sageproduct's senior year field reports.

[Sofomore]

Hey man Ive been reading the majority of this. I know its hard to muster confidence when you havent kissed a girl yet.

Here are some things you need to do:
1. Check to see if any girl that you have spent over 10 hours with is in your "sights". To be blunt, you need to abandon hope with these girls. They are FRIENDS. Trust me, you are deep in the friend zone with these girls. They do not see you as a sexual being, so you should NOT waste your time on them. Its harsh, but true.

2. Lower your standards for now. Being a senior in highschool popularity obviously is a big deal. You need to be preparing for the big leagues- college. If you want to have any chance with hot chicks in college you need to get some experience under your belt. Now, this is a double edged sword...get laid, but also lose some value. This is something you should consider.

3. Look in the mirror and name EVERYTHING you like about yourself. This builds confidence on massive levels. I like where you are going with everything but to get up there you need to see yourself as a sexual being before girls can. Start thinking with your ****! If a girl gives you a compliment, take it!!! Dont pvssyfoot around and say "No youre better than me!" Say..."DAMN RIGHT IM THE BEST!!"

Hope this helps.

 

[sageproduct]

Hey man, thanks for the post. Looking back, over 50% of the content in my posts are about girls i'm LJBF with, but I'm just mainly getting some practice with them.

Currently, I think the only girls that are within target range and that I care enough for are Paula H and maaaybe Binny K. Sharon C was but she showed too little interest so I nexted her. Gotta meet some girls that are more prospect-y and less friend-y.

Update, stuff that happened after school today.

Binny K

I was just chillin not doing much when Binny K sent me a really random text. She had given me a ride home from school today and her text seemed like a pointless conversation starter off an inside joke because it didn't even really make sense. It was something about her car being spotless. However, I just went along with it and we had another fluff convo via texting that was just about both of us making stuff up. After a while of this, I decided that I had nothing better to do so I told her I was going to Jewel (which there really was no need for me to) and asked if she wanted to come with. She asked what I was going for and I gave her a fluff answer and she said "sure if it's a semi quick trip."

I pick her up and we go. I was a little frustrated because I could not find ANY way to do kino without just being completely awkward. Her energy level didn't seem right for it. Our conversation really was decent and I worked in some C & F but most of it wasn't really teasing her, it was just making fun of other people. She was laughing but it was just like normal conversation laughing, nothing where she was like dying of laughing and on a high, otherwise I would have jumped on that kino opportunity.

Actually I got a little in at one point. She told me to feel some bath brush so I did, and I took it out and brushed her back a few times with her and she laughed. Overall, when I gave her cues to hold eye contact she wouldn't hold it, and she just didn't seem very sexual to me. I think I did alright and my own interest level in her was lowered. She was just following me around and walked behind me a lot (when that happens I should keep walking and make her catch up instead of waiting for her, right?) She just bored me a little and didn't seem very playful.

New encounter
Mel K (NOT mel kiper.)
Kind of a strange thing happened. Last year I had one-itis with a girl who I only talked to online (****ty ass story). Mel K was her friend. A week before school started this year, my one-itis and Mel K both facebook chatted me at almost the same time, asking me what period I had a certain class. Both mentioned the other, I think. I had a little convo with Mel K, which was weird because I had never talked to her or even seen her before.

Never heard of her again until tonight. She chatted me for some assignment that's due in Friday (we have the class in different periods) and we ended up talking a little. I didn't have anything to tease her about but we had a normal conversation for a little bit. Then I decided what the heck, and said I had to go do hw and just plain asked for her number. She gave it to me, easy. I'm supposed to text her when I figure out the assignment (she wants me to do it tonight since she doesn't have time tomorrow but I think I'm gonna wait til tomorrow anyway).

Just felt like sharing that, the AFC in me would never have asked for the number. Maybe that'll go somewhere....? Haha highly unlikely but I looked at her pics and I guess she's attractive enough. She's a year younger btw.

