Journal - Approaches on street, at mall, etc.

[NorwegianDJ]

Maybe you should take action in other aspects than going out and picking up chicks? What you're doing, although brave, is becoming a bit mundane. You're still keeping in your comfort zone after you've approached.

Try not only going further in your approaches (how are you expecting to get girls if you don't put yourself on the line? - Not just phone numbers!)

Also, what else could you be doing?

 

[LearningSlowly]

It's a roller coaster, you have to go down before you can go up (or are you slowly going up before an exciting breakthrough, the fall on a roller coaster?)

Persevere and there are no obstacles.

 

[Mindgamez]

NDJ thanks for tips. You're right about that.
Learning, cool analogy here. I promise to persevere.

Tuesday, November 20th
A normal day, except that I did a bit of gaming at the mall.
I just keep getting that creepy vibe for some reasons... I feel creepy and in the end, they're creeped out because I think that I am!

Whatever, let's start with school first.
So yeah. When I got in the class, the first thing that went through my mind was : Niya's too hot for me.
Once negativity settled inside of me, it's hard to get it out. But I'll just keep going. I know it's the right thing to do.
After my first class, Porno and me walk around and look around for people we know.
At the library, there's this very cute girl I talked to on the bus earlier. I sit next to her and she greets me with a very cute smile. We talked for a while.
It was interesting to see how she got happy when I was happy, and when she got a bit awkward when I did.
THE GIRL REACTS DIRECTLY TO HOW YOU'RE FEELING INTERNALLY. Most of the time at least.
Since she wanted to become a physiotherapist, I asked her if she could give me a massage. She gave me the eyebrows... I pussied out to ask for her number fck! We exchange hugs and eject because I have to go to class.

I chat with new people again, like usual (which is good).
The problem is that with girls I don't know, I feel more uncomfortable than with guys I don't know. I connect with guys very quickly sometimes, NO PROBLEM. But with girls?... I don't allow myself to simply be myself, when I simply could.

At mall
My first approaches are average. I feel not in state at all. It's not only anxiety, but negativity that goes through me. I personally like better to be nervous as hell but excited, instead of feeling bad and being not so nervous.

So there's this high school girl, HB8 easy.
So I approach her, and this time I'm feeling better. I've built just a bit of momentum during the time.
I directly tell her that she's really cute, along with a smile. It was sincere this time.
I start chatting for a bit but she walks away with a smile.
I then mention the absurdity of the situation by acknowledging that it's a bit awkward.
So we walk for a while, but then I decide to stop and keep talking. So she stops too.
Apparently she was waiting for her date! Haha damn... XD
I tell her that it doesn't matter and that we could still hangout sometimes. She says yeah, but I can't tell if it's sincere or not.
Me : Since I really gotta go, we should exchange phone numbers and we'll talk again later.
This wasn't true... I had time to connect with her but I was *****ing out.
She : Hummm, I can add you on facebook!
Me : Nah nevermind, I hate facebook.
Blabla, not much is said. The vibe was not too bad though.
Me : Okay, what about this? I give you a farewell hug, and we'll never see each other again.
I extend my arm,s and see her facial expression change. I couldn't quite tell what it meant. Maybe she was disappointed? Or just a bit scared? Or was she reacting...
Maybe was it the time for me to strike? AHHH I should have said something like : Just kidding! We'll meet again, don't worry.
Whatever, she gave me a pretty tight hug and we exchange goodbyes.

Girls I pickup give me tight hugs, girls I hug at school give me normal or weak ones.

Whatever.

Conclusion
- Since I can now read social cues better than usual, I must not be fazed by any negative reactions I get. It's a great thing to know, so you know when she's not so interested or when she actually is. I have to use it wisely though.
- The girl directly reacts to how you're feeling most of the time. If you're feeling awkward, she will. If you're feeling great, she will. If you're feeling comfortable, she probably will too.
- I. Must. Persist.

 

[Mindgamez]

Sometimes, I feel like if I could just cry, everything could go away. But I'm not sad enough to cry.
Then, something clicked.
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=106526
I was trying to become someone I already was. I realized that the more I tried to be myself, the further I was from being myself. My real self. My true self. This ideal I am reaching for, is actually me. I could be him right now. I could be me right now. I simply am and no need to try.

Wednesday, November 21st

Right before filmmaking class, I sit next to some girl I already talked to before. It is some girl's friend, the friend of the girl that was hitting on me at Staples. She's hot, HB8. Let's call her HB Ash
I sit next to her and I'm with Gary.
Her : When's your birthday?
Me : Why? You wanna come?
Her : Yeah
Blablabla. I tell her that she's pretty cool and that we should chill sometimes. She agrees with a smile.
THOUGH when I'm about to ask for her number, she leaves the chair to go to class! Whatever lol.

Thursday, November 22nd
Cool day cool day!

I meet up with HB Indi way early before class, because our previous class was cancelled. We chill on the bench for like 45 minutes till her friends come. We chat a bit, it's fun. Too bad she has a boyfriend damnit!

In writing class, I touch her boob and she laughs! I literally poke it LOLOLOL. It was kind of an accident, because I tried to poke her fast to take my revenge. I ended up poking her boob directly.

The girl that was hitting on me at Staples saw me again in the hallway. We chatted for a bit.
Her : Hey, do you remember her?
It was her friend, pretty damn hot HB8.5
Me : I don't know her.
8.5 : But I remember you!
Her : She was with me at Staples!
Me : Oh yeah! The day you were lifting your boobs up.
8.5 : Yeaaaaah, did you like it?
They giggled, and I told that my asian friend liked it. He seemed a bit awkward LOL.
Blablalbalbalbla. I was about to introduce myself to the hot friend but they already left after that.

