The Secret of the Jerk

Lone_raider

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Wow! That was an inspiring post, Just genius.
 

Bungo Pony

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I don't have time to read this. I have 3 dates to get ready for


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"Feelin' sleazy dirty,
Feelin' kinda mean,
Feelin' up, down & in-between,
Feelin' kinda ****y
Feel I'm on the rise,
Feel myself a-coming between your thighs" - Jackyl
 

MattB

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Pook: I am being alot more confident than my AFC days(I can any approach any girls without giving a damn), and I dont have desperation over any girls.

Why then, am I still doing mesribly in my "dating career" ? I just dont understand..
 

anakin

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Pook, congratulations on a nice post!

I remember you saying a while back, about a year ago in fact, that you were once a nice guy, but that you took steps to "purge" the nice guy from you!

My question, should you choose to answer, is what steps must one take and how does one purge the 'Nice Guyíus Maximus' out of their system to be that great guy that many aspire to be??


ANAKIN
 

CaliMike

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Thanks Pook. Quality information explained clearly, as always.

Constant rejection requires one of two solutions: either lower your standards or increase your standards in yourself.
Extremely powerful and true statement. It also clarifies that the information that can be learned from the DJ methodology is applicable to All aspects of life.
 

Never try to read a woman's mind. It is a scary place. Ignore her confusing signals and mixed messages. Assume she is interested in you and act accordingly.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

SexPDX

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Good post, Pook. You are very correct, to hook up with women requires that you don't resist your masculinity and you let nature do it's work. I disgree however that aquiring seduction knowledge is an attempt to replace the model nature hands us, it is only a way of influencing the natural process so that we are no longer as limited by it as we once were.

Pook, I have asked you this before, but he haven't managed to discuss it yet. I have some sticking points in my game I would be interested in what you would have to say about.

My current situation is that I get mostly 6-8's, I want to move to 9's to 10's. Since part of learning to get what you want is to stop going for what you no longer want, I normally refrain from going for a lot of girls I could easily get and instead wait untill I find a target I am very much attracted to who may present something of a challenge. If I go a certain amount of time with no succes with the 9's and 10's (2-4 months seems to be the normal time window) I unleash the beast go on a fvck rampage where I, like you suggest, submit to the will of nature. I don't resist it, I just let it happen. I do use some verbal seduction on the girls I do this with but it's much more autopilot driven. Why? Because sarging 6-8's is a situation I have more experience with and I am therefore better at it, not because of some grand natural order that dictates that 6-8's are what I get. Since 9-10's require a much different approach from a woman who ain't all that hot, I am not doing as well with them because I am less experienced with the technique. If I were to "surrender to the will of nature" in this way all the time, would my situation change? I don't see that it would.

My point is why should we necessarily be happy with what nature hands us? Why not test it's limits in the name of getting what we want? I really am hard pressed to believe that the reason I am not consistently fvcking 9's and 10's is that I have yet to fully give in to the will of nature.

Getting 9's and 10's requires different skills and for me, these are the rough spots: finding the chicks is hard, there seem to be particularly few 9's and 10's where I live; meeting them can be harder because they are normally positioned in situations where they are more diffcult to meet, for example in groups where they are cornered by AMOG's or their entourage of chumps; they MAY be more difficult to attract but often times it's not harder only DIFFERENT. Making group approaches, entering their social circles in well-orchestrated ways, disarming obstacles, avoiding/dealing with angry husbands/boyfriends, these are all things that require a lot of poise and theatrics and to get experience on a large scale is required to be any good at this and even FINDING these chicks is hard for me right now before ANY of this happens. I think about the LAST thing I need to do under these conditions with the goals I have is to just let nature take it's course.

I understand you may reply to me and say that I am focusing too much on this but to me that dodges the issue. I feel that that way of thinking seduces guys into the belief that they can deal with the issue without ACTUALLY dealing with it.

Maybe, however, you and I are ill-equipped to learn from each other. My life is about pleasure. I understand this about myself and I am not likely to change. Sometimes I feel as though I want to, but I only want to change JUST BADLY ENOUGH that it makes for a fvcking great little "woe is me" act about my desire to change and my inability to do so for when some chick calls me out on what a sleazebag I am. A very genuine performance.

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"Dare to aim high." ~ DeepBlue

"Embrace the unknown." ~ Mystery

"Every human being has so much to offer, it's whether they are willing to give it that makes or breaks their relationship with me." ~ Gunwitch

"All you can do is make sure that YOUR game is tight and your skills are intact. Be prepared for anything and play YOUR game at all times, right down the line." ~ MrSex4uNYC

"Capture and lead her imagination and she will not resist you." ~ Ross Jeffries



[This message has been edited by SexPDX (edited 11-22-2002).]
 

