Seems like most women I meet now are fvcking crazy

[FlexpertHamilton]

Let me be clear: I'm not saying they're crazy as some sort of post-hoc gotcha moment, they tell me they're crazy from day 1 with all the shvt they say about themselves, all meds they take, and various diagnosed (or self diagnosed) mental/personality disorders.

I'm trying to take responsibility for it and there's basically three reasons:

a) I am not screening hard enough for mental illness/instability/ignoring red flags
b) I am dumpster diving for good pvssy at the expense of my sanity
c) Something about me is attracting crazy women specifically

Does anyone else experience this, and how do you deal with it? It's starting to become so frustrating and disappointing. For starters I think I am going to stop meeting women on OLD, because in my current location it's worse than ever. Going to focus on meeting women through pre-selection/social groups and good ol' cold approaches, but I am increasingly skeptical that women in the "real world" are any better.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Short-ish answer:

Yes... Statistically, women seek out psychotherapy more than men, most shrinks are poorly trained in empirically validated approaches, and subsequently give these broads a wide variety of diagnoses and counsel that just exacerbates their agony. Similar to the manner in which entirely too many men have gorged themselves on Red Pill Theology off of social media, blindly bought into all the sh-t they heard, subsequently become basket cases in their own right

That's where we're at culturally right now. Spending more than 5 minutes per day fretting over such things is less gainful than trying to have a rational conversation with anyone about the veracity of Repressed Memory Theory, during the height of Satanic Panic: Neither True Believers in the former, nor their foes(Drug War-supporting, Top Gun-loving Reganites, who were convinced that schoolteachers and parents are incapable of perpetrating evil), could be convinced that their worldview isn't The Truth

Then as now, emotions are going to have to cool , before we can once again have something approaching an intellectual discussion about these topics

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Weird, for me it's the opposite. Apart from my PTSD clients, most women I speak with are pretty level-headed. I think that if you meet many crazy people, you're moving in the wrong circles.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Weird, for me it's the opposite. Apart from my PTSD clients, most women I speak with are pretty level-headed. I think that if you meet many crazy people, you're moving in the wrong circles.

I'm mostly meeting women off OLD lately due to laziness, hence the dumpster diving comment. I've used OLD for a long time, but never encounted so many dumpster fire women like this until I moved to my current city. I will maintain the prevalence of Universities in this location is behind this, as stats show young, left leaning women have incredibly high rates of mental illness. I think i'm done with OLD for the time being.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Weird, for me it's the opposite. Apart from my PTSD clients, most women I speak with are pretty level-headed

Here in The US, we've had a real problem with what can only to be termed "Pseudo-Therapy" culture, from The 1970s-today. End result of which has been we're all a hell of a lot more neurotic

 

[Plinco]

Here in The US, we've had a real problem with what can only to be termed "Pseudo-Therapy" culture, from The 1970s-today. End result of which has been we're all a hell of a lot more neurotic

I thought you lived in Australia. Maybe you're not Pan87

 

[BaronOfHair]

I thought you lived in Australia

I was compelled to flee, after impersonating Mick Taylor in Wolf Creek one too many times*. Hint to all those who are thinking of doing likewise: Head On A Stick rarely pans out that smoothly in RL



*For all those who may have gotten triggered by what you just read: This is called being facetious, albeit darkly so... I've never severed parts of another human being's spine with a knife, and don't encourage anybody else to do so either

 

[Redwood]

Kinda second this. Meeting someone who doesn't have some hidden layer of chaos is like finding a needle in a haystack.

 

[Gamisch]

I have this issue as well, but I must also admit my tolerance got extremely low. A woman gets disqualified quite quickly tbh. One odd thing and poof ,she's disqualified. Can be an ex, something she likes like partying, a friend, a picture with a certain dress ect ect.

At some point you believe you've seen it all and heard it all . After getting REALLY close with women (and obviously tasting my fair share of drama) I started looking for redflags like a hawk. Meanwhile, there aint no such thjng as a "perfect human being ".

So OP, I wonder what makes you say these women are crazy? Do they actually have crazy traits that make you believe they are actually as crazy as you think?

 

[corrector]

What do you expect to happen when these women rack up insanely high body counts, that they are going to be more sane?

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

So OP, I wonder what makes you say these women are crazy? Do they actually have crazy traits that make you believe they are actually as crazy as you think?

I literally said it in my first two sentences lol. They TELL ME they're crazy. They have tons of meds that I can see. They tell me the shvt they say and do (one girl for instance, picked at her scalp to the point of scabbing), and tell me the mental disorders they have...and generally they seem to just be completely irrational and completely lacking in accountability.

 

[Clockwerk50]

I literally said it in my first two sentences lol. They TELL ME they're crazy. They have tons of meds that I can see. They tell me the shvt they say and do (one girl for instance, picked at her scalp to the point of scabbing), and tell me the mental disorders they have...and generally they seem to just be completely irrational and completely lacking in accountability.

