Ugly situation

[Lollita_Luvr]

You seem a bit preoccupied with the notion you have something to prove to her. Like she's gonna magically crack and start bawling and begging for forgiveness for doing you so wrong (even though you recently reminded her of your infidelity so technically it's just payback in her mind).

Then what? I can't help but to think you'd fall for that BS in a second. Dude, this chick is poison. She doesn't leave you because she likes the security and familiarity you offer, while at the same time sneaking around and banging another dude. She has her cake and is eating it, too.

Do yourself a huge favor and get this chick out of your life ASA- muthufvckin-P. Don't be the guy who asks for advice on such a clear cut matter and not take it. Good luck homie.

I agree buddy. I am just trying to piece some puzzles together. And you are right, she is like poison to me.
Its affecting my sleep, my eating and I am becoming obsessed with sneaking around and trying to get as much info...
Phuck I feel like some detective on Cheaters.

Im gonna get her out by the end of this weekend. Ill print them out and come up and say you lied again, Im done here.

Maybe after a few months without me she will realise what she had and what she has lost.

I actually cant believe I am in this situation right now, I used to coach guys how to pick up and date women and do the exact opposite of what I am doing right now... and look at me... I guess once you do come across a girl who is everything you hoped for she would be, thats the most dangerous situation to be in.

 

[darkstarrr]

Im gonna get her out by the end of this weekend. Ill print them out and come up and say you lied again, Im done here.

I actually cant believe I am in this situation right now, I used to coach guys how to pick up and date women and do the exact opposite of what I am doing right now... and look at me... I guess once you do come across a girl who is everything you hoped for she would be, thats the most dangerous situation to be in.

I know its so difficult. I understand exactly what you are going through. Understand that by not doing what you must, you are only enabling your own suffering to continue. If you do as you have been told you will feel so great about yourself. Demand your self respect. Forget about what happened in the past. The time is now and the future is tomorrow. She chose to stay with you after what happened. You changed. There is no real way of addressing this with her by communication. She seems like the type of person to only hide it better next time. Very deceitful. Master Yoda would smuggly agree.

Keep us posted with your progress. And please do provide your email address (so I can send the funds via paypal to help with your moving/movers inconvenience) after you box her shit up and have it dropped at her parents during a time when she is not around to stop you or manipulate you into feeling bad. She will try to fuck with you, remember that.

Over and out.

 

[Lollita_Luvr]

I know its so difficult. I understand exactly what you are going through. Understand that by not doing what you must, you are only enabling your own suffering to continue. If you do as you have been told you will feel so great about yourself. Demand your self respect. Forget about what happened in the past. The time is now and the future is tomorrow. She chose to stay with you after what happened. You changed. There is no real way of addressing this with her by communication. She seems like the type of person to only hide it better next time. Very deceitful. Master Yoda would smuggly agree.

Keep us posted with your progress. And please do provide your email address (so I can send the funds via paypal to help with your moving/movers inconvenience) after you box her shit up and have it dropped at her parents during a time when she is not around to stop you or manipulate you into feeling bad. She will try to fuck with you, remember that.

Over and out.

Yes it is heart wrenching... I had big plans with her and would never imagine in my worst nightmare her doing such a thing to me. Sure Ive been a prick to her a while back but I thought she forgave me and moved on.

Its also a shame, we had such lovely time recently... I guess its better to end it on a high and just call it quits rather than keep nagging, accusing and fighting with her. Just cut it off and move on. Let her sort herself out and let me get on with my life.

Yes she is very good at hiding and harbouring bad feelings... actually she is a champion at that.

I guess the last thing I wanted to discuss, how to handle myself during the break up speech. Show no emotion, dont cry (or at least do my best from crying), dont scream/yell or throw and break things around. Just give her the printed chats, say "You lied again, I cant do this anymore"...

Oh (and this gets better) and I dont think she used a condom with that guy either because in the sex chat she told him not to sleep around because "she doesnt wonna catch anything"...and she hates condoms and is on a pill.
So I am now at a risk of having some STD...

So maybe I should just go with:
"You lied again, I cant do this anymore, oh and I better do an STD check in May... HIV has a 3 month window period"...

Is this harsh or should I include the HIV line?

Then if she starts saying "what, what do you mean"... Ill just ask her to read each chat out loud and add a commentary.

