Pug's 100 approach journal

[Pugsley_f5]

Also I forgot to add that if you do beat around the bush like that in a approach and you have the type of fear that I did , that fear is never going to go away unless you combat the thing you fear the most.....what other people think. Beating round the bush just gives that fear a safeplace to hide and seek shelter.

Pugs

 

[Pugsley_f5]

Day 3 Approaches 7+8+9

Hey fellas,

I know you all are waiting for a post about last night.....I went out to the old "regulars" last night Borders and Barnes and Nobles.....

I got to Borders and hung out for a bit, I saw a really attractive dirty Blonde HB8 that was a little older....maybe 25-6 she was hot though....the only problem is the first one of the night is the hardest one to do, after that it's a piece of pootang(pie!). I observed her for about 15 mins and then she moved and went somewhere else in the store....I finally decided it was time for my "left" and "right" regulators to "Mount UP!" and I started walking like a man on a mission to find her and approach her....well she vanished like a ghost and I couldn't find her, but I did see another hottie that was stationary and after about 1 min of thinking (it's gettting better!) I walked up to her and heres how the convo went

Me: Hey how are you doing? (Noticed I changed it a bit)

Her: Good and you?

Me: I'm Awesome, Hey you mind if I ask you a question?
Her: UHHH, Sure (the look on her face was priceless, she had a look and sound in her voice like she was saying "OMG, this guy is going to propose to me or something crazy like that" Almost like she didn't want to here my question.

Me: Are you single?

Her: Smiling, no im not, sorry

Me: Ok well it was good meeting you then, I'm Chris BTW and reached out my hand.

Her: Im so and so

Me: Have a good night so and so

Her: Bye bye

After that I waited around the store and saw another cutie, kinda ghetto booty, I prolly wouldnt continue dating her unless she didn't have a kick a*s personality.....I waited for the opportune time to approach and whaddya know it didn't DANGIT!

I went to B+N and walked around a bit feeling like a loser for choking twice in Borders....and I was like "theres no way I'm going out for 4 hours and only have 1 approach to tell the crew about tommorow."

*Spotted* a VERY cute 8 brunette at a standalone table out in the open (remember I don't like these situations) and after about 30 secs of manuevering I was walking down the aisle that she was looking down and as I walked up to her I put a big smile on and said:

Me: Hey how are you doing?

Her: Really smiley and bubblely she said "Really good"

Me: and then she realised I wasn't walking past her but up to her " and I said " You mind if I ask you a question"?

Her: Yeh sure

Me: "Are you single"?

Her: after a little hesitation she said she wasn't single, but was still very bubbly and friendly.

Me: 'Ok, well it was good meeting you anyways, my name is Chris" and stretched out my hand

Her: I'm colleen it was good meeting you...

Me: You too, you have a good night

Her: You too

I just put a chink in that fear's armor right there, I hate stand alone table situations, makes very very uncomfortable being in the "Open".....Man it felt good to kick that fear in the Nads and say " Take that biznitch"

The last approach of the night, the store was about to close and I saw a cute HB 7.5 sitting down on the floor on an aisle studying and I waited for a worker to get out from the aisle behind her so I wouldn't get in trouble for "solicitation" or some bullcrap like that.....he left I walked up to her as she was packing up and just started walking down the aisle and I said:

Me: Hey how are you doing?

Her: "Good"

Me: "Hey you mind If I ask you a question?"

Her: "No"

Me: Lol I was smiling alot at her cause it was funny "No, I can't?"

Her: Laughes, "No, I mean go ahead"

Me: "Are you single?"

Her: No sorry, I have a boyfriend...

Me: Ok, I just wanted to make sure, It was good meeting you anyways....My name is Chris

Her: *Shakes my hand* Hi, I'm Ann

Me: It was good meeting you, you have a good evening.

Her: You too


Onto day 4!!!!!

 

[Ever onward]

Don't you ever feel strange hanging around the same places so much? I'm always afraid I'll get kicked out for loitering or that everyone who works there will think I'm a perv.

