she asked for a break for a few days i accepted then text her later to end things.

[drift_king]

ok i followed the advice which u guys gave me and i walked away from this girl.

when i was suppose to meet her monday and pick her up at 8pm, i already had seen her earlier in the day to confirm the time but her b1tchy friend was there.

anyway when i went to pick her up she didnt answer her phone, then i tried again then someone turned her phone off. so i go up to her dorm room to get her and her friends are in there and 1 of them goes crazy on me telling me to come back tomorrow saying the girl im seeing is ill and she slams the door in my face. i thought wtf? at 1st and left then i thought given the whole commotion of the event maybe she was ill so i went back to see if she was ok and her friend went mental on me so i swore at her friend cos she was being f-ing rude at me.

anyway the next day i saw my girl and she looked displeased, i was p1ssed too cos i thought this was a whole bullsh1t elaborate stunt to get rid of me. it turns out she wasn't ill but she passed out from drinking 2 hours before seeing me and her friends her in her room looking after her.

when they relayed the info back to her she only heard their side that i swore at her friend and unsurprisingly her friend never told her that she slammed the door in my face. now obviously the girl im seeing will side with her friend, and her friend gave her an ultimatum of if she ever sees this guy (me) again, she'll never talk to her again. emotional blackmail knowing she'll definitely choose her best friend on campus over me.

we had words and she told me staight out 'i dont like u anymore' i was like 'i dont like u anymore either, i cant be with someone who treats me this way and makes me feel bad'

she suggested something along the lines of not seeing each other for a few days just to clear the air so she has time to think. but realistically this could just be a delayed prolonged break up for her to maybe see if i'll come back so she knows she can have me anytime. or she just said that so she could leave the situation yesterday and go back to studying.

anyway my hot female friend told me to text her that night and say to forget the not seeing each other thing for a few days and just end it there cos it would surprise her.

she concocted this plan of making her jealous cos she said that if i act in different after this and have a new hot girl to make her jealous so quickly and cos i sent that surprising text it'll either a)make her contact me later or b)show that she was never interested in the 1st place.

am i too far gone for this to happen?

 

[drift_king]

the problem is that my friend is leaving for about a week so today is the only day the girl im seeing can see us around together. i dont really have any other girls who could help me and even so it might be too obvious.

mean while i'm looking for new girls but realistically i won't have anything firm for at least 2 weeks.

when i ended with the text yesterday she sent me something back along the lines of that i seem to know what im doing and its probably the right decision. and it was an pleasure meeting me and sorry that she could not do the same for me. to me it seemed like relief more than anything else that she finally has it ended without another awkward convo in a few days. but my friend said that there is relief BUT she will question why did i do this cos it was so surprisinging considering i kept chasing her and coming back before.

the thing is i dont think this plan is going to work without new hot girls to make me look good or make her jealous and even if she does contact me the most she will do is ask 'hey what are u doing?' and try to get me to ask her out. i obviously cant succumb the 1st time of asking but given what i know she is like she does not chase and gives up after trying once..

if i do not have hot girls to make her jealous and i act indifferent for a week, if i see her next week and make her laugh and remind her why she liked me in the 1st place can i ask her out 1 more time to see if i can get things back on track?

i feel really regretful for sending that ending things text yesterday cos somewhere deep down i felt she'd think this over and we'd have a talk in a few days and i'd remind her why she liked me in the 1st place and she'd want to see me again.

i know it's stupid cos this could tell her she can have me anytime she wants cos she could agree then flake on me. but given what shes like she probably wont however if we dont kiss that night then its over.

she keeps giving me chances to come back but maybe its cos she likes the attention and will meet up with me for an ego boost.

my gut feeling is that she was geuninely interested in me on some level but also liked the attention and ego boost.

 

[Asasione]

Let her go. There are better women that will like you in the future and will appreciate your worth. This girl isn't worth your time, you've gone through piles of shlt to stay with her, can you realistically endure these games and drama on the long run?

Forget her and search for better women. Really ask yourself, what's so good about this girl? And then ask yourself what do you want in a girl? You'll realise the only merit she has is that you like her, not because she's beautiful and has qualities you d like (there are more beautiful women with qualities you'd like) but, simply because you like her you think she's special.