RDtoo

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As usual, Pook is light years ahead of everyone else. This should not only be in the DJ Bible, it should BE the DJ Bible.
 

Inspector Clouseau

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Pook, seeing you both read Weiniger and once even posted Book of Wife, co-written by Kevin Solway, I see we both have been to the same obscure website, Solway's The Thinking Man's Minefield. What a gem.

The main failing point I found with seduction is that it's unnecessary. I was trying it, with struggle and occasional moderate successes, and then I shaved my head. Life has been different, as night is to day, at times very bizarre; like times when women will literally not stop staring at me until I look, women who won't stop complimenting me, whole groups of women who each and every one individually say 'bye' to me, or most bizarre, women coming up to me telling me "You look like you are angry" and then proceed to dance with me. Not to say shaving my head, from a head prematurely going bald, was the first change I made, but it was the last needed ingredient in order to complete the 'mix'. I've come to the conclusion women are either interested or they are not, they are already turned on by your sexuality or they are not.

One must take with skepticism what women say of their dating desires: on the one hand, women say they want romance and the slow route, yet on the other hand they complain when guys put up the facade and really only wanted sex; yet on the one hand women complain of those romantic facades, yet on the other hand complain of guys who are direct in their sexuality, those alleged sleazebag "pigs".

It does all boil down to embracing your sexuality and being a man, which are related. When a man embraces his sexuality, he eventually becomes it. His thoughts gradually change, his wardrobe gradually changes, his appearance gradually changes, his behaviors gradually change; all towards sexual. Combined with finding striking balance between "nice guy" and "jerk", he comes to a point where all labels are cast off and he just "is". I just "am".

Another failing point I found with seduction is that by studying and implementing seduction in general; for I went through "Student Syndrome", soaking up all the information I could; I was trying to play someone else's game, someone else's life. I don't have their personality, I don't have their appearance. Whomever you read from, they learned themselves what works and what doesn't, from triumph and failure, and by following their techniques and game plans, piggy backing their success, you are only a mere imitation. Where's the fun in that, where's the fun in already knowing everything at the beginning of the Game?

It's best fun when things "just happen". Of course things really didn't "just happen", your sexuality influences your environment.

Before my final step of shaving the head, I thought my appearing desireless was working. I was blinded by the illusion of "success", of women being more receptive to interacting with me; I confused increased female attention with the power of attraction. No wonder why hot women were more receptive, I was sanitizing myself! I realized the blunder when, armed with the new look, I can do the same things with women, even more, without turning them off, even escalating interest, without the need of appearing desireless. The difference, naturally, was while women weren't interested in me, they are now.

There are those, even Doc Love, who say it's rare for a woman to have high interest right off the bat. Not if you are a sexy guy. (Apparently there's a difference between being hot and being sexy. Women don't think Vin Diesel is hot, but they agree he's incredibly sexy. He has embraced himself). To say otherwise is to say guys are rarely highly interested in sexy chicks... you've got to be kidding me!

In all of this, one bizarre thing I noticed, even before the ultimate haircut, was the following: in terms of establishing good eye contact with women/interactions with women, I'd get the most from hot women, moderate from average women, and ugly women wouldn't give me the time of day; this, while I still visually looked like a chump. Truth be told, this began after I began embracing my sexuality.
 

MrSandman

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With posts like this, who needs a message board. I'm offically out...goodluck guys.
 

Jester

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fan-freakin'-tastic

This post basically established proof for the DJ persona and helps explain why things work the way they do.

Man, that kicked ass. Im not leaving the board tho, i like it here, helpng others with diverse problems keeps me fine tuned.
 

Wolf in sheep's clothing

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Yeah, I have to totally agree - whats up with fruitcake?

Of course, there has to be more to all this Don Juaning than just me doing 100 push-ups a day, acting tough and waving my crutch at women now and then. What about the psyche of WOMAN? Is there not something there to be learnt as well?

I am not advocating focusing my life to the persuit of women, but there is definite room for discussion in this area of how to handle women, and much to be understood. Attracting a woman with my manliness all very good and fine, but how much will it help me in keeping her?

Can I have my fruitcake and eat it?

As for your post, Pook, nice bit of writing, that.


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"Step aside everyone! Sensitive love letters are my specialty. 'Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.'" - Homer J. Simpson

"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house." - Steven Seagal


[This message has been edited by Wolf in sheep's clothing (edited 11-26-2002).]
 

Italiano

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"Increase my killing power aye" (Homer Simpson) I think i'm going to print this out and read it everyday.

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@~~~~~~
 

CyranoDeBergerac

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Dammit! I knew one of these days he'd actually post the meaning of life.

