Tired Of Not Having Any Beautiful women In My Life (besides my mom and sister)

[Travel memoir21]

OP, it sounds you need better skills when it comes to connecting with people. I highly suggest you go out and read this book.

It teaches you the fundamentals and basics to build rapport and connection with anybody. You must ultimately have good intentions when it comes to approaching women and be willing to GIVE. Give some playful vibes and great aura by building a lifestyle that is great for yourself.


I also suggest before you go out and meet women you listen to late night talk show host interviews of guys like Jimmy Fallon, Jay Leno and Conan O Brien to put you in a social mood. That and also call up a friend and ask how he’s doing. Also do a little body calisthenics exercise like push ups, squats, stretches and burpees etc….then listen to some upbeat positive, uplifting music, then remember something that you are proud of yourself.

Get a wingman or a wingwoman if you can. Preparation is key.

 

[Clockwerk50]

My social circle is nonexistent
Besides women music is my main passion in life
My financial situation is wack
No, I haven't really thought about my USP, how would I communicate something like that to a lady?
Your wardrobe advice is legit but I like classic clothes too
Wait did AI write this post? This seems pretty well-written and formal

I use AI to fix my grammar. The concepts I generally talk about are through the logic of seduction/desire, experience, and theory. Nonetheless, it is difficult to point out what you are failing at since the reality is, we do not know what you are failing at. I would follow my advice and get a personality and find your USP. Musicians can get laid pretty easily. Maybe start there…

Try reading one of this books. Just pick one. It will help you tons.

Atomic Attraction - Christopher Canwell
Models - Mark Manson
How To Be a 3% Man - Corey Wayne

 

[corrector]

My social circle is nonexistent
Besides women music is my main passion in life
My financial situation is wack
No, I haven't really thought about my USP, how would I communicate something like that to a lady?
Your wardrobe advice is legit but I like classic clothes too
Wait did AI write this post? This seems pretty well-written and formal

What type of music do you like listening to? Having a bad financial situation in your 20s is terrible. While money can't buy love/women, you don't have the logistics (ie where would you even take a girl if you live at home). These things are like carrying a heavy weight, and I think subconciously you would want somethings to fail so you have an out where a woman won't go deeper into your set-up and end up rejecting you because you don't measure up. Maybe you are choosing to behave in ways that will get you to be kicked out of venues so you won't have to deal with that while at the same time having a checkbox you tried.

 

[BeExcellent]

So here is the issue OP, as I see.

You are trying to get to a place of abundance coming from a mindset of lack. You can't get there from where you are coming from. It's not possible. It would be like trying to drive from California to Hawaii. It's not happening.

Looking at it from an outside perspective, you want all the results from doing the right things now, but you haven't done any of the right things yet that gets you the results over time.

That's a problem. See the results don't just happen. The results are a byproduct over time of you putting in the work into yourself over and over and over again. And not because you want to get women, because you want to improve yourself. You ALWAYS should be doing this for YOU and YOU only. Everything else that comes along with it is a result of this.

Into working out and getting into shape. Into getting yourself right from a financial standpoint. Into getting yourself right from a mindset and mentality standpoint so that when you talk to women you are projecting confidence and fun and sexiness instead of whatever you seem to be projecting now which is scaring them away and making them so afraid they are kicking you out of places. Likely because you are angry and mad at them rejecting you.

But see...they aren't rejecting you. They are simply giving you valuable feedback and what that feedback should tell you is that you need to do the work if you want the results.

There will be no results without you doing the work first, and likely a lot of it.

What you are doing right now is akin to complaining you want a job and nobody will hire you but you are trying to apply for jobs you aren't qualified for yet. You want to be hired as a doctor without going to medical school and passing the medical boards. You want to become a lawyer without going to law school and passing the bar exam.

In no other place in life does what you are trying to do exist, so why would you think it exists with women?

Most of the time in life you don't get what you want, you get what you've earned. From what you posted, you haven't earned much, so if you want the results to change I would suggest changing what you earn.

