Well, not to put too fine a point on it after VULPINE's, well,..shall we say 'raw', but effective assessment, you're clearly dealing with a "career mommie", meaning she's made a career from being a mommie. So lets continue to strip away the fluff of the situation here and get down to the meat shall we? At 29 years old and with an 8 y.o. daughter this means she started her illustrious 'career' by getting pregnant at 20 and then again at 25. She has essentially missed her prime years of experiencing or doing much of anything with her life other than having children and drawing an income from them. Understand that to a 'career mommie', children are little more than insurance policies, and up to this point she's had two husbands(?) in 9 years sign up for those policies.
ROBLB, I'm going to ask not to look at her as a person now. This is going to be hard, I know, but try to see her as a series of conditions and circumstances that are leading her to be exactly what you'd like her to be. You are the next insurance policy. I'm sure the sex is mind-blowing, it has to be - at 29 she's seeing the end of the party and needs to cash her chips in now that she's begining to realize her decline in sexual marketability. She needs to be a sexual acrobat in order for her bait & switch to lure you into signing on as her insurance policy.
If you have known her ex for 10 years she undoubtedly knows your value as a commodity in providing her (and her 2 kids from different fathers) with the long term security she is after at this stage of her life. Understand, she is only doing what her conditions are requiring of her and using your emotional attachment to lock you into being her provider. By agreeing to this you are voluntarily consenting to become her cuckold. She has cheated on you (and your misguided emotional attachment) already by having had children with prior men and expecting you to be forgiving of it while rearing these other men's children (all while she draws a paycheck from the fathers). She's bred with the bad boys and now, at 29, needs a nice guy chump to help raise them. Of course she's crazy about you, you own your own business and daddy #2 still works at Tower Records!
If you marry her, she gets away with it. Do you want your daughter, who up to now has remained an innocent in all this, to have this woman's influence on her in the long term? What would you say if she were to tell your daughter at 18, "don't worry about college honey, just get knocked up and the cash will come in"? Because directly or indirectly, that's what she'll learn both by her actions and your own compliance with them - all while you foot the bill emotionally, financially and time-wise raising her mistakes for other men who should've known better.
And as if this weren't enough, do you ever think she'll appreciate the gravity of her own action and the sacrifice she's not asking you to make, but EXPECTING you to make in agreeing to share her self-inflicted burden? Perhaps this is the question you ought to ask yourself the next time you see her spooning with her ex (whichever one) who'd just as soon kick your ass for distrubing them while you'd raise his child.
STAND THE FUKK UP ROB! NEXTING THIS B!TCH WILL BE THE LEAST OF YOUR PROBLEMS.
