The So suave Challenge

Ofus

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Originally posted by xblitz44x
Believe it or not, she's not angry. She's trying to wake people up. If you guys stopped to listen to what she's saying (and had patience to get through some of her flames) you'd see that she's willing to help you understand yourself and why you're attracted to people and experiences. I'll admit that she comes across as hardcore and rough sometimes, but just try to understand that she's trying to convince an entire board something that they don't want to hear. Try to look into what she's saying, it might change you.

-Blitz
Ok, whatever you say Destin... I mean blitz *wink wink nudge nudge*
 

xblitz44x

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heh : ) funny. Nah but seriously, I learned a lot from her and it's helped me out a lot. I'm trying to get other guys to open up their minds to it as well. I wouldn't be saying it if I didn't think it would benefit them.
 

icepick

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Lotta Werdz!

Just read the post.

Holy fukk! That destini is verbose!

Anyway, it seems like this chick is stating what can be found elsewhere. Of course the WAY that she writes is so god awful LONG! With all the crazy metaphors, and the new age spiritually talk, the meaning gets a little overshadowed by all of this.

Some of it is right on, some of it is just conjecture.

I think she is right about the whole projection thing though. We do see the girl that we are infatuated with as being able to get rid of all of our faults, and by doing that, we then become accutely aware of them.

I don't think it is entirely correct though (Jung was a little too quick to generalize based on broad assumptions) it is (somewhat?) interesting.
 
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Ofus

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Keep in mind when you read advice from 'Destiny' or from anyone with seducingwomen101.com in their sig; Destiny is on some kind of jihad against sosuave and pickup boards in general.

Check out what she thinks of us and the Don Juan Center (from seducingwomen101.com):

Nice site, amusing forum, extensive collection of articles and advice from the guys at So Suave, which is predominantly appealing to the immature boys who just escaped puberty - high schoolers and college frosh, with absolutely juvenile, penile, and some rather severe Oedipal issues. The articles give the most fundamentally flawed advice about women, about being confident, about an entire life paradigm, basically. The only worthy articles are those "quoted" by more famous authors. The "don juan" articles are disturbing in their ignorance and their arrogance. One would assume the owners of the site were grown and would have a little more consciousness about what they peddle to young people, but I have a feeling the So Suave boys are just exactly that. Boys.

Most of them are well intended and genuinely wanting to learn, but they've long since bought into the SS mentality, and therefore brainwashed one another to completely come unglued when challenged. But it's free, so...
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

-Zero_h0uR-

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Well...

I guess you can't please everyone.

I think that Destiny (and everyone from seducingwomen101.com) has every right to come here and to disagree with the things we're taught. Why not? There are plenty of opinions that float around this board, some right, others wrong.

It's obvious that most of the "Don Juan Bible's" rules are simply guidelines for beginners. They are not rules set in stone. They are there to change your mindset. The truly successful men are the ones who adapt the rules and styles to themselves, they do not only what is comfortable, but what works.

I have read through some of the Seducing Women 101 website, and sure, there are things there that make sense. The bottom line is:

Do what works. If you think the articles and advice from sosuave.com work, use them. If you think that SW101 works, use their advice.

However, don't knock people simply for trying to better themselves. That's childish and shows true ignorance.

The best way to learn is from experience. Not only from personal successes, but also from personal failures.


-- Zero-
 

Ninja Dude

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Hey Destini,

I found your post to be very enlightening but would like to make a helpful suggestion. You should take a creative writing course to hone your skills. Your ideas are great but the way you present them is very cumbersome and not fun to read. I got a headache getting through them and had to take short breaks!

Think more "essay" and less "rant". Write up an outline of the major points you want to make and then support them with info/metaphors/etc
 

Boricua_33015

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YES NINJA DUDE IS DAMN RIGHT! Seriously Destini I am interested in what you have to say. Im not disagreeing with sosuaves articles either but I am openminded enough to read your sh1t so I can have some thoughts about it.
 

Marquez

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Destini, you confused little girl.

