Let's Be Real Here Pt.3 - You should have started EARLIER

[CornbreadFed]

Good point on the sex drive of a young man. At 40, my sex drive is better than most 40 year old men. However, it is not the same as my sex drive at 18, 21, 25, or even 30.

Im 30 and I am noticing the decline in my drive and energy. The other day, I apparently pulled a leg muscle while having sex and I limped for half the next day.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Im 30 and I am noticing the decline in my drive and energy. The other day, I apparently pulled a leg muscle while having sex and I limped for half the next day.

Maybe it's time to lay off on the stunt sex?

 

[CBear]

I can never agree to being much older than a woman and having children later in life due to my partiality. Having grown up where both applied for my dad, I saw way more negatives than positives. I think this idea seems nice to some who have not experienced it or it's a reason to cope for late bloomers, but I'm in favor of developing all aspects of your life as soon as possible while finding a woman around your age or a little younger. But my reasoning and goals moreso apply to kids and wanting to be a part of their lives so that they grow to be successful in every aspect of their lives. I understand that that's not everyone's goal.

 

[CBear]

My point is that a man should start dealing with women as early as possible, in order to avoid the most common problems with them as an adult.

If a man has had his first intercourse at say 14, and was active and social, by the time he is 25 he would have been very seasoned. Thus very less likely to have oneitis.

The main problem with men now (as can be seen in most threads here) is that most men have lost their V-card at 18-19, had an LTR for a few years, then hit a dry spell. Thus having very little experience in mid/late 20s, and even just starting to date or have sex in their thirties.

I agree with your main message but losing your virginity at 14 is absolutely retarded. Let kids be kids. You can gain this experience in your late teens or early twenties and focus on growing all aspects of yourself as a young adult while gaining experiences with females as long as you're truly driven to do so.

 

[CornbreadFed]

One of the benefits of being on TRT is that you feel like you're 18 again, I don't have any of those problems you're having bro. But again, you said test is bad

I’ll live

 

[CornbreadFed]

Around 30 test starts to decrease, you should at least go check yout total and free test, won't lose anything, knowledge is power my friend.

My Test is fine lol. I prefer to live past 45 amigo.

 

[CornbreadFed]

I don't understand this statement.

I just said to do a test, like a cholesterol, kidneys, or a hemoglobin test, for you to see your total & free test levels.

I have and they are perfecto

 

[Bigpapa]

One of the things I never understood in the red pill was that you should focus on building your career and personality first, in order to have success with women in your mid/late thirties. I would argue that that is a very wrong approach, and can cause you negative effects varying from frustration to not being able to get a quality woman for an LTR, ever.

Let's be real here - the average male life expectancy around the world is 80 years and change (google it). 73 y.o. for the US. So there should be no excuse for not having experience with women in your whole first half of your life.

You should be prepared way before that. One of the issues that we can see that the red pill has actually created is 30 something men, who are either just getting started with dating or being red pilled.


One of my most successful classmates lost his virginity at 14, had an LTR or two afterwards, and was constantly replacing women (perhaps even running rotations), until he met a woman that satisfied all his requirements at 25, and had a kid at 27-28 with her. He also was progressing at work (currently mid management), and built his career simultaneously. I do not see a real reason why these cannot be done together. If you do not have enough time in your schedule - just cut off social media, youtube, tv, pc games or whatever sedation you have.

Contrary to him, I purposedly almost did not deal with women in my 20s (for various reasons), and have just started in my early 30s. I can say that this was one of the biggest mistakes in my life. Putting twice or thrice the effort for women or financial markets to make up for lost time won't net you double or triple results.

There's a saying - "There is a time and place for everything". A man should know when to start, when to be player, when to start selecting, when to select. Looking back, I should have been more extroverted and started dealing with women in my mid teens, and look for an LTR in my mid 20s. That makes plenty of time for building experience, and most importantly - choosing from women that have a better chance of being less damaged and easier to pair bond.