MALL GAME
After I'm done with class I tell Gary that I'm not so down for pickups because I'm tired, I have an annoying heartburn and my shoulders hurt as hell from my previous workout.
We still decide to go.
The whole evening, I was feeling quite alright. Not fantastic, not natural, but alright.

I approached a set of two girls HB8, and I didn't realize that one of them went to my elementary school! SH1T lol! She changed so much... she got much hotter.

I thanked Gary for bringing me to the mall that day.

Friday, November 23rd
Getting better and better!

During the break, I do some epic dance battle in the middle of the hallway and everyone stops by to look at us. My friend was filming and all the attention was drawn on me. I felt it but I knew that I had to keep doing my thing.

I see HB Ash passing by again. We exchange hugs, I let my hand linger a bit after. She tells me that she has to go but will be right back. That's not a bad sign.
Me : Oh, but when you'll be back I won't be here anymore!
She smiles, and comes back 2 minutes later. Though, she's on her cellphone by herself and I just keep talking to my friends about the video we're planning on doing. The dance batttllleeeeee! But you know what? I didn't strike while it was time.
She was waiting for me. If not, well I could pretend like she was and make her laugh.
AH! So I just let her leave and say goodbye.
10 minutes later, I see her pass by again and I ask her if she's following me XD. FCKIN DIDN'T ASK FOR THE PHONE NUMBER DAMNIT! I WAIT TOO LONG WTF!

I swear next time I'm GOING. no excuses.

Almost forgot!
You know the girl I got the number? I tried to call her again, but she didn't respond.
I texted her something like

Me : We could've had 14 children and got married, but no! You missed your chance.
Her : What??
Me : Don't be shy and answer your calls, I don't bite
Her : You didn't even call me...
Me : Yeah ;o Ok call me to see if it works

And she never called I'm fine with that. Whatever.

MALL GAME
This time, I'm the one to push Gary to go game at the mall. He wasn't so down, because he was worried about his upcoming date (YES he got it! I'm happy for him. Let's hope it doesn't turn out to friendzone...)
So at first, we stay in the car and I show him a couple of good songs I listen to to pump myself up. The 2012 songs I set for myself. Those 10-15 minutes were not wasted.

First approach! I hesitate a bit, but Gary goes in and asks the creepy question to the girls.
Gary : Hey, do you girls like candies? I got candies in my car. (or something like that)
I did sound pretty creepy to me LOL. I saw the expression on the girls' faces change a bit.
They were 14! Fawk... I talked to the one that seemed older, but I was repelled by the fact that they were 14. They looked young too.

Second approach lasted nearly 20 minutes!
I hesitated for a while and told Gary that I wasn't ready for that one, blablabla. He tells me that we must go, so we do. After 2-3 minutes of hesitation. He goes in first and then I join in.
The conversation was nice and the girls would laugh a lot. There was an HB8, pretty hot. Her accent was hot too.
I had the right things to say at the right time to be funny. She even told me that I was very funny and cool, which is great. He did some high fives here and there.
After one of her 3 friends had to go, I took her place on the sofa and sat right next to the HB8. We talked for a while and I tried to move things forward but she wouldn't tell me her name or her origins or anything.
WHAT HELPED ME : SAYING WHATEVER WAS ON MY MIND. It works, as long as you're congruent and genuine with what you say. It can be a bit of non-sense and it's totally cool. When I run out of things to say, I just ask them what's their favourite kind of pie, and it releases the tension. After that, I feel like I can say anything and it doesn't matter.
I managed to be entertaining, but she still wasn't interested in the end. Maybe wasn't I flirting enough? And the problem is that she kept repeating that she didn't know us and that we were strangers. Though, the girl was still enjoying the conversation a lot and I could tell.

I have the conversation recorded in French and I can post it on this journal, but 90% of you guys probably won't understand a word of it.
What I noticed from the recording is that my voice would go up too much sometimes, which is gay hahaha! Or when the girl would say something, I would acknowledge it by repeating it and saying : It's cool it's cool. I notice that I validate the girls too much for nothing and laugh at what they say a bit too much. Or maybe I just laugh because I'm nervous.
Though, I was much better on this one and I laughed mostly during the parts I though was funny. My voice was stronger too. It's maybe a bit fake and I have to be more natural with my voice. A bit forced.

Doesn't matter! This interaction was good until it died down. I ended up with no number. She still gave us a wonderful smile before farewells.

Then, talked to some girl from my school at the mall. I actually recorded a little bit of it, and I noticed how I would simply fail **** tests. I would try and justify myself sometimes.
Though, her friend was hot, even though in high school.
Her : Oh, I felt something on my leg. I wonder what it is!
She smiles.
Me : Oh it was me. Nothing intended here!
She giggles. I could've gone further from here, but I didn'T want to do it in front of the other girl...
Wait, WTF? The fact that she's 15 is not much of a problem. The problem is that I'm a ***** sometimes...

Conclusion
- LISTEN TO YOUR RECORDINGS AGAIN. You will never progress if you don't fix your mistakes from last time. Trust me, it is worth it.
- Always fix your mistakes. Try something new.
- Some little trick : Imagine yourself with the girl as the perfect couple. Doesn't matter if she's taller.
- Cheer up your friends that cheer you up. Get pick up buddies! Ask the people around you if they're into picking up random chicks.
- When you try too much to be yourself, you're actually distancing yourself from your real self. How can you try to be something you already are? A stone doesn't need to question itself if it's a stone or not. It simply is. I AM A MAN. MEN WERE CREATED TO REPRODUCE WITH WOMEN. There's no way I'm wrong.

 

[Mindgamez]

As I get home, I pull out a piece of paper and write this.
November 28th, 4:18 PM
First snow.
A new beginning.
4th Quarter. Make it happen.
EVERY DAY. PUSH MYSELF TO 120%

Signed my name at the bottom.

