The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[yonggg]

thanks for the encouragement.

yea i will absolutely stick with nc,
few years back i was able to get over wih my first love by nc after almost a year tried to convince her, and havent able to moved on for about 3 years.
and since then o felt so great, as u said i got my self respect, and everything went well, and has zero feeling to her.

in this case i will stick with nc, but i just wonder should i tell her that i cant be friend bla bla etc then start nc again, because after breakup i immediately drop the face of the earth

 

[thatmanvan]

Hi Guys,

Stumbled my way to this post after googling advice to get over my ex.

So this is me formally accepting the challenge.

I do not care if this NC lasts 10 years. I just want to feel better and get over this b#$ch.

She went back to her ex so thats never fun. Trying to man up and move on ASAP.

It is now Day 3.

 

[Adz--]

Day 22

I can say for certain that i don't think about my ex as much now, i still have my day's where i think of her that i am battening.
Each day that goes by i want her back less.. there are days where i really do miss her and some times where i'm like F*CK THAT B*TCH.
Also i'm trying to keep strong and not go onto her instagram and twitter

I find that my mind is always going through old memories that we had together which i am trying to put to rest.
On the other hand though i'v been nailing some chick for a month is just a lay.

adz--

 

[HW1984]

Day 7... made it a week and got through the weekend. Almost texted Saturday but didn't send it. Was back out on the rugby pitch today and started the bike rebuild I've been talking about for a year. Checked out her insta and wanted to tell her how gorgeous her pic was. What stopped me was not letting myself be weak and I told myslef why? You said it all at the break up. She knows how you feel, no reason to say it again. One good thing about breakups is that they motivate you to do things to stop your mind from going crazy.

 

[Bling]

should be day 10, but I guess it's day 3. damn. I just facebook stalked her. nothing good except the guy before me in her life getting all beta. :yawn:

need to find me a new girl

 

[yonggg]

day 10,
its so hard lately, i miss her so much, worried about her.
shouldnt i text her so she know that i care?

 

[Chrissanderson89]

The new challange ahead

Hey,

I have just come across this forum on a google search and some of the stories are inspirational, are you still running this forum as i am seeking advice and a little support.

Thanks

 

[HW1984]

Yonggg.... Don't text, call, or anything. Looks desperate and you are NOT depserate. You have to believe and know that. Stay strong.

Day 8.....

Last night was rough. Hot me like a ton of bricks. Barely slept and just kept thinking about her. It was hard to get up this morning but that's life. Get up and go. She was still on my mind this morining and I must have created 100scenarios of talking to her. But they all ended with what if it doesn't go as planned. Truth is it won't and will only hurt you more. Just now I felt a breath of fresh air. I felt like myself, my old self. Confident, happy, determined. I know there will be other tough days ahead but oh well. Do what you have to do for you. No one else. It's an amazing world out there. Get to it.

 

[yonggg]

Yonggg.... Don't text, call, or anything. Looks desperate and you are NOT depserate. You have to believe and know that. Stay strong.

Day 8.....

Last night was rough. Hot me like a ton of bricks. Barely slept and just kept thinking about her. It was hard to get up this morning but that's life. Get up and go. She was still on my mind this morining and I must have created 100scenarios of talking to her. But they all ended with what if it doesn't go as planned. Truth is it won't and will only hurt you more. Just now I felt a breath of fresh air. I felt like myself, my old self. Confident, happy, determined. I know there will be other tough days ahead but oh well. Do what you have to do for you. No one else. It's an amazing world out there. Get to it.

stay strong for u too.
i regret i ever let myself love her.
its like if only i can go back to my old self before i decided to love her, i was confident happy.

i know clearly that i can get better woman than her, but its just like im under her spell.
it consumes me, ruining my life,
i know that if i finally get over her, i will have a great life again, but as i said, im under her spell.

 

[HW1984]

Yonggg....

Don't ever regret loving anyone. We love and we lose. Just be happy that you are able to love. Mine left me because she said she didn't know if she was able to love. Now that is a miserable life. She is gone and you are only under your spell. Just smile, it'll go away.