One of the biggest celebrities in the pick up communities (and a day game titan) - Paul Janka said in a recent podcast that his biggest regret was having a daughter at 39-40, because his father was already too old and saw her only once before he passed away.

Plenty of guys who are not that successful in life ( monetary wise - average maybe-) that have a normal sex life ( maybe 1-2 girls per year ) with decent girls ( 4-6 range )

I am at the seaside at the moment and see this with couples or with guys hitting at girls in the club

The financial aspect is more important if you aim for higher tier women

This is like till you are in your 30s

In your 30s and onwards the financial aspect becomes more and more important, especially if you do not want to date women in their late 30s or 40s ( or who knows, even older)

Plus money also helps you to to retain youthfulness better

 

[Bigpapa]

Where would a man go to learn how to deal with women?

Believe it or not, but the hippier places ( who attracts different types of people from ride or die hippies till corporate people ) are the best places to interact with people, as it is a laid back environment

Like a sea side place which is more laid back, you can stay there 1-3 months easily. Usually is very affordable too

 

[Smooth_texter]

I've never heard anyone say this. No reason you can't focus on more than one thing at a time.

Plenty of red pill influencers are saying this.

I respect Rich & Rollo, but I think that every man should experience an STR or LTR before his 30s. Otherwise, you won't know how it actually looks like.

I don't understand why a guy should choose between the two. Below is a clip with an 18 yo. caller, who has been in an LTR for 2.5 years with a woman his age. While I get that they are far too young (and probably have not experienced other partners), he can live with her for a few more years, and decide whether to have children with her. Sometimes, life would give you chances very early on (but you can turn them into f*ckups as well).

I strongly believe that it would be much harder for any man to get into an LTR with an 18 y.o. when he is 30+ y.o.

 

[Smooth_texter]

Where would a man go to learn how to deal with women?

Best to learn from experience, like everything else in life.

The only rule being using a condom. You should chase women, you should have flings, you should get your heart broken once or twice.

The point is to experience these very early on (14-19 y.o), get wiser and a thicker skin, in order to make the best decisions in your late 20s/early 30s (not just start from scratch at that age).

 

[Gamisch]

Nobody talks about the importance of balance.

I've been at it from a young age. 11,12 I geuss. Had my first serious relationship at 15. Was hitting women mid twenties when i was 17. Due to many factors I made p00sy THE most important thing in the galaxy. I'd rather be with a woman than having a career.
And women never gave a F. All they wanted me to be is Tyrone in the moment. But here's the thing; at some point you start to actually like a woman and you might wanna keep her. Now suddenly Tyrone's lack of everything becomes an issue. All the chips were gambled on women, and that's a terrible and fickle and ofcourse losing gamble.

At around 30 women start to expect more from men.( but might as well be 20, 22, 25 ect!) If you cant provide there will be a Tyrone/Chad just like you, but with just a little more focus on career ect. The sweet spot. She will monkey branche. As the next and the next.

Bottomline: I've learned game at a early age, got a good notch but except for some wild stories I have nothing to show for. Game skills faded due to long relationships, childern , some depressions left right, and a ever changing dating environment .

A career can't be build by simply "switching a button " in your mind. You need years, experience and hard work. Game on the other hand is merely a matter of finding place where your ego is satisfied with dealing with rejection and female behavior. If anything, a career is MANDATORY to be a 360 allround DJ. Unless you're willing to keep scraping women from the bottom of the barrel.

 

[DreamAgain]

Of course it's better to start earlier.

This is how you know if a girl truly likes you for you, and not your wallet, status, whatever.

Plus, you have more energy, look better, younger, have more time, are more carefree, etc.

Build your career/knowledge along the way.

Further, the best girls are usually locked up early, and the longer you wait, the more you will be left with the trash that circles the dating apps, bars, etc.

 

[BadBoy89]

Best to learn from experience, like everything else in life.

The only rule being using a condom. You should chase women, you should have flings, you should get your heart broken once or twice.

