URGENT! Another DJ is stealing my woman..how do I fight back???

00Kevin

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Originally posted by Jet Jockey
Thanks to you all you have all presented some hellaciously good advice!

I pretty much had it straight in my own mind before my last post tho... just wanted to give ya all a update!

Heres how I see it: She can call my friends. She can call the pope. She can call the president! Some will tell her to shut up, some will listen, and not say anything, and a few might come to me and say WTF man, that chick wants you, your not going to move on that?


Answer: NOT ANYMORE THAN I WOULD MOVE ON A ROAD KILLED SKUNK, CUZ SHE SMELLS LIKE ONE!

As for the friends, you all are right..its a amazingly good opportunity to separate the wheat from the chaff as prosemont I think put it... The ones that play the end against the middle in this case I will put on my ignore list as well. Yes it is unfortunate the bictcch has to play all these games, and a few folks that i otherwise do not want to know about it will get to hear her crying and ranting before they figure out what hit them, but such is the price of love and war...there are always a few casualities!!

The chick Jennifer I got a date with after squirrel chick..well i nexted her already to. DAMN!. Well she tried to play the old make a date, break a date routine. Second time that happened, i didn't return calls, emails etc. She's done. Next.

I do have another question for ya all while I am here. The biotch managed to snag onto two things that are super I mean SUPER important to me. My Dogtags from when I was military (went to war wearing those, kinda sentimental) and a irreplaceable picture of my Grandma, only one that I have. The dog tags spell the most trouble...they have your ssn on them !!! I want that **** back. I have been trying to figure a way. I sure the hell don't want to have to call her to get them, cuz if i act the least bit interested, she will use them as leverage. I can't let her keep em, cuz there is too much she can do with them when it dawns on her..I doubt she has figured it out yet, but sooner or later.. Thought about going in her house while she was gone...i still have a key, but nixed that idea right away...too risky. Somehow I need to get her to fork em over, thought about calling the cops and having them go to her place with me, cuz she would be more apt to take that serious and not jack around and just give them over so i could go... I duuno about that idea either. maybe one of you guys has dealt with this before? advice? I'm all ears!
all you have to do is call the police and ask for an escort to her place. tell them that she is crazy and unstable and you want your property back. at the same time file the police report regarding her male friend. I know a guy that did this and it worked. the police will be more than happy to protect you from a kitchen knife. it will also send a clear message to her. she will realize that you think she is a nutcase and dangerous. If she refused to give you back your dog tags file charges with the police for theft
 
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Jet Jockey

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Falcon I hear what you are saying. I couldn't bang this chick now tho LOL. I would probably vomit all over her or something if i thought about the strange things that have been crawling in and out of her . OMG!

Actually, I found a angle! I had forgotten I had bought some popcorn from her son who is 9 and in boy scouts. So i played that card. I emailed her, and asked her if I was going to have to go to the boy scouts and demand my money back, or would the popcon be delivered as promised? Well, that put a little pressure on her to " do th right thing" because it IS for her kid as much as for me. I told her I'd meet her at a nearby cafe to get my popcorn, and while she was there, she could give me my tags and my pic back, and all would be fine. I even mentioned tha, "ya know, maybe SOMEDAY we can be friends at least, but it will really depend on what you do now.

I did that for a reason. I do not want to go thru a bunch of pretending to be her friend in the here and NOW because I am not a fake person, so I just can't do that. I am actually quite honest! It gives her something to strive fo even if it is a long shot, yet, it lets me off the hook, cuz my bet is she will find another guy to ho with, and never want to follow up. If she should contact me a year from now or something, I'll be weary of her, but I can take it on its own merits then etc. Main thing was to get my stuff back, which looks like I will, and not sink to her level and lie etc, which I won't. Ok now to go get at least 5 phone numbers for potential dates.....gotta go guys!
 

Zeus

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Originally posted by Jet Jockey
URGENT! Another DJ is stealing my woman..how do I fight back???
The advice I need is simple. I am 40 years old. I have been seeing a single mom for about 4 or 5 months now. we get along good. We have had our share of disagreements, and stuff, but we always,get over it and work it out. Usually I am fair, firm and consistent, which pays off. Not AFC or anything, Just I take responsibility if it turns out I was wrong, and if it turns out she was wrong she eventually takes that responsibility.