I’ve encountered similar situations in the past. I’ve been on first dates where women have shared deeply personal details, such as the death of their mother from cancer two years ago, which still leaves emotional scars they can't move past; a rare condition affecting their vertebrae that’s causing them to lose their eyesight; obsessive-compulsive behaviours, like washing their hands repeatedly to soothe anxiety; or even confessions about an affair with a doctor, who promises to leave his family for her.

Some of these women are now married or have children. However, I’m not sure why they disclose such intimate, heavy information so soon. Maybe they’re trying to manage expectations for the relationship, or maybe is their lack of game, seeking a bond through sympathy. It could also be a subtle way of signaling they’re not that attracted to you, essentially friend-zoning you.

Regardless of the reason, if you're still interested in pursuing something physical with them, you just need to take the lead and make sure the situation doesn’t derail. If you’re not invested, though, you can stop putting any effort into the relationship.

For me personally, once I know too much about someone’s life story, it tends to turn me off. These women may be married now, but I’m still not sure why they open up about such heavy topics so early on.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

I’ve encountered similar situations in the past. I’ve been on first dates where women have shared deeply personal details, such as the death of their mother from cancer two years ago, which still leaves emotional scars they can't move past; a rare condition affecting their vertebrae that’s causing them to lose their eyesight; obsessive-compulsive behaviours, like washing their hands repeatedly to soothe anxiety; or even confessions about an affair with a doctor, who promises to leave his family for her.

Some of these women are now married or have children. However, I’m not sure why they disclose such intimate, heavy information so soon. Maybe they’re trying to manage expectations for the relationship, or maybe is their lack of game, seeking a bond through sympathy. It could also be a subtle way of signaling they’re not that attracted to you, essentially friend-zoning you.

Regardless of the reason, if you're still interested in pursuing something physical with them, you just need to take the lead and make sure the situation doesn’t derail. If you’re not invested, though, you can stop putting any effort into the relationship.

For me personally, once I know too much about someone’s life story, it tends to turn me off. These women may be married now, but I’m still not sure why they open up about such heavy topics so early on.

I've found that in the past few years, most women open up to me fairly quickly, both the good and bad ones. Some even cry in front of me or seem to seek solace from me, and I am willing to lend an ear and try to comfort them, because I am a naturally empathetic person. I do think I've developed better interpersonal skills as of late, but I do wonder how many men they do this with and how quickly, and by no means do I think I'm "special" in that regard. And to be clear I don't have a "captain save a hoe" attitude, but I simply recognize that people are flawed, vulnerable creatures (including myself) and I don't expect anyone to be fully self-actualized, especially with the state of the world today. I don't mind hearing others problems, it's not necessarily a turn off, I like when women can be vulnerable with me and as long as they don't project their insecurities, craziness, instability on to me, I can be patient with them, because I find 1-1 interactions with most people fairly interesting, and I genuinely enjoy the "behind closed doors" (honest, deep, intimate conversations) in this context because it's not something I've been exposed to for much of my life and I generally find this type of psychology interesting and revealing for understanding human nature.

All that said, I do admit that I find most women kind of shvt in bed, and after fvcking enough crazy hoes it has given me a taste for that mind blowing sex you get with them, so perhaps I am subsconsciously seeking out these types of women thinking they can at least give me my basic requirements for any relationship (whether casual or serious): basic respect, honesty/transparency, and consistenct communication. But I think that's too much to expect from these dumpster fires, and I'm at the point now where I'm realizing emotionally damaged people cannot help but project their problems onto me and the relationship, and I'm just over it.

 

[devilkingx2]

Most women are going to be some degree of crazy but if you’re experiencing an unusually high level of crazy it may be where and how you’re meeting women.

for example you can meet hoes at the library, but you’ll meet even more hoes at a night club.

 

[Bokanovsky]

I'm mostly meeting women off OLD lately due to laziness, hence the dumpster diving comment. I've used OLD for a long time, but never encounted so many dumpster fire women like this until I moved to my current city. I will maintain the prevalence of Universities in this location is behind this, as stats show young, left leaning women have incredibly high rates of mental illness. I think i'm done with OLD for the time being.

OLD is going to have a disproportionate amount of crazy women for obvious reasons.

 

[SW15]

I'm mostly meeting women off OLD lately due to laziness, hence the dumpster diving comment. I've used OLD for a long time, but never encounted so many dumpster fire women like this until I moved to my current city. I will maintain the prevalence of Universities in this location is behind this, as stats show young, left leaning women have incredibly high rates of mental illness. I think i'm done with OLD for the time being.

OLD is going to have a disproportionate amount of crazy women for obvious reasons.

Women met via swipe app are going to be the absolute worst women possible.