The above is absolute truth and I cannot agree more strongly. Please read and re read the above.

If you have issues like ASD? Get evaluated and seek insight on how to better interact with people all around you (hint: it ain't all about you dude).

Get a good haircut, shave, get a fitness program going and find work to earn money. That is where your focus needs to be right now. Those are foundational building blocks for your life.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Even if you're Chad Thundercoq you're not getting many hot matches because there are simply so few on there.

I used to think that too, but from experience that's not true. I've refined a method that has me lining up one to four dates every weekend consistently with 8+. I hardly swipe at this point. But I would say I'm in the top 5-10%.

@ocho_da_musician
With that many approaches under your belt your game should be flawless. Your problem is you think a girl is a solution to your problems, and you're distracting yourself from the hard work by trying to pick up a girl. We all do it, but you need to recognize when to step back and grind. As others have mentioned, you're putting the cart before the horse. It's all just feedback, so listen to it, what's it telling you?

Think about it, what are you bringing to the table? You're broke, you're malnourished, you don't even have a spot where she can walk around naked. I mean why do you want a girl right now anyway? Your priority should always be coming up. When you hit a new level you'll know because people will treat you differently. Trust the process and get after it.

Your life is the sundae, the girl is the cherry on top. She's optional, she's a bonus, not the main goal. Get to the point where when a girl rejects you, you think "lol her loss" and move on without a second thought. There are four billion women on this planet, you will run into hot ones without trying, so just focus on networking, building an empire, getting fit, finding passionate hobbies, and over time you'll see easy lay up opportunities to capitalize on.

And for some direct advice with your approaches, just have conversations, don't even think about anything developing for now. Say something to break the ice and ask a random question about her or the situation. If she asks one back just enjoy the conversation, if she doesn't then move on with life. Most of all, only approach when you're out for something anyway. Going to a show and see a cute girl sitting next to you? Ask her about the show and have a friendly chat. In line at the store and see a cutie behind you, crack a joke and see if she smiles. No need to hunt women down, just see if the universe puts her next to you as you go after your goals.

Forget pulling these women, you aren't there, just enjoy their presence and learn to have fun chats. Take your time, what's the rush?

Lots of good stuff in this thread, take it all in and dig deeper. There's lots of good threads here where guys worse than you are helped.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Here are a couple of simple things you can do:

1. Loose the oversized white shirt. This ain't the 1930s industrial revolution. Get some solid color quality t shirts. Wear those. On your coloring: Dark grey/charcoal, navy, black, dark green. You want fitted. You are tall and not fat. Much better than being overweight, but the guys are right, you need to work out to develop your physique.

2. Your body language is off putting in your photo. You are standing in too wide a stance and grasping at your own arms like you are trying to hold yourself up and/or hide behind your arms.

3. Annie Leibovitz? Seriously? I assume that is a joke but if so it is both obtuse and insulting to her (were she to see it) because she'd never take such a photo (and as one of the most respected fashion photographers in the world, she would have had your wardrobe & body language on point.....) that comment alone does indicate issues with social calibration/appropriateness, which is a hallmark of the spectrum. At best its a rather odd/weird comment but my guess is most of the guys have no idea who Annie Liebovitz is, so the reference is likely lost on them.

4. You appear to see women as "hoes" instead of human beings. Stop. Like @EyeOnThePrize advised you need to be practicing having conversations with people around you.

Why are you in therapy? No need for a dissertation but give us a clue like "anxiety" or "anger management" or "depression". That helps to understand the mental states you are managing, which in turn can help us advise you.

Sorry for you losing your friend. If he was well intentioned and people find something odd or "off" about you, maybe your friend is correct. Get an eval to help you understand yourself better.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I remember getting kicked out of my local Walmart because people were claiming that I was harassing customers. Even bars and clubs have ejecting for apparently creeping people out. Guys, my intention is not to harass girls, it's to charm and seduce

So what aspects of your behavior did the staff find "harassing" and "creepy"?