All kidding aside, further articulation would likely just be guilding the Lily. That being the case, I'll just say this and leave...

I will not congratulate Pook on another great post as one need not be commended for being himself. What I will commend Pook on is finding a way to inspire several members of this board to actually leave. A truly Herculean feat, inspiring others to go out and sieze life, as this is all you have ever advocated. Therein lies your accomplishment. Truly admirable Job Pook...

Seeing as your posts only seem to get better, I shall join De La Soul in eagerly awaiting your "Fruitcake" thread.


-CyranoDeBergerac
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

Cesare Cardinali

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Pook,

Excellent post my man. Thanks for clearing up that whole Dionysian vs. Apollo thing a little further. I really thought that career success was a good measure of whether you're on the Apollo path.

I find it comical that a couple of people read your post and decided to ditch sosuave.com given that you said "its time to stop studying all this seduction litterature like an academic degree". I think they failed to realize that you were not refering to this site at all but to the SS materials that you mention as a waste of time given that they require too much focus on the woman. These poor fools ended up ditching this site when really they missed the point entirely. They would have done well had they remembered the following age old motherly advice: "Would you jump off a bridge because Pook said so?".


I have a couple of questions that I hope you could address:

1. What if a man does not look like a typical testosterone charged male (for example short guys with small or medium builds)? Would it still be possible for him to attract hot women simply be embracing his testosterone? These guys can work out and stop analysing as you recommend, however, they still will never look like the 6 foot tall genetically gifted football player. And at best their attitude can transform into a super testosteronized male, but won't they just end up like a little Napoleon clone? I doubt this could attract quality women. What are your thoughts on this?

2.Your post seems to validate something that I argued in one of my posts regarding LTR Vs. STR, which is that the LTR has more potential to swallow you up and lead you down the Dionysian path than the ONS or STR does. You mention that as men get married their testosterone levels go down and that highly testosteronized men simply suck at marriage. Is this an indication that in order to be in an LTR a man has to accept that it will have the potential to stunt his personal and professional development?

3. Could you please offer more specific steps on how we could use the philosophy of embracing our testosterone to bang hot women without reverting to unusual seduction techniques or AFC tendencies (i.e. if you fully embrace your testosterone and make tons of money in business, you'll probably be able to bang tons of women simply because of your status and by the cash you can spend on the women...but this would seem like an AFC approach to me). Perhaps an example would help clarify how a testosteronized male would go about the task of attracting and seducing women.

4. How would you explain the fact that many testosteronized males simply suck at dealing with women and are really just AFCs? This is something that I do worry about because I'm pretty successful in most areas of my life but had many bad relationship experiences and I have been unable to transfer my career success into relationship success. For example, if I look at Napoleon or Caesar or Arthur Miller or myself...
. These guys seemed like "great men" yet they were all ruined by their inability to handle a particular woman. How would guys like this go about embracing their testosterone even more? How much more could they embrace?

5. This is a more personal question which I doubt you'll answer but I'll go for it anyway. Do you ever get worried that by adamently refusing to change anything in your approach or communication in order to bring the focus on the woman (and by being too much of a testosteronized man), that you'll end up NEXTing women that would perhaps bring pleasure to your life? For example, I noticed in one of your posts that you wrote that women are too slutty these days and that you'll never hear about a knight in shining armor risked his life to save a slut in distress. (I actually laughed my head off when I read that, although I totally agree that women are way too slutty these days). I guess the point I'm getting at is the following: Are your standards in a woman too high that you worry that you may end up missing out on tons of little hotties that could easily be yours if you just tossed some game at them?

Anyways, take care and I look forward to reading your reply.

Cheers,

Cesare Cardinali
 

Pook

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Cesare,

I always found when I set out on my own designs and philosophies, Nature would comically pull the rug out from under me lofty ideals (comically to everyone else, to me it was pain, hard pain). So ever since I came to this website I realized that Nature has a system in place. Rather than buck the system in pain, we should understand it and use it optimally for joy and happiness.

All my posts are usually in that theme. What is nature's system? How do we utilize it in regards to ourselves?

That is what this thread is as well. Why do these jerks (including ugly guys here) get these sensational babes? Our lovely female posters say, "It is because those girls have low self-esteem." But this doesn't seem true to all of them. It doesn't answer the question.

Looking at it, it was easy to see that jerks obviously did not hide their sexuality. But that still doesn't explain it.

The key was when I noticed the changes of people who inject testosterone. They literally went from Nice Guy to Jerk. The effects that testosterone brought (in both the postive effects like action, confidence, and negative effects like rudeness, unwilling to contemplate/introvert) matched the jerk's qualities incredibly.