I went to B+N and walked around a bit feeling like a loser for choking twice in Borders....and I was like "theres no way I'm going out for 4 hours and only have 1 approach to tell the crew about tommorow."

Can I be part of your crew? I'm pretty fly for a white guy?

Anyways, I feel the same way as you do about being direct. If you beat around the bush your just approaching without really "approaching". But you seem to not get many numbers. Try changing up a few things. Maybe say something funny to start off the conversation. If you can get em laughing that is a huge plus.

keep up the good work!

onward,

 

[milkman]

Re: Day 3 Approaches 7+8+9

Originally posted by Pugsley_f5
Hey fellas,

I know you all are waiting for a post about last night.....I went out to the old "regulars" last night Borders and Barnes and Nobles.....

I got to Borders and hung out for a bit, I saw a really attractive dirty Blonde HB8 that was a little older....maybe 25-6 she was hot though....the only problem is the first one of the night is the hardest one to do, after that it's a piece of pootang(pie!). I observed her for about 15 mins and then she moved and went somewhere else in the store....I finally decided it was time for my "left" and "right" regulators to "Mount UP!" and I started walking like a man on a mission to find her and approach her....well she vanished like a ghost and I couldn't find her, but I did see another hottie that was stationary and after about 1 min of thinking (it's gettting better!) I walked up to her and heres how the convo went

Me: Hey how are you doing? (Noticed I changed it a bit)

Her: Good and you?

Me: I'm Awesome, Hey you mind if I ask you a question?
Her: UHHH, Sure (the look on her face was priceless, she had a look and sound in her voice like she was saying "OMG, this guy is going to propose to me or something crazy like that" Almost like she didn't want to here my question.

Me: Are you single?

Her: Smiling, no im not, sorry

Me: Ok well it was good meeting you then, I'm Chris BTW and reached out my hand.

Her: Im so and so

Me: Have a good night so and so

Her: Bye bye

After that I waited around the store and saw another cutie, kinda ghetto booty, I prolly wouldnt continue dating her unless she didn't have a kick a*s personality.....I waited for the opportune time to approach and whaddya know it didn't DANGIT!

I went to B+N and walked around a bit feeling like a loser for choking twice in Borders....and I was like "theres no way I'm going out for 4 hours and only have 1 approach to tell the crew about tommorow."

*Spotted* a VERY cute 8 brunette at a standalone table out in the open (remember I don't like these situations) and after about 30 secs of manuevering I was walking down the aisle that she was looking down and as I walked up to her I put a big smile on and said:

Me: Hey how are you doing?

Her: Really smiley and bubblely she said "Really good"

Me: and then she realised I wasn't walking past her but up to her " and I said " You mind if I ask you a question"?

Her: Yeh sure

Me: "Are you single"?

Her: after a little hesitation she said she wasn't single, but was still very bubbly and friendly.

Me: 'Ok, well it was good meeting you anyways, my name is Chris" and stretched out my hand

Her: I'm colleen it was good meeting you...

Me: You too, you have a good night

Her: You too

I just put a chink in that fear's armor right there, I hate stand alone table situations, makes very very uncomfortable being in the "Open".....Man it felt good to kick that fear in the Nads and say " Take that biznitch"

The last approach of the night, the store was about to close and I saw a cute HB 7.5 sitting down on the floor on an aisle studying and I waited for a worker to get out from the aisle behind her so I wouldn't get in trouble for "solicitation" or some bullcrap like that.....he left I walked up to her as she was packing up and just started walking down the aisle and I said:

Me: Hey how are you doing?

Her: "Good"

Me: "Hey you mind If I ask you a question?"

Her: "No"

Me: Lol I was smiling alot at her cause it was funny "No, I can't?"

Her: Laughes, "No, I mean go ahead"

Me: "Are you single?"

Her: No sorry, I have a boyfriend...

Me: Ok, I just wanted to make sure, It was good meeting you anyways....My name is Chris

Her: *Shakes my hand* Hi, I'm Ann

Me: It was good meeting you, you have a good evening.

Her: You too


Onto day 4!!!!!

Good work again! I am impressed!