 

[sageproduct]

Thursday, 10/22/09

A little texting convo with that girl who Facebook chatted me randomly yesterday

sageproduct: Hey Mel K did you end up figuring out the assignment?
her: No I decided not to do it last night haha. Did you decide how you're doing it?
me: Oh yaa too busy today aren't you, I see (yesterday she told me she wanted to finish it yesterday even though its not due til tomorrow because she was too busy today)...well I'm doing it [blah blah blah]
her: Haha yes exactly. Ah are you kidding? You realize that's the opposite of what you said yesterday!
me: Ya well yesterday would have been too easy. I want something...closer to a challenge.
her: Haa really? How much is this even worth?? Ah ok so now im back at the beginning...What do I do? Thank you oh so much.
me: Aren't you spoiled expecting me to do all the work and then piggybacking...even tho copying me pretty much guarantees perfection, of course.
her: Hah no not at all you were just supposed to help me not do it for me but hey if you're offering...And hm yeah right i bet ill get a better grade on this than you haha
me: Its on miss smarty pants. Give me a call in like 15 min and we'll talk about the essay (I mean just mine since its better) I'm busy right now (i wasn't busy haha)
her: Oh so your just gonna help me beat you? How sweeet
me: you need all the help you can get

 

[sageproduct]

Friday, 10/23/09

Reeeeeeally long day. I went to state with the entire girls' tennis team. Started out a little tired and not in the best mood, so I feel like my humor was ****y without the funny because no one seemed to respond well to it.

We split up after a couple hours (long boring bus ride, semi-fun stop at target) and I ended up with an assistant coach, my sister, her 8th grade friend, and Binny K (powderpuff). I spent pretty much the whole day with them, so really just Binny K.

Really the only development here is that I have nexted Binny K. She is simply unresponsive. Doesn't hold eye contact, doesn't return kino. It doesn't matter to me if this is due to low interest level or if she just doesn't know what to do.

When we arrived at our location in the small group, we hung out and **** for about half an hour when I turned my head left and noticed what seemed like a REALLY hot italian-looking girl from another school. My head was continuously turning but we made eye contact, which I would have held if my head wasn't already turning.

It was really quiet so approaching her right there would have been weird (my excuse) but I made a note of the HB and her friend from her school. At one point they were standing behind me (a tv was in front of me) and the HB's friend asked her something about what was on tv, and I turned around and answered for them because I actually did know the answer.

They nodded, I held eye contact a little and then turned back around. (leak in my game here.) However, I overhear them wanting to play catchphrase, which Binny K happened to have with her. I turned again and asked directly, "Wait do you guys wanna play catchprase with us?" Binny K seems annoyed at first but we end up playing.

When we were playing, I was sitting on the edge of fireplace and HB sat to the left of me but on the floor. I kinoed her upper arm a few times and tried to tease her but didn't really find anything to do it well on. She didn't give me much eye contact (and actually didn't seem as hot as I thought she was before). When the game ended she and her friend left.

Even though I saw her friend a couple times throughout the day, I didn't go any further. I should have asked for her name, right? At the time my mind was saying that she should volunteer her name herself so that I wouldn't have to ask for it. I should have tried a number close too but I felt awkward in front of the people I was with.

 

[sageproduct]

Rest of Friday, 10/23/09

Haunted House with Binny K, Kristina K, another girl on the tennis team who has a bf, a friend, a girl who's a dude, and a psycho girl. Lots of kino. Didn't say goodbye to anyone when I should have gave goodnight hugs. Should have gotten Kristina K's number.

Saturday, 10/24/09
Was driving 5 guys to Petunia K's party downtown. They're supposed to be my closest group at my school except one kid we don't like cuz he's a fag. All AFCs. My one friend passes out suddenly and starts puking. It becomes evident that he's drunk. We take him to the hospital cuz the other kid we don't like demands it. Suddenly I get accused of drunk driving cuz the kid who passed out woke up saying that everyone except the other kid was drinking. I didn't have a drop. Gay. Now what the ****, this has nothing to with girls...

 

[sageproduct]

Monday, 10/26/09

I felt really outgoing and social today for some reason. Kino came naturally and I made good conversation. Saw Paula H (good personality girl) she told me something serious. Don't really have time to say more.