The post was like a wordy scientific method. First, the problem was stated: Why hot girls end up with ugly/ jerks. Then, the hypothesis was an 'extreme masculinity' fueled by testosterone. The 'evidence' was in what the 'scientist' said, even what the 'farmer' said, along with all the women and men quotes about jerks. It all seemed to fit. The post ended with some ideas to utilize it but it is still a big question mark.

It lets me look at issues differently. Take the big musclar man that women are falling over. Why are they falling over? Experts are trotted out and they say, almost in lock step: "Women like big muscles because they want to feel protected. Back in the cave man days, women needed protection from blah blah blah..." It is the same explanation we hear over and over. I've never found it to be helpful in any utilization methods.

Of course women want to feel secured. Who doesn't? But these women go for highly unstable guys. So 'security' cannot be their top priority. But what if there is another possibility for an answer than the typical 'evolution/caveman days' scenario'?

One of testosterone's primary jobs is muscle growth (by directly stimulating protein synthesis). It helps burn fat and defines sexual characteristics. Women also make testosterone but not as much as men.

So when a woman sees Mr. Muscle Man, is she getting turned on by the blossom of testosterone that the muscles are merely symbols for? She doesn't know or care; she just knows she likes it.

Women with a lot of muscles... I am not attracted to them. I don't think many guys here are if any. I like my girls thin to medium build. A muscular woman (I'm talking pumped) I find unfeminine. Could it be because my unconscious attraction notices the 'increased testosterone' in her and says 'no'?

Lack of testosterone leads to muscle loss, fat gain, overall weakness, and depression, all traits women abhor and shun.

All the traits that women are supposed to love: confidence, action, happiness, muscles, all have the same root: testosterone.

Apparently, three things seem to raise testosterone levels: diet, exercise, and sleep. I used to be a skinny toothpick boy. Doing something as simple (but actually quite difficult to be consistant about it) as changing my diet really altered how women started viewing me (they oddly became more interested in me). Exercising, of course, increases attraction. The sleep is important so far as to recharge your body. Whenever I had lack of sleep, I had serious problems getting girls. When I am well rested, it is much much easier.

As strange as it may sound, changing my diet really did help my game. I'm no longer toothpick boy that I used to be.

"That is the change, Pook. You lost your skinniness." No. That is merely the effect. The CAUSE was the increased level of testosterone (which the change in diet helped raise). And the effects are not merely physical. I feel happier, more alive, more outgoing than I ever have.

That is why I posted clips of Anthony Ellis's interview at the end. After he went from skinny boy to He-Man, he felt attitude changes like 'increased confidence', 'outgoingness', 'happiness', 'ambition', 'lack of depression', all traits that have been the constellation we always strove for.

I see guys in the gym who work out everyday (yes, work out the same muscles too). They obviously aren't going to get bigger by working the same exact muscles every time (you have to give them some time to rest and grow). But they do it because they feel a rush. They exit the gym feeling more confidant, happier, etc. I bet it is the elevated testosterone levels.

I don't know what you are talking about with testosteronized guys being AFCs with women. Testosteronized guys are anything but AFC. An AFC has no sexuality, little testosterone. Nice Guys are testosterone deficient.

Testosteronized male is NOT Macho Guy. Skinny guys can be testosteronized, expressing it in different manners.

Short guys do have a problem with the height factor that women love (women love taller guys). But they can manage just fine. Also, there are short girls (and it has always seemed to me that the shorter girls are always cuter. Dunno why.)

As I raise my own testosterone levels, I am noticing that the women attracted to Pook keep on getting more and more beautiful. I can't believe it. (Notice that I said attracted. You can get the beautiful babe without it. But as far as attraction goes, the prettier girls place their lust for the more tesosteronized guys.
 
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There is no doubt that this is an impressive post, anyone who says otherwise would be mistaken. However one little point came to my attention. If pook is so successful with women, who has a great social life and is focused on all life goals, why does he have the time to write so many 10,000 word essays and write 245 medium-long posts?
 

prosemont

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I'll keep this really short.

While I agree that testosterone and masculinity are important in attracting women, they cannot do it alone.

That is why you see many gorilla-type guys beating their chests to no avail while the suave guys get the girl.

Why? Skills. Certainly the effeminate man with lots of skills will not get the girl, but also, the masculine guy with no skills will not get her either.

The masculine guy needs to work on his skills with women and people in general. It's about understanding people, really.

In short, even the masculine guy needs the skills to attract and seduce women.

You, Pook, may have the skills but were lacking the masculinity, hence your post.

I can assure you that the numbers are greater where men are masculine but lack the necessary skills. I am one of the latter.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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