Chances are, some women will pretend having a boyfriend. That doesn´t matter at the moment! The more you practice and the more confident you will be and the better finally your BL is, the less this will happen.

I - and I think everyone - can notice the progress in your approaches. So that you are also able to practice the "getting number" part, even if a woman says, she would have a boyfriend, try this:

You: "Are you single?"

She: No sorry, I have a boyfriend.

You: Ah, okay... anyway... I like your shoes [slight smile]... so give me your number and I´ll invite you and your friends to a party sometime and you can introduce me to all your hot single friends... [by saying this pretend searching for something to write and then give her the sh*t like it is the most normal thing in the world one can imagine.] >>> if you want, you can add this during she is writing: "....and add your email too, maybe I´ll only write a mass mail".

Side note: the first three numbers you will receive by doing this: throw them in the next garbage can with a smile >> you will feel good...

 

[Pugsley_f5]

LOL You all are my crew DORK!, I meant about posting on here...........

Milkman, man thats a mouthfull, it might take a bit for me to internalize that lol......I will try it though


Hey you said to make them laugh, maybe I should walk up to the chick and say something like this:


Me: Hey how are you?

Her: Fine

Me: Do you mind if I ask you a question?

Her: Sure

Me: Are you single?

Her: No, sorry I have a boyfriend

Me: Well Im sure you have some hot single friends then..?

Her: and her prolly trying to get out of there will prolly say "No, i don't"

Me: LOL "You don't have any friends"?!!!! LOL

Her: LOL that would definatly get her laughing...I think maybe a playful smack too....



Heres a better one I think it will work like a charm (wink wink sarcasm)

You: "Hi there, I have a magical watch that tells me you arent wearing pant!es."

Her: I AM SOOOO!!!!!!!!

Me: Hmmmm...... *taps my watch face and then shakes it up by my ear like its not working* ........"My watch must be an hour ahead " LOL!!!

Now that would be funny as hell, id prolly get smacked for it though

 

[milkman]

Originally posted by Pugsley_f5


You: "Hi there, I have a magical watch that tells me you arent wearing pant!es."

Her: I AM SOOOO!!!!!!!!

Me: Hmmmm...... *taps my watch face and then shakes it up by my ear like its not working* ........"My watch must be an hour ahead " LOL!!!

Now that would be funny as hell, id prolly get smacked for it though

You are cracking me up man, you tell me my line is a mouthful and then you come up with this >>> LOL... if you can report me that you have said this to ONLY ONE hottie, you will directly receive 5 milkman superstar points....

 

[Pugsley_f5]

LOL does it have to be with a cold approach?
I geuss that would be doable in a club or something but def not a bookstore.....can I do this to a chick friend and get points?

 

[lbfan1638]

hmm

u inspire me...im gonna start doing 100 approaches too now...keep up the great work...mad props to ya

 

[Broham]

Pugs and crew-

I just wanted to let you guys know that I've tried the "are you single" one-liners and they never worked for me. I've always had alot of success building rapport first. Now that doesn't mean you have to do it all the time, hell if a chick digs you, she's gonna give you her # no matter what. That's another thing I wanted to bring up: I assume you're going for #s here. That's a start, but most women will end up flaking on you. That's the brutal and honest truth. To avoid this, I always bring up a date idea. If she says yes, YOU'RE IN. If she says I can't on that day, but I'd love to another time, YOU'RE IN. If she says no, well, that's self explanatory. You see where I'm gettin?

To get to this stage though, you gotta build some trust first. THe girl DOESN'T KNOW YOU and she's not gonna go out with you just cuz she's single! Furthermore, even if you get her #, talking on the phone is one of the worst things you can do to build attraction! There's no eye contact, no kino, no body language at all! I'd rather do this FIRST and get it out of the way instead of trying to convince her over the phone that she likes me! It's not rocket science and this is how alot of DJs on this board get it done (Giovanni, Francisco, tell me if I'm wrong).

I don't want you to abandon your technique, but incorporate other ones and be open minded. Most importantly, develop your own style and make sure you aren't like all the other fools out there.