They are actively putting themselves out on a dating platform because they couldn't solve their dating lives through any real life method. Their day-to-day routines aren't putting them in contact with enough men who are asking them out in person or the men that are asking them out are somehow not acceptable to them.

There are a lot of ways that a woman can meet a man in real life who would be an acceptable boyfriend. She could meet him through any of the following ways (not an exhaustive list, but will cover major ones):

1. Nightlife venues
2. At her gym/a fitness class
3. In a co-ed sports league or run club
4. Through any type of activity club to which she belongs. This could be alumni events for her college alma mater, a church group, Meetup group, and so on. Some activity club things are better than others. Meetup.com groups tend to be total dog shiit.
5. If she's in college or high school, through anything on campus
6. Nearly any typical non-bar venue - At a mall, grocery store, bookstore, coffee shop, art gallery, on a hiking/walking path, and so on.
7. Through an introduction from one of her friends and/or social gatherings in her circle. This could also include introductions from co-workers.
8. Some dog shiit gimmick like a structured singles event. If a woman has to resort to this, it's about the same as swiping

I think it is a problematic sign if a woman can't find a boyfriend through Options 1-7. She also gets some DM's on every one of her social media platforms too. Instagram will likely be the most but most women on LinkedIn get offers for dates and sex on that platform.

There's less of an approach culture with the younger Millennials and Gen Z at this point, so that's why DM's and swipe apps are super common now for them.

 

[Solomon]

Let me be clear: I'm not saying they're crazy as some sort of post-hoc gotcha moment, they tell me they're crazy from day 1 with all the shvt they say about themselves, all meds they take, and various diagnosed (or self diagnosed) mental/personality disorders.

I'm trying to take responsibility for it and there's basically three reasons:

a) I am not screening hard enough for mental illness/instability/ignoring red flags
b) I am dumpster diving for good pvssy at the expense of my sanity
c) Something about me is attracting crazy women specifically

Does anyone else experience this, and how do you deal with it? It's starting to become so frustrating and disappointing. For starters I think I am going to stop meeting women on OLD, because in my current location it's worse than ever. Going to focus on meeting women through pre-selection/social groups and good ol' cold approaches, but I am increasingly skeptical that women in the "real world" are any better.

Kudos for having the self-awareness to understand the problem. A&B are the issue, and you compound that with the fact that you're dealing with OLD, which is a recipe for disaster. I would say a majority of women are not girlfriend or wifey material when it comes to OLD (this doesn't include the women you're not attracted to which is a default) I have noticed this has been an issue particularly in the last decade where women have just jumped the shark, with this whole "therapy" culture being embraced mainstream. Things women use to keep to themselves till at least a half a dozen dates they still you now on the first date or before. Trauma "dumping" or Trauma "bonding" are real things. How often have you dealt with women and you felt like therapists instead of a lover. It's one thing if I'm seeing you regularly and your girlfriend or we are smashing but it's another if you are just going on a date or two or heck never even met them!

OP it's not you but what is, is the venue (OLD) and when you entertain these types then it is you. My opinion is to focus this winter on leveling up at the gym or financially (that's what I'm doing) then hit the field with a vengeance next spring

 

[Solomon]

I've found that in the past few years, most women open up to me fairly quickly, both the good and bad ones. Some even cry in front of me or seem to seek solace from me, and I am willing to lend an ear and try to comfort them, because I am a naturally empathetic person. I do think I've developed better interpersonal skills as of late, but I do wonder how many men they do this with and how quickly, and by no means do I think I'm "special" in that regard. And to be clear I don't have a "captain save a hoe" attitude, but I simply recognize that people are flawed, vulnerable creatures (including myself) and I don't expect anyone to be fully self-actualized, especially with the state of the world today. I don't mind hearing others problems, it's not necessarily a turn off, I like when women can be vulnerable with me and as long as they don't project their insecurities, craziness, instability on to me, I can be patient with them, because I find 1-1 interactions with most people fairly interesting, and I genuinely enjoy the "behind closed doors" (honest, deep, intimate conversations) in this context because it's not something I've been exposed to for much of my life and I generally find this type of psychology interesting and revealing for understanding human nature.

All that said, I do admit that I find most women kind of shvt in bed, and after fvcking enough crazy hoes it has given me a taste for that mind blowing sex you get with them, so perhaps I am subconsciously seeking out these types of women thinking they can at least give me my basic requirements for any relationship (whether casual or serious): basic respect, honesty/transparency, and consistent communication. But I think that's too much to expect from these dumpster fires, and I'm at the point now where I'm realizing emotionally damaged people cannot help but project their problems onto me and the relationship, and I'm just over it.