 

[tripod23]

afternoon guys............just been reading ,,,,and iv got to tell you that if you text , call , turn up at her work , send flowers , anything of this nature will put you on the ropes........trust what im saying...........its none of my business what you do ....but if you are to ever talk to your princesses ever again it has to be her idea.......simple.............

if you start to chase her you are doomed .....and you have to believe this , it will just reconfirm in her mind that she can do what the hell she wants in regards to how she treats you..this is not a very good situation to be in and it will make you feel even worse than you do as you are reading this .

if she reaches out to you....be nice if at all possible.....this is where i really struggle because i dont forgive very easily.......and to me the vag isnt worth losing your self respect over no matter how hot she thinks she is...and its as simple as that in my mind.

but be nice and cool.....if she starts all this can we be friends bs , dont fall into it because there will be more shyt to follow , watch her actions and not her words.....but if your anything like me i would never trust her again , especially after what iv been through and what iv seen , im 6 months now and i havent text , called , or anything since i give her a piece of my mind for the way she was treating me , and i will continue to do another 6 , 12 , 18 , 24 , months yrs ......i dont give a shyt anymore because i know its her loss and thats how i look at it . ...if she moves on and find a guy 10 times better than me ....well best of luck to her....fvck it.

i have had an ex come back to me after 20 years just recently and the stuff she told me , reconfirmed in my mind that women never forget a decent guy for many reasons.........

let them play the little games , but just dont be part of the drama because the pain isnt worth the outcome , its the way life is guys , just improve where you can and crack on ..trust me you will be glad you did.

best of luck to you all

 

[VenX]

Yonggg....

Don't ever regret loving anyone. We love and we lose. Just be happy that you are able to love. Mine left me because she said she didn't know if she was able to love. Now that is a miserable life. She is gone and you are only under your spell. Just smile, it'll go away.

I know that miserable feeling. After nearly 3 years, mine told me she only liked me and never loved me. Said she has never loved anyone. Ouch.

Edit: Having not loved anyone is living a pretty miserable life too

 

[Dgwizdal]

HW1984: Read my post.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=160056&page=173

Fuko: You've been broken up with this chick for 6 months+ and youre still making the mistakes of wallowing around. Time to pony up and get your balls back with this new chick.

The light that you guys cant see is that you have the potential to come out on top here. The more you sit around trying to replay the past, the more of a b!tch you become.

Time to look ahead at 6+ months from now when you have you sh!t together, you haven't given your ex the time of day, you accidently run into her and you handle that sh!t amusingly with 0 fVcks given cause you're banging new chicks and CAN have your ex back as if want. It is all in your head.

During this 6 months, if you have forced yourself to move on, you have rejected any advances, contact, etc from her, you will literally feel the power come over you. You don't see it but You've got the potential to nuke this pvssy from orbit with the most powerful neg of all - moving the f*ck on.

IT IS LAUGHABLE HOW FLIRTY, TOUCHY FEELY, AND OPEN MY 6 YEAR EX WHO DUMPED ME 2 YEARS AGO IS NOW. I TOLD HER TO F*CK OFF AND BLEW HER OFF COMPLETELY FOR A SOLID YEAR AFTER SHE F*CKED ME AROUND. I SAID TO MYSELF F*CK THIS SH!T, STARTING BANGING NEW CHICKS, STARTED BANGING HER FRIENDS, AND BECAME THE FVCKIN MAN. NOW SHE CANNOT TOUCH ME AND NOW SHE IS A F*CKIN WHALE DATING SOME TURD WHO I HAVE NOTHING BUT NICE THINGS TO SAY ABOUT HIM TO HER BC I DONT GIVE A F*CK. HAMSTER NUKED. I TREAT HER LIKE IM THE KING AND SHE'S A MAID AND SHE F*CKIN LOVES/HATES IT.

FROM THE LOWEST BETA POINT IN MY LIFE TO HAVING HER CONSTANTLY SWEAT ME BECAUSE MY VALUE IS SKY HIGH NOW AND SHE HAS HIT THE WALL HARD HAS BEEN AN EPIC JOURNEY. IT IS COMPLETELY OBTAINABLE BY ALL OF YOU IF YOU PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOU @SSES, STOP GIVING A F*CK ABOUT HER, AND FOCUS YOUR ENERGY INWARD. YOU WILL COME OUT ON TOP, YOU WILL BE WANTED BY HER AGAIN, AND YOU WILL BE IN CONTROL.

AND THE BEST PART ABOUT IT IS THAT YOU WILL NOT WANT HER BACK. COWBOY UP F@GGOTS. THE OPPORTUNITY YOU HAVE HERE IS PRICELESS.

 

[HW1984]

Dgwizdal..... Good words.

I'm on day 8 and over all this. I may sound like a hypocrite right now b/c is you look at my day to day thoughts I have been all over the place. Dgwizdal is right... F* it all. We are men ans somewhere along the lines we have lost that.

As I say Day 8 I am now back to Day 1 but will not call it that. If you are still counting the days you are still thinking too much. I contacted her this afternoon. Not chasing, not asking ?'s or any of that. I have been checking her insta and yesterday she posted something that made me angry and today I just felt sad for her by what I saw. I commented and she replied. As goes below.