 

[sageproduct]

Wednesday, 10/28/09

Was crazy busy yesterday so I didn't post. The only thing I remember from yesterday was just solid staring down this really really hot junior girl during a passing period, and I kept thinking about wanting to **** her after that.

Paula H closest thing to a target right now
Saw her a few times but only walking by in the halls during passing periods, and we didn't say anything except hi. Now I know I need to get her alone and outside of school, and that's where I'm running into some roadblocks. That bowling thing with the little kids last week was a good idea but she couldn't go, and I need to come up with something now to see her outside of school...

General Observations
A few things I've noticed over the past week or so but didn't want to bring up until now:
-I feel like I'm a much better conversationalist now. Before I kept thinking everything I say has to be something funny/witty and I always just ended up saying something dumb or taking too long to respond. I'm really using everything the other person says to continue the conversation, and I've discovered that body language and tone really trumps whatever you are actually saying.
-Along with conversational skills, I've learned C & F isn't an act put on for girls, it's just something that's starting to slowly become part of my personality. I do it no matter who I'm talking to, whether it's a hot girl, an LJBF, a fat girl, a guy, a teacher, or some random stranger.
-I really don't depend on girls at all for happiness and feel more like I am the prize. Today I switched seats randomly in a class with someone and sat in front of who many consider the hottest girl in our grade. Now she's had a bf for about 3 years but the thinking that was in my head was "oh i'll tease her a little bit". I didn't really make her laugh but I didn't suck up to her like a scared ***** like I always did before.
-The point of socializing is just to have a little fun and maybe learn something. I was able to turn almost anything into a joke.
-Kino's coming much more naturally. I started kinoing a girl I'm not even interested in by accident the other day. Much more comfortable with it.
-I can talk to anyone. I'm noticing a lot of different things about strangers and started a couple convos based on what they were doing/wearing and it was completely natural and fun.

Next goal: actually try to meet some random girls. This is still a little awkward for me and I still feel like I need something semi-good to say.

 

[sageproduct]

Last Few Days

Kinda stuck in a limbo period right now. No girls with potential. Gotta change that soon. All I've been doing is practicing on girls who don't matter, practicing C & F, the right attitude, and kino-ing. I realize now that's pretty much all I've written about here so I'm gonna stop writing about practice *****es and really focus on actual prospects.

 

[sageproduct]

Something Important, Finally.

Sunday, 11/1/09

Mel K (junior who randomly fb chatted me)
We had a little bet going over who would get a better grade on a paper, and she won. She texted me yesterday out of the blue to inform me, and I asked her what she wanted and to make use of it because it was her only chance to get something from me. She said I should surprise her, so I said I was going to get ice cream and she could come with me. Hours later, she was still doing hw and said I could owe her another day.

Monday, 11/2/09
I felt like I had a real good DJ attitude today and was really confident with myself. I kino'ed at will and made conversation with whoever I wanted to. This was always with "practice *****es" though, like usual. Until...

Paula H (kickboxing girl, interest)
Something about this girl really intrigues me. Her very average looks are somewhat skewed by the fact that I've never seen her wear something other than a t-shirt or hoodie, and this may sound like BS but for some reason I just feel really attracted to her as a person.

Saw her a couple times in passing periods but didn't have time for anything other than touching her shoulder and saying hi. Then after staying late to make up tests, I found her sitting by herself in the commons area. We started talking lightly a bit, and I excused myself to go get some of my stuff. Then I came back, and my body started responding as well.

I started getting extremely nervous. My legs felt wobbly and I had to consciously stop myself from shaking. This feeling was inexplicable to me and confused me cuz I haven't felt nervous around any girl for a long time after picking up my new attitude. I think I did a good job of holding it in and hiding it, though. I forced myself not to fidget and keep myself still for the most part, and I consciously made myself speak slowly, clearly, and with a confident/****y tone of voice.

I'm pretty glad with how the conversation went. I kept her laughing, but I feel like I laughed a little bit too much myself. I answered a few too many of her questions directly, which I need to change next time. She teased me a bit and I teased her more. Made up fluff talk, and whenever I couldn't think of anything I'd make a joke about her kickboxing.