She went to a party 2 weeks ago saturday night. Met a guy there she knew and had the hots for when they lived in the same apt. complex, but both were (unhappily) married at the time. I have to work sometimes on the weekends, so that is how she went alone..

Well apparently this guy invited her out to his pad about 2 hour drive away the next day (sunday) She went, cuz she claims she hadn't seen him in so long (8 or 9 years). They used to be good friends.

Well, I had to work this weekend, and she spent all day this Saturday out at his place. He is moving in on her like a pro, and predictably, she likes the attention. I told her I might have Friday off this coming week, and she thought for awhile, then informed me, that this guy and his roomate were coming up to see her, and stay Fri, and Sat and go home on Sunday. Now this is getting out of hand!!! I objected, told her that this was BS, and I think her old "friend" is getting to "friendly"! She countered with...yuck, I can't stand it when you get jealous...yada yada yada...basically trying to make it look like I was being unreasonable. Yet she tells me she loves me etc, we were fine until prince Charming rode into town. From what I can tell, he is a bonafide DJ, Maybe much better than I. He knows how to use character assasination on me, raise doubts in her mind about us, in other words, he is using every tactic in the book at his disposal. I know she is letting him, which is not cool. Some will say, that if her interest level were higher in me that this would not be happening... but this guy is good, she had the hots for him and I am sure alot of unacted on fantasies... so I don't think it would matter how interested she is in anyone...She finds him attractive, he is persuasive and persistant. If this keeps snowballing, he is going to succeed in getting to her. I know it may sound funny but I think ANY woman can be torn from her man if the right tactics and DJ know how is used. So I think I need to fight fire with fire here, not ready to next her, but sure the hell not ready to sit on my hands and do nothing! Letting her call me would be a bad move I think, since Romeo will surely "fill" in her slack time, among other things if he can weasel his way in. I have tried saying "Look, it pi$$es me off that you are hanging out to much with him, and it needs to stop...but then I sound like the jealous AFC. She has admitted to him giving her a quick kiss already.. He is kino'ing her i am sure. I know sex wasn't possible cuz she hasn't been alone with him YET, but that will probably happen this weekend, and i expect him to make a move. OK Guys, if you weren't ready to let some a-hole steal your woman, how would you combat his very, very good DJ skills? Any Ideas?????? Friday is coming fast!!!!!


War of the Jedi Knights?
 

sql

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jet, this has been epic for you. i hope you got your tags and grandma back safely and without having to bust out any crazy kung foo.

something i noticed people almost said but never spelled out about her was the fact that any woman who is wifey material would never allow herself to be put in a situation that would make you uncomfortable. i cant imagine qualifying any woman who would even give a thought to disrespecting me or the relationship in such a way for an LTR. it seems to me that someone who would be wifey material would never even entertain the notion of spending more than x hours with someone thats not a) me, b) her family or c) female friends

d) none of the above without me is just unaccepatable and shows she's not as in me as she wants me to believe.

just something i thought should be said. and im very glad you have been able to see through this and realized its not about dueling another dj, because any woman thats made it that far into your heart would NEVER let any other dj seduce her, no matter how good a dj he is. she'd be straight with you and keep her own distance on her own. no action needed no your part.

2 cents
 

MickoZ

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1. Personnaly, even thought a lot of you guys are against it, I believe male-female friendship is possible and SHOULD be accepted. I won't really accept that my gf diss me for a female friend, especially if it is a long term friend. Guy or girl, a friend is a friend. Often there is a background story behind guy/girl relationship, often not too. And do not be an hypocryte as I am sure a lot of you have friend that are female ;-) And if you marry/have LTR, will those be out of your friend list? If yes, that is just sad IMHO.

2. My first point still apply to this case and yes it could have been possible it was one of her good friend, but Jet know more about the situation and I won't analyse everything without know everything. But that attitude of ask everyone to call, even her male friend... is pathetic (especially to threat you, that is uber crap), but seem like girls are really often into that... they believe it can "fix thing out"... sometime know the real willingness is hard... sometime the easy way is just NEXT even if there is always exception... I guess that is a tactic for productivity? ;-) [get most of the worse case out, do not feel bad for the potential "ok case"]

If it was not of that point 2, I would still think it is ok, but point 2 is a major annoyance in life (from gf or from other people too of course...)