I feel like I'm not really progressing anymore. Whatever, I MUST keep going.
And understand that patience is a virtue. Wanting the results right now won't help. I must push through.

Saturday, November 24th
Went to metal concert!
For some reason, I was totally UNABLE to approach girls. To socialize in general. My natural friend Dumi would hug girls left and right, but I wouldn't because I was too shy. It was terrible... At the end of the day, a girl was kind of expecting a hug from me, but I just waved goodbye and she looked at me weird.
Dumi : Hahaha! He wanted a hug but fail XD.
It was definitely awkward LOL. Whatever.

Sunday, November 25th
With Sex_is_good and his wingman, we did some daygame at the usual place.
My approaches had nothing special in terms of results. Nothing happened really to be honest.
I was out of state and not feeling it. I still managed to get that girl's facebook. It was her real facebook, except that she never responded the invitation.

It was still fun

On the way back home, I did one approach by myself. I was nervous at the beginning, but as the interaction went forward, I started reaching that point of I don't care. I felt good at the end.

The words I said to end the conversation have never been so true to me before.

APPROACHES RECORDED.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4RuoCXY-xc&feature=youtu.be

Tuesday, November 27th

I can't remember what happened really.
My tiredness killed me... I finished my essay at 2:30AM the night before. I was dead...

Wednesday, November 28th
DAMN essays gotta hate'em.

Guess what? I had another one due that day (actually the day before, but I had no choice but to hand it late).
Finished it at like 1:00AM or so.

Then, I spent the rest of my day editing my video for an assignment.
The girl next to us was really hot. We talked and took funny pictures together. It was really funny. Too bad she has a boyfriend and is probably older than me!
I farted on them and she told me that she was scared. Until I told her it was a prank.

As I get home, I pull out a piece of paper and write this.
November 28th, 4:18 PM
First snow.
A new beginning.
4th Quarter. Make it happen.
EVERY DAY. PUSH MYSELF TO 120%

Signed my name at the bottom.

Thursday, November 29th
FINALLY got the number of some girl at school. Why can't I ever manage to do that? It felt natural since I didn't care about the outcome.

She was a 6 or 6.5. Alright, but that's OKAY. At least I did something.

So when she came at the chilling place, we chatted for a bit. I sat next to her, I lied my feet on her legs because I though it was funny.
So I'm just chilling on my phone, and then I simply go like this.
Me : How do you spell your name?____?
I type it in my phone as she tell me. Then, I just give her my phone and she punches her number in.
Her : Oh wait.
She checks for her number.
Me : Oh WUT? You don't know your number? Lol muther****er!
Hahaha XD. Then she asks for my number and I eject. I literally didn't care so much about it as I was talking to the other guy about metal. It felt natural.

I don't think I'll ever go on a date with her. What I can do is chill around school with her just for the fun of it.

Conclusion
- I must stop HARASSING girls for their age and names! Hahaha...
- I should not wait before reapproaching. Next time I'll stay in the set longer so I don't have to come back again.

I really want to end 2012 well. When I saw the snow, I was so happy for some reason.
It reminded me of all the good times I had as a child, living in the present moment.
I remember those fun days of endless snowboarding. And I remember the school trip back in the day. I was snowboarding with Laos and we were having so much fun. It was the perfect time to be pro, but I didn't do anything about it. It doesn't matter because it is the past.

New snow, white like a blank page. It's time to start something fresh.
2013 is going to be twice the fun. I can't wait for 2013.

 

[LearningSlowly]

The number close was pro status. Next time use that close on someone you actually want.

I bet you're beginning to develop a repertoire. You know which jokes to say at the right times because you've been there before. Girls you cold approach enjoy themselves because you have a response for everything they do, and they see you're in control.

The fact is, you do not have this kind of experience for dates. Work on getting first dates. Master the art of the first date.

 

[Mindgamez]

Learning your support cheers me up. Thanks man! And when I really think about it, you're right that I'm starting to get how things work and what to do at what time, along with what to say.

True that for dates. I have zero experience in this yet. I can still go for that 6, why not? She ain't mean. If I end up feeling no attraction, I can just go for a friendly date and that's cool too.



Just bought the book The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle!
I used to own a hacked copy of it, but I better like to have the actual physical book in my hands. And why not support this dude that will probably change my life, with 16 bucks?

This book is fantastic. Thanks Tyler for suggesting it.

I RECOMMEND IT TO ANYONE. GO BUY IT. GET OFF YOUR DAMN PICKUP MATERIAL AND READ THIS

 

[Mindgamez]

Saturday, December 1st
I wake up with another wet dream! Damn.
I initially planned on going to a 16+ party (which would've been beyond epic with the 300-400 people or so), but I figured that it would be better if I took the time to sleep well instead, and do homework. Laziness overcame me, and I didn't do anything anyway... >_<
GOT number closed by a girl. And guess what? I was retarded! HAHA listen to the approach on video, it's the last one!
Oh, also... I practised my body language in front of the mirror before going out. Sounds ridiculous, but it does help you feel better about yourself LOL.

So yeah
Daygame with Sex_is_good and Cedric his friend. He's a cool guy

Before they came, I was reading The Power of Now. Listening to the Christmas music and seeing the happy people joining in the mall gave me a pretty good mood. I kept listening to Animals as Leaders to pump me up. I love this band.