After about 5-10 minutes, I was waiting for a good "high" moment to eject but she stood up and I also stood up immediately (not good...?) without even thinking. Her ride had arrived and we began walking in opposite directions. I realized I didn't sit close enough to her to kino so I moved in to touch her shoulder to say bye. Then I put on my most confident tone and said authoritatively, "We need to hang out. I never see you around." I can't really remember what her response was, I felt like she was a little weirded out for some reason but then she started telling me about some Christian thing she goes to that I should too on Wednesday and asked me if I go to a church/youth group. Maybe she only goes to youth group and doesn't hang out with people? idk. But I'm glad I overcame my nerves and didn't stutter while talking like I have so many times before.

lol this was 45 minutes ago and my arms are still shaking a bit. wow. i wasn't even consciously aware that i was so interested in this girl. gotta keep it in check. i should be getting over the nerves though.

 

[Big Poppa]

Sunday, 11/1/09

Mel K (junior who randomly fb chatted me)
We had a little bet going over who would get a better grade on a paper, and she won. She texted me yesterday out of the blue to inform me, and I asked her what she wanted and to make use of it because it was her only chance to get something from me. She said I should surprise her, so I said I was going to get ice cream and she could come with me. Hours later, she was still doing hw and said I could owe her another day.

Don't really see anything on with this. It could have been your chance to get a little flirty though.

Monday, 11/2/09
I felt like I had a real good DJ attitude today and was really confident with myself. I kino'ed at will and made conversation with whoever I wanted to. This was always with "practice *****es" though, like usual. Until...

Paula H (kickboxing girl, interest)
Something about this girl really intrigues me. Her very average looks are somewhat skewed by the fact that I've never seen her wear something other than a t-shirt or hoodie, and this may sound like BS but for some reason I just feel really attracted to her as a person.

Saw her a couple times in passing periods but didn't have time for anything other than touching her shoulder and saying hi. Then after staying late to make up tests, I found her sitting by herself in the commons area. We started talking lightly a bit, and I excused myself to go get some of my stuff. Then I came back, and my body started responding as well.

I started getting extremely nervous. My legs felt wobbly and I had to consciously stop myself from shaking. This feeling was inexplicable to me and confused me cuz I haven't felt nervous around any girl for a long time after picking up my new attitude. I think I did a good job of holding it in and hiding it, though. I forced myself not to fidget and keep myself still for the most part, and I consciously made myself speak slowly, clearly, and with a confident/****y tone of voice.

I'm pretty glad with how the conversation went. I kept her laughing, but I feel like I laughed a little bit too much myself. I answered a few too many of her questions directly, which I need to change next time. She teased me a bit and I teased her more. Made up fluff talk, and whenever I couldn't think of anything I'd make a joke about her kickboxing.

After about 5-10 minutes, I was waiting for a good "high" moment to eject but she stood up and I also stood up immediately (not good...?) Not good at all. Should have kinda just leaned back and stared up at her with a relaxed smile or smirk. without even thinking. Her ride had arrived and we began walking in opposite directions. I realized I didn't sit close enough to her to kino so I moved in to touch her shoulder to say bye. Then I put on my most confident tone and said authoritatively, "We need to hang out. I never see you around." I can't really remember what her response was, I felt like she was a little weirded out for some reason but then she started telling me about some Christian thing she goes to that I should too on Wednesday and asked me if I go to a church/youth group. Maybe she only goes to youth group and doesn't hang out with people? idk. But I'm glad I overcame my nerves and didn't stutter while talking like I have so many times before.

]Good job on the kinoing! Bu the shoulder touching might have been a little sudden. Still, it's better then nothing. Thumbs up for the tonation and the authority! It's kind of natural to get a little nervous around a girl your starting to be interested in, don't sweat it. Remember, no matter what your wee little heart is saying, she doesn't deserve a pedestal, and so far, she has nothing to earn your direct interest and time. Keep gaming man!

 

[sageproduct]

Thanks for the feedback man. And yeah haha I'm not putting her above me, for some reason I just subconsciously got super nervous.