The point is to experience these very early on (14-19 y.o), get wiser and a thicker skin, in order to make the best decisions in your late 20s/early 30s (not just start from scratch at that age).

You are asking a 14 year old boy, who is brainwashed by the system that women are goddesses, who has no sisters or female cousins to be around, who cannot compete with the taller most gifted athletic boys, to talk to hot girls and learn from his mistakes.

This is not living in reality.

Any hot young girl, with any sort of look to her, will be taken immediately by the genetically blessed. For the hot girls, there is no substitute for being genetically blessed as a man. None,

 

[corrector]

Yeah, the biggest mistake both @MatureDJ and I did was to be in an all boys highschool. Probably set-up to fail as there was no exposure to women in a proper way during those years.

 

[The Duke]

Then its best to assume any woman that one enters a "monogamous" relationship with will fvck some other guy. So then would it not be prudent to just lie to women and fvck on the side?

Increase your own value. Select better women. You will alleviate a lot of problems.

 

[Smooth_texter]

I started early (12), but with an adult woman, so no awkward fumbling. I didn't settle down until I was in my early thirties with a woman in her early twenties. Had kids with her when I was forty and got divorced ten years later. I got the kids and she pays me alimony.
The women I date now are 20-30 and they like that I'm over fifty. Your sex life can improve in your 'old age' and you can still have sex with young women.

Hi AA.

I suppose the early start helped you to build the skill set and frame control to start and maintain a 20 year relationship with a woman in her early twenties.

And I agree that everything in life is uncertain, but the early start would definitely help to at least not have an "oneitis" in a man's late 20s/ early 30s. By that time one should be already very seasoned, otherwise it might be hard to compensate for lost time and opportunities.

 

[Smooth_texter]

I agree with your main message but losing your virginity at 14 is absolutely retarded. Let kids be kids. You can gain this experience in your late teens or early twenties and focus on growing all aspects of yourself as a young adult while gaining experiences with females as long as you're truly driven to do so.

While I understand your message, I think that at 14 a male is not a kid anymore. I remember when I was that age that my hormones were overflowing (but had anxieties and other things that prevented me to act upon it). Here is an article regarding the training of spartan boys in Ancient Sparta. I believe at least some of it was true. TLDR - they started at 7 years old, and purposedly were thrown in harsh conditions.


All of the actual men that I know and I think have managed to balance career, women and ultimately - building a family have started very early.

The whole idea is to already have the skills and experience to lock down and "tame" a twenty something woman, while you are also in your twenties. Plus, if you have started at 15, at 30 you would already have had fifteen years of hedonism - relationships, ONS, plate spinning.

 

[Smooth_texter]

We should have had done everything at the same time, okay, nice we got it, for those who didn't know what to do and are 30+ now, Can I borrow your time machine? Cause this post about what things should have done in the past doesn't do anyone a favor.

You are right, there isn't any advice for the 30+ year old here. The thread is more of a self reflection on what I think I should have done better.

But it would perhaps help some 18-22 old guys, who already have had some experience, to not become brainwashed, and complacent to think that at 30/35 you can just start dealing with women, and have a great balanced life by your late 30s.

 

[Smooth_texter]

Plenty of guys who are not that successful in life ( monetary wise - average maybe-) that have a normal sex life ( maybe 1-2 girls per year ) with decent girls ( 4-6 range )

I am at the seaside at the moment and see this with couples or with guys hitting at girls in the club

The financial aspect is more important if you aim for higher tier women

This is like till you are in your 30s

In your 30s and onwards the financial aspect becomes more and more important, especially if you do not want to date women in their late 30s or 40s ( or who knows, even older)

Plus money also helps you to to retain youthfulness better

I get your message, but I believe there is a time for a man to start, to be a player, and to settle.

I believe many of the men here in their 50s/40s and even 30s, after a certain point, would prefer a cute girl, who also is LTR/marriage material over short term flings with many damaged women.

Being in an LTR with a single woman your whole life would not be satisfying but so would be having only flings and constantly sourcing women.