What she wants us to know is quite simple, actually:

1. Embrace your sexuality, be a man
2. Embrace life (connected to 1.)
3. Be yourself (connected to 1. & 2.)
4. Men and women have fundamentally different energies/sexualities/whatever you wanna call it, which are in opposition, thus attracting each other like magnets :p
5. Nature (evolution/destiny/destini...) made it so, we are here to enjoy it
 

murid

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Hello guys, my first post after lurking for God knows how many months...

What I find most amusing are the rather rabid reactions of certain posters who are,

Mr. Mystery and a few others were able to engage her in a mature and smooth dialog. Frankly, still, a good deal of the verbage spewed forth on this thread reads like little boy circle jerk dialogs.

If the lady sounds like a bitter old bird, hell more than half of the
guys posting on this thread sound thrice as bitter, and thrice more
clueless still.

Destini pushes Jung as fact, now Jung's theories have their currency,
academia has NOT passed him by in favor of a "more scientific" social
biology, but his ideas are still theories, in competition with many
others in a marketplace of ideas. People who push many of the theories
and findings within Social Biology as absolute fact are also deluded. We
have a marketplace of ideas and fields of thought in constant churn.

Some of her basic ideas on human interaction, even on polarity, stripped
of any reference to metaphysical or spiritual topics, and stripped of
references to Jungian ideas on archetypes, the animus/anima, and so on,
are rather obvious. At least I find them so.

A woman might finds you attractive as an AFC as well as an experienced
player. The fact that she might not lay you as an AFC may be due to your
AFC'ish tendencies ****ing up what was already a given, that she would
eventually lay you given the chance. A bit of self reflection is
helpful for all of us.

When I honestly look into my life I realize that there were times, MANY
times, during the whole time that I was a bumbling Peter Parker AFC
Nerd, in which truly Hot HB's were into me and would have boinked my
sweet nice guy brains out, I blew such chances either by not recognizing
them (hindsight is a wonderful thing) or by recognizing them but
allowing my social ineptitude blow the situation. Or my lack of
confidence. "Gee is she really sending me signals or is she just toying
with me? She's dry humping me in public and pressing her titties into my
side and gazing at me with a mixed look of frusteration and desire, but
naaw.... can't be...."

(Murid slaps his forehead)

This happened to all of us, you, we. At least once or twice, perhaps
(probably) FAR more often. The missed signals and "indicators of
interest". How many men go through high school utterly dense and
convinced of their lack of worth? And how many rather comely lasses
would have still boinked you given the chance had you allowed her the
chance in?

So we are adults now, and we know a bit better. And many guys are
getting out there, law of averages, its not the patterns working, its
the fact that many of us have been talking to far more women than ever
before, AND the fact that we are cultivating a sensitivity to HER
SIGNALS indicating her interest.

To this degree many of the DJ materials here are helpful in teaching
guys with poor social skills and poor self esteem what are really
somewhat basic but VERY essential social skills. Destini9 and Mr.
Mystery's points on confidence are key, if you KNOW that you know you
are assured. Knowledge is power, knowing how to conduct a conversation
and then GETTING OUT THERE and doing it, enough times, gives experience
and makes theoretical knowledge manifest. Thus we become confident.
NEXT, this site, more than other forums (like fastseduction...) really
has some posters who are INTO conscious self development, people trying
to evolve their innate masculinity. Their posts help many

I wish Destini9 would recognize this. But frankly does it matter? She put it bluntly, a look of things are
really a matter of our growing up.

Marla would have ****ed Ed Norton's character OR Brad Pitt's, she was
fundamentally attracted to the nut ball (and he to her in his twisted
mind) indeed, she DID screw him, she had no idea she was ****ing Tyler.

Remember the Ugly Iranian from Hell story? This happens all the time,
the guy was masculine, he Got out there, law of averages, something
about him was attractive to some of the women he interacted with to the
point that they at least let him in the door. It doesn't matter if you
don't think that ugly dude X is attractive, and he knows no "player
skills" he still manages to get laid, often in some cases. WHY ? Because
we are not inside of a HB's sweet head and we really have no idea what
she finds attractive across the board, or repulsive. And he has guts and
does his thing, reads her signals, sends her his signals, if she finds
him a bit attractive and he piques her interests and the situation is
right BAM, otherwise repeat cycle, Next. He's a man, in touch with his masculinity.

