My Amazing LTR GF has a "Bad Past"

[KontrollerX]

I wish you all the best in snapping out of the rut Rudy.

It sounds like you've found yourself a real winner despite her past.

Don't drive her away.

Do whatever you can to prevent that.

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Yea we've taken a few days off to let me cool down. She's patiently waiting by the phone until I call. She keeps checkin up a fair bit to see how I'm feeling. I've got a few platonic female friends coming from the US who wants to drop by and visit, that would make her mad though.

 

[Holland]

We've been fighting over n over again. I feel like I am on a witch-hunt to find faults on her. I know she can only take so much crap before she decides to leave altogether.

Damn, man. WHY are you making such a big deal out of all this. This is totally unneccesary.
It is only a matter of time untill she drops your immature arse if you keep this shiit up.
IT WAS NOT A MISTAKE IN HER PAST!
It's a mistake for you to judge her like this. It's ok to have threesomes, as long as you don't (emotionally/physicly/intellectually) hurt anyone involved. (Don't listen to LMS on this subject! I respect his beliefs, but I believe they are unhealthy. There is nothing wrong with three (or more) mature human beings enjoying sexual pleasure together in the context of respect)
As soon as she realises this you are HISTORY. She will find a mature lover and you will be left with your BS.
You need to calm down and fix your sex issues, right fuccking NOW.

BUT she's remaining strong with me and really wants to be with me. No girl before has ever stayed on with me after this crap treatment from me. She's left previous boyfriends for even less

She is not remaining strong. She knows that what you're doing is wrong, but because she still is attracted to you and is hoping for change in your attitude she's staying. If you keep this up she will eventually leave or gradually turn into a LSE woman (which is even worse than her leaving you).

Man I really feel like Captain Save-a-Ho lately.

Stop insulting yourself

 

[dietzcoi]

Rudi

Just ask yourself if you would be comfortable having her previous "encounters" standing in the front of the chapel at your wedding...

Ask yourself if you would like men to smirk and giggle whenever you walk down the street with her...

Her past DOES matter, the guys who think it doesn't are the guys who would only want sex from her, not an LTR, which it appears you want.

Obviously this bothers you. It bothers you for a reason. People's past actions DO count for something.

If a murderer stopped murdering today, would you just let them walk free?

I Know, I know, her sexual past is not murder, I am just making a point.

I do not know if she is a good woman who made mistakes, or a bad person at heart. She was an idiot to tell you about her sexual past. She must have been taking advice from OPRAH or some moronic womens' magazine which tells women to be honest in all things... foolish!!

There was no good reason to tell you about all this and now she has ruined your relationship. The cat is out of the bag and won't go back in. This will not have a good ending. Prepare yourself for it...

No amount of rationalizing will make you forget this... time to move on, as painful as it will be...

Man, these woman's magazines which tell women it is OK to be a slvt are really hurting a lot of people. Sorry, Penkitten... but it DOES matter.

Dietzcoi

 

[Holland]

Man, these woman's magazines which tell women it is OK to be a slvt are really hurting a lot of people. Sorry, Penkitten... but it DOES matter.

No, your neurotic attitude is hurting people.

Murdering people is something destructive and unhealthy. Sex (including threesomes) is something that is constructive and healthy.
If it's not it's called sexual assault/rape/whatever. This was not the case in Rudy's situation.

Stop reinforcing this man's sex issues. It's the last thing he needs right now

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

I know she had a bad past, or made a mistake by telling me, thanks for the help but as Holland was saying, the last thing I need is to reinforce my issues with it.

No one knows about it here, she has started a new life and I am the only who knows about it (unfortunately, but better than anyone else knowing). Back home only the participants and her sister knows and I am not planning on marrying this girl. I am 23 for god's sakes. I just wanted a way out of dealing with something that doesn't involve me in the first place. And no amount of wrongdoing on my behalf can make me or her feel any better.

She is not one of those slvts that do entire basketball teams and feel proud of it. She does not sneak around and do shady things. She is a just a quiet homebody girl who is kinkier than your average girl.

