important, and you will definitely find strife.

I just did some quick research and I found that there were many soceity's that practiced polygamy, including the Chinese, and it worked out well for them. The queston isn't about marriage, it's about polygamy.