Pluto's 'Step-by-Step' Progress Journal

[Plutoman]

And, well, got basically broken up with by L.

If you knew her as well as I do, the reason would make more sense.. but essentially it comes down to her prayers not aligning with her wants and desires, and she's following her prayers. Probably gonna sound like bull**** to most people, but it makes sense for her - knowing how she stands with religion and all of that.

Considering I almost blew off M for her, it's a good thing I didn't. Kind of a sucky day, as I was really growing fond of L and enjoyed the time. Rare to find a traditional, respectable girl, with standards, morals, and is also fun and geeky at the same time.

Kind of weird, especially for how much she likes me. Been told all of that, too, that she's conflicted and wants to keep seeing me but thinks it's a bad idea to keep going if it's not right in her prayers as well. She really does like me (it's just.. obvious) - I'm fairly sure I could have convinced her to keep dating me - so it's odd to be broken up with when she still cares.

I'll probably let it sit, and depending on my own position.. give her a ring in several weeks.

 

[sageproduct]

Ahhh sorry man

You and L were banging right? I was going to pm you actually to see how it was going with her. Rock on

 

[Plutoman]

Nope, not with her standards. Stopped short of actual sex. Which is cool with me, I'm not desperate for it, and the important part to me is the connection and the desire (she definitely desired it, if she hadn't I wouldn't have bothered; but I can respect desiring it but restraining).

Not gonna write it off... but for the moment it's done. I guess I'll see where it goes, she's the kind of girl I really want to date long-term but I know better than to get stuck and set my sights on just one girl.

 

[Plutoman]

Going to be interesting - my gut says I'm going to hear from L in... 5 days.

I was getting her this -> http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/ef2d/
.. as her '3 month' gift basically. No, this isn't a rant about gifts/anything, regardless of the whole separation, she was fun and I don't mind getting it for her. She earned it anyways in my book. Call me weird for getting a gift, but little pointless gifts of romance are fun. It's because I want to, not for anything I'll get out of it.

She's going to get it, and she's going to laugh, maybe cry.. depending on how much she misses me then. I know she didn't 'want' to break up with me, that was apparent enough.

And the backstory for that - we're both star trek geeks, and she got this -> http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/dea2/?srp=1 and we made homemade pizza with it. She didn't have an oven mitt, though.

Which, you know, maybe I won't hear from her, but my gut says I will. Until then, no contact it is.

 

[sageproduct]

Wait so you guys were in a relationship or you weren't? Or you were spinning plates and she was only going out with you? Just seems weird to use the term "break up"

Which star trek series?

 

[Plutoman]

It was semi casual relationship, as it would be. Technically casual, but she wasn't dating anyone else, we were with each other 3 times a week, etc etc. I use the term break up fairly loosely here, more technically we just stopped dating as it would be. But it was reasonably suitable, so it fits.

She doesn't believe in sex outside of marriage, though. So as far as that goes, no actual banning was involved.

Next generation! Definitely. Though those things are for the original series.

 

[Plutoman]

Party up ****ers.

 

[Plutoman]

Man, I was drunk when I posted that.

I'm seriously losing motivation. Not because I can't, just because it's annoying as ****. I've approached so many girls that I'm really just not in the mood for it anymore. If I end up single, so be it (though I've got options right now, I'm not really getting out there to maintain options).

Maybe it's a remnant of just being bummed out from wednesday's loss, she was a fun girl. I'm still cheerful, etc, it's not affecting my life (in fact, given me more time to keep up with work/school/etc), but it was a bummer. Maybe I just need a few weeks of break. Still got M to deal with, though she's been weird. She's holding too much frame right now, so I need to back off.

Just generally lost that drive. Drove too hard for the past while, and it's burnt me out. Too many girls, too many *****es, I generally know how an approach is going to go before the 30 second mark. Sometimes before I approach. I know whether I'll get a number, whether I'll be blown out, and 2/3rds of the time I can call what interaction I'll get after the number.