Tuesday, 11/3/09
Much of the same. I feel more and more confident each day with my conversational skills and knowing what the "right" thing to say with girls is. Plus, kino is becoming more natural. Given, this is still mostly with girls who are practice btiches to me.

On days like today where not much happened, I think I'll just make this a more general journal with various observations and concerns. There's really not much point I guess in talking about who I kinoed today and who I made eye contact with.

Also, idk how many have read the masturbation forum here in The Archive but everyone there strangely was talking about how life is so much better when they don't do it...I didn't buy it, but I haven't since Friday and I guess it really does help me embrace my sexuality I guess. My attitude on a subconscious level before with girls was "please don't think i'm a creeper", and now it's more "i'd **** you if you deserve it." I feel like I truly care much less about what the girls think. I don't care if they think I'm horny now, I WANT them to know!!!!

haha but seriously, i do feel positive effects of not jacking off.

 

[sageproduct]

Update

Well I was typing something up about some random asian girl who pseudo approached me, but I decided not to post it up because I'm not interested in her and I didn't get her number so I was like what's the point of posting it. I felt like I easily could have but didn't want to cuz of a number of weird things. Plus her ugly friends were right there and I felt weird about it, but I did kino her with complete ease. Really feeling much more confident with that.

 

[sageproduct]

Wednesday, 11/4/09

I've had a recent surge of confidence recently. For some reason, I'm getting a feeling that I'm doing everything right, and this is leading me to not really wanting to post. However, I need to constantly improve. Now that my inner game has taken a step up, I need to work on ways to really meet more girls. With girls I already know, I'm kinoing a lot and being C & F just naturally now, but I'm still dropping the ball sometimes with strangers. Some cues have been missed. And when I see Paula H in the hall I need to actually talk to her instead of just saying hi.

 

[sageproduct]

Thursday, 11/5/09

Still feeling good about my actual behavior and my attitude with girls. I feel confident in knowing what I am supposed to do, where before I would always wonder about what the right thing to say/do should have been.

The next biggest thing I need to work on isn't really covered in the bible because it's more high school specific. A lot of times when you see a girl in the halls you'll be in a rush so there might not be time for a number close (or i dont know how to do it so fast). Basically what I need to work on is just making plans to hang out. I've gone through the phase of needing to just chill in order to know that I'm fine by myself; now that I've established I don't NEED anyone, I do WANT to be with people so I'm gonna work on that. Make plans to hang out, go out, whatever.

 

[sageproduct]

FVCK FVCK FVCK FVCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, 11/6/09

I don't even know really what just happened.

It has to do with Binny K. She was a girl who I talked about a few times before and marked as maybe possibly having an interest in me. I hung out with her a few weeks ago when I went with the girls tennis team to watch state, and if anyone remembers I nexted her because she seemed too asexual and unresponsive toward my kino and wouldn't kino me back.

So I hadn't really talked to her for the last couple weeks except she would really enthusiastically call my name when I saw her at school. Today I was just chillin at home cuz all my friends are grounded and I didn't really want to go to the football game. At about 8:45 Binny K texts me that she misses me and tells me to go to the game. I'm not complying with her of course so I say i'm busy and use C & F by saying maybe if she's lucky she'll get to see me.

She ends up picking me up from her house with her friend and go back to her house. I had no idea of these plans at all. At 10 her friend says she has to leave, and almost right after Binny K tells me to go up to her room with her.

fvvvvvvvvvvck it's not til now that I realized how planned this whole thing might have been. FVCK!! She had some music going, just really calm music that gets you in a certain mood...we were alone in her room and I made sure to kino her a lot. She responded positively but didn't really kino me back. I was kind of caught here not knowing what to do, because like I explained before I just assumed i was LJBF with her. Dammit!!! We did hold eye contact for long periods of time and I would break away. I kept telling myself I should go for it but with her I didn't want to that much. A million things were going through my head. Every single moment I thought about kissing her I felt too awkward to do it. Our conversation was a really friendly one and I just completely lost myself in trying to sexualize it even subtlely. Note I'm not really attracted to her but at this point I'm trying to get all that I can. Each time, I broke away cuz I felt uncomfortable. She eventually sat on her bed and I sat by her sometimes but kept moving around, put my arm around her sometimes. Then her parents came home and she freaked out for like a split second.