Peace,

Ham

 

[milkman]

Originally posted by Broham
I just wanted to let you guys know that I've tried the "are you single" one-liners and they never worked for me.

Hmm, how often have you tested it in the last two days? 100x, 10x, 1x??? Seems to be early to give up, doesn´t it? How were the convos exactly going on? Would be interesting to know. What was your attitude by doing this? Was you 100% convinced that you would succeed? >>> ???

Originally posted by Broham
That's a start, but most women will end up flaking on you.
That's the brutal and honest truth.

How can you know? What should I say? Maybe they will actually flake on YOU, but not on me most of the time... and on other people I PERSONALLY know.

Originally posted by Broham
... instead of trying to convince her over the phone that she likes me!

NEVER try to impress a women at the very beginning. Not over the phone and not face-to-face. NEVER.

Originally posted by Broham
Most importantly, develop your own style and make sure you aren't like all the other fools out there.

Developing one´s own style is at most secondly important.
>>> MOST importantly: Develop something, that WORKS for you.

... and direct convos work, maybe not for everyone, and maybe not until you have some experience, but if you do not REALLY TEST to find out: Dude, maybe you´ll mis a chance!

milkman

 

[Mr. Delicious]

Originally posted by Pugsley_f5

Heres a better one I think it will work like a charm (wink wink sarcasm)

You: "Hi there, I have a magical watch that tells me you arent wearing pant!es."

Her: I AM SOOOO!!!!!!!!

Me: Hmmmm...... *taps my watch face and then shakes it up by my ear like its not working* ........"My watch must be an hour ahead " LOL!!!

Now that would be funny as hell, id prolly get smacked for it though

Please, please do that one for me at least one time. If you get scared just think in your head "Do it for Delicious!!!"

 

[david90]

is getting the # just half the battle?

 

[Interpol]

Originally posted by david90
is getting the # just half the battle?

I'd say more like 1/8th the battle.

 

[milkman]

Originally posted by david90
is getting the # just half the battle?

Originally posted by Interpol
I'd say more like 1/8th the battle.

I would say getting the number is almost nothing. Therefore: don´t be scared to go for it!

 

[malliotjaune]

I don't think the point of what Pugs is doing is getting numbers. It's conquering a fear of cold approaching by not beating around the bush, not building rapport etc.

The point is that, hopefully, by the end of 100 approaches of the most open and (n my opinion) most difficult kind, he will have instilled the confidence to build a conversation and start getting the digits.

 

[diplomatic_lie]

Good on ya pugs! This is true courage. And if you get scared about embarrassing yourself, just tell yourself at the end of the day, the women you chatted to won't even remember who you were

Well unless you live in a town of 50 people

 

[Ever onward]

LOL You all are my crew DORK!, I meant about posting on here...........

I knew what you meant, I'm not dense man. I was just bustin' your balls a bit

Anyways, you didn't answer my questions from the other post about if you feel strange being in the same stores for hours and hours day after day.

I don't think the point of what Pugs is doing is getting numbers. It's conquering a fear of cold approaching by not beating around the bush, not building rapport etc.

The point is that, hopefully, by the end of 100 approaches of the most open and (n my opinion) most difficult kind, he will have instilled the confidence to build a conversation and start getting the digits.

I'm all about the direct approach too. But maybe he's being a little too direct. It's almost like this:

Pugs walks up to girl, gets in girls face
Pugs: "Will you go out with me, yes or no, huh huh huh?"

girl: "no, ummmm, I gots a boyfriend"

I know your trying to conquer the fear and that is awesome but there is no reason you can't try to get GOOD at approaching while doing all this.

Be direct but also be smooth. Try some humor, trust me its gold.

Props

 

[cannibustacap]

Have you ever been solicited on the street to buy something. Didn't you feel a bit uncomfortable the moment you were approached.

You knew the person had an agenda and that repelled you didn't it? It may have repelled you before they even opened their mouths

Maybe so maybe not. Maybe if they offered you $1,000,000 you were down with it, as long as they didn't ask you to sign something.