Animals As Leaders - "CAFO" Prosthetic Records - YouTube

I see a girl. HB8.5
Oh ****! Damn she's hot. I gotta talk to her. I gotta learn to do it by myself. GO.
So I wait. Anxiety builds up a bit, but I manage to stay calm. I wait for her to pass by. Bam I open.
Me : Oh hey, I though that you were really beautiful and I had to come talk to you.
Her : Oh thank you!
We exchange names, we shake hands. We started talking for a bit about I really don't remember what.
The conversation was cool at first. She was smiling the whole time, but she seemed to be walking around and away from me a bit. Then she pulled out her phone.
Me : Oh wait, who are you calling?
Her : I'm calling my cousin
Me : Well tell her that you're too busy to talk and that you're talking with the most awesome guy in the world!
She giggles, it's fun. Blablabla
For an approach done alone, I was surprised by how it's just the same as being with a wing. It's the same exact thing... the difference is that you don't feel that rush like you must eject as soon as possible to go see your friends again. You feel like you don't have the trouble of time. You feel like things are more appropriate to transition to an instant date, or simply talk for long.
But she couldn't since she was waiting for her cousin.
Me : Oh well since we have to go separate ways, what about we exchange numbers and talk again later?
Her : Mhmhmhm ohh I don't think my boyfriend will like that!
Me : Ahhh well it's simple! Your boyfriend can meetup with you on Monday, I see you Tuesday, he sees you Wednesday, I see you Thursday, and so on!
She finds it funny, but I already said that line before, many times already. I'm kinda tired of saying the same things over and over again.
To be honest, the conversation was going good at first because I came close to her and it was cool. But then, for some unexplained reason I backed off a bit and kept a distance. She had to leave, we wave goodbyes.

I feel like approaching is no different from a girl to another right now. But it should be, right? It should be an adventure on every approach, something new to try and discover. I have to stop repeating the same things and talk about the same stuff. I'm not having enough fun and it almost feels like a chore sometimes. I just keep forcing myself to do it.

Anyway, the other approaches are RECORDED! Check it out.

Approached some HB9, she was hot.
The others were rejections and rejections. Sometimes, she just completely ignored me, like totally! then I realized that I was like to sudden in my approaches. It's better if I open her from far than wait for her to be super close and pop some : OH SCUSE MEH! and she's already gone.

Then, there was this asian chick on the phone. HB8.
This time, I focused more on my body language.
I was talking to her, but she literally stopped talking on the phone to talk to me.
BUT, the funny thing was that she never hung up her phone and she just kept talking with the phone on her ear LOL.
I told her that she was beautiful, blablabla. I tell her to tell the person she's talking to that she's too busy because she's talking to some epic guy, blablabla. Giggles, it's fun.
Then she starts walking away, and this is where I lose my state and supplicate a bit.
Me : Noo way, really you're really cool and we should hang out sometimes! Okay, what about this?
I say the usual line I say something like : What about I give you my number and it's either you go Mhmhmhmh nah, or you go Mhmhmhmh okay! It's up to you.
Her : Allright!
So then she gives me her phone and I enter my number. She never called back

Same for that last approach when the girl asked for my number.

Anyway, you guys watch recordings!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NDMnWkZ4QX8

Conclusion
- Approaching by yourself or with a wing is the SAME EXACT THING. Don't rely on them as a clutch.
- No matter on the phone or not, make to excuse. GO.
- When the girl asks for your number, GET HERS and don't be douchy like you're giving out your number and try to act non-needy. In this case, I just forgot and was retarded but that's okay. We all learn XD...
- When you win the group, the girl is more likely to give you her number without feeling like a slut.
- Talk loud and make sure everyone hears you! It's key. If you have to repeat yourself, you're not talking loud enough. Take up space.

 

[Mindgamez]

I think I'm suffering from some minor form of bipolar syndrome. Is the online survey right or is it all bull****? I don't know, but I do struggle with some weird roller coaster feelings all the time.

Tuesday, December 4th
I workout early in the morning, then chill with HB Indi once again.
After class, I chill with Gary. We socialize around the school and my memory's pretty bad on that one.

We spent an hour talking about how we wanted to climb up the social ladder for 2013 and own the ****.
AND WE WILL TOGETHER!
Then, I went back home and worked on my projects for school.

Wednesday, December 5th
Chilled with the 7 I number closed the other day!
1 on 1. It felt like a DATE literally.

So yeah,
When I see her, we exchange hugs. She welcomes me with a smile. She asks me if I have cash for lunch (she was about to pay for me!), but I tell her that I had lunch already.
So I lead her to what Gary and me call *The Pillow Room*. It has so many pillows and it's great. It's actually some religious club with a cool ambiance : dim lights, colourful walls, etc.

That awkward vibe was there during the whole interaction, especially at the beginning...
I was thinking about what to say next, and when I would say something, she would simply nod and not add anything else.
When silence happened, what did I do? I just asked the most random question to the dude next to me, or just whistle and look around. When I would think of what to say next, I'd just blank out because I think it's not the right thing to say, etc. This ends up in me getting nervous.
I managed to make it playful, tease her, and I even asked her to give me a massage. It was funny, though she didn't gave it to me XD.

After 45 minutes or so, Gary calls me and I meetup with him.

LOL WTF.
So Jen, girl I met 1st week of the semester in the bus line just keeps kicking, pushing and poking me. Funny. She's cute but has a boyfriend. I have no intention of dating her whatsoever.
Her friend was pretty funny too and she joined the poking fight. Boyfriend too!
So yeah. They were basically trying to steal my phone and when they did, they would hide it in their bras. Girls are funny and fun, it's a different vibe that you get from guys.

AH, NOT A FLAKE!
The girl that number closed me downtown actually texted me after like a week!
I wait to text her back... Was it a good choice? I waited till Friday, but then she didn't respond yet.

Thursday, December 6th
Morning, I work on essay.
Go to class,
Go home early and work again!

Friday, December 7th
Me : Gary, you still wanna do pickups today?
Gary : I don't know man. You wanna?
Me : Well I know it's the right thing to do.

We hesitated at first, but we ended up going anyway.

Before going in, we stayed in the car to meditate for a while. Then, we took a 20 minute nap and I felt too tired to go lol. But I knew what was the right thing to do.

