Most chaotic, confusing, intense and "hot and cold" dating relationship I've ever had

[Korrupt]

Texted her earlier today about going out tomorrow and got no response. Got pissed and decided to google her name.

Found her Facebook page. Found her two previous husbands. Found her four kids.

She has three different names, one maiden and two from marriages. Two kids look my age, and two look around 10-14 years old. One husband was pictured with her and her four kids (must be the one that died - second husband). The other (first) husband (first because he has the same name as the older kids) has a Facebook page, which I found by looking on her sons page. Searched the second husbands name on google and it says he has a death record, not going to pay to look at it though. He also has a bankruptcy record.. It's very possible she doesn't want me, or anyone going to her place because her younger kids live and travel with her. There was also a post (from a few months ago) on her wall from one of her older sons saying he wanted to come visit her. Weekend visit from the family, possibly? Still can't be sure about anything, though.

EDIT: Neither of the husbands are dead. I saw more pics and the one that I thought was dead has a pic up from less than two months ago on HER Facebook page. Could she be divorced and the family live in a different state? Yes. But I'm done giving her the benefit of the doubt.. This is beyond fishy... Her stories are looking like bullsh!t and it seems like she's married. This is f*cking sickening..

 

[sexysuave]

Ok, so you're 21, how old is this twice married, four kids, chick you have a oneitis for and didn't even hit yet?

 

[AlexDP]

This girl has emotional issues, but she's NOT a master manipulator as everyone might have you believe. The issues of borderlines usually only arise after a couple of months and when there is some true intimacy involved. Here that is not the case. Furthermore it's only been a few dates and you're already asking questions about her on a forum, because something doesn't feel right. She's not fooling you and that's good. Now leave.

 

[Korrupt]

Texted her earlier today about going out tomorrow and got no response. Got pissed and decided to google her name.

Found her Facebook page. Found her two previous husbands. Found her four kids.

She has three different names, one maiden and two from marriages. Two kids look my age, and two look around 10-14 years old. One husband was pictured with her and her four kids (must be the one that died - second husband). The other (first) husband (first because he has the same name as the older kids) has a Facebook page, which I found by looking on her sons page. Searched the second husbands name on google and it says he has a death record, not going to pay to look at it though. He also has a bankruptcy record.. It's very possible she doesn't want me, or anyone going to her place because her younger kids live and travel with her. There was also a post (from a few months ago) on her wall from one of her older sons saying he wanted to come visit her. Weekend visit from the family, possibly? Still can't be sure about anything, though.

EDIT: Neither of the husbands are dead. I saw more pics and the one that I thought was dead has a pic up from less than two months ago on HER Facebook page. Could she be divorced and the family live in a different state? Yes. But I'm done giving her the benefit of the doubt.. This is beyond fishy... Her stories are looking like bullsh!t and it seems like she's married. This is f*cking sickening..

EDIT (again):

Mandatory separation prior to divorce. Don't ask how I found out.

The story of a husband dying was definitely a lie. The story of her breaking up with a younger man in November and their relationship not being just about sex.. No idea. Possibly just a way to put sex off with me. Not taking anyone back to her place? Most likely just another way to put off sex.

 

[sexysuave]

How old is this broad?

 

[Korrupt]

How old is this broad?

40.

 

[sexysuave]

- So you're 21, and she is 40.

- Has 2 ex husbands (and might be lying about one of them)

- Has like 4 kids or so, probably some your age.

- She is obviouisly lying to you about a bunch of sh*t

- She could possibly be BPD (and you're not even having sex with her)

- She is not even putting out, but is taking you on an emotional rollercoaster

- She is not even putting out, yet you're placing such importance on her.

And you have a oneitis for THIS girl???????? Re-read all of that... I mean, you're 21 for God's sake!!! Do you think you're gonna be happiily ever after with THIS whvore?? Dude, wake up and smell the coffee!!

You should treat this as a pump and dump, and you clearly should not develop a oneitis for a pump and dump, and especially a pump and dump who is CRAZY, NOT EVEN GIVING YOU ANY, LYING ABOUT EVERYTHING, FLAKING OR UNAVAILABLE and 20 YEARS YOUR SENIOR!!!