Anyways: rant done, I'm gonna chill with M for now, see what happens with L, and see if my drive returns in the next couple weeks.

 

[Plutoman]

And it's off with M.

No girls left now.

Guess I'm gonna have to get out and sarge someplace up. To hell with lack of motivation, I'll make myself get some. Somehow or another. Numbers game, ****ers.

 

[sageproduct]

And it's off with M.

No girls left now.

Guess I'm gonna have to get out and sarge someplace up. To hell with lack of motivation, I'll make myself get some. Somehow or another. Numbers game, ****ers.

Was gonna ask what happened. Just peeped into the chat room, saw the log from you and filth this morning. Oh well. Backbreaker said women are an ambition killer...seems true for me so far

 

[Plutoman]

So, Nite and I met a new guy at starbucks, another red pill dude. Older, but another guy to sarge with and get out. So that makes 5 definitive red pill'ers in my area here.

And on another note, re-opened some conversation with L, asked her about going on a hike this saturday (going to be warm).

Got lots of enthusiastic thanks for the gift I had sent her.. she asked if I wanted her to return it, and said she feels like a jerk for not checking her mail earlier and seeing it (she said she just found it this morning). She said she feels guilty keeping it. I told her I don't give gifts expecting anything; so keep it, of course, it was simply a gift to her.

Relating to the hike, I got this.. "I would love to see you and had the same thought about wanting to hike with you actually but don't you think it would just be confusing and difficult? I'm surprised you are tempting me, you know I am not good at enforcing my own decisions haha."

After a couple back and forth texts, I also got this; "I don't trust my initial inclination so let me think about it tonight and get back to you. I hope you are doing well!!"

So as I see it, there's more confirmation that she wants to go out with me still, but is hesitant from the earlier reasons.

Any tips on alleviating the religious concerns? Her lack of 'definitive' response from prayers? It's a weird situation, as she's just hardcore enough into it that I think she's an outlier... not the normal "if she likes you enough, it wouldn't matter". I'd have thought that a month, month and a half ago, but at this point where I've seen how deep her personal faith runs, I'm not so sure. My gut says otherwise.

 

[Plutoman]

Some talks, convinced her to go out with me tomorrow. Her comments..

"I want to see you but I still think I would be smarter not to. I am not even doing anything this whole weekend and it is beautiful out so I would especially love to see you and enjoy the gorgeous free weekend God gave me but I just know I will get sucked back in and get hurt. I'm being strong!"

Called her out on the hurt part... bit of beta reassurance essentially, telling her that I'm not the same guys she's dated before and that I'm not going to hurt her. Her reply?

"I'm not scared of getting hurt so much as I'm scared of making the wrong decision."

I told her simply to trust me on it. Bit wordier, but meh to typing it here. She says;

"Okay. We can meet tomorrow and see how it goes. See if your confidence rubs off on me. It might end up the same though. I have to listen to God first and you second. I'm just not clear on what He is saying right now but maybe tomorrow when I see you I will know better. Does that seem fair?"

Said yes and we transitioned into logistical arrangements. She wanted to meet me instead of me picking her up - agreed to it here.

Any opinions? Tips?

 

[BeDJ]

Plutoman attempts to unbutton her pants.
L: God is telling me no.

Plutoman shows NN's thread.
Plutoman: Don't worry, I'm involuntarily celibate, I just want to see if the carpet matches the drapes.

They have sex and Plutoman is eliminated from the challenge.

 

[Plutoman]

Hah!

I chuckled, definitely. That can adequately describe the situation. Almost her words, too.

 

[Plutoman]

Had a good hike, lots of fun, went a good 10-12 miles or so with her. She kept up well. Had fun, was entertaining a few times when I just grabbed her, picked her up, and carried her through a trail. She'd squeal, freak out a bit, but obviously had some fun. Or, with a fence, just grabbing her and dropping her on the other side before she could say anything. And of course, lots of good conversation.