We go in the mall. At first, I'm feeling unmotivated and have this negative vibe haunting me. I knew that the best way to get rid of it was to approach. So I did! The first approach gave me a bit of momentum.
Even though I was in a negative state, I was not outcome dependent and things were cool.
She actually said to me : Where are we going?
I realized it later when I listened to the recording. I remember myself hesitating.
Whatever. They looked young, were probably young. I wasn't down for them. Good practice anyway.

We proceeded to saying hello to random strangers and having fun just to get the ball rolling. It's a good way
Asked random people if their name was Roberto. It's always super funny.

Approached some girls left and right, can't quite remember everything.

There was this girl sitting on the couch, a good HB7.
Made her laugh, lead the conversation to sexual stuff. Joked that I studied sexology at school, made prono movies.
She waited until the end of the conversation to ask me if I was single or not. Ends up that she has a boyfriend!
Doesn't matter. I get her number, even though she doesn't text back it's still all good. Good 7 minutes or so of conversation. I didn't put it in the video because half of it was in French anyway.

Asked for a fivesome! Positive reaction, I wasn't expecting this. But things still went cool. (Look at video)

Did a couple more. At the end of the day, I was reaching a good state and I was talking to this little girl that seemed to be 15 years old. End up that she was 18! She was kinda cute, but she looked so young...
I was in total control and not fazed because I didn't care about getting her. I just talked to talk.
She went into hardcore interview mode and asked me question after question!
I farted on her with the farting machine and she just laughed, thinking it was real. I did it like 3-4 times nastily. I didn't give a **** and was totally not embarrassed HAHAHAHAHA. I'm so immature but it's funny.
Should have told her that it was a joke though...

So yeah. On the way out, Gary pretended that he was selling weed to some guys. I end up joining the convo.
Apparently the guy knew us! From where? From the video where I was dancing in a carrot costume downtown!
Oh yeaahh.
He's down to be in one of our next videos. Great stuff.

Approaches RECORDED.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sa2dFSGVlIA&feature=youtu.be

CONCLUSION
- Even though you're in a negative state, keep on the calmness and the non-neediness. Practice anyway.
- It doesn't matter how direct you are guys! If you're totally confident and cool with it, she'll just giggle and accept whatever.
- BE LOUD! It helps a lot.
- Once she starts walking off, don't use that needy-weak voice to get them back. Stand your ground and persist like a boss. I did a mistake
- Get the ball rolling by just getting into a social mode! Talk to anyone, have fun.
- I laugh for no reason too much to defuse the tension! That's baaddd.

What's coming up next!
NIGHTGAME.
That's it. Tonight, Saturday 8th, is the night.
I'll go super physical, escalate, isolate, do all I have to do.
I'm not afraid, not afraid of all these guys and girls! They're fun people. They aren't all *****es and douchebags. If they are, well that's totally fine.

From now on, I don't get affected by outside negativity.
From now on, I don't get affected by inside negativity.

LET'S FCKING GO.

 

[Mindgamez]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OVoseNljKr4

11:15 PM
What if I never get a girl? What if this wasn't made for me? Maybe all these efforts don't really lead to somewhere.
I sighed. I wasn't feeling unconfident, but I was feeling sad. I could almost say depressed. The same kind of feeling I got when my first and only girlfriend dumped me 4 years ago. I grabbed my backpack and left the place. I walked back to the metro by myself. I somehow felt lonely.
But that is totally fine.

NIGHTGAME
Saturday, December 8th
Grinded some girl, approached almost every girl at the place.
Good or bad night?
Right now, rethinking about it, I'm feeling totally fine. But back in the moment, it was chaotic in my mind! Holy shiet I my state was going downhill...
Throughout the night, I wasn't feeling horny for some reasons. Not really excited! I wasn't really having that much fun, but I was constantly approaching because I knew I had to.

So first off,
I enter the place. I see a bunch of girls everywhere. Can't see their faces! It's so damn dark everywhere...

I approach the first girl. HB7.
I wasn't that nervous to be honest. Maybe because she wasn't the hottest
I just present myself, shake hands. I go physical a bit, she comes closer and rubs herself on me a bit.
I proceed to the grinding! Easy sh1t.
How did I make it so easy? I don't know!
Though, midway through the grinding I realized that I wasn't horny at all and that she was grinding a flacid penis LOL.
Wait, what am I doing? I'm not even horny/excited/enjoying myself. Though she smells good and her hair feels nice on my neck. But I dunno... aghh.
Me : Hey, I gotta go to the bathroom I'll be back!
So I go to the bathroom. I didn't even want to pee or anything. I just stayed for a while and started thinking about what I could do once I get out. I though that it was useless to think, so I just went out.

Approached a couple of girls on the way. Got blown out!
I was more nervous this time, less genuine. I think I was pulling too much and not pushing. I wasn't sure how I should push or anything. The girl stayed unreactive.
Girl : I might want to dance later. *tap on the arm*
I think this meant that she wanted me to leave lol.

Can't remember all of them. Some were just complete rejections. The girl looked at me with a weird expression and walked off XD hahahaha. my default response to that would be : Are you racist??
Since I was one of the 3 only asian guys. The 2 others were my chody friends lol.
I approached other groups. Some were receptive and laughing. Some were just for warmup since they were probably like 14 year olds LOL.
Asked a couple groups if they were down for fivesome/sixsomes. It was with Mirthless, pretty cool guy. For some reason he got rejected a lot too, even though he seemed pretty confident to me!