We live in the same apartment os its kinda hard for me to just leave then as its mine but what should I do afterwards? Stay in my room or go for a drive to clear my head and get some fresh air? She will probably be on the phone or chat to that guy to come and save her.

I think if I see him anywhere near my apartment I will smash him... but then again I dont want this girl to put me in jail.

I think Ive hit rock bottom literally.

Once she moves out, I will ignore all her calls, sms, emails, chats and so on. I think Ill get in touch with my sarging buddies and hit up some clubs. I havent picked up for many years.

And plz dont worry about 50 bucks for moving costs, she is a big girl, she can pay for it, or her new BF can

 

[Jeffst1980]

This is a terrible situation. I feel for ya, man.

I don't really like the idea of discussing this with her at all. Since you have hard evidence, she doesn't deserve a rebuttal, and there is no way that you are going to keep your cool through such an emotionally charged encounter. You need to put this past you as quick as possible, so you want to minimize contact when you dump her sorry a$$.

Don't dump her at home. Meet her in a public place, tell her calmly that it's over because she cheated, and make arrangements for her to pick up her stuff. That's the LAST time you should be alone with her. DON'T GIVE HER ANY OPPORTUNITY TO TRY TO MANIPULATE YOU EMOTIONALLY. Have a buddy over when she comes to pick up her things so that she'll keep herself under control (hopefully). Then, delete her number, email, etc. and never look back. It is crucial that you have the support of your friends through this--have them forbid you from contacting her if necessary.

Since she found it breathtakingly easy to outright lie to you on several occasions, she's going to be a difficult one to shake, I guarantee it. Remember that if you don't dump her now, she WILL destroy your life in the future. There is absolutely no way you will get past this.

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

Dude - you are at such a tremendous advantage in this because it's all cut and dried for you. I am recently out of an LTR where all the indicators of branch swinging were there at the end, but I never had anything concrete, and all the unknowns really chewed on me for awhile. I used to wrench my guts out with sh*t like:
Do I deserve this?
Am I the good guy or the bad guy?
Was there another guy?
How did it come to this?

Getting hurt like this is murderous to a man's ego. But you are saved from the unknown in this situation-it won't knock you nearly as hard. You are the good guy (as long as you decide to stay that way). No confrontation, no throwing things in her face, no punching people, nothing at all. You will give her nothing - the effect of kicking someone out of your life is cushioned by you showing you were concerned enough to print things out and spy on her. Come out of this shining by not telling her you spied on her, not acknowledging the other guy, no histrionics in the parking lot, etc. You are 36 years old.

When we are hurt, we often forget the fundamentals of game. A rock solid foundation of confidence and SELF RESPECT makes for a strong floor of Unattachment To Outcome upon which we may frame our interactions with women with impunity. This petty talk of throwing things in her face and fighting people reeks of Outcome Dependency, and trust me, any AFCness you display now you will *cringe* of when you remember it two months from now.
Kick this parasite out of your life. Do what I did-throw yourself into your career and broadening business horizons-it will give you so much fulfillment and this (hopefully) short chapter of your life will be a footnote.

 

[Lollita_Luvr]

This is a terrible situation. I feel for ya, man.

I don't really like the idea of discussing this with her at all. Since you have hard evidence, she doesn't deserve a rebuttal, and there is no way that you are going to keep your cool through such an emotionally charged encounter. You need to put this past you as quick as possible, so you want to minimize contact when you dump her sorry a$$.

Don't dump her at home. Meet her in a public place, tell her calmly that it's over because she cheated, and make arrangements for her to pick up her stuff. That's the LAST time you should be alone with her. DON'T GIVE HER ANY OPPORTUNITY TO TRY TO MANIPULATE YOU EMOTIONALLY. Have a buddy over when she comes to pick up her things so that she'll keep herself under control (hopefully). Then, delete her number, email, etc. and never look back. It is crucial that you have the support of your friends through this--have them forbid you from contacting her if necessary.

Since she found it breathtakingly easy to outright lie to you on several occasions, she's going to be a difficult one to shake, I guarantee it. Remember that if you don't dump her now, she WILL destroy your life in the future. There is absolutely no way you will get past this.

Thanks bro.

Any other public places? A romantic place like a mountain (not to throw her off there lol) is out of the question? I think it is cos itll be a long drive back in the same car.