As Destini pointed out, masculinity is what turns women on,
male dominance, the essence of being a Man, being The Man.

Her statements on psychology can be, and should be, separated from her
statements on metaphysics or the Astral plane or whatever. Frankly, a
good deal of what she wrote on attraction is right on the nose. She
keeps referring to this site as an SS site, which its not, but Ross's
crap have some currency here, Ross and the various "seduction" schemes
he spawned are respected, or at least tolerated, here.

Frankly I'd rather throw a few drinks down and argue with Destiny than
Ross, frankly Destiny's a lot more respectable than Ross, or SS. There
are fundamental assumptions shared by SS advocates with people
interested in seduction who (wisely) avoid the whole SS ball of wax. The
assumptions, and not Jefferies theman, deserve critique.

In a marketplace of ideas I need not get my pants in a bundle because
the lady argues like a sailor, hell it shows that she has balls (in a
feminine manner :), at least she's not some frail wallflower. Her ideas
have substance, even the ones I disagree with, and deserve
consideration. Marquez dismisses her as a confused little girl, frankly,
and no offense, Marquez's dismissals were smoother than some of the
other boyish crap floating around in this thread. Still I think that
he's not getting it.

It would HELP if Destini9 took the solid science and solid matters, such
as fundamentals of polarity, the basics of human attraction minus
references to Jungian archetypes, and put this in one category, next if
she took the Jungian psychology that relates to her argument, covered
this separately, and then related the two, and LASTLY for those
interested, if she took her Spiritual or metaphysical ideas, dealt with
them separately but tying them into the previous two categories. She
presents everything as self-evident Fact, when there are self evident
facts mixed with solid theories mixed with more debatable theories mixed
with what really are, to be polite, subjective INNER experiences. Inner
growth is by its nature a subjective experience.

Yeah, all compartmentalized, just like a male :)
 

FlyGuy

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My problems with Destini's theories:

1)she bases her theories off of unproven psychology (cool stuff, but still theoretical), her OWN interpretations of them, and some questionable metaphysics

2)she disregards two of the most powerful forces in attraction: genetics and social contract
 

jive

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Originally posted by Marquez
Destini, you confused little girl.

What she wants us to know is quite simple, actually:

1. Embrace your sexuality, be a man
2. Embrace life (connected to 1.)
3. Be yourself (connected to 1. & 2.)
4. Men and women have fundamentally different energies/sexualities/whatever you wanna call it, which are in opposition, thus attracting each other like magnets :p
5. Nature (evolution/destiny/destini...) made it so, we are here to enjoy it
Wow dude you just saved me like 2 hours of reading. :) Well I did try to read it but now I actually know what she's talking about.
 

krd

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If that summary of destini's viewpoints are indeed correct, then they aren't terribly different from what is offered here. Apart from the "Be Yourself" philosophy, which should be differentiated from the DJ's "Be the best self you can be".

But what exactly is she trying to say? What is she criticizing? No doubt, a lot of the threads need to be taken with a grain of salt; some people know what they are talking about, while others don't. I try to stay open to new concepts and ideas, and I feel that there is no definite right or wrong way to do things. Perhaps what destini is trying to say could be right on. But there is so much information packed into all of the posts on this thread, that it's very difficult for the average person to wrap their head around, plus a lot of unfamiliar terminology and concepts; it's easy to throw the baby out with the bathwater while reading all of it. I believe that is why much of what she says is being misinterpreted.

So then, what specifically are us DJ's doing wrong? What should we be doing instead? Is she telling us we should all subscribe to her website (I assume this is part of it). I'm actually compelled to try that "stand a few feet away frim her without saying anything" routine and see if it works. If it doesn't, this can mean one of two things (or both). Either that exercise is useless, or I'm not in touch with my AI. (I think I'll pass on the weird T-shirt idea though. By the way, destini, would these things work outside of a bar or club situation?)

But I think a brief summary of this vast amount of information, or some concrete examples of how to put this information to use would be a bigger help to us DJ's, rather than arguing back and forth about what is confidence, what is attraction, what is AI, how nobody knows what they are talking about, how everyone is missing the point--because this thread is going to end up going on forever (in fact I think it already has).
 
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