as a guy that has gone a year with no fapping on a few occassions one piece of advice I will state here is dont get hung up on the number of days you are clean. thats really irrelevant to pretty much everything.
Dan08 said:
Day 1 for me starting now. HERE GOES
Also came across examples of benefits dude have been having. A loooong read but worth it if you need the motivation and feel yourself flagging.
http://www.reuniting.info/download/pdf/0.BENEFITS.pdf
I read a few pages of that and it is interesting and good encouragement so i appreciate that post....however it should be noted at least in the first few pages its filled with people that have gone no fap from a few days to 2-3 months....to be clear that hasnt overcome any problem at all.
bear this in mind....
abstinence is not proof of overcoming any addiction because you can be locked into a straight jacket and be abstinent and the second you are free you will dive right back into the addiction.
I really would caution against getting hung up on the number of days you are sober....rather focus on the changing of the mindset and thought patterns so every attractive girl you see you dont instantly fantasize about her starring a porno with you. work on healthier habits.
with porn addiction there are really 3 keys
1. changing your thought patterns
2. not entertaining the first wave of temptation....in other words porn cravings come in waves...the first is the lightest and once its broken you are done for. i cant remember now because its been so long but there are 5 waves and its like going down a tunnel the deeper you go the worse you are so the key is to not get into the tunnel aka dont break the first wave....the second you start getting that temptation deal with that temptation
3. and the reason i failed....and am where I am...maintenance. it really never goes away. you have to maintain you efforts. keep your life in order. dont let yourself get in states of full blown depression. manage your stress. manage your life better.
again days sober is not the key....changing your thought patterns and lifestyle if the key because I can handcuff you and youll be sober for life but youll still be addicted. also bear in mind the first month of sobriety is amongst the worst. the second and most of the third month isnt too bad....then in the end of the third and through the fourth month youll really get a big kick in the pants.
this kick in the pants will be due primarily because the body has to ejaculate and blue balls do in fact hurt. wet dreams which youve been having up to this point havent been all the bad but now that you are sober and your mind is accepting it....when you have semen build up youll really want to release and so this time period will be quite difficult.
after that 4th month or so i say the primary key is point number three....to maintain all your hard work and that is best done by not entertaining the temptation and to stop it at wave 1. your need to ejaculate will be hard to withstand as will managing your life properly so you dont break down again and during times of blue balls maintain your thought patterns so they spiral off into porno land will be hard but key.
Ive seen plenty of folks including myself go sober for a year and crash and burn because they failed to maintain doing the things that got them sober in the first place and its especially tricky because we need to be careful not to kill our sex drives either and
its fine line to walk when you see a hot girl in acknowledging that hotness and not fantasizing about her in a porno...a very line to walk indeed.
i apologize for sounding like a lecture but Ive been there and now Im back so I can tell you all about getting free from porn and fapping like a mad man and falling back into it.