 

[DJ_Tekinkel]

WOW this girl is retarded, man you done the RIGHT thing what the hell are you questioning yourself for anyway!

Aren't you a DJ-to be. then better game up! NEXT that like you have
Chase some other tail, laugh at her loss. She lost YOU the prize. I think you got major oneitis bro

Game on! be strong, be Don Juan! you think a real PUA would care? She treats you like crap, is a headcase, wouldn't see you cause she was "sick" wont believe your side of the story. I think that speaks for itself

time to find you a a new girl/s lol

 

[Gangster Of Love]

ok i followed the advice which u guys gave me and i walked away from this girl.

when i was suppose to meet her monday and pick her up at 8pm, i already had seen her earlier in the day to confirm the time but her b1tchy friend was there.

anyway when i went to pick her up she didnt answer her phone, then i tried again then someone turned her phone off. so i go up to her dorm room to get her and her friends are in there and 1 of them goes crazy on me telling me to come back tomorrow saying the girl im seeing is ill and she slams the door in my face. i thought wtf? at 1st and left then i thought given the whole commotion of the event maybe she was ill so i went back to see if she was ok and her friend went mental on me so i swore at her friend cos she was being f-ing rude at me.

anyway the next day i saw my girl and she looked displeased, i was p1ssed too cos i thought this was a whole bullsh1t elaborate stunt to get rid of me. it turns out she wasn't ill but she passed out from drinking 2 hours before seeing me and her friends her in her room looking after her.

when they relayed the info back to her she only heard their side that i swore at her friend and unsurprisingly her friend never told her that she slammed the door in my face. now obviously the girl im seeing will side with her friend, and her friend gave her an ultimatum of if she ever sees this guy (me) again, she'll never talk to her again. emotional blackmail knowing she'll definitely choose her best friend on campus over me.

we had words and she told me staight out 'i dont like u anymore' i was like 'i dont like u anymore either, i cant be with someone who treats me this way and makes me feel bad'

she suggested something along the lines of not seeing each other for a few days just to clear the air so she has time to think. but realistically this could just be a delayed prolonged break up for her to maybe see if i'll come back so she knows she can have me anytime. or she just said that so she could leave the situation yesterday and go back to studying.

anyway my hot female friend told me to text her that night and say to forget the not seeing each other thing for a few days and just end it there cos it would surprise her.

she concocted this plan of making her jealous cos she said that if i act in different after this and have a new hot girl to make her jealous so quickly and cos i sent that surprising text it'll either a)make her contact me later or b)show that she was never interested in the 1st place.

am i too far gone for this to happen?

For what to happen?

You did the right thing, as long as you did it because that's the sane thing to do, and not as a trick to actually try to get back with her.

I haven't followed on your situation, but if a broad considers you that replaceable, behind her "on campus best friend", then she wasn't as into you as you thought or as she should. When a chick is really into you, she'll usually listen to her friends' opinions, but will stick with you.

What are you trying to get out of this?

The fact that she actually agreed with you regarding the text, should tell you she is/was one step ahead of you. Looks like she was just looking for an excuse to get rid of you. Stop it NOW!!! This is the time for you eject with some dignity in tact. Stay away for those "2 weeks" that it would take you to get other girls anyway.

Get busy with other girls, and you won't even feel the void left by this one. It's like when you eat after not eating for a good 8-9 hours, you are starving and you will just eat junk and crap that is not good for you. When you are starved and desperate, you are very likely, if not guaranteed, to do something very stupid.

 

[drift_king]

For what to happen?

You did the right thing, as long as you did it because that's the sane thing to do, and not as a trick to actually try to get back with her.

I haven't followed on your situation, but if a broad considers you that replaceable, behind her "on campus best friend", then she wasn't as into you as you thought or as she should. When a chick is really into you, she'll usually listen to her friends' opinions, but will stick with you.

What are you trying to get out of this?

The fact that she actually agreed with you regarding the text, should tell you she is/was one step ahead of you. Looks like she was just looking for an excuse to get rid of you. Stop it NOW!!! This is the time for you eject with some dignity in tact. Stay away for those "2 weeks" that it would take you to get other girls anyway.