Her Post: Anyone who tells me to folow my heart will get shanked. Follow your mind, your heart is an idiot.
Me: Don't believe in this crap. Your mind drives you crazy but your heart finds you happiness. The key is to get them on the same page.
Her: Same page? They are clearly not even in the same book.
Me: To put differently, moving in the same direction. As the saying goes mind body and soul as one.
Her: I can barely dress myself. Mind body and soul.... still a work in progress. All I can say is that I am trying. I'm sorry.
Me: just keep working on yourself. It will come.
Her: Guess I'm afraid I will never find a happy place. Things will be different once I get off this hampster wheel. Well I hope.

I am leaving it there. Going ghost again. As I will not be her shoulder to cry on. Maybe I'm weak for contacting her but I don't give a F*. For someone to think like that is just sad and if I can offer words I will regardless of who it is. I will say since that my anxiety has been lifted. I'm happy with my life and moving. I have no want for her back right now b/c you can't be with unstable.

Only you know what is best for you. I am still a firm believer in NC and for most of you it is what you need to do. Especially if you are still torn apart inside. I have come to grips with everything so I did what was best for me. Stay strong MEN. It is who you are by nature. Your ex or the women that you wish to have in the future will chew you up and sh*t you out if you act week. Good Luck!

 

[Dgwizdal]

Dgwizdal..... Good words.

I'm on day 8 and over all this. I may sound like a hypocrite right now b/c is you look at my day to day thoughts I have been all over the place. Dgwizdal is right... F* it all. We are men ans somewhere along the lines we have lost that.

As I say Day 8 I am now back to Day 1 but will not call it that. If you are still counting the days you are still thinking too much. I contacted her this afternoon. Not chasing, not asking ?'s or any of that. I have been checking her insta and yesterday she posted something that made me angry and today I just felt sad for her by what I saw. I commented and she replied. As goes below.

Her Post: Anyone who tells me to folow my heart will get shanked. Follow your mind, your heart is an idiot.
Me: Don't believe in this crap. Your mind drives you crazy but your heart finds you happiness. The key is to get them on the same page.
Her: Same page? They are clearly not even in the same book.
Me: To put differently, moving in the same direction. As the saying goes mind body and soul as one.
Her: I can barely dress myself. Mind body and soul.... still a work in progress. All I can say is that I am trying. I'm sorry.
Me: just keep working on yourself. It will come.
Her: Guess I'm afraid I will never find a happy place. Things will be different once I get off this hampster wheel. Well I hope.

I am leaving it there. Going ghost again. As I will not be her shoulder to cry on. Maybe I'm weak for contacting her but I don't give a F*. For someone to think like that is just sad and if I can offer words I will regardless of who it is. I will say since that my anxiety has been lifted. I'm happy with my life and moving. I have no want for her back right now b/c you can't be with unstable.

Only you know what is best for you. I am still a firm believer in NC and for most of you it is what you need to do. Especially if you are still torn apart inside. I have come to grips with everything so I did what was best for me. Stay strong MEN. It is who you are by nature. Your ex or the women that you wish to have in the future will chew you up and sh*t you out if you act week. Good Luck!

YOU FAILED. Stop kidding yourself and rationalizing that you've came to terms so its ok. Been 8 f*ckin days.

That sh*t was beta as f*ck and is the definition of being an emotional tampon. Did you talk like this when you dated...? You will look back on these actions one day and squirm with disgust. Clearly she's hurting and you're only babying her wounds.

Reread my words and delete everything, zero contact, nothing. This is the only way and the sooner you stop f*ckin around commenting on her IG with that weak emotional sh*t, the sooner you will get your nuts back. Start being the a$$hole who could care less. NOW. OR YOU WILL FOREVER BE A WEAK F@GGOT IN HER EYES. ALL YOU ARE DOING IS HURTING YOURSELF WITH THIS SH!T D@MNIT! :cuss:

I WISH I HAD SOMEONE LIKE ME TELLING ME TO GET MY HEAD OUT OF MY @SS WHEN I WENT THROUGH THIS. COMPLETE INACTION IS THE ONLY ACTION YOU SHOULD BE TAKING WITH YOUR EX. PERIOD. PERIOD. PERIOD.

ANYTHING ELSE AND YOU DEVALUE YOURSELF AS MAN, DISREPECT YOURSELF, AND FLUSH ANY REMAINING ATTRACTION LEFT DOWN THE TOILET.



ATTRACTION. IS. ALL. THAT. MATTERS.

 

[HW1984]

Dgwizdal...

You are right.

Emotional tampon - check
Beta as F* - check

During the end yes, I offered this crap as advice when she was an emotional mess instead of just saying get over it. Which I know is what killed it. I was too available. For some reason didn't see this right here as falling right back in to that. Still don't regret it. At least not right now. Just have to find my inner voice to cuss me out like that before I do stupid sh*t. Thanks.

 

[HW1984]

WTF...... Here comes the regret boys.... In the midst of the comments she said she had a self pity weekend... I just F*ed that up. She was starting to miss me and I thought I'd reach out. Gave her what she wanted. Your mind and it's tricks.

Day 1 of NC starts again tomorrow.... I will no longer be offering any advise to you guys. Just listening until I'm stronger. Was gonna respond one last time. Can't do the friend thing, have to go do me now. But she would see right through that since I just broke NC. Should have posted here before I did it. She messaged last. and that is where it will stay.

All social media..... GONE!

 

[tripod23]

HW1984: Read my post.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=160056&page=173

Fuko: You've been broken up with this chick for 6 months+ and youre still making the mistakes of wallowing around. Time to pony up and get your balls back with this new chick.

The light that you guys cant see is that you have the potential to come out on top here. The more you sit around trying to replay the past, the more of a b!tch you become.

Time to look ahead at 6+ months from now when you have you sh!t together, you haven't given your ex the time of day, you accidently run into her and you handle that sh!t amusingly with 0 fVcks given cause you're banging new chicks and CAN have your ex back as if want. It is all in your head.

During this 6 months, if you have forced yourself to move on, you have rejected any advances, contact, etc from her, you will literally feel the power come over you. You don't see it but You've got the potential to nuke this pvssy from orbit with the most powerful neg of all - moving the f*ck on.

IT IS LAUGHABLE HOW FLIRTY, TOUCHY FEELY, AND OPEN MY 6 YEAR EX WHO DUMPED ME 2 YEARS AGO IS NOW. I TOLD HER TO F*CK OFF AND BLEW HER OFF COMPLETELY FOR A SOLID YEAR AFTER SHE F*CKED ME AROUND. I SAID TO MYSELF F*CK THIS SH!T, STARTING BANGING NEW CHICKS, STARTED BANGING HER FRIENDS, AND BECAME THE FVCKIN MAN. NOW SHE CANNOT TOUCH ME AND NOW SHE IS A F*CKIN WHALE DATING SOME TURD WHO I HAVE NOTHING BUT NICE THINGS TO SAY ABOUT HIM TO HER BC I DONT GIVE A F*CK. HAMSTER NUKED. I TREAT HER LIKE IM THE KING AND SHE'S A MAID AND SHE F*CKIN LOVES/HATES IT.

FROM THE LOWEST BETA POINT IN MY LIFE TO HAVING HER CONSTANTLY SWEAT ME BECAUSE MY VALUE IS SKY HIGH NOW AND SHE HAS HIT THE WALL HARD HAS BEEN AN EPIC JOURNEY. IT IS COMPLETELY OBTAINABLE BY ALL OF YOU IF YOU PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOU @SSES, STOP GIVING A F*CK ABOUT HER, AND FOCUS YOUR ENERGY INWARD. YOU WILL COME OUT ON TOP, YOU WILL BE WANTED BY HER AGAIN, AND YOU WILL BE IN CONTROL.

AND THE BEST PART ABOUT IT IS THAT YOU WILL NOT WANT HER BACK. COWBOY UP F@GGOTS. THE OPPORTUNITY YOU HAVE HERE IS PRICELESS.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

couldnt agree more......keep moving and improving and take no shyt from her and your good to go ........nice write up mate

 

[yonggg]

WTF...... Here comes the regret boys.... In the midst of the comments she said she had a self pity weekend... I just F*ed that up. She was starting to miss me and I thought I'd reach out. Gave her what she wanted. Your mind and it's tricks.

Day 1 of NC starts again tomorrow.... I will no longer be offering any advise to you guys. Just listening until I'm stronger. Was gonna respond one last time. Can't do the friend thing, have to go do me now. But she would see right through that since I just broke NC. Should have posted here before I did it. She messaged last. and that is where it will stay.

All social media..... GONE!

keep giving advice to me.
day 11 now. its been very hard.
i dont know why i keep thinking that i should text her, because she at overseas, and i shouldve been someone thatcare and encourage her. am i wrong?

 

[bateman72]

keep giving advice to me.
day 11 now. its been very hard.
i dont know why i keep thinking that i should text her, because she at overseas, and i shouldve been someone thatcare and encourage her. am i wrong?

This is just your mind fvcking with you. Her response will disappoint you. make her believe you are gone and maintain silence.

it really is the only way.