I just don't get it. Don't get me wrong, I've had my fair share of MILFs lol, but not actually falling for them bro, and not even getting it lol. Common man, wake up, drop her of the pedestal and you'll end up fvcking her, but start seeing other girls STAT

 

[joverby]

- So you're 21, and she is 40.

- Has 2 ex husbands (and might be lying about one of them)

- Has like 4 kids or so, probably some your age.

- She is obviouisly lying to you about a bunch of sh*t

- She could possibly be BPD (and you're not even having sex with her)

- She is not even putting out, but is taking you on an emotional rollercoaster

- She is not even putting out, yet you're placing such importance on her.

And you have a oneitis for THIS girl???????? Re-read all of that... I mean, you're 21 for God's sake!!! Do you think you're gonna be happiily ever after with THIS whvore?? Dude, wake up and smell the coffee!!

You should treat this as a pump and dump, and you clearly should not develop a oneitis for a pump and dump, and especially a pump and dump who is CRAZY, NOT EVEN GIVING YOU ANY, LYING ABOUT EVERYTHING, FLAKING OR UNAVAILABLE and 20 YEARS YOUR SENIOR!!!

I just don't get it. Don't get me wrong, I've had my fair share of MILFs lol, but not actually falling for them bro, and not even getting it lol. Common man, wake up, drop her of the pedestal and you'll end up fvcking her, but start seeing other girls STAT

Read this mans wise words and let it soak in. He speaks the truth. Should be common sense but if you catch a chick lying to you about sh1t don't trust her / develop feelings.

 

[bigneil]

I triple the notion.

 

[Korrupt]

ME: You & me, *area*, and blah blah. Tonight. I'll even be a gentleman and let you pay ..You down?

HER: I suffered a concussion Friday night. As tempting as it is to be your sugar mama, I'm gonna have to pass.

I knew it was over right there. No reciprocation of another day and not wanting to see me before she leaves for a 2-3 week trip. She just doesn't give a f*ck.

I ended up taking it further instead of just ignoring her. I said "well what about *friend*? She want to go out and have a good time tonight?" To which she responded by actually giving me her friends number. Then I pretty much called her out, and ended up telling her all my true feelings AND trying to qualify/prove myself to her. I'm not going to post all of it. It was bad, long, and pathetic. All she really said was that.. She's been completely honest and sweet with me, said that she "had me all wrong" and that I'm "vengeful and unkind," doesn't need an ego boost or attention because she gets hit on all the time, is wary of a guy who doesn't want to work (job), and takes things very slow so she won't get hurt or hurt anyone else (ironic).

I've deleted her number, won't contact her, and never expect to hear from her again.

And yes, you all are totally right.. It makes/made no sense for me to like this woman so damn much, but I can't explain it, there was just a "spark" that I had never felt with any other girl and I got hooked. It hurts. It really f*cking hurts. I don't expect all of you to understand, but I'm sure some of you do. I wish I could just go back in time and stop myself from going out on that first date with her three months ago. Then I'd be happy and not all f*cked up right now.. All this emotional trauma, for nothing...

 

[ohnoes]

Don't regret your decisions Korrupt. We all make mistakes. Forge onward. You learned many important lessons here. Think and meditate on them. Beast of luck

 

[Johnnyventana]

Sexysuave was right on.

Now, Korrupt. All you had to do when she "passed" was say okay, "see ya when ya get back." That's it. Trust me, she's crazy, when she came back she would have missed you like a beeatch. I know this. I have experienced this. Instead, you made a bunch of drama over not seeing her for one night, that's one night. You know, one night. Remember not to do that in the future (with a sane woman). It's a good lesson anyway. (we've all been there btw)

That said, it is still the best idea to run, as you are.

 

[Korrupt]

Sexysuave was right on.

Now, Korrupt. All you had to do when she "passed" was say okay, "see ya when ya get back." That's it. Trust me, she's crazy, when she came back she would have missed you like a beeatch. I know this. I have experienced this. Instead, you made a bunch of drama over not seeing her for one night, that's one night. You know, one night. Remember not to do that in the future (with a sane woman). It's a good lesson anyway. (we've all been there btw)

That said, it is still the best idea to run, as you are.

