I never said that "its wrong" for men to cheat. I just laughed at OPs argument, not necessarily his idea. I generally have a problem with absolutes such as "I'm 100% certain that ALL men cheat". when u build a argument on that i can not give it credence. I mean how can he be 100% certain. Nobody's that certain!Miles28 said:Julius,
I agree with you but of course this comes down to a matter of personal views. On this level guys like FlGuy and game.r are entitled to say that 'it's wrong' for men or women to cheat. To them I say fine, go ahead and live a faithful and extremely frustrating life.
The only problem is that the proportion of 'men' like FlGuy and game.r is SO high in our society that now women expect men not to cheat, which I find incredible. Because generally women now have this insane expectation it's going to be extremely hard to find women who can look past this brainwashing and see that, actually, as long as a man is coming home to her every night, putting food on the table and generally being a good and caring husband, him occasionally needing to go out for some strange isn't the worst thing in the world.
If women could be a bit more realistic about what to expect then it wouldn't be necessary to 'cheat' at all (because as far as I'm concerned 'cheating' describes the deception rather than the lack of adherence to monogamy). There would just be a complicit understanding between the couple that occasionally the man would stray.
As some posters have said the real problem comes when emotions are involved. This is far more likely to happen when women are the ones doing the cheating, which is why it's better for women not to cheat. Of course the same thing can happen to men and so having sex outside of a marriage still requires considerable discipline on the part of the man, either not to get emotionally involved with the woman that he's sleeping with on the side or to successfully compartmentalise that woman (or those women). I think this is relatively easy to do for men who have a realistic view of things. The only men that are likely to be tortured are those that belive that a man should only be with one woman at any particular time and therefore if he develops feelings for a woman other than his wife he somehow has to choose between the two women. No choice is necessary, the wife stays the wife and the lover stays the lover. No inner torment necessary.
carry on... i have nothing else to say.