So there was this other HB7.5
She was with a group of friends. The whole group was alright with me at first.
The girl I was flirting with was constantly smiling and having fun! Though, she avoided eye contact (maybe she was shy?)
So I was going physical too. I can't remember everything about it though.
I would say the most random things sometimes, and it made her laugh a lot. I asked her if she liked spongebob.
Me : Oh yeaah I love spongebob! On our future date, we're going to the movies to see spongebob.
It was funny lolool.
I would simply wrap my arm around her waist. She was fine with that. She smiled and everything. Though, after a little while she went back to talking to her friends. Maybe too much pulling and not enough pushing? Or the pushing wasn't alright?
Me : Heey you, I hate you! I really hate you! *smile*
Her : Ohhh why???
Me ; Ohh because, you know, I'm sorry. It won't happen. I know it's sad, but I'm sorry! *tap on shoulder*
She laughs more and more. The friends were laughing too if I remember.
I think I know what's wrong! I didn't talk to the group enough. The friends weren't too fine with me talking to her and escalating so fast, so they were on the defensive side.
During a reapproach, one of their friends had a cold look of fear. Eyes widened.
Me : Hey, are you okay?
Her : Yeah yeah!
Me : You're sure about that?
Her : Yeah yeah!
Mhmhm, she didn't seem okay.
So I reapproached again, but damn that *****y looking friend was totally ****blocking me. Though, I'm not sure that the HB7.5 was down. Maybe she wasn't, or maybe she was but just backing off because shy or didn't want to appear as a slut? They finally told me to **** off, the whole group. Only the HB7.5 wasn't really being a *****! She didn't seem annoyed or anything.
WTF DOES THAT MEAN!!!! ARGHH!!
Lesson : WIN THE GROUP. Once it's done, ISOLATE GIRL.

At this point, my state really went downhill. I have to talk to the whole group, approach the whole group. Lesson learned.

I just love these moments when I can just take an objective standpoint on the situation and analyse what went good or wrong. Then after everything's analysed, I feel like I improve. It's fascinating. When I'm out of state, no objectivity and intelligent can kick in. It's a big chaos, a big mess.

 

[Mindgamez]

HB9!
Holy damn she was pretty hot.
So I go in. Since I was attracted, it felt more genuine.
I call her up on her crossing her arms.
Me : Hey you shouldn't cross your arms when you talk to people.
I go in direct, high energy. I get her name, go physical and tell her that she's beautiful.
She gives me the beautiful smile. I tell her that we could get married, have 15 kids and live on a beautiful deserted island for the rest of our lives. She smiles, blablabla. (I used that line with the 7.5 too).
She seemed pretty receptive to me, until she backed off when I came in closer.
Maybe I wasn't leaning back enough? Instead of coming close, I could've pulled her in instead.
I reapproached her, touched her hair and told her that it was beautiful. Genuine She gave a wonderful smile. Damn fcking hot.
Me : Okay, you drive me crazy.
I come in closer. I had the intention to go in for the kiss, but she backed off. The smile again...
What does that mean? Maybe I have to back off and create a bit of tension here and there?
I tried to push this time, kind of like I did with the HB7.5. I though ti was funny so that's why I did it that way.
Maybe I simply wasn't confident enough? Damn she was hot.
The friends were okay, but then they politely told me that her friend's not interested with a smile. These approaches give me a better mood
Too bad... She seemed interested but not at the same time. She didn't really talk about when we were talking. Maybe was I trying too much? I have to make her engage in the conversation. Oh yeah, I'll make her talk next time!

So yeah, I ejected.
My state was going downhill, and Mirthless and me realized that we almost approached literally every girl at the place!
Mirth : Do you want to leave or what?
Me : No no, I have to do one last approach before.
Mirth : Alright alright. One last one!
Me : Alright, let me meditate for a while.
Mirth : Alright, do it man.
I looked at the ground, focused my attention on the nothing, on the now, on the silence that existed behind the incessant music and chatting. Yes, it was there, and I could focus on the present moment. I was feeling calmer, but at the same time energized. This familiar feeling I got so often when I realized that there is nothing else in this world but the now.
Me : ALRIGHT!

I get off the wall I was leaning on and approach the set of girls right next to me. She was kinda fat, a 6.
Doesn't matter. I was feeling in control this time, much better. Though, the feeling didn't last that long. Their friend right next was kinda hot, so I decide to introduce myself to her.
She doesn't smile, doesn't shake hands. I was unreactive at first, but her negative vibe repelled me... I called her *****, but then realized that this lead to nothing because I didn't expect to attract her anyways. True that she was even though I wasn't acting like an ******* at all. Some girls are just like that I guess. Later during the night, I realized that she was totally affected by me calling her a *****. I apologize but she doesn't take my apology.
It's not her fault after all. Some people are just negative and they don't know they're trapped in it. They get deeper down.
The difference with me is that I know when it happens and I know how to get up.

Though, after this I didn't feel like approaching any other girls really. I just wandered around with Mirthless. I lose my chody asian friends! Whatever.
On the way out, Mirthless tells me how he's never going to any other All Ages party ever again. Girls are too immature and too *****y. It is true, but where is the best way to learn? In difficult environments. The more sh1t that happens to you, the more immune you become towards it. The more of a man you become.
That's why I'm going to every All Ages party I can. My friends can't come? That's fine, I'll go by myself.

That's what I'm thinking right now, but during the night, my thoughts were bringing me down.
I walked back to the metro by myself and thought that maybe success wasn't meant for me. Maybe It's all bullsh1t and it will never happen. For a second of two, I sincerely believed that, and I felt so depressed.
On the way back home, I listened to SP's podcast. It cheered me up. Rejections are fun after all. I started looking a bit more at the positive.
The next day, I woke up feeling much better.