Anyway, I am no grand master here, but I really think girls are the same way:

When a guy approaches a girl with an agenda, the girl can literally smell it and become repelled.

Solution: don't think about your agenda. you know its there, to fùck her or whatever. Regardless, don't think about that agenda.

Anyway, keep it up pugs, you inspire me.

I am a bit out of shape like you too and have the "baby face" thing. I made a thread on it here: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=61881


Anyway, say what you want to the girl I suppose, but in your mind get rid of the agenda. Expect nothing from the girls and stop caring about them. Care about yourself only for now. You are improving yourself.

My 2 Turkish cents.

 

[Pugsley_f5]

Day 4 Approach 10+11

Every one who keeps on saying the redundant " your being too direct" or "your doing this wrong" or " you need to do this instead" You all need to read Mailittojune's post above, once again "NUMBERS ARE THE ICING ON THE CAKE, I DON'T CARE REALLY ABOUT THE INCOME, IM JUST OVERCOMING MY FEARS APPROACHING LIKE THIS" I know exactly once all my fear is gone what type of approach im going to switch to and the results are gonna go thru the roof....BUT NOT RIGHT NOW. The next person who says something like above, is going to get a personalized, dignified, autographed electronic foot up their web as*es...OK?

Breath in.....and OUT, IN and OUT.....ok all better now


To answer your question ever onward, no I don't get weird being at those two same places, I like being there just cause it's comfortable and familiar surroundings, but I still keep my eyes open out on the town so I don't become "accustomed" to there....

I have a good question, I have an Ex who won't leave me alone.....she bugs and is clingy as hell and just won't get over the idea that I don't like her, grr I just want to be left alone and never see her again....any ideas? Couple cow tongues on the doorstep? Flaming pile of crap? any suggestions?


Heres what happened last night, firstly I went to the mall to sample some colognes and hopefully get some sample vials to use, and I have alo been looking for a very unique smell for me, unlike the everyday, everyguy Acqua di Gio, I am a cologne coneiseur (sp) If a girl smells like a million bucks but has average looks its like shes an automatic 8 in my eyes.....Very smell driven, and hence I like to smell good myself. I sampled some really good import stuff, that only one in maybe 15,000 people might have....

Anyways a cute red headed chick was helping me in the mall with some scent reccomendations, an solid 8, I wasn't getting really strong buying vibes at all from her so i passed on asking if she was single (truthfully I was kinda scared, but strong buying vibes was my excuse , I got kinda the same feeling like I did with the chick I got the number from the other day, negative buying signals, maybe I should have taken that as a go ahead to ask her since it turned out good the first time.

After that I went to Borders and saw a solid, cute high 7, low eight dirty blonde chick, shy like I like them, but friendly.....I went to the reference pc which was 10 feet behind her and No more than 20 secs later (YES, I'm getting better!!) I walked past her behind her and said "Excuse" and heres how the convo went:

Me: "Excuse me" as I walked past her...

Her: "Sorry about that"

Me: after I walked past her " How are you doing today"?

Her: "Good and you"?

Me: "I'm doing awesome, You mind if I ask you a question?"

Her: She was giving definite buying signals, smiling and blushing when I said hi. "Sure"

Me: "Are you single"?

Her: "Yesss (kinda like stumbled when she said it)"

Me: "Really?...Well I was just about to head out why don't you give me your number and I'll call you sometime"? (as I did it I reached into my jacket pocket and realized I had my other jacket on and I didn't have my card, or my pen, or any paper DOH!)

And me screwing around trying to find the stuff that wasn't there, gave her enough time to start making up a story about shes seeing a guy that she really likes and she's technically not single, bad liar, it was my fault I didn't get a number, I screwed up I should have gotten that, you live and learn , NEXT!!!!!!!

Man fellas I had the best idea yet for approaching this chick who was very cute brunette 8 wrapping up gifts at the book store.....man this was gonna be good, i wasn't expecting to get a number out of it, but I was gonna have fun doing it....I was waiting for the wrapping line to die down to go up to her, but when it did I had my back turned and she got up and left for good, I was like crap!!, ill get her tongiht though , heres what i was going to say:

Walk up to her table with no one around and ask her:

Me: Do you wrap gifts good?

