Life's a B1tch

[Vending Machine Veteran]

You are a divorced father, are you not? Judging from what you said about your ex, she is not exactly a "quality woman".

The problem is that there isn't necessarily a bright line test separating "high quality" women from "low quality" ones. It's not like the difference between an ugly woman and an attractive woman, which is obvious to see. A seemingly "high quality" woman is capable of "low quality" acts under the right circumstances, just like fresh fruit came become spoiled. In other words, getting yourself a "high quality" woman is hardly a guarantee of anything.

Golden. This guy gets it and should be respected

I really need to read what I missed the past week

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

I'm trying to be empathetic, especially given the erratic posts and bravado persona. I’m truly sorry for your loss after such a brief time. I can only imagine how challenging it must be, and the strain from unsuccessful pregnancies can certainly affect a relationship.

To navigate this difficult time, it's important to find a balance between your emotions and rational thinking. I suggest to take a step back, both physically and emotionally from all of this stress in order to gain a clearer and more neutral perspective on the situation. You need to question her motivations and outcomes while remaining open to new ideas. This way you will not only take her behaviour at face value but also avoid doing something irrational that will cause more harm than good; stay away from the red pill group bias this moment and think about your long term goals and how to action them. The longer you resist reacting, the more time you have to reflect in all of this. Self-assess everything with time.

I can tell you from experience that she may want to fight through tooth and nail to keep you around and keep the relationship going. She may create drama, involve your family, do nice things for you, or rationalize how insignificant her actions were. All I can say is that you have all the leverage in the relationship to end it if you do not want to continue this journey with her. Most people don’t get this chance.

Good luck.

Great post

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

A woman who considers her man her best option and who respects her man, will not respond to text with sexual things. You're not her best option, otherwise she would have policed herself to not do something to lose you.

You say you're a veteran implying you have experience (an elephant doesn't say how big he is, he jist walks), but you got with a woman cause "you're old and wants kids" women are the ones who say that $hit, men plan ahead and don't need anything from women.

You mentioned you're "short and bald" implying you probably have a hard time getting an woman, therefore are afraid of losing her, if me only reading this, it reeks of insecurity and desperation, imagine what that woman thinks about you, a woman who you spend a lot of time with and have a sixth sense for desperate men.

You're a veteran in years, but you're still a noob in the dating game. You gotta a lot work to do my friend.

Good post

I stopped believing in women a long time ago. Nothing they do surprises me anymore.

For the longest time, even after swallowing the red pill, women's true nature would bother me..

It hasn't bothered me in years, bud. Took me 15 years or so, but I know I truly don't care

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

Oke in that case men should also lower their expectations . The outcome, or I'd say ,the final "product" from your description will be "the azzhole". You know, the type of man who doesn't care if she does whatever because he never trusted her to begin with.

I can tell you that then all of a sudden women will do ANYTHING to get some emotions put of you.

There's no excuse for such behavior when you have a covenant with a woman. I get what you're tryung to do, but simultaneously, despite all your good efforts your advice might be more harmful than you want. We're not talking Texting but Sexting my friend. That's a few levels beyond normal contact as the other dude basically already had her mind....

Regain focus? I agree with that part tho.

Good post

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

Every man that lacks self love and self respect will eventually find himself I'm this exact situation.

Because women are like that wild animal you try to tame: no amount of study will predict how she'll react tomorrow. And eventually the wild animal will hurt you. When it does, you only got yourself to blame.

Beyond self respect is an entire world of goodness waiting for ya. You just gotta get through the bitter pill called loneliness. Once you get through that, much better thing waiting for you. But first you gotta tell life how to treat you. You say that it's okay to be disrespectful towards you. You'll reap what you sow.


Dude loves her more than he loves himself.

Imagine him living om her house...he would've been kicked out like 5 times already for simply forgetting to close of the toothpaste or not closing the toilet seat.

This **** lets a cheating woman take from his resources while thinking he gets "leverage " over her

I used to have your mentality. I carried it for most of my life.

I still carry it, though the anger faded and left only reality

Maybe you will want kids one day. Maybe you wont

Then again, maybe you're disgruntled because a woman already fvcked you over...

The best posters in sosuave history were disgruntled divorcees lol

Sh1t, disgruntled divorcees created the red pill and the manosphere. I watched it happen as a teenager, so how could I forget

20 years of red-pill life couldn't change the fact that I love kids and want my own kids.

I hate myself now for finding the red-pill. I think it saved me from a potential world of hurt, but also ruined a life I could have lived...

A life of being naive, settling down in my early 20s, having multiple kids.

And what purpose did it ultimately serve me? To get better at game and fvck a bunch of women? Great life. Boring, ultimately. Extremely unfulfilling.

Part of me wishes I didn't know what I know. I was angry for the longest time. Now I'm just sad about it all

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

I used to have your mentality. I carried it for most of my life.

I still carry it, though the anger faded and left only reality

Maybe you will want kids one day. Maybe you wont

Then again, maybe you're disgruntled because a woman already fvcked you over...

The best posters in sosuave history were disgruntled divorcees lol

Sh1t, disgruntled divorcees created the red pill and the manosphere. I watched it happen as a teenager, so how could I forget

20 years of red-pill life couldn't change the fact that I love kids and want my own kids.

I hate myself now for finding the red-pill. I think it saved me from a potential world of hurt, but also ruined a life I could have lived...

A life of being naive, settling down in my early 20s, having multiple kids.

And what purpose did it ultimately serve me? To get better at game and fvck a bunch of women? Great life. Boring, ultimately. Extremely unfulfilling.

Part of me wishes I didn't know what I know. I was angry for the longest time. Now I'm just sad about it all

I also came up at the forefront of the red-pill, so there was a lot of anger. A bunch of smart guys who'd been screwed over, looking to vent. Looking to let every other man know

I wish I'd have found sosuave 8 years later. I would have missed all the negativity

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

But life deals you a hand. Play it

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

I used to have your mentality. I carried it for most of my life.

I still carry it, though the anger faded and left only reality

Maybe you will want kids one day. Maybe you wont

Then again, maybe you're disgruntled because a woman already fvcked you over...

The best posters in sosuave history were disgruntled divorcees lol

Sh1t, disgruntled divorcees created the red pill and the manosphere. I watched it happen as a teenager, so how could I forget

20 years of red-pill life couldn't change the fact that I love kids and want my own kids.

I hate myself now for finding the red-pill. I think it saved me from a potential world of hurt, but also ruined a life I could have lived...

A life of being naive, settling down in my early 20s, having multiple kids.

And what purpose did it ultimately serve me? To get better at game and fvck a bunch of women? Great life. Boring, ultimately. Extremely unfulfilling.

Part of me wishes I didn't know what I know. I was angry for the longest time. Now I'm just sad about it all

I started posting again, thinking I would help the youth find the red-pill.

The red-pill is a fvcking mean burden to bare.

I soon realized, I don't want to pass it off to anyone

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

Take the fvcking blue pill.

Chance it.

You'll be better off

 

[BaronOfHair]

VMV, are you drunk posting? Recognize I'm likely asking a rhetorical question, nonetheless I couldn't resist the urge to do so

 

[Vanderdonck]

But I don't want her anymore.

So leave her. Quit making excuses.

 

[New_Journey]

Take the fvcking blue pill.

Chance it.

You'll be better off

Look Cypher, you already took the red pill, there is no going back, you're choking on it, swallow it for good.

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

Look Cypher, you already took the red pill, there is no going back, you're choking on it, swallow it for good.

I choked on it 22 years ago

Took me 15 years to get it down.