Get busy with other girls, and you won't even feel the void left by this one. It's like when you eat after not eating for a good 8-9 hours, you are starving and you will just eat junk and crap that is not good for you. When you are starved and desperate, you are very likely, if not guaranteed, to do something very stupid.

i have no idea anymore.. it's just so painful. she's the 1st girl i've met in my life where i was willing to wait for in terms of sleeping with her.. usually im just looking to bang them as soon as possible within the 1st month so i'd either f it up or move on. with her i enjoyed talking to her so much and everything apart from her behaviour seemed so great.

she was a flake, but never flaked on me, also a coward for not ending things with me in a diplomatic way. so spoilt. i must have made the mistake of finding a girl who was not suitable and i actually liked the personality for once. it was a perfect balance of what i wanted looks wise and personality bar behaviour that i thought i was in love stupidly.

deep down i still want her back in my heart but my head tells me to walk away. this whole plan was concocted from my hot b1tchy friend to get my value up so at least i can set some terms if i do end up seeing her.

but i think im too far gone that i shouldn't get with her at all cos unconsciously she's disrespected me even if she doesn't realise it cos she's so spoilt. it's like dating a 15 year old who wants to do what she wants when she wants and doesn't have the heart to cancel or rearrange in advance of a meeting.

i guess her text response indicates that i was just doing her a favour and she was tired of me so i'll never know if she geniunely liked me or if i hadn't got angry with her would we still be seeing each other. the nail in the coffin is 2 days in a row i lost it and her b1tchy friends bad mouthing me about what happened when they're straight lying to her or mistelling the truth. she believes them over me and theres no way of convincing her of what actually happened when she has 4-5 different friends relaying what happened from their perspective.

but i think already by then it was over. if only i saw her on friday after the kissing incident all of this would have been avoided. and i said this. but it's too late now she's made up her mind that i'm unstable and let my emotions get the better of me when they pull spoilt little girl crap.

how do i not let that stuff affect me and not tell them off?

 

[Igetit!]

I know this may sound crazy,but even with all the AFCness you've shown her,it may be possible to still win her over.


I said may be.


But you'd have to do some things that I already know would be difficult for you to do.


For one,you'd have to put YOURSELF,that is your pride and self-respect as a MAN above sex.


You'd need to stop being controlled by lust and your desire for sex.

Your problem is you let the possibility of "getting some" make you act a fool in the girl's eyes.




It is possible to get her back,but you'll need to follow instructions that'll go against what your feelings are telling you to do.



And that's your weak point.


You've gotten advice on top of advice and you've ignored it all and followed how you felt,and that's why you're in this mess.




The other posters say that there are other girls out there who would appreciate you and treat you better.



I wholeheartedly DISAGREE.


Any other girl you pursue will treat you EXACTLY like this one did.



You know why? Because it wasn't the girl that was the problem,it was YOU.


If you go and pursue another girl,all you'd be doing is taking your AFCness from this girl to the next one.



In the beginning,the new girl would be open to you and may even give you some IOIs,but once she gets to know you,and your AFCness shines through as the "newness" fades away,you'll be right back in the same old ditch with a different girl.



Does this seems to follow you around from girl to girl? If so,do you know why?


It's because YOU TAKE IT WITH YOU FROM GIRL TO GIRL.



You go to this girl,act AFC,then wreck your opportunity.

Then you move on to the next one,things seem ok at first,you act AFC once again,run her off,then on to the next one to screw that one up.



And you know what the funny part of it is? You think it's the girl! :crackup:


Like I said,it may be possible to still win her over,but the actions you need to take will require you behaving like a MAN,not a horny,hormone driven sex-crazed adolescent.

 

[macallik]

I agree with igetit that there has been far too much AFC ness with this girl (judgin by your thread history anywyays) However, I disagree about even ATTEMPTING to salvage this relationship tho. Waaaay too much work and not worth it based on what we've read about the girl in this thread. He can act like a new man with a new girl or take some time by himself to sort his insecurities out. Tryin to stay with her should NOT be on the table at all IMO

 

[SchoolBoy]

I agree with igetit that there has been far too much AFC ness with this girl (judgin by your thread history anywyays) However, I disagree about even ATTEMPTING to salvage this relationship tho. Waaaay too much work and not worth it based on what we've read about the girl in this thread. He can act like a new man with a new girl or take some time by himself to sort his insecurities out. Tryin to stay with her should NOT be on the table at all IMO

I agree, move on.. and stop thinking with your emotions or pen1s... that's what gets AFCs into trouble. Think with your head, and I don't mean the one down there.