We went downstairs and I talked to her parents for a bit (first time i'd ever met them). Then I realized that I didn't drive there so I asked her for a ride home. By now I did get the hint that she may have interest in me, so I plan to have her walk me to my house and then go for the kiss.

We get to my house and I made the lamest excuse for her to come up with me, it had something to do with an inside joke we have but she said "are you serious?" and went along with it and came outside with me. I made a little more normal conversation and then I started feeling awkward. I said "well i gotta go now" and moved in to hug her. This was all ok.
(note:I have never kissed a girl and that shold have changed today.)
Then while breaking away I slid my hands down to her waist cuz I read about doing that and started moving in for the kiss. Her eyes were right on me and in a split second it just got really weird in my mind, I couldn't believe what I was doing, I just went past her head to the other side and hugged her again. She made some kind of noise that I can't even remember but it was like awkward. Then I said cya and didn't even look back at her. what the fvck!!!!!!! i'm so mad at myself right now

 

[BongDuy]

okay, from personal experience which im sure you're fully aware of, i can tell you this is perfectly normal. It's trial and error. Keep in mind that you've never kissed a girl before, so its kinda expected of you to choke. I mean, it would of been very nice if you kissed her then and there, but i can totally associate with you 110% my advice to you is to prepare yourself next time. When you feel like you two are ready to kiss, or if you're EVER alone with her in her ROOM, count from 3- 2 -1, and then kiss her.

think of it this way, REJECTION is 10000000x better then REGRET.

 

[sageproduct]

Yeah all true, thanks a lot man. I've kinda calmed down a bit now and I guess it wasn't that bad. I believe she's really inexperienced herself so she may not even be sure of what happened so I guess it's salvageable? Plus that would explain why she didn't return my kino before when she actually was interested.

I was TOTALLY unprepared. I was literally chilling at home in my sleep clothes planning to stay in for the night, and 15 minutes later I was alone with a girl I thought was LJBF when her parents weren't home.

Also I can't remember if I mentioned this but when I was alone with her and realized the situation, I started desperately trying to think of ways to make the conversation sexual but just didn't feel comfortable doing it. I kept it way too friendly and that made me feel weird. I even tried the kiss test thing where I brushed her hair but didn't even follow it up with anything.

So weird cuz only for like 3 days 2 weeks ago was I thinking that maaaaaaaybe she was a target, and even then I didn't care for her too much. I just honestly want to get that first kiss out of the way.


Edit: To make matters worse

The last thing I want now is everybody talking about how I was about to kiss this girl but failed at the last moment. I was holding on to some thin hope that Binny K doesn't realize what happened, but......
at 11:15 I get a text from this girl who both Binny K and I are good friends with.
her: hey sageproduct
at this point i'm thinking oh ****...but i do my best to act like a real dj and a real man would
me: eeeey sup dude
blah blah blah
her: just askin you what went down tonight...heard some stuff about you and wanted to see what really happened
me: hah whatd you hear about me?
her: somethin about you at the football game. wanna share?
me: me at the football game that I never went to? (this is true, i didn't go to the game but i already knew what she was getting at....and thinking fvck.)
her: huh? i heard you had a thing with a girl but they wouldn't tell me who she was. what happened? (i highly doubt she doesn't know that it was with Binny K. After all, she would be the only person who would know about it...)
me: well i wasn't even at the game and i'm not sure who i've been having a "thing" with? (pretty much lying now and faking ignorance, i didn't know how to balance between not compromising my rep and not being a lying btich...)
her: maybe i miss heard them. maybe the said i all happened before/after the football game instead of at. either way, anything you wanna tell me?
me: I'm gay...(weak joke) wait **** not ready for that yet. maybe it would help if you said who "they" are unless you're not supposed to...
her: not suppose to. But i heard you almost kissed someone.....? Who?!??
me: Hah whatev, ya i guess but it didn't happen (i was pissed at myself immediately after i sent this.)
her: who?! what happened?? no one is tellin me anything!!
me: (try to regain ground) what the heck hah idk what ur freakin out about
her: cuz your my bro! i gotta protect ya! do you like this mystery girl? can i know who she is??
me: hah wow
her: what?
at this point i couldn't think of anything that was worded perfectly enough, so i decided the best thing to do would just be to stop replying.