Her: yeh

Me: Are you really good at wrapping gifts?

Her: Yeh! Why?!

Me: How bout you wrap yourself up and I take you home to mom?....(with a sly smile on my face.... Has a little cheese in it but also cute at the same time definatly get a smile and a blush, maybe a number if im really lucky.)

I like it I think its good for a laugh.....maybe not a number though...



Last night was really dead for some reason around town though....very few chicks out (prolly cause of finals) and the ones that were out were UG..LEE!!!

I only got one more approach done that night, I was at Barnes and Nobles and In the two hours I was there I only saw one chick worth approaching and she wasn't that hot, although I did talk to a russian chick who was kinda cute when I was sitting in the cafe checking any chicks that came in; she started talking to me but after overhearing her convo with another guy I didn't even want to talk to her let alone get her number!!!! So I was really standoffish with her....

So it was about 10 mins to closing and I see a *descent* looking girl and I was like ahh what the hell I need another approach for my crew (you know who you are)

From the side she looked like a 6 with cinnamon brunette hair, kinda plain jane, but I needed an approach , so I went past her and said "Excuse me" and she looks at me with this *look* that I couldn't describe in her eyes that just put my completely at ease and made her look like the friendliest thing since Charmin TP. She had a look in her eyes that made her *come across* as the nicest, sweetest, most caring girl I've met.... I couldn't describe it, but that look with simple, but without makeup pretty looks bumped her immediatly to a 7.5.....and to think from the side she looked like nothing special, but when she looked at me straight she had this "down home" beauty to her, like a cute girl who grew up on a horse farm (you all know what I'm talking bout).

Anyways enough rant about my suprise....I walked past her and said

Me: "Excuse Me"

Her: "Sorry about that"
Me: "No problem".....and after I walked past her I did a "after thought" about face move and said "Hey, do you mind if I ask you a question" and she looked at my straight in the face and I was like "whoa" Heart flutters and all sorts of weird crap, I thought I was gonna pass out, man the eyes are a powerful tool guys, I can't tell you enough....

Her: Yeh sure

Me: "Are you single"

Her: "No, sorry".......said very calmly like she had everything under control....

Me: Well, anyways I noticed you when I came in and i wanted to meet you....I'm chris Btw....

Her: I'm Megan.....

Me: It was good meeting you megan you have a good evening...

Her: You too

Well fellas, all I can say is WOW, man her eyes had ahold of me bro like you wouldn't believe, she did something to me that I cannot describe but I wish I could harness that, cause all sorts of weird SH*t happened to me when she looked at me......I need to take notes from her .....



Well fellas 11 approaches made, 89 to go and 36 days left, and you know what I felt last night for the first time in my life!!!, almost no fear, just fun, I was appraoching with comfort and relative ease, but still not gone, but alot more at ease...and alot faster, 20 secs is a record for me to see and approach, but I had nothing but fun last night, guys if anything go out and approach 10 girls and your fears will be mostly gone...you may not believe but believe it in terms of female fear I was just about as bad as they get.... I predict that tonight is going to be even better, and I am going to have an absolute blast talking to women tonight!!!!

10 will set you free guys!!!!!!!! JUST 10!!!!! DO IT!!!!!!! NOW!!!

GET UP FROM YOUR PC RIGHT NOW AND GO TO THE NEAREST BOOKSTORE AND DO YOUR FIRST!!!!! NOW, DO IT NOW!!!!

THE JOURNEY OF 1000 MILES BEGINS WITH A SINGLE STEP...... QUIT SAYING, TOMMOROW, SOMEDAY, WHEN THIS AND THAT GETS STRAIGHTENED OUT, GET OFF YOUR F*CKING A55 AND GO DO YOUR FIRST TONIGHT RIGHT NOW DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pugs

 

[Pugsley_f5]

DO IT NOW ARE YOU STILL JERKING AROUND IN FRONT OF THE PC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????