 

[Adrian]

I know she had a bad past, or made a mistake by telling me, thanks for the help but as Holland was saying, the last thing I need is to reinforce my issues with it.

No one knows about it here, she has started a new life and I am the only who knows about it (unfortunately, but better than anyone else knowing). Back home only the participants and her sister knows and I am not planning on marrying this girl. I am 23 for god's sakes. I just wanted a way out of dealing with something that doesn't involve me in the first place. And no amount of wrongdoing on my behalf can make me or her feel any better.

She is not one of those slvts that do entire basketball teams and feel proud of it. She does not sneak around and do shady things. She is a just a quiet homebody girl who is kinkier than your average girl.

If you're able to live with the fact that she screwed up then awesome. Stay with her and there is really no need to blow the situation out of proportion. If it still continues to bother you which I hope it won't then you're going to have to end it. One thing I can be sure of is that her slvtty image will always be there. In fact whenever a girl tells me how many partners she's had I never believe them. I always assume it's more but then again I really don't care either way. I wouldn't let it haunt me if I were you. And as far as your last sentence is concerned just remember (not to sound overly pessimistic or anything).... It's always the quiet ones you must watch out for and the average girl is a slvt.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Damn, this almost sounds like my b!tch. But, not as bad haha. Neways, just judge her on her actions. If sh!t starts going down hill i'd next her a$$. protect your heart and don't get too close to dis ho'. But, if you are BOTH happy and she is always true to you, open with you and doesn't keep any secrects. Keep her until she does fvck up or you get bored.

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Dude...she is basically living with me unless shes got to do study for exams....apart from uni and me, she doesnt even want to spend time with anything else.

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Anyways..I jsut want to concentrate on things now..But I need practical Ideas or solutions to get over and forget about all this sh*t.

I dont know I could get something just as crazy to get even but that wouldn't be the safest way and karma will just bite back. Please help, I need to put this to rest.

 

[Jerry Maguire]

If you're suffering some bad mental images of her with other guys, you can use NLP to help you become unaffected by them.
I think this would help you.

 

[Holland]

Read some of David Shades material on sexuality. That should fix your sex issues.
You don't want to repress what she told you, you want to accept it and move on so you can work on your relationship and make it grow and flourish again.

Good starters material is 'Give women wild screaming orgasms' aka Foundations and 'Secrets of female sexuality'.

http://www.masterful-lover.com/


The 'Sex revolution handbook' by Daniel Rose is also an excellent source for sexual beliefs.

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Thank you very much guys.

There is a lot of double standards in society though. I can't say I don't have any. Guys can indulge in a lot of sexual stuff and be seen as gods while if girls do the same they are outcasts and only as good as pieces of meat. My best friend was involved in many crazy escapades, ranging from big gangbangs runnin trains on girls to f*cking a girl in front of 3 football teams. But when I asked him if he found out his gf did 2 guys he said he would cut sick. Another friend has less than 100 girls under his belt, did 4 girls in one night told me he got a lil bothered when he found out his oneitis had kiss other girls and kissed her teacher a few years ago and couldnt see her in the same light after she told him. So its obviously not just me who gets a little bothered by a girl's sexual past.

Maybe its because I was raised in a family with their first partners being the one and only partner for life. I was raised to see a perfect girl and to have feelings for one as if she is actually perfect, I think it is time to reprogram myself.

I don't want to repress the whole business about her history, because it is going to resurface like lately and I don't want to get down about it. I want to accept it and live life the way my own actions affect it, not somebody elses.

Anyway where can I get some resource on how to get over this stuff?

 

[Adrian]

Thank you very much guys.

There is a lot of double standards in society though. I can't say I don't have any. Guys can indulge in a lot of sexual stuff and be seen as gods while if girls do the same they are outcasts and only as good as pieces of meat. My best friend was involved in many crazy escapades, ranging from big gangbangs runnin trains on girls to f*cking a girl in front of 3 football teams. But when I asked him if he found out his gf did 2 guys he said he would cut sick. Another friend has less than 100 girls under his belt, did 4 girls in one night told me he got a lil bothered when he found out his oneitis had kiss other girls and kissed her teacher a few years ago and couldnt see her in the same light after she told him. So its obviously not just me who gets a little bothered by a girl's sexual past.