Oh, and I just also realized that they're leaving at 6am tomorrow to visit a college. Binny K's gonna read the whole text convo. I'm glad I played it cool without downright lying...i think?

On the plus side, I guess it's good that my game was good enough to create attraction in her, since I've really only interacted with her after being introduced to this site...now it's time to realize that I have a penis and testicles and that yes, girls do want them.

 

[sageproduct]

Sunday, 11/8/09 My first kiss (yeah it finally happened.)

So I thought all was lost with Binny K after Friday's ****up until she texed me last night from some party at a college. I was pretty busy so it always took me between 5-15 min to respond to her texts. It was just another usual funny joking convo that we usually have. Then today I texted her asking something then was busy for an hour and got two texts from her, 20 minutes apart.

Well, I thought, all is not lost. I texted her saying I had to run some errands asking if she wanted to come with me. Then realized I had no errands to run, so I directly told her I was taking her to get ice cream without asking. She agreed, and I ended up like half an hour late to pick her up cuz I got stuck talking to this kid's parents but I told her the story after I picked her up and she laughed.

We got to Oberweis (my decision) and everything was fine, we were making pretty good convo except I felt like my C & F was just a little off and I was giving her a little too much information and direct answers. When we actually got the ice cream, she made no motion at all to get money and I paid without a word. Did I mess up here? (my good buddies who are not AFC said it means she wants my **** but i'm not sure if it was the right move) As soon as we were done eating, I said I had to go cuz I was going to watch SNF with some good friends (the not fag-AFC ones I have.)

When we got to her house, I walked outside with her. We stopped in front of her garage where she was gonna go in and turned face to face with each other and talked for a short bit, making eye contact the whole time. Then she said "Well I'm gonna go watch Desperate Housewives..." so I hugged her and said I had fun and slid my hands down to her lower back again.

As the hug broke I felt her pulling away but I didn't let her. I looked right at her, pulled her in and kissed. It was a short peck and afterward, I had no idea what to do cuz all my "preparation" was just getting ready to do the kiss, so I ended up just hugging her again. I'm guessing I should have went back in and made out with her here?

After a more passionate hug, we said bye and were walking away. Here's where I think I ****ed up. I got too excited and for some reason just turned and blurted to her, "Do you wanna work out with me on tuesday?" and even stumbled a little bit. She looked a little confused then said "I'll think about it."

 

[BongDuy]

Was the kiss forced? did she seem to comply or did you kamikaze kiss her lips? Reminds me of my kiss with Brenda in my FR lmao

 

[sageproduct]

Hahaha, nah I'm pretty sure it wasn't. I've unconsciously replayed it in my mind too many times since Sunday so my memory's a little distorted but when I kept my hands on her back after hugging she got the idea and even came towards me.

Monday, 11/9/09 and Tuesday, 11/10/09
Didn't see Binny K (first kiss) at all at school either of these days. Before, I wouldn't really notice or remember if I saw her during the day but now obviously I do. She texted me last night but told me about some car accident she saw. I was mature about it but tried to change the subject as quickly as I could. Then also told her I'm working out today and that she jusssst might be coole enough to come with me but she's busy today. I ended the convo after a little while, saying I was going to get ready to sleep.

Here's where I'm feeling just a little unsure of myself now. I feel much more confident talking to and interacting with girls, but of anything involving relationships I still know very little. We've kissed (once) but that doesn't mean we're necessarily going out already, so how much attention should I give her? I know I shouldn't be needy by texting her a lot but most convos we have are initiated by her. Should I show a little IL and take a step toward the bf/gf stage by initiating texts just a little?