Anyways, end discussion: she still just wants to be around me, I was telling her about my last weekend and her comment was ".. I just sat around with Cindy [her best friend] and drank. I've been pretty sad over this lately." She verbalized a few times how she wishes she felt otherwise because she really enjoys being around me, she was pretty sad over it, and had the thoughts a week ago that it'd be so nice to get out this weekend with me.

... But she still feels some unease, thinks it's from faith, but isn't 100% sure, and essentially, she asked me to see where I feel after a while, and if I still want to continue dating her after such a while, then to get in touch and she'll hope to hear from me. She was pretty emotional over it. I got a pretty solid make-out, too, left it at that though. So to put it in her perspective, she's concerned over how serious I'd be in the relationship. There's her sense of unease. She can put all kinds of labels over it, but I'd definitely say her sense of unease is from a lack of certainty to whether it'd be a good, right long-term decision for her.

And to jump into my perspective... I'll take a few months, see what comes my way, see if I still am into her in a few months (good test for me, I guess, eh?), and if I am, I'll get in touch (the chances of her finding someone cooler than I? unlikely. yeah, I'm confident about that. And she's not the type to sleep around.), and if I'm not, this little bit of time will be good for me.

 

[Plutoman]

Still touching base with L occasionally, got a date tomorrow with another girl, and got a girl chasin' me all over the damn place in my class. The latter girl apparently has a boyfriend she lives with, not sure I want to bother with that level of crazy. She's already done crazy **** to get my attention, gets worse the more I ignore her.

So, heh. Options, again. Weird, though, guess I'm in a bit of oneitis, I don't feel the same way I did with my ex-girlfriend, but I definitely think L has been the coolest of the bunch. I throw a lot of the negative **** out here on how our relationship went, but we had some (not just some, it's been 95%) awesome fun times together, she's fun to talk to, fun to hang with, fun in bed, etc.

 

[Plutoman]

Had a date, girl was fun, made out, if I had my own place we could've banged but I didn't get enough escalation for her to not care about her parents being within earshot, or to get her in the car.

Oh well. Next time.

Got a number right now which I don't know if I should call... I think she may be bat**** insane, so I'm hesitating.

 

[Plutoman]

Hehe, another M-like situation. Pink = her, dubbed C, girl I was out with thursday. Hit her up day after because I like to plan ahead a bit w/ homework and other people.

Friday.
10:39am - "So what's your schedule look like?"
11:21am "I'm pretty busy this weekend and I don't know what my week looks like yet"
11:42am "Hmm alright"

Satuday.
6:32pm "[name], I am currently involved with someone else we aren't serious, but it's getting really confusing and I need to focus on that. I'm so sorry. I did have a really good time with you."
6:41pm "Cool, no problem."

I'm working on texting less. Big thing for this girl was very little texting. Anyways, next.

 

[sosavvy56]

Hahaha. I like your attitude.

 

[Plutoman]

Picked up a number earlier at the starbucks... was a bit too easy, was NOT in the mood for a chat but I opened a girl without really thinking. She turned out more interested than I expected and stuck around trying to continue talking to me for a while even when she was planning on leaving. 'nother bible chick.

Went out downtown and learned a few lessons... had a dramatically improved session where I got some good rapport with a girl, had her wanting to hang with me and my buddy, we bounced around to diff places, etc etc. Usually I'm in and out, or I'm in, girl wants to bang, we leave. I rarely get a good connection.

However, on that note, the girl turned out to be a bit of a self-entitled *****, so... that died off in the end and now I'm home alone for the night.

Ah well. More girls abound.

The annoying thing is that a lot of it is reminding me of -why- I like L so much. Guess that's not annoying though, it just means I may get down to a serious relationship with her, since she's just way cooler, less *****y, less of a self-entitled prick, than the girls I'm out meeting. Feel like fate's trying to tell me something... but who knows?

@sosavvy56; thanks, appreciated.