I wasn't thinking at the time, I was feeling. I felt like she had not only led me on about going out tonight since Thursday, but also ignored me yesterday and completely and coldly rejected me today. I just felt like this woman, a woman who I had grown to really like and who I thought I shared a genuine and deep connection with, just didn't give a f*ck. No reciprocation, no "sorry I feel bad tonight, but when I get back.." And no care about seeing me before she goes away on a half month trip. I guess I was doomed from the start, like everyone figured, and I guess I was just a fool to believe that she actually cared for me.

But you know what's really sad? One part of me not only wants to believe that everything she said WAS true, but also has hope/hopes that she'll contact me in the future..

Going to stop thinking with my head and start thinking with my d!ck (again) for a while I guess..

 

[Johnnyventana]

Korrupt, that is exactly what I experienced. And I finally/mostly learned to just let her be when she's like that -- and to know that a 180 would then follow. It's as-if they freak and think, "He's not being my puppy dog, I better go back into 'pretend to be normal' mode." Of course they don't know why they think this, they just do. It's how they are programmed. So just be nice and say cool, see ya when you return. Because how they feel changes so quickly.

Now of course you didn't do that. But, no worries. Just text, "Hey. I wasn't myself the other night. Let's forget the other night. And I will see you sometime after you return. Enjoy your trip!"

Why will this work? Because they love to be let off the hook and hate conflict. They love conflict while it happens, but later hate it and hate even more addressing it. So, if you must continue, do the above. And don't even expect a text back. But re-connect 5 days after she comes back. All good. Until the next drama by her.

You should run. But if you can't or won't, this will work.

p.s. But make no mistake. She does not care about you. She's cares about her. You are supply to her, attention. She doesn't need the attention right now, thus, she coldly rejects you. Later she'll need it, and she'll be all awesome. For that moment. It is never ending. Just know that. The awesome is super awesome and the not awesome sucks. People always say, detach. But easier said than done.

 

[loveshogun]

All this for a 40 year old double-divorcee with two kids?

I mean, I know a 40 year old I would bang in a heartbeat. But she's smoking hot, has never been married, has no kids, and is a dancer. I even told her that if she was single for her 40th birthday, I'd bang her. Too bad she got married a couple months before that happened.

But all this agonizing and chasing around. Shoot. I wouldn't do that for any woman.

 

[Korrupt]

Okay.. Wtf is going on here... SHE texted ME just 5 minutes ago:

"We've pretty much been in the bar scene, with the exception of *area*, and I think that creates a feeling of unreality. It's difficult or impossible to cultivate any kind of real relationship in that arena. No, I don't bring anyone back to my house or sleep around. Yes, it's very frustrating for both of us to be physical and not.. Finish. I'm not sure what to do about that except back off the physical thing a bit with you. I am attracted to you so obviously I want to kiss and touch you. The harsh words you said to me really affected me.. Surprised me... I'm wondering who the real Korrupt is."

 

[Die Hard]

Don't be a moron, don't listen to her. I was right about the dead husband story, wasn't I? So listen to me: she's giving you hope, something to hold unto, like admitting that she's attracted to you and saying you hurt her (which tells you she has feelings for you).

These things will make you think there's still a chance for you. It'll make you think, that with the right effort, you can still make things work with her.

Don't fall for this! Me and others on here have experience beyond yours and you just have to trust us when we tell you that things will only get worse if you continue contact with her.

There is nothing to gain from this situation but PAIN, please trust me on this. Fight your feelings, fight your desire for her, you must be strong...

Break contact and do not respond to her calls, texts, emails etc.

 

[sexysuave]

What Die Hard said!! :box:

 

[Korrupt]

You're right. This b!tch is totally nuts. (Before you posted) I responded by saying that I wasn't myself yesterday AND laid my feelings out, once again (like an idiot), and she responds by quoting some kind of cartoon comedy show.

‎"I should tell you that I filled our bags with orphan meat."
"What??"
"Well, I'm making a meat dragon and not just any meat will do."

Seriously.. The f*ck?

 

[vatoloco]

"Run, Forrest! RUN!!!"