I will meet her in a public place, maybe say "Hey, lets go out for a drink tonight" and go to any local places or even shopping center near by.

Grab her a drink, sit down and say "You lied to me, you cheated on me and this is the end for us." Give her the printed notes, walk up and leave. She will obviously give chase but I shouldnt cave into her crying or tantrum... just walk.

Actually women's tears are the biggest smoke screen and manipulation attempt, they cry for anything.

I think asking a friend or two to keep me in check would be good, to tie up Friday and Sat nights... it will be lonely but phuck it gotta do it.


Also what do you guys think about this "GF Keeper" line I found on fast seduction many years ago:

PUA: I think about you day and night. You are so beautiful and I adore you. But now I must go.
You have touched me on a very deep level and it is more than I can bear.
I am helpless before other women and I will only hurt you and myself. I can't see you anymore.

Maybe change the last line to: You are helpless before other men and you will only hurt me and yourself. I can't be with you anymore.

 

[Lollita_Luvr]

Dude - you are at such a tremendous advantage in this because it's all cut and dried for you. I am recently out of an LTR where all the indicators of branch swinging were there at the end, but I never had anything concrete, and all the unknowns really chewed on me for awhile. I used to wrench my guts out with sh*t like:
Do I deserve this?
Am I the good guy or the bad guy?
Was there another guy?
How did it come to this?

Getting hurt like this is murderous to a man's ego. But you are saved from the unknown in this situation-it won't knock you nearly as hard. You are the good guy (as long as you decide to stay that way). No confrontation, no throwing things in her face, no punching people, nothing at all. You will give her nothing - the effect of kicking someone out of your life is cushioned by you showing you were concerned enough to print things out and spy on her. Come out of this shining by not telling her you spied on her, not acknowledging the other guy, no histrionics in the parking lot, etc. You are 36 years old.

When we are hurt, we often forget the fundamentals of game. A rock solid foundation of confidence and SELF RESPECT makes for a strong floor of Unattachment To Outcome upon which we may frame our interactions with women with impunity. This petty talk of throwing things in her face and fighting people reeks of Outcome Dependency, and trust me, any AFCness you display now you will *cringe* of when you remember it two months from now.
Kick this parasite out of your life. Do what I did-throw yourself into your career and broadening business horizons-it will give you so much fulfillment and this (hopefully) short chapter of your life will be a footnote.

Ah bro I feel for you, not knowing where it all went wrong is the worst.

Look, she knows I spy on her PC, she knows I check her email (she has one personal and one "public")... so if I show her the printed chats, she will not be surprised although she will be wondering how the heck I got access to her private stuff which can be a major blow for her.

But yes u are right, I will not confront, yell, scream, cry, punch walls or that other guy, I will simply tell her that its over, give her the prints and then walk off.

When she is back at home, I will ask her to move out as soon as possible with her dog and everything else. I love dogs and feel terrible for this but she chose to get it, not me.


Thank you guys so much for supporting me through this. I am a mess now, but will be back on my feet once this cancer is cut out of my life.

 

[darkstarrr]

Bro I say forget all the drama and do the shock and awe method. No explanation. No BS. Cut and dry. Cut and run. Then sit back and let your ego explode as she squirms like a fish out of water. Come on man you can do it. Please do what I couldn't and didn't and now wish I did. Reread the first posters post 10 times if you have to. Engaging her is doing a lot more for her than it will for you. You are opening yourself up for trouble if you do it that way I promise.

After you give her the boot if she tries to come back crawling (which i am 99% sure she will) it will be on your terms. You will have set a standard and precident that she can not get away with that kind of BS.

The only way a woman can feel true love (as they define it) is to know that there is something they can do that will cause them to lose you. Not setting that standard now by following the first poster's advice you are only sabotaging yourself in a way.

This is where you become a man. Feel the rush of positive chemical dumps once you do what you are told. Or risk feeling the crash and burn of neg chemical dumps if you do it any other way.

It's late here. Not trying to sound harsh. Just want to help you get through positively where I failed.

 

[Romjuan]

im with everyone else brother,
although it may feel like your getting the closure by confronting her, i think its best to not even do it. It will put you in a vulnerable state. i think its best to make the arrangements ahead of time for the movers to come and take her stuff, meanwhile you meet her out and tell her its over and that "as we speak the movers are moving your ****." be strong and know there is better days ahead.

 

[jgsf65]

Hi everybody. Sorry for my bad langage, but I'm from france. I've got some troubles with my girlfriend, and I was looking for some advices, but I saw lolita_luv in trouble.
You all guys are true saying that he should dump her right now without giving her any explanations. But there are so many ways, and we are different people. We can't move the same way all together in situations like this. Some men are "warriors", the others are a little bit romantic, etc.
I just want to give you another point of view. You are with her for 4 years now. That's long, and for sure there are feelings between you 2. You cheated on her once, and she forgave you. And you know why? maybe she was in love. If you really care about her, if you still have respect, or love for her, then talk to her. you should do it with a glass of wine, just talk, sincerly, with all your heart. Maybe she's scared to say the truth to you, maybe she's afraid of you reaction, or maybe she doesn't want to hurt you, because it should be not serious with the other guy. I think that you can give her one chance as she gave you one too. Talk to her, and ask her to talk sincerly too. tell her you know everything, and if she denied, then show her your chat copy. Her reaction is very important.
I 'm not telling you to be a woman. Be a man. Talk to her like a Man. Decide like a man. A man has to be respected. So talk to her, confront her, and there would be 2 solutions: If she still not saying the truth then dump her like a *****. The second solution is that she regrets everything and don't want to loose you. Then you have the choice to decide to forgive her. That's not an act of submission because to be forgived: she would do everything possible to be loved by you. I hope you will resolve your trouble.

 

[Demodulate]

change the locks.. stick her sh!t out side including the dog.. and print out the conversation and stick it on the door with "Its Over" written on it with black marker...

don not talk to her for a week...


after a week let her make arrangements to get the rest of her ****..

 

[DJDamage]

HOW DO I CONFRONT HER???

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RECn39jxNM&feature=related

If you are ballsy, I would ask her to join you to watch this scene and while she is watching it, have a pissed off look on your face like Tony Soprano

http://www.thesopranos.neostrada.pl/galeria/images/tony/carm_n_tony.jpg

and watch her face turn pale white as she caves in and confesses.

Or do what Clive Owen did.

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

The French guy is right about one thing, it's always so easy to look at someone else's situation and give perfect advice. The key to success in life is to follow the advice you give to others.

So Lollita, what would you advise to your buddy if he was in your situation? Would you say "Yeah, it's ok that she blatantly cheats on you, converses with other men from within the sanctity of your home, even makes less and less of an effort to hide it from you, USES YOU FOR SHELTER AND A MEAL TICKET"? Would you advise him to reason with her about why she had absolutely no respect for him and used him like a complete tool?

All this thinking is beating a dead horse, my friend.

We have all seen it, couples can get back together after breakups but if there was cheating involved, and it was DISCUSSED, it would never ever be anything like the idealized version of your relationship you are remembering now.

Women must respect a man to ever love him, and even if you "patched it up", in her eyes you will forever be a spineless pvssy because you took her cheating ass back! No matter what angle you are coming at it from, if you can be honest and use LOGIC like a MAN, it is the same sick conclusion you will always arrive at!

Ignore this talk of drinking wine with her and talking it out, it's ridiculous pvssy sh!t. This country was not built, nor will it be sustained by,the kind of men who accept this behavior from women! Don't waste any more of your life in this ridiculous situation. KICK HER OUT OF YOUR LIFE, I don't care if she's from mars and has no one here, it should have inspired her to be grateful.

The only good that can come of this situation is you will teach her a HUGE life lesson in an extremely painful way (the only way we really learn anything), and you will have your self respect back! You aren't hurting her for the sake of it. You are eradicating a cancer from your life!

 

[jophil28]

Yeah , indeed, what would Clint Eastwood do ?
How about Charlie Sheen or Charles Bronson ?

How about YOU, LL ? What you going to do and when ?

 

[Lollita_Luvr]

im with everyone else brother,
although it may feel like your getting the closure by confronting her, i think its best to not even do it. It will put you in a vulnerable state. i think its best to make the arrangements ahead of time for the movers to come and take her stuff, meanwhile you meet her out and tell her its over and that "as we speak the movers are moving your ****." be strong and know there is better days ahead.

Ok but where do I direct them to move her things? She has no one here but her friends, and I dont know where they live.

Its a bit of a grey area, sure if she had her parents here Id dothat but she has no one but that dude and I dont know where he lives.

