legolas said:
I'm still having a hard time translating your "generalization" to experience for myself.
I'm wondering if you could explain this either with an exaple of a story or a dialogue, or something logical LOL that a guy could understand.
Think about what most guys talk about when they first meet a gal.
- Where are you from
- What do you do
- Nice weather we're having
- Did you hear about XYZ event on the news?
- You are really pretty!
ZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzz.... *snort* wha? oh....I'm sorry, I fell asleep while typing those questions.
Chicks have the same reaction when you don't engage their feelings.
In contrast, here are some random topics that do just that:
- First kiss
- Near Death Experience
- Funniest Memory
- Most embarrassing moment
- Life ambition/passion
- Favorite music/songs
Now we're talking! Women are suckers for juicy conversation and if you pry them open just right you will find that they will do most of the yapping. This is a good sign..it means you are doing something right.
Your job is to listen and push the conversation in different directions so the flow never gets stale. Don't be so eager to drag a topic to its conclusion..its too predictable. By covering a broad range of topics and feelings you not only stimulate her emotions, you also create the illusion of familiarity which makes her more comfortable.. you are already giving her excuses to hook up with you!
Here's a real kicker though...when you get good at expressing yourself, it doesnt matter what you talk about..even the weather can be sexy! You gotta crawl before you fly though.
I'm working in an environment full of young women, most of whome I'd like to befriend outside of work. I've had a hard time doing this over the past year. Ideally I'd like them to call me when they go out with their friends.
Boooooooooo!!!
Where's the fun in that? Your problem is that you don't know how to enjoy a challenge. It frightens you too much and fear will suck the fun out of anything.
Here's the deal though, I think in order for this to happen, I think I have to "provide" them with something in the friendship. In order for the friendship to work, I have to do my fair share, and then I can ask them for a favor (like introducing me to their friends)
You've got it all wrong. It's supposed to be you doing them and their friends a favor by showing up and introducing yourself
I'm realizing this, but I can't seem to figure out what to "provide" I don't want it to be entertainment like cracking jokes, and so on, I want it to be something else. Ultimately I want to be fun, but I'm struggling with figuring out what to do. Any hints?
LOL.. you just nailed your biggest issue. You think that this stuff has to be "figured out". What have I been saying all along? This is about emotions and energy, not logic and reason. Having good game is all about mental agility..how will you develop that if you pre-calculate your every move?
Here's a big hint for you: Women don't fantasize about bean-counters. They like wild and impulsive men who make them do things they normally wouldn't. You don't become that man over night. It takes a lot of exposure, trial/error and just going out for kicks before you find your own pimp stride.
Stop believing that you can rationalize your way to success