DavenJuan said:
Tisk Tisk... read entire thread before posting..or maybe you have, and you just dont appreciate grammer enough to be able to comprehend..so let me reiterate a few things...
First, When i posted my OP I didnt ever once say that i was disgusted/upset about the fact she slept with this other guy. I simply laid some background and wanted to see if anyone has been in a similiar situation.
I REPEAT...i could care less who she slept with before me, it was in the past and really has no reflection on our relationship. now if you asked me if i would have been upset 4 years ago before i came to this site, i would have a completely different answer.
When i mentioned something about her and mr. f*ck buddy, i never expected her to "tell all" about her encounters prior to me. I didnt expect her to say yes..really it mattered little whatever her response was. My reasoning for saying something was for her to think that i know anyway without her having to tell me. Another reason for mentioning it to her was to let her know that it isnt that big of a deal if she has slept with him.
I mentioned something about it, gave a quick "i know everything cause im god smile", we went to the next bar and continued our night. she felt a bit akward like i cant believe he can tell, but the night went on. The only regret is giving her that false sense of sexual tension with this other guy that i created.
Also...on me "sneaking around looking for this diary"...i dont spend my time snooping around looking for reasons to not be with my gf. It is completely irrelevant why, how, or even where i found it..what is relevant is that i opened it up and started to read pages.
My gf is a bartender and around men everyday. She flirts to make money for a living. I think it would be incredibly hard to mantain a realtionship over a year if im "a controlling jelous goon"..or for me to even "look" that way.
If i was worried about my gf cheating on me, not trusting her, blah blah..then i would be wasting my time in these forums and in my relationship. I KNOW people cheat, if she decides to move on, her loss not mine.
Hit a nerve did I?
It is clear you are not going to dump this girl, so i suggest you put this cra8 behind you and work out on becoming the man where by if she cheats she will regret it, so far from your first post, if she sucks on joe's coc*, you have a part to play in that by feeding your jelouse anger.
Oh as for grammer this is a dating forum, largly for AFC dudes who cant fuc* or score to save there lives, i really dont give a toss if my grammer is perfect or not. oh and your grammer is pritty tur* also!
Listen or not, you still have a long way to go, carry on like this and dont be at all suprised when you discover you GF actions are not consistant with her words, whislt you keep pushing her Interest Level lower and lower.
me:"Whats up with you and joe...? i can tell by your body language that he was more to you than just yoru ex bfs best friend...did you ever mess around with him....?
her: NO...(comes in to give me a hug for reassurance)
me: i can tell by your response to my question that there is more that your not telling me???
her: your retarded..i never did anything with him...why would you even think that?
me: OMG, you did fool around with this guy, did you f*ck him? that disgusting knowing that you were with his bestfriend!
her: i swear i never did anything with him!
Never ever do what you did above, shame since the majority on here are simply telling you to carry on with your jelouse agenda, i will give your relationship a few months. Either that or you buckle down, either dump her for what you have found out or stop reducing her IL until she goes and Fuc*'s joe and the guy from work.
Your GF is full of redflags, but your actions are fuc*ing poor also.
Are you scanning her MSpace/facebook and other things to 'catch her out'?
No one likes to walk on egg shells, eventually one will crack you keep pushing the buttons of mistrust and she 'will' most probably 'fuc*' joe when he lends her an ear to how much or a controlling jelouse guy her BF is turning out to be.
Also your actions are not concurent with your words, hence if they where this would never have been posted.
You need to take a step back from yourself, get yourself into check and judge your GF on her actions, what you should never do is turn the situation where by you almost force her to fuc* some other dude, which in all fairness is what you are doing.
Control your jelousy and reclaim your prize mentality, joe is nothing, any guy she ever has dealings with is 'nothing' they only become something when you have clear indicators of disrespect build on mutual trust, so far you are not respecting your GF boundries and enforcing your jelouse agenda her way, hence you are no longer seeing yourself has the prize, you are seeing yourself as a 'victim'. If she fuc*s another man this should never be at the discretion of your faults, this is just an indicator of her character, dont excuse her bad behaviour, but sadly her bad behaviour is a product of your victim mentality hence your GF actions are not seen to be a product of her character, but more intune with a lower interest level in the BF who is acting like some whiny brat who is really fuc*ing pushing his luck.
Let no man deframe you, even if you know before you met her he fuc*ed her ten ways from sunday, at the end of the day, you are the one fuc8ing her now. This guy is simply relegated to beg status, the last thing you do is take the position of the guy on the bench, your her fuc*ing BF, if she does other actions, where by she spends 'alone' time with an ex FB then you have a problem, but introducing you and then for you to act like some victim to an hidden fuc*k agenda tells me you need to get your shi* into perspective.
I dont care how rich, good looking, hot, nice car he drives, never see him as a threat not with your GF around, infact see him as simply nothing more then a 'try hard', unless ofc your women is making sure indicators of wanting him around, then thats another problem entirely. you should be friendly and upfront with him, until actions 'state otherwise' so far your actions are concurent with a paranoid victim mentality.
Now if you came on here and said you GF is spending time with Joe and you happened to find a diary where she writes she and him where FB, i would give you a different post, but so far there is nothing to show this is going on 'yet'.
Unless you want to divulge more info, what is your gut saying? oh and stop with the BS, your reply post (and you know it) was BS, time to be upfront and honest, you dont know anyone here its just a forum.