CONCLUSION
- No real good stuff that happened? It's fine. I still progress.
- WIN THE GROUP! Even if the girl is enjoying her time, the friends might see your very quick escalation as a threat. Be careful.
- Instead of coming closer to her all the time, maybe lean back and relax a little bit to make her invest in the conversation more. Then, pull her in instead of coming closer and closer. Just feel good, relax
- Who cares man? It's your life, a little no from a girl won't hurt you. What's a big no to you? The girl shouting in your face to gtfo? Who cares, she's missing a good opportunity to meet you.
- It's not their fault of they're negative. They're trapped in it and they don't know that they are.

What's coming up next!
Tuesday and Wednesday, last days of school for 2012!
I'm going social mode all this time. After school, I chill around the school until the end. It's going to be cool!
GARY'S THE SH!T! TANANANAN NANANAN. WHOOO SHIET.

 

[Mindgamez]

Thursday December 13th, 9:25PM
I get off the bus. The walk back home is pleasant and calm.
Architects is playing.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHHJF2cUwyY
Deception hides in all you see
Corruption hangs in the air that you breathe
And in the land of the free
You know nothing comes for free
I'm not living to feel stimulation. Nor am I living for happiness or to avoid sadness. I'm living to live the life to the fullest, to develop myself fully. That's the pride of living.
The pleasure is in the adventure. It's not in happiness itself. I am not needy for happiness. Paradoxically, this is what I get from this mindset.
After more than 200 approaches to get my confidence up, FINALLY got it.

DAMN so much to write about. But read through.

BTW : 70 days no fap!

Tuesday, December 11th
There was a little latin dance class at the agora of the school.
There was a bunch of girls everywhere, but I pussied out from talking to them...
There still was Jen, girl I met 1st week of the semester. She's pretty funny.
I danced with her ugly friend. The next day, she was a ***** and wouldn't even shake hands with me! Wtf... ugly unconfident chicks I guess XD.

I join Gary's class on the random LOL. I planned on chatting with random people but I pussied out... just talked to a couple random guys, no girls.

Wednesday, December 12th
LAST DAY OF SCHOOL!

I start off and arrive late to the exam... Ugh.
Doesn't matter. After this, I edit my short film. DAMN it's probably one of my best ones yet. If you want to see it, just PM me.
After this, I meetup with Porno (it's been a while since last time!)
When we see Gary too, we decide that we want to game a bit.

SO!
We start with the staring prank. We sit next to some random girl and we all stare at her without saying a word for like a full minute. It got us in a better mood.
On the way, I just kept seeing my friends, giving hugs to everyone and wishing merry xmas to guys and girls. It was pleasant.
Oh... the girl I wanted to number close... Gary and Porno made me run to her literally! She saw them pushing me to her, and then I had no other choice but to talk to her.
Apparently she couldn't smile because of her surgery lol! Whatever, the conversation was boring and going nowhere, so I just let her walk to the bus. Ugh, whatever.

Then, my friends start picking up random chicks on the way. DAMN I can't do that at school for some reasons.
They were much more BAU5 on that than me.
So I did a couple farting pranks on people. It's a good conversation started LOL, and it's incredibly funny. I don't care how immature it is, I like it.
What? The girl I was hanging out 1 on 1 with the other day was in the library too! (let's call her HB queen).
So HB Queen gave me a smile from across the library. Good sign, so I go walk up to her and we talk.
I was in a very good mood because I built social momentum throughout the day. I was talking to everyone!
Me : Hey, do you want to hang out during these holidays?
Her : ...Sure!
She hesitated a bit, but still!
Me : Alright! I'll text you later.
We exchange hugs, I leave and go chill with Porno and Gary again.

There's two girls at the library. I open and talk to them with a big fart.
I never get tired of these pranks LOL. Damn I love life.
We chatted, exchanged names I forgot. Doesn't matter.

Oh, Porno opens this hot girl HB8 with some girl friend!
I actually knew the HB8, so we talked a bit. It kinda got into flirting a little bit. We pretended like we were best friends and we hugged each other a couple of times. I showed her latin dance moves I learned the previous day, so it was a reason to hold hands.
Me : Hey best friend, I forgot your number. What is it again?
Her : Ohhh that was smooth!
It was smooth hahaha. No pickup line intended though, since we were pretending to be best friends even though I only talked to her once or twice.
We exchange hugs again. It's cool. THOUGH Porno got her number too, and I let him call her first for the date. He got it! Got the date! YEAH PORNO!

I was totally in state that day. I have to understand that I must get into that start every day at school.

Thursday, December 13th
I'll write about it tomorrow! Stay tuned. It was an AWESOME day by the way.

 

[LearningSlowly]

200 approaches and still going strong!!

You need to work on kino and body language. Sometimes you use words too much. (Did you know there's two spots on a girls lower back, one on each side. Those spots make girls go wild, you can tell when you find them by reactions. Try that for next night game).

When dealing with a group in night game, touch the group more, in friendly ways. Continue touching your target in sexual ways.

That HB8 num close sounded pro.

 

[Mindgamez]

Yeah man thanks for support!
It was pro, but I totally stopped to text her when Porno had the date. I didn't want to steal his girl.
Good tips. I'll use them for my next night gamin'

Thursday, December 13th
SHAVED MY PUBES, Gave me confidence (for real LOL)
Went to the mall with Porno!

The mall next to my house was cool, because even though it was small, people kept changing and changing every time

As we go in, Porno spots a group of like 5 chicks.
Me : Damn I'm not ready man!
Porno : NO! We have to go man!
After like 1 minute of *****ing out, we finally go. He opened and we talked for a while about random stuff.
I wasn't in the mood since it was the first set of the day.
Actually, they went to my school! Nice, hope I'll see them in the hallways next semester (if I remember their faces..)

So we decided to not count our approaches. It's pointless after all.
We did more than 20 APPROACHES! It's more than I ever done before. It's good, because we gave ourselves less and less excuses.
Lots of rejections, mostly rejections I'd say. I recorded a lot of them, but I'm too lazy to post about all of them.