However good luck, have fun and enjoy *every* second of your life. ;-)
 

Hirez

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Damn...I Leave For A Year and Come Back To This?

I read through this whole damn post because I am bored as **** in class and just wanted to point out a few things since I am officially back...

1. Jet - You are not a DJ'r and I would appreciate you stopping calling yourself that...you have not as of yet demonstrated sufficient aptitude nor character of a DJ'r...

2. Jet - You are not an Alpha male...you are not even a Beta male...your lack of strength and character is abundantly evident...even after you gathered the strength to next her...

Enough Criticism...we all start our DJ'ing career from various points...so some constructive advice...

1st...you really need to look in the mirror Jet and determine what kind of guy you are currently and what kind of guy you want to be...you are obviously manifesting a substantial amount of weakness other wise the woman would not DARE to tell you she was going to see another guy...that is how I know you are not an Alpha Male...

2nd...The strength of a true DJ'r is not in the techniques that they use but their psychological strength and the courage to make a tough decision RATIONALLY that may not be the happiest emotionally...YOU HAVE STARTED ON THIS PATH...congratulations...

3rd...You really need to find an individual to model...and begin to act like you are an Alpha male...although this forum is nice you can only learn so much from typing on a screen...look for some one you want to be like and model him until it becomes natural for you to be an Alpha male...


Your fundamental problem is that you are approaching life from a position of inferiority, now this may be subconscious but back pedalling through life will keep you getting your ass kicked...

Good Luck, Keep Working Hard...
 

Jet Jockey

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Re: Damn...I Leave For A Year and Come Back To This?

Originally posted by Hirez
I read through this whole damn post because I am bored as **** in class and just wanted to point out a few things since I am officially back...

1. Jet - You are not a DJ'r and I would appreciate you stopping calling yourself that...you have not as of yet demonstrated sufficient aptitude nor character of a DJ'r...

2. Jet - You are not an Alpha male...you are not even a Beta male...your lack of strength and character is abundantly evident...even after you gathered the strength to next her...

Enough Criticism...we all start our DJ'ing career from various points...so some constructive advice...

1st...you really need to look in the mirror Jet and determine what kind of guy you are currently and what kind of guy you want to be...you are obviously manifesting a substantial amount of weakness other wise the woman would not DARE to tell you she was going to see another guy...that is how I know you are not an Alpha Male...

2nd...The strength of a true DJ'r is not in the techniques that they use but their psychological strength and the courage to make a tough decision RATIONALLY that may not be the happiest emotionally...YOU HAVE STARTED ON THIS PATH...congratulations...

3rd...You really need to find an individual to model...and begin to act like you are an Alpha male...although this forum is nice you can only learn so much from typing on a screen...look for some one you want to be like and model him until it becomes natural for you to be an Alpha male...


Your fundamental problem is that you are approaching life from a position of inferiority, now this may be subconscious but back pedalling through life will keep you getting your ass kicked...

Good Luck, Keep Working Hard...
Hirez...have you ever been with a chick and broke it off because of her substandard behavior? Of course you have, everyone has. The woman DARED to tell me she was going to do this shyt anyways, because she turned out to be a flake. When I met her, she seemed to be pretty sound, and rational, and LTR material. That is why we all date them before we marry them...it gives us a chance to see what they are going to be like. Just because she is a squirrel, does not make me a squirrel lover or anything. LOL My point is, I may or maynot be a DJ in your eyes or anyone elses, but I really don't care. I was Firm, Fair, and consistent with this chick. In other words, I gave her a chance to be whoever the hell she really was...and you saw the outcome. I am not with her cuz I did not want that in my life. Yet, I was fair. Nobody ever said being a DJ means you have to be UNFAIR.

I was fair, because i made my opinion and wishes known to her, and if she had been LTR material, that would have been enough. In this life, not everyone is going to do what you want, I don't care how good you are at "pyschological control". Bottom line is..she wanted to do something. I did not want her to do it, because it was disrespectful to me. She did it anyway, so of course there are consequences she must pay. I no longer wish to be around her, since she obviously can't keep her legs together, and I don't share. Its pretty cut and dried isn't it? Or is it?