 

[jophil28]

Ok but where do I direct them to move her things? She has no one here but her friends, and I dont know where they live.

Its a bit of a grey area, sure if she had her parents here Id dothat but she has no one but that dude and I dont know where he lives.

Do this ---
You pack up all her stuff while she is at work and ship it in storage.
Then you book a two star motel room in her name for two days. Pay in advance (forget about the money.. you swallow the cost, this will be fun ) and place the motel key and the storage key in an envelope. Write the addresses of storage and motel on the envelope. Choose a few of the most incriminating chat printouts, highlight the juicy parts, and place in the envelope as well.
When she arrives home and coming up the stairs grab her arm and say with a sly grin, " I have a big surprise for you, follow me in your car."
Drive to a coffee a coffee shop, get some latte's and talk casually for a bit.
BY now she is saying all excitedly, " What is the surprise .. ??"
Finish your coffee, hand her the envelope,and say, " Here it is. "

Get up and walk away as she is digesting the reality.

Then you ask yourself , "What would Charlie Sheen do next ?"

(and don't forget to change the locks)

 

[Mr. Me]

The problem with confronting is that the cheater typically answers in one of three ways:

1. Deny
2. Tell you you're imaging things
3. Accuses you of being the cheater

Even if they admit to it, they won't tell you the whole truth. And since she's shown she can lie to you, you won't even know if what she tells you is truthful or not. This is going to be one of episodes in your life that you're just going to have to not ever know exactly what happened.

You're over thinking what to say to end this, I understand you want to affect her with it. But the simpler and quicker it is, the better it is for you. Let me tell you something, she wants you to end it. That's why she hasn't left, since you're wondering why. She doesn't want to be the one to do the dirty work.

Here's how I ended things with my wife when I discovered she was cheating. A couple of days later, we were in the city doing some errands. I discovered her infidelity on a Friday and kept my mouth shut for the weekend trying to figure out what to do. On Monday, we went into the city to run some errands and I just brought it up and told her I knew about her and the ex she was seeing. She admitted to some of it. I had proof so she couldn't deny it. Then I did something very emotionally difficult, but something I felt I needed to do, because there was no way I could have her back under my roof, her betraying a$$ next to me in my bed while I sleep... so I demanded she give me her house keys, took them and left her there. And I think that's kind of how you have to do it.

Kick them to the curb fast.

You know, she didn't object to handing them over, but told everybody how hostile an act that was.

But her betraying her husband, how curious they don't see that as hostile.

They don't deserve more from you then a swift kick out.

 

[Lollita_Luvr]

Hi jgsf65.

Your language is great, dont worry.

This is the thing, if I was NOT living with her, if I only went out with her for a year or less, then I would not hesitate to end the relationship right there and then and shutting her out (especially if she had her folks here).

But it a LOT more complicated than most dating situations.
As my situation a special yellow flower? Well it may be or may be not, but it is unique in its own way.

You are right, I hate confrontations and will only fight back when I had too much crap thrown at me which I do successfully most times. I think this is one of those situations where she has over stepped the line and keeps denying, hoping I dont know the whole story.

I do want to handle this whole thing with calm and dignity.

What makes this situation so complex is that I am not really all that nice either:

1. During our first year together she discovered (by snooping on my laptop) that I was living like a pick up artist before meeting her and during the first year together while with her. She found out that I also cheated badly on my EX GF many times which caused us to break up. I did some messed up things because I was still highly into PU when I met my current GF.
I should of been doing mLTRs and should have been honest with them all to avoid hurting anyone or lying. I was only honest with one girl that I saw on the side when I was with my EX GF and she was still hurting.


2. After 6 months together I cheated on her twice with a woman and she had to probe me many, many, many times before I finally cracked and told her everything about it. She spied on my computer (got my private messages, guys put passwords on ur PCs) and actually talked to that woman to get the whole story (that ***** (not my GF) even tried making it out that I was really into her which is not true at all. She has forgiven me for this one.
The main reason why I cheated on her was because I was jealous of her previous BF who was hassling her, calling dozen times a day and hassling her to meet him when he was staying in Boston from Italy. She stayed at his hotel during his stay because she said it was too late to go home... and thats when I flipped and ended going over and cheating with the other girl as I thought she was sleeping with her ex... which she said was not true... (I guess I had to take her word for it).