I note this particular approach. HB8.5
She was sitting on the couch. I walk and go direct. Then, I sit right next to her.
Because I was so genuine and just enjoyed being so attracted to her, my nervousness flew away.
I was too busy enjoying looking into her eyes to worry about being nervous.
She asked me a LOT of questions, did most of the talking. I was surprised by how good it was going. I felt like I didn't care about game. I just wanted to know her better as a person.
I kissed her hand when we exchanged names. She giggled and smiled.
We exchange numbers smoothly and I'm feeling in control.
She tells me that her phone is out of batteries, which seems to be true... is it?
Her parents are there so she has to go. We hug
Me : A little kiss?
Her : No
Me : Haha
She goes back to her parents, and I meetup with Porno again.

We go to the food court, and Porno tells me that I MUST call HB Queen for a date.
So I call her!
Damn, her voice sounded sensual on the phone. I could sense that she was nervous too. Good sign, hehehe.
The talking was flowing and I wasn't feeling that nervous to be honest.
The 20th? Nah, she can't!
Before that, she has exams!
So I fix it to the 28th. A bit far ahead? I know, but I want to spend my time to daygame during Christmas shopping. A LOT of girls everywhere.

Friday, December 14th
Again, I did around 20 approaches AT LEAST.
I was with Porno, Gary and his natural friends. Damn I love their positive and playful vibe!

I noticed one thing during these approaches.
The times I was genuinely attracted to them, it was when it worked the best. Even though I was confident but not as interested, it didn't work as much in my favour.
At first, I wasn't having enough vocal projection and talking softly.

Though, near the end of the day, I literally ran up the stairs and almost yelled to some girls : Oh wait a second! You girls are absolutely gorgeous!
And from here, we had cool conversation.
I had my natural friends with me that just kept cheering me up with every ballsy thing I'd do. Damn I love them.

Basically, I learned to develop a better persistence with the amount of approaches I've done. Surprisingly, I wasn't as much affected by the amount of rejection I was getting. They all had boyfriends too! Damn...

Saturday, December 15th
GAMING ALONE. For real, for the first time. I realized many things.
I was about to do some pranks with my friend from school, and Gary too. BUT we cancelled last minute because Gary couldn't come.

Guess what? It didn't stop me from going out alone.
It took me willpower to get out and decide to travel 1h30 to get there by myself! But I did.

It took me 45 minutes of walking around before finally deciding to approach by myself.

My first approach was on a set of two girls. A bit young, but enough to pump my state up.
Then after my approach, I realized that I had no friends to back me up. Usually, they'd go : So how did it go man? It's alright man, well done. Keep going.
But now, I had no one. And I realized how much of an emotional leech I was to my friends. I used them to pump my mood and couldn't do it as well by myself.
After this approach, I started getting the ball rolled, slowly but I did.

I missed SO many golden opportunities. The girl was an 8.5, but I was too shy to go. When alone, I feel like the world is against me since I have no friends to back me up. I also realized that my voice got softer because I was afraid of being heard. It's a different experience, but it is good to realize it.

I did one to some asian chick walking by herself.
I noticed how genuine I was. Since I'm not doing this to impress anyone or as a *dare* mindset, it feels so much more real. It feels more personal and you feel free of time. You don't feel like you have to catch up your friend afterwards, and you can converse for how long you want.
I told her that I had to meetup with a friend in an hour or so and that I was just chilling around. She asked me where I was going, etc, and she seemed down for us to chill together.
Her : Ohh well I gotta pass by X shop. I don't know about you, about where you're going and stuff.
Me : Ohhh okay
WHY did I say okay? I have to say : Yeah let's chill! And I gotta go to Z, come with me.
But yeah, we just headed separate ways instead.

I kept walking around and around.
Once, I let some beautiful girl pass by, but decided to run back to her.
By listening back to the audio, I realized the neediness in my voice. It didn't matter, because I now know!

Two asian chicks! They were hot.
I also ran up to them. Started a conversation, but didn't close the deal on that one and didn't really escalate the conversation.
We exchange goodbyes after a minute or two. I hug them too.

HAWT HB8.5 asian
I didn't plan on approaching her at first, but she approached me with some discount ticket.
I felt in control and confident on this one.
Me : What is this?
Her : It's some discount blablabla.
Me : I don't want this, but what I do want is your number!
She giggles, the fun starts.
Her : I'm sorry, I can't give out my number while working...
Me : Well let's do it light speed before the boss comes!
Blablabla, it's fun. We exchange names too.
Me : So how old are you?
Her : I'm 19.
Me : Niice niice... guess my age.
Her : Mhmhmh I don't know, blablabla.
Me : Don't worry, I'm okay. You won't be accused of paedophilia!
More laughs. I try once more for the number, but she tells me that she has a boyfriend.
DAMN they all have boyfriends!
So I exchange hugs and I go back to the metro, feeling confident and calm.

I did one more back home, for a total of 6 approaches today.
I saw her, and I knew that the right thing to do was to GO IN. I didn't think more than a couple seconds.
It was direct, and the girl's face lit up like she was impressed. She giggled a bit, but then I founded myself having trouble with my words and stumble upon them a bit.
I was nervous, by myself, and I know what's the feeling now.

Surprisingly, no harsh rejections! Maybe was it because I only did 6 approaches?

CONCLUSION
- GET THE PERSISTENCE GOING! If you usually can do 10 approaches, well the truth is that you can do up to 20 and more. You're just giving yourself excuses. Oh, and it's not only the quantity, but the quality that matters.
- Be genuinely attracted to the girl. Even though you're confident, if you don't find her particularly attractive, she will sense that something's not quite right. Of course, don,t take this as an excuse not to approach, but I'm just saying!
- CALL THE GIRL! Just do it. Talk about whatever you want to talk to. Make it playful. Notