You may not be a cheater but your a branch swinging monkey. To me, a branch swinging monkey isn't much better than a cheater. Actually I can respect a cheater more because at least she goes out and does it, whereas the branch swinging monkey make a nieve attempt to pretend that everything is ok.
OK, rather than discuss hypotheticals, let's stick with the facts. Perhaps I am a "branch swinger" based on my actions in the past. I've been in two relationships (both of which were LTRs) and I did move on quite fast from my ex to my bf. This is the action that can be construed as "branch swinging."
Do you really think your male friend's feelings are going to go away or he's goig to stop thinking that way. He's merely going to sit back and wait until your vulnerable, it might be until you have a breakup, then technically you'll be single and boom.
My friend is gay, I suppose in my eyes this makes him a non-threat. Since I'm away from home, I do keep in touch with people more often than I would if I were back at home (it gets pretty darn lonely here). I'm not much of a party goer, so I stay in a lot of the time.
Since having the conversation with my friend, I have not initiated contact. The last time he spoke to me, we kept it fairly brief and to the point. I suspect that as the days go on, he and I will speak less and less.
I think if you truly respected your relationship, you wouldn't keep him as a friend, when he let his intentions be known. My ex told me of a scenario where she did that, a year and a half later though, she suddenly had male friends and I seen the writing on the wall.
I haven't kept him as a friend really since he told me. My behaviour towards him is markedly different (and he knows this as well, which is why he has reduced contact).
You may have experiences with women who like to keep men around for "just in case." I can't do much to quash your particular observations but to say that I am not like this. I don't talk to him as much. I have no problem with this.
Its a sign of the beginning of the end. You wouldn't be seekig male companionship if you were satisfied with your man. But thats just my experience.
Like I said, I probably speak to more of my friends (outside of my core groups of friends) because I don't have too much contact with people here.
That said, I do see your point. It would be very convenient for me to keep my friend hanging around just in case I want to swing from this branch to the next. But that just ain't the case here.