I also am not on a quest to "dominate" be a alpha male ( I am not in a dog pack ok!) My main concern, is that I show decent morals, soundness of character, and be fair, but at the same time I take no crap. I have plenty of confidence there dude! I don't next every chick that has a friend, ( a sign of insecurity if I did) because, if the chick has no friends, then what does that say about her? BUT....If a chick has a friend that wants to be more than friends, and she goes for it..see ya, bye bye! Chicks are very good at that, have there cake and eat it to shyt. Well she got a shyt pie didn't she!! LMAO.

I would also tell you, that before you question whether or not I am a DJ'r, or a "Alpha" ya might want to look in that proverbial mirror yourself. I am probably more Alpha, than you know, cuz I really don't give a shyt, what the situation is..I have a calm cool and collected confidence that i can get myself right the hell out of anything I get myself into! As a matter of fact, my approach to life is a simple one. I know i can do anything i set my mind to, and that includes getting that HB9 sittin over there in the corner etc. I have proven that many a time..but that doesn't prove a thing. Some things aren't worth it! Just because you can get it, doesn't mean its what you really want or need. I could have kept this chick, she certainly realized what she lost, but why would I do that? She can't be trusted! Now if I was AFC, I'd be letting her come back. That will never happen.

No, hirez, you are barking up the wrong tree with your post. It ain't no big thing. I figure you post on a board like this, there is always gonna be somebody, gonna have more hindsight than me. But hindsight is 20/20. Even I have that. point being, we all live and learn. I don't need a "role" model as you suggest. experience is the best teacher, and I'll bet I have a little bit more than you do. Once in a while, we all run into a chick that turns out to be a "mirage" , meaning she isn't what she appears to be. I think I have handled this situation well, but first I gathered the facts, carefully thought it thru, and acted on it. The fact that I made the right choice, is proof enough that i am on the right path. I think most here would agree.

Hirez, so tell me what you would have done diffrently? What would a "real DJ" have done? same scenario......and don't give me any BS about "well I would have never been with a chick like that to start with." You have never been with a chick that had friends? I would hope the chicks you see would have friends. Which gives it potential for the chick to pull exactly what his one did. There was no early warning here, no red flag until right before it happened. And even then, I needed to find out what the true situation was, not just freak out. You don't next a chick based on your own insecurities, or what something "looks like" until you have the info about waht it is! As you noticed, as soon as I got the complete picture of what she was doing, I did what had to be done. If it took awhile, then no skin off my azz, when I do something, such as next a chick, the decision is usually irreversible, which means I better damn sure have my facts straight! At first I was wanting to out DJ this guy, but i was mistaken..he is no DJ, merely a opportunist. Hell even the sun shines on a dogs azz once in awhile LMAO.

So to answer your post, If I was surrounded by Alpha males, and trying to score with some chick, it wouldn't affect my game whatsoever. I never claimed to be the biggest baddest DJ of them all, but you don't NEED to be. Common sense goes a long way bro. If I really wanted her, I could have her, but I think I'll leave her with him and that can be his punishment for his part in all of this. As far as inferior, naw I don't think so. I approach things from a angle I imagine you've never seen before. Nothing inferior here. If you meet a chick that turns flaky, it does not make you inferior. You are not inferior unless you let yourself get pvssywhipped, which I certainly did not. Oh by the way... I did meet this guy today. She said she would be out to bring my Dogtags and pictures back, and i said great ( this way she has to drive etc, I can actually have more control over what goes down if its my property) She shows up with dogface in tow. He gets out, stomps up like he is the gestapo or something. I put out my hand shook his hand, being sure to squeeze VERY hard until you could almost feel his fingers crumble. He looks at me introduces his self... I tell him who I am. he proceeds to give me shyt about hurting her feelings blah blah blah, and I interrupt, saying "look dude, You wanted her, you got her, shes yours have fun". I said this so she could hear. I said" if she is gonna cheat on me, she is going to cheat on you...get it"? It got real quiet..I said "why did you come anyway are you gonna try to beat me up"? If your gonna teach me a lesson, better bring it on! He says "no man, I don't want no trouble with you, its cool, everythings cool". then he jumps in the slutt mobile and they ride off...Good fvcking riddance. I look for him to think about it, shyt he already knows....she will not have him either. oh well another consequence. LOL
 

The Dominated1

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Jet you are my hero.

