The OP is absolutely correct when it comes to OLD. So many of you limit yourselves because you take too narrow a view.
I wish I could show you guys a picture of me and my fiancé. She is stunningly beautiful, looks 25 years younger than she is, and has a character that shines through even in pictures. I landed her through OLD.
I, on the other hand, am different. Some people need to be seen in 3 dimensions to be appreciated. I come across absolutely atrociously in pictures. There’s something about the reduction of a dimension that makes some people look bad.
To combat this, a man simply has to take more pictures until a few good ones appear. It might be a ratio of 50 bad ones to 1 good one.
Let’s say you finally come up with 2 or three pictures that are flattering to you. Post those along with a well thought-out profile that is specifically designed to eliminate women you don’t want, and attract the ones you want. You will come across as discriminating and in a position to choose, which is exactly how you should be anyway.
“But Uncle Atom, if I charm her with my initial writing and phone calls, when we finally meet she is bound to be disappointed with my looks.”
She might be, young grasshopper, but that’s where your personality comes in to play to correct this temporary dip in attraction level.
Here’s what will happen if she is disappointed in your real looks as compared to your ideal pictures: You will charm her with your personality, confidence, boldness, and body language. What will happen in her brain is that she will start to see you as that guy in the idealized pictures. She knows that you CAN look good, so she will view you in that idealized way.
What so many men fail to realize is that women’s perceptions are highly malleable. You can compensate for a shortfall in one area by excelling in another, and her brain will average out those qualities. If you’ve got a great personality, she will definitely make that mental adjustment to idealize your looks according to your pictures.
I recommend that you all cease to completely write off OLD, and instead create a quality, well thought-out profile (show that you have values, character and substance), find or create those 2 pictures out of 100, post them on an OLD site and then WAIT. Don’t approach women at all. Let them come to you. That’s what I did. I wrote a great profile (it took several days), found a couple of flattering pictures out of my many horrible ones, posted it all and went about my business.
Over the course of a few months, some extremely attractive women with great profiles contacted me. One of them stood out way above the others, and she eventually became my fiancé. And let me tell you guys... I am extraordinarily picky.
Zero sh!t tests, zero drama. Just support and affection and a desire to serve me.
Now you guys must be picturing your Uncle Atom as pretty ugly at this point. I would rate myself a 7 or 7.5, while my pictures bring me down to a 4 or 5 lol. The camera hates me. I do have an exceptionally young look which aids me tremendously.
So don’t use looks as an excuse. As I mentioned, even if you disappoint her when you meet her, you must understand that women will average out your qualities and soften the spikes and dips on her inner SMV chart.
Again, I’m addressing guys who are looking for a relationship. If you’re looking to smash and dash, then of course looks is paramount. If you’re looking for an attractive woman of character, try my formula. What have you got to lose? Your profile is floating out there like bait. Wait for the nibbles. They will come. What you will end up with is a small number of quality women to choose from. Don’t go for quantity. Go for quality. Filter out, exclude as many unqualified women as you can with your profile. The quality women who respond to your profile will regard looks as only part of the picture, and will definitely imagine you to look better than you actually do once her inner SMV adjustments kick in.
My fiancé keeps calling me “My Beautiful _Name_”. Insert my real name there. I’m ok looking objectively speaking, but to her I’m quite the prize looks-wise because I was able to average her view of me to a higher level based upon my many other qualities.
The takeaway: Women’s perceptions of looks are malleable and can be positively influenced by displaying a high level of character. The temporary dip in her attraction level when she first meets you (if you’re not that great-looking) can be neutralized if you know what you’re doing.
The most powerful influence on a woman is a man’s perception of himself. Women will believe about you that which you believe about yourself.