OP sounds like you and are alike in that sense. You are become more mature and realize that people are flawed but not judging them for said flaws. It doesn't mean you're gullible or a sucker It just means you see human nature for what it is, it's imperfect. I will say these types of women can be very mentally draining as it takes energy to deal with them. A lot of people don't realize but there is a metaphysical level of consciousness and attraction that most in this forum have no nuance about because it takes an open mind to delve into these parts (strangely a lot of RP members have no issues believing in the red pill and blue mill analogy but the spiritual aspects get lost on them). These types of women are IMO Aare fun in bed not worth it. It will just lead you down to a road of being jaded, mentally exhausted, etc. OLD is filled with women for the most part who can't hack it in real life cause they are exposed for who they really are hence men who know them personally don't want anything to do with them. I know a couple of women if you saw their profile you would say "damns he is hot why is she on here?"

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Trauma "dumping" or Trauma "bonding" are real things. How often have you dealt with women and you felt like therapists instead of a lover. It's one thing if I'm seeing you regularly and your girlfriend or we are smashing but it's another if you are just going on a date or two or heck never even met them!

I once had a women claim that I "trauma dumped" her in my FIRST message for merely saying I liked something she said in her bio that I was tired of seeing from other women. You can begin to understand what women are doing by looking at the criticisms and insults they hurt at you and realize most of it is projection for what THEY do.

My opinion is to focus this winter on leveling up at the gym or financially (that's what I'm doing) then hit the field with a vengeance next spring

Yup. I tend to get SAD this time of year and unmotivated/unstable anyway, so it's generally a poor time for dating or even sleeping around, so I think that's a good idea. There was a girl I was seeing for a month who was super hot and young but she's genuinely crazy and I told her I think I'm done with her but needed time to think about it, and I think I'm gonna stick with that decision and cut her off because if she's already causing me grief after 1 month I cannot imagine what other shvt she's gonna pull down the road. Crazy people are supposed to be able to bottle up their craziness for first 3 months, if she can't even do it for 1 month, she's a nutjob who will only bring me down.

Women met via swipe app are going to be the absolute worst women possible.

They are actively putting themselves out on a dating platform because they couldn't solve their dating lives through any real life method. Their day-to-day routines aren't putting them in contact with enough men who are asking them out in person or the men that are asking them out are somehow not acceptable to them.

There are a lot of ways that a woman can meet a man in real life who would be an acceptable boyfriend. She could meet him through any of the following ways (not an exhaustive list, but will cover major ones):

My take is that many otherwise "normal" women get on OLD for attention/validation/boredom relief or from her single friends egging her on. And I think if you manage to these women at the right time they might say "oh, I'll give it a shot" with him. A small handful have even told me I was the first guy they replied to or went on a date with on OLD, and I believe it. I don't think they're ALL crazy or broken, but to hit gold is extremely rare and is quite literally akin to finding a needle in a haystack, and the ROI is probably lower than traditional means of meeting women.

OP sounds like you and are alike in that sense. You are become more mature and realize that people are flawed but not judging them for said flaws. It doesn't mean you're gullible or a sucker It just means you see human nature for what it is, it's imperfect. I will say these types of women can be very mentally draining as it takes energy to deal with them. A lot of people don't realize but there is a metaphysical level of consciousness and attraction that most in this forum have no nuance about because it takes an open mind to delve into these parts (strangely a lot of RP members have no issues believing in the red pill and blue mill analogy but the spiritual aspects get lost on them). These types of women are IMO Aare fun in bed not worth it. It will just lead you down to a road of being jaded, mentally exhausted, etc. OLD is filled with women for the most part who can't hack it in real life cause they are exposed for who they really are hence men who know them personally don't want anything to do with them. I know a couple of women if you saw their profile you would say "damns he is hot why is she on here?"

I agree. It does just lead to mental exhaustion, and that net result is all that matters. The thing is, the last 2 women I was were women I recognized as NOT LTR material, and only saw them as FWB, so I don't understand why I still even care about things like hot to cold/mixed signals, pattern distuptions, it drives me crazy even with girls I don't see a serious future with.

Can you talk more about the metaphysical/spirutual comment you made?

 

[Glassguy]

Men can move past trauma and find normalcy easier than women imo.
Men can go from playing the field, spinning plates to being in a committed relationship. When women start getting tossed around, fvcked and tossed, they get permanently damaged.
Men can leave a toxic relationship and get their bearings back. Women seem to crave toxicity after being in a longer toxic relationship.

I believe men can rewrite their script easier than women. Women tend to let things get engrained easier than men.

So when you are dating in your late 20s, 30s, 40s and beyond, most women have become completely fvcked up emotionally from past relationships and trauma. You can screen them harder all you want. Some are good at hiding it and some will tell you covertly how messed up they are on date 1 if you pay attention.
The only thing you can do is play the game and use her for what she's worth if you're strong enough to be able to quickly walk away, or RUN at the first signs that a woman is whacked in the head.