I get jerked all the time from women, but dont want to break up, and don't want to feel the pain of seperation even get oneitis with chicks I hardly know.

Even though I know better than this

Sometimes I wonder what happended to my balls!
 

Jet Jockey

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Dominated 1...

You got balls!!!
Women are so FUBAR most of the time, it is hard for a guy to make any sense of them!

So don't even try!

Just separate the wheat from the chaff..and keep your self respect!

Remember the oneitis is a symptom...feel the burn? When you work out and your muscles ache.....feel the burn?

But you know you are getting in better and better shape right?

Oneitis is a condition caused mainly by woman that are all you know.

The cure is to "workout" with other woman..i know it sounds retarded..but take no shyt!!

Women today, are spoiled little biotches 95% of them, and if they can call the shots they will!

The best way to avoid oneitis is try to be selective, and when you have done everything else to the best of your ability.....stand firm.

Get it set in your mind before hand..( I don't recommend, growing balls over night like i did, altho it worked for me) what behavior is acceptable, and what is not. And for each behavior have a set of consequences for her. ALWAYS!!!

If she does good... she gets a few rewards...that would mostly be your continued interaction with her.

If she is a fvck up...then treat her accordingly. Why should she be exempt form the same consequences she would GIVE you for the same behavior? Fair is fair right?
Be fair
This means, know your shyt. Your decisions are final. But they are always fair.
Be consistent. Same behavior will ALWAYS get same response from you. I don't care if its a HB6 or a HB 9 gotta keep consistent. That will help you to not get lost in the situation, etc.
thirdly, be Firm!
YOU are in control. If she thinks not, think not of her!

Oneitis is your mind saying I had to break a bad habit today....it does get easier... just takes time. Find another "habit" to take its place. You'll do alright!!!!
 
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jet jockey i never saw so much attention given to so little of a problem - congratulations your title was so misleading that we got caught up in your drama-less drama - u like attention dont u!!!!!

u r not fooling me!!
 

Jet Jockey

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Puerto rican_lover

I came here with a "situation" like almost everyone does.

The answer was already inside myself...but everyone here just confirmed it...that is good.

Sorry if I stole any of your attention!

I have given many, many bits of advice to others on here, in exchange. All good, all real.

Just ask a question..I'm sure the board will answer... hopefully you don't know it all ALREADY!

Some of us, actually use this board constructvely!

Sorry you are so bitter. Hope you get better!!!
 

JustDoItAlways

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Hey Jet, I think you handled this whole situation EXACTLY right.

In my mind, this is what being a man in today's world entails.
Chicks today think they can get away with just about anything. It is up to us men to start setting rules and boundaries again and enforce consequences when those boundaries are crossed.

Obviously, this chick wasn't worth putting any more effort into. But think about how many other women will get the message when they hear about this story (sounds like they will given the way she is spreading it all around town and in your group of friends. No matter how she spins it, all the chicks will understand what really happened. They will also understand how broken up she is about the whole thing.)

Think about how many women in your town will now be very attracted to you when they hear about this story (chicks can't help it, they are attracted to a real man). Think about how your new prospects will know that they have to behave because you set boundaries and enforce consequences.

These hater guys above are just jealous about how well you handled it. The worst trait a man can have is to be jealous of how well another guy handles his business.
 

G_S

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Glad things worked out for you Jet! So you DID get your stuff back?
 
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i m not bitter - i am just pointing out your misleading ttile -

"another dj s stealing my woman - how do i fight back"

how do u know he is a dj " and to say "another dj" is to inply that u r one yourself...

there is no such thing as another guy trying to "steal" another guy's woman

if the woman is not satisfied with the man that she is with then she will seek another on her own doing - it is not the other man that is the problem - your focus is way off - rather the problem is laying right next to u in your bed - it is your girl that is allowing herself to b "stolen" - figureatively - speaking.

u should of been a true dj a long time ago and kicked her to the curb with steel toe boots on and then kick yourself in the ass for focusing on the wrong person and spinning your wheels.

Just say no to hos!!!!!
 

Hirez

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Real Brief...Jet...

And I will be back later...

First...let me state this...

In addition to my standard business degrees, I am a certified hypnotherapist, and Nuero-Linguistic Programming, in addition I am one or two classes short of my counseling degree, I have taken multiple courses on persuasion when I was a speech communication major and I practice the **** and have written various articles for the Sosuave and other web sites in my past...blah blah blah...