3. She has/had massive trust issues with me because of this for about 1 year after finding out I cheated on her. She was hurt and upset and rightfully so, but she chose to forgive me and stay with me.

4. She has been amazingly understanding about this whole PUA thing... she even read "the Game" and liked it. Even though she finds the whole PUA idea, stupid and nerdy. My GF modelled part time and can pretty much get any guy she likes.

I still do love her and respect her, while I feel frustrated, upset, hurt and humiliated and need closure.

She has given me the benefit of the doubt and i dont want to be the one who gets all cut up and angry and kicks her out at the first sign of infedility. I mean comon, half of the board here are cheaters.

While I strongly agree that cheating is an end to a perfect relationship, sometimes it can be overcome, however if it is continuing then there has to be an end put to this.

I think the main reasons why she is afraid to tell me the truth is that:

1. She likes the way she is living. I dont spoil her with freebies but I do treat her well and we try and go 50 50 with occasional entertainment provided solely by my wallet. So I guess I am a good provider.

2. She could possibly be scared how I will handle the situation based on our last chats about that guy. I flipped and made her cry and rightfully so. She doesnt like confrontations so she will look for the quiet way out.

3. She possibly feels that she has every right to cheat on me at least once because I have done so in the past. I just wonder if she will keep it quiet forever or will her guilty conscience eat her and she will crack soon. However, she likes to deny things and makes herself and her sister out to be like angels. Her sister also got divorced 1 year ago and has been partying it up.. so I can only assume she is trying to pull her into her partying ways.

4. She actually wants ME to end the relationship because she doesnt want to seem like a biatch and leave me like that.

I guess I can write here all day but thats what I need to consider prior doing anything.

And I think I will take your way out jgsf65!

I no longer care if we break up or stay together (I do love her but if she cant be honest with me then our relationship is based on lies and deceit and I cant handle that).

So what I will do is, approach her this weekend about it at some casual setting perhaps over a glass of wine. And just say,

"Look, I really think you should tell me one last time what actually was or is happening with that guy or any other guys for that matter".

"Heart to heart, and keep in mind that I know more than you think or realize."

If she keeps denying then, I will show her the print outs.

Then if she keeps denying saying its still not true then Ill just get up, say its over and leave, we only travel in one car so Ill just walk and let her drive where ever she chooses to.

However if she confesses then Ill listen to her and see what she has to say.
If she says she is into him, then Ill just end the relationship right then and there and ask her to move out. if she says that she did it because of my cheating past and that she is over that guy, then Ill give her the benefit of the doubt, forgive her but not forget, then screen her for the next year and see how she goes. I have a way into her PC so she cant hide much from me.
if I spot her cheating or remotely doing anything similar, she is out.
I know I may sound like a pu$$y but fuk it... ill give her a chance.

And the only way I would even remotely start considering to forgive her if she cancels her trip to Italy which is also based on lies as that guy is coming with her. If she still wants to go then she better have her stuff at another place when she comes back.

 

[CGE333]

Stop making excuses just do it and do it now so you can hold on to a little bit of your dignity. If you don't do this right, this woman is going to mess up your life for the next few years.

In my opinion there is no reason to confront her about the cheating, just calmly tell her (be the adult here) that things are not working out for you two and she must move out, give her a date that she has to be gone and that is that. Don't worry about sleeping with her anymore that will just prolong the agony and if you are half the PUA you talk about finding someone new to have sex with should not be too hard. Just make a clean break and in reality it sounds like 6-12 months down the line that both of you will be glad that this thing has ended.

 

[Lollita_Luvr]

Do this ---
You pack up all her stuff while she is at work and ship it in storage.
Then you book a two star motel room in her name for two days. Pay in advance (forget the money.. this will be fun ) and place the motel key and the storage key in an envelope. Write the addresses of both on the envelope.
When she arrives home, you tell her with a sly grin , " I have a big surprise for you, follow me in your car."
Take her to a coffee shop, get some lattes and talk casually for a bit.
SHe is saying all excitedly, " What is the surprise .. ??"
Finish your coffee, hand her the envelope,and say, " Here it is "

Get up and walk away as she is digesting the reality.

Then you ask yourself , "What would Charlie Sheen do next ?"

haha that would be fun but I dont have the heart to do that or the funds atm.