 

[vitor]

Im taking away your man card and will give it back later. Drop this crazy *****.

1st. Your supposed to go out or hang out and she gets black out drunk
2nd. Her friends Hate you and control her.
3rd. You are spending so much time and energy thinking how to get her back,
make her jealous, it is pathetic

Man up, move on, find girls who want to spend time with you.

 

[Warrior74]

Is this the same chic you been obsessing over?

I have a feeling the reality of the situation and your view of it are two different things.

This sent off red flags for me.

anyway when i went to pick her up she didnt answer her phone, then i tried again then someone turned her phone off. so i go up to her dorm room to get her and her friends are in there and 1 of them goes crazy on me telling me to come back tomorrow saying the girl im seeing is ill and she slams the door in my face. i thought wtf? at 1st and left then i thought given the whole commotion of the event maybe she was ill so i went back to see if she was ok and her friend went mental on me so i swore at her friend cos she was being f-ing rude at me.

anyway the next day i saw my girl and she looked displeased, i was p1ssed too cos i thought this was a whole bullsh1t elaborate stunt to get rid of me. it turns out she wasn't ill but she passed out from drinking 2 hours before seeing me and her friends her in her room looking after her.

That's bull****. Some other dude was there and her girlfriend was covering. She told you she doesn't like you because she found someone else, so don't turn on the waterworks when you seen her with someone else next week. (That's my theory anyway).

You have a hard f*cking head man. Go read the dj bible for the next two weeks before you post again. Dead serious. You need to do a lot of work. You are a complete AFC. Admit it. Own it. Change it. If you want to change your world, you have to change yourself. Start studying.

 

[romangod]

I agree with igetit that there has been far too much AFC ness with this girl (judgin by your thread history anywyays) However, I disagree about even ATTEMPTING to salvage this relationship tho.

I agree, also. The problem is not the girl. The problem is with the OP who's an AFC being led to slaughter. It's time for him to work on himself and grow some balls and leave her to get drunk with her friends.


Cheers!

 

[YogurtSlinger]

Two suggestions.

1. Move on. She's not worth it and it's too screwed up to fix.
2. Pay a little more attention in your English class, especially when they talk about spelling and punctuation, and a little less to girls for a while.

 

[AAAgent]

ur retarded and need a hard lesson at life. Never let a girls actions emotionally effect you in any bad way. Actually never let anyone emotionally effect you in a bad way. If she ****ed up and u don't think she deserves another chance which is what it seems like your thinking...THEN MOVE ON. there are plenty of b!tches out othere like her and plenty of good girls too. If u want a b!tch, don't complain about this and that because you should have been prepared for it. Set firm guidelines for yourself/girl with things that you will and won't accept and stand by them even if it's hard at first. Eventually the guidelines that you set will eventually stop being crossed.

you know why?

That's because you've become a man of your word and woman will be scared to attempt to try to walk over you because if they fail, they not only fail at the attempt but they lose you as well. Get control of yourself first, then control of your relationship will slowly fall into place.

 

[Prodigy746]

Why the f would you even want to be with this girl... seriously...she lets her friend slam the door in your face and she takes her side. Man plzzzzzz where are your balls?

 

[slaog]

What are you doing on this site? Are you hear to use it as a sort of diary or are you trying to better yourself. You havn't a clue what you're doing and your AFC emotions are clouding your judgment. Thats why the good advise you've been getting this past week or so have not sunk in.


No point blaming her or her friends. Her friends were only under orders. You think they'd be like that if she liked you... their actions spoke louder then any words. Why do you think they were so nasty towards you? Its because that girl you're after was bad mouthing you to them building up a bad picture of you in their minds.


So as everybody else has said... it's over so accept it.


What are you going to do now that its over and you feel like crap? Do the same thing again or start working on yourself?

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Backbreaker said it best last week; this guy needs to get emotionally body-slammed to the lowest of lows before he's actually going to listen to anything anyone has posted here.

He's already recieved top notch advice and the funny part is, if he would've actually listening right away, he probably would've had this dumb byatch chasing him by now.....