My point is that on this site, you will find a few types of people...

New people who are learning - (good to see someone else going through similar struggles)
Amateurs who have just started practicing - (good to see someone a step above you)
Masters who are practicing and teaching - (people who have at least 75% percent of the game mastered)
Phd who have the game master on many levels - (People who have the techniques down cold, can quote you chapter and verse for Jefferies, etc.)
And people like myself, who apply rational scientific techniques from diverse academic fields to be a better "Don Juan" if you will (teaches you the why things work as well as the how to accomplish them)...

You can learn from all types but recognize what you will get from each one of them...unfornutaley from the last time I frequented this site, there were fewer newbies and amateurs than I see now...be that as it may...

I made statements not necessarily based upon the words that you posted but what your actually posting those words indicates about your self-perception...similar to how non-verbal language is weighted stronger than verbal language, so to are the what and why's of the post a stronger indicator of your internal orientation to the world as opposed to simply the words on the post...

Anyone can say, I am ****ing confident dude, but the way you frame the questions seeking acceptance from others, attempting to maintain a false sense of "being in control" indicate to me that you are not yet to the point of being an alpha male...

Now is that negative, no, not at all, we are all on different levels and it is my assumption that you would not be here if you did not want to get better...

So for you and the first and last time on this site, when I have a little more time, I will go back through your post and dissect it to the minutia to give you a clear view of what I am talking about...
 

Jet Jockey

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to puerto rican _lover
My title should have been diffrent. It should have been, She's a ho !!!
I agree! She is the one that did this of her own volition. In the very beginning I allowed myself to confuse the issues. At first I thought, Damn! What a stroke of bad luck! If she hadn't run into this guy she had repressed feelings for, for the last 9 years, things would have been ok.
WRONG!!! Things would not have been ok. Heck, they might have just been PROLONGED!!!!! EWWWWWW!
She actually did me a favor without knowing it. Lets say we had merrily went along for another 2 years...lets say, she moved in by then, lets say, she was wearing my ring...this could have been very costly had it happened later!!!
Yes, say no to ho's!!

To Hirez:
Many of the post I have put on here are either updates, or in a few instances, I am asking what others would do. I am not looking for anybodies "approval" using it more to facilitate the decision making process. If i get 10 guys all saying do this...then that tells me that whatever it is deserves careful consideration. Plus, there have been a few ideas I would have never even thought of.
Hirez, could you please hypnotize this bytch, and make her go away? LOL


No matter. I got my stuff back from her, kept my Self respect by ditching her. I really don't give a rats azz anymore. My main focus now is on my personal growth, and on finding Jet's next main squeeze....that be all. By the way, My degree is in Biology, with a minor in Pyschology. I am also a Registered Respiratory therapist, and a Certified Cardiology Technician. I am also a Pilot, and have flown f-106 delta darts, f-4 Phantoms, and in the first desert storm flew f-15's. Naw..there is no way I could be a Alpha male..that takes balls, and as you can see i have none. LMAO.
 
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jet jockey i think u came a long way (for the better) since u posted this thread - just next time see the obvious signs of a what a ho is and does...

and if u still go after her then thats cool but then dont complain when u get bitten from playing with a rattle snake and r surprised that the snake acted out its true nature - dont blame the snake for being a snake (what else did u expect it to do?) blame yourself for not treading wirh caution and for keeping company with snakes in the first place!!!!

SAY NO TO HOS!!!
 
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Location
Wisconsin. USA
o by the way your title says "how do i fight back"

is she worthy - "to fight" for?

remember u didnt lose her to another guy - she didnt want u and she fled to him - how do u fight back and win when its your girl ho that is your challenger - there is no fight to take place because she stepped out of the ring! u r fighting by and with yoyurself.
 

BMW

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 14, 2002
Messages
365
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1
Location
NYC
why would u stay with a woman like that?
 

The Dominated1

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 24, 2002
Messages
169
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0
Location
Australia
Jet

I want you to be my personal mentor.

If you can find the time I would like advice for some situations that I am in. Kind of tired of the you are an afc loser replies from teenagers and would like some constructive positive advice from somebody who may actually have some advice to offer. I will pm you soon.
 
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