I have to remind this woman on a regular basis that we're done. She has a break down every time

Try that on for size and then give me advice

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

VMV, are you drunk posting? Recognize I'm likely asking a rhetorical question, nonetheless I couldn't resist the urge to do so

Absolutely

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

VMV, are you drunk posting? Recognize I'm likely asking a rhetorical question, nonetheless I couldn't resist the urge to do so

You're a beast, dude

I like your style

 

[Bokanovsky]

I want mention that there were no signs. I've been with women that lost interest, and there were always signs.

The signs are alway there. It's just that sometimes we miss those signs...or choose to ignore them. That's not a dig at you, by the way. We are all guilty of this to some extent.

The stoic philosophers, who I love, didn't touch on this subject

Stoic philosophers believed in the four virtues: wisdom, courage, justice and moderation. It seems like you already know what must be done (wisdom). You just need the courage to actually do it.

It's understandable that you would feel conflicted about the whole situation given your history with this woman. But at the end of the day, you simply can't trust her. It also seems that you are using her health issues to rationalize her bad behaviour. But does that really make sense? Why would a woman who goes through a near-death experience suddenly start sexting with her ex? Especially if you've been loyal and supportive during this period. Is it possible that she was doing shady sh!t behind your back even before her health complications and you simply didn't know?

 

[DJ Novice]

A woman should add to your base level of happiness over time.

If your base level of happiness (i.e. being single) is say 80%, then a woman should improve on this (to say 85 or ideally 90% over time.

If you find your happiness levels reduce (to say 75 or 70% or even lower in the example above) over time, then you really need to question why you are continuing to remain in that relationship.

What makes you happy is for you to determine; everyone is different.

The above analysis assumes you are comfortable being single. If your base level of happiness is very low to begin with (say 40%), expecting a woman to bump this up significantly (to say 75%) is unrealistic and even a small bump (to say 50%) will not make you fulfilled in the long term.

The fear of leaving a relationship past its use by date is often greater than the fear of staying due in part to the sunk cost fallacy (I’ve already invested x years and y $ into this relationship), nostalgia, fear of loss/being alone and the delusion that the other person will change (they won’t) or that you can recreate the feelings of the past (you can’t).

We have all been there at some point.

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

The signs are alway there. It's just that sometimes we miss those signs...or choose to ignore them. That's not a dig at you, by the way. We are all guilty of this to some extent.


Stoic philosophers believed in the four virtues: wisdom, courage, justice and moderation. It seems like you already know what must be done (wisdom). You just need the courage to actually do it.

It's understandable that you would feel conflicted about the whole situation given your history with this woman. But at the end of the day, you simply can't trust her. It also seems that you are using her health issues to rationalize her bad behaviour. But does that really make sense? Why would a woman who goes through a near-death experience suddenly start sexting with her ex? Especially if you've been loyal and supportive during this period. Is it possible that she was doing shady sh!t behind your back even before her health complications and you simply didn't know?

You've been one of the best posters on this forum for a decade, brother. Glad you're still here

We both started drinking too much after everything happened.

When I drink, I get brutally honest.

She blames her sexting another dude on me being an assh0le when I drink.

Granted, I can be an assh0le when I drink, but only because I don't hold back.

She says my drinking pushed her to sext her ex.

What do you you think?

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

There's been a tit for tat with us.

We both have drank too much since our child died

I thought we were on the same page...

Turns out she was two pages ahead

Women are always two pages ahead, because they're better at manipulation

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

I'm good if anyone is wondering.

I'm not sure how you stay sane with stuff like this...I've been staying off booze and drugs, for the most part

She still acts like nothing happened, which grinds my fvcking gears. I have to remind her occasionally

In her mind, she did nothing wrong. She's your typical woman ... Can't take responsibility for anything. Any time I bring up breaking up, she is always most concerned with how she looks in the deal.

I was drinking too much for a while. I called her fat (she's getting there) and caustic. She hates me for it.

Your boy ain't backing down, though. Steadfast on not being able to trust her ever again.