Maybe its because I was raised in a family with their first partners being the one and only partner for life. I was raised to see a perfect girl and to have feelings for one as if she is actually perfect, I think it is time to reprogram myself.

I don't want to repress the whole business about her history, because it is going to resurface like lately and I don't want to get down about it. I want to accept it and live life the way my own actions affect it, not somebody elses.

Anyway where can I get some resource on how to get over this stuff?

I'm glad you finally made your decision and making an effort to accept all this nonsense about your gf's past. There is nothing you can do to forget about this however it will take time for you to adjust to the point to which her past wouldn't bother you (at least not as much) anymore. I'm pretty certain that it's going to take some time but it will happen. Maybe the advice from some of the posters above me might work. I never really read in to that stuff.

And as a side note... Don't allow yourself to be misguided by todays deluded society. In this case there IS NO double standard except for the ones directed at us! As crazy as that might sound just take it from me. There's nothing wrong with reprogramming yourself however that doesn't mean that you should become like the real hypocrites who deny nature for what it really is. There are so many fallacies and so many contradictions in this feminazi ideology. Think for yourself man! Society is full of sh!t in matters like these. Hope that HELPED

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

I admit that human nature can be the primal motive that makes people do anything these days. I know that there is both positive and negative but I generally look for the positives. But I have to take into account society to which it help humans to become more "civilised and controlled" otherwise we would still be shaggin like monkeys and walk around naked.

 

[Last Man Standing]

There is no such thing as "double standard" - our standard is based on our nature - which is different amongst the sexes!

Getting Hypnotized is the only way you'll forget this - by asking for advice on how to forget this, tells you that what she did is wrong!!

Do some soul-searching on what you value in a woman and determine if she meets your criteria. If being freaky is not important to you then so it is!!

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Hey man I bet you if she knew about my past she would have trouble sleeping everynight.

When I mentioned double standard I meant that us, MEN, tend to do things that we wouldnt expect women to do and if they do, they get chastised all the time. One of my friends is the biggest manwh*re but if he found out his girl had a "bad" history he said he would (jokingly) kill her.

I've met some girls who are good but not freaky enough for me and I end up leaving them or spin other plates to fill up the void. People usually get hurt REAL bad and I get a bad name for myself. My gf now seems to fill the void but there was a price I wasn't willing to pay but getting there.

Other girls close to being as freaky as her usually spin plates on me and have a way higher number of partners. Not to mention their lack of commitment, honesty, integrity and respect while they are with you. They would have a bad family background, image problem or use sex as validation. I've been with many back in the day.

Other girls close to being as nice, nurturing and loyal as her are usually boring, too friendszone for me and have no spontanaiety. They would be aloof to a person like me and want a nice boy that they could reward sex to five years later. I've been with girls like these and sadly, had to get my fix from somebody else while I was still flying solo.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Hey man I bet you if she knew about my past she would have trouble sleeping everynight.

Read my last post!!

You deserve each other!!

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Well I bet you that for every girls boyfriend there is a "unique" past, if you let that out then most girls would dump their boyfriends.

How about you LMS, do you have a squeaky clean past?

 

[Johnny Soporno]

Well I bet you that for every girls boyfriend there is a "unique" past, if you let that out then most girls would dump their boyfriends.

Me, I think you're a true 'tard for EVEN WORRYING FOR ONE SECOND about your girlie's past. The way you described her, right from the beginning, she sounds like a true keeper!

Go download the SECOND part of the 'Intro to Seductive Reasoning' seminar video - it's free, and it will help you solve ALL your screwed-up, disrespectful and misogynistic issues with regards to your sweetie. You need some major MAJOR reframing, 'cuz you've bought into some crazy BS!

Actually, watch it immediately by yourself, THEN watch it again with your girl, and DAMN will she be thrilled and impressed with you afterwards!

Johnny Soporno
Lifestyle Guru

P.S.