He blames his situation on specific incidents, but still fails to realize its not about the girl or an opportunity missed... its about the fact that he has been exposed as a major chump and doesn't even realize it yet.

He hasn't hit rock bottom yet, he's still plotting ways to get her back sadly enough. Be prepared, there is more to this saga.....




PIMP

 

[horaholic]

......Im sure there is. And Im sure we're all gonna read it too. God help us.

 

[Veridin]

Don't you just hate it when they let their friends do their dirty work for them. Let a friend get involved in the relationship stuff and tell you off - no way that is accepted.

But another comment, don't be so hard on the OP, people in this thread. Has he insulted you? Had he been aggressive toward you? No, so you shouldn't show attitude toward him. He already got that rude female friend telling him off, he doesn't need the same here. If you think he did something wrong, say it, but say it without showing how superior you are. Mistakes are perfectly normal.

 

[drift_king]

I know this may sound crazy,but even with all the AFCness you've shown her,it may be possible to still win her over.


I said may be.


But you'd have to do some things that I already know would be difficult for you to do.


For one,you'd have to put YOURSELF,that is your pride and self-respect as a MAN above sex.


You'd need to stop being controlled by lust and your desire for sex.

Your problem is you let the possibility of "getting some" make you act a fool in the girl's eyes.




It is possible to get her back,but you'll need to follow instructions that'll go against what your feelings are telling you to do.



And that's your weak point.


You've gotten advice on top of advice and you've ignored it all and followed how you felt,and that's why you're in this mess.




The other posters say that there are other girls out there who would appreciate you and treat you better.



I wholeheartedly DISAGREE.


Any other girl you pursue will treat you EXACTLY like this one did.



You know why? Because it wasn't the girl that was the problem,it was YOU.


If you go and pursue another girl,all you'd be doing is taking your AFCness from this girl to the next one.



In the beginning,the new girl would be open to you and may even give you some IOIs,but once she gets to know you,and your AFCness shines through as the "newness" fades away,you'll be right back in the same old ditch with a different girl.



Does this seems to follow you around from girl to girl? If so,do you know why?


It's because YOU TAKE IT WITH YOU FROM GIRL TO GIRL.



You go to this girl,act AFC,then wreck your opportunity.

Then you move on to the next one,things seem ok at first,you act AFC once again,run her off,then on to the next one to screw that one up.



And you know what the funny part of it is? You think it's the girl! :crackup:


Like I said,it may be possible to still win her over,but the actions you need to take will require you behaving like a MAN,not a horny,hormone driven sex-crazed adolescent.

the crazy thing is that i'm not looking to just get laid from this girl! literally i'd be willing to wait for her and i'm unwilling to do that ever.. that's what told me she was special.

i have anxiety issues dealing with uncertainty where i need things to be certain and known otherwise i freak out. im always ok picking up the girl but the 1st month is toture not knowing where i stand, if im lucky enough to get past this phase and actually know we're together i suddenly relax and everything is plain sailing from there.

i know the problem is with me and theres not much i can do, i've been through therapy to help me deal with the anxiety and the need for uncertainty but it still haunts me when dealing with girls. also the fact im super impatient compounds the problem.

i think i've royally screwed things up with her cos last night (1 day after i sent that original text) i wanted to just mess it up so i could move on to the next girl (my need for certainty again and me knowing i did all that i could) i called her last night, she didn't answer so i sent her some long text of

'i shouldnt have ended things with u by text yest out of pure decency and respect to u. it was wrong and i took the easier option when i should have done it in person. deep down i still like u and want u to be happy and i dont want out last meeting to be of us arguing in a cafe.. im regretful about my overreaction on Sunday when u forgot we were meeting. i shouldnt take things so seriously and think too much. we cant be friends nor together but somewhere in between would be ideal.'

i did this cos i wanted certainty of ending it so i could move on knowing i screwed it up. the problem is that the 1st time i messed things up with her 2 months ago by me giving her a heartfelt talk about what happened made her like me again so stupidly i feel as if i do that again now i'll be able to win her back cos she came back once before.

am i just too far gone that she won't even stop to talk to me or listen?

i just dont seem to be able to accept my fate and always need to feel i did everything i could in each situation so i can move on.

yes i have the same problem with every girl unless they're highly interested in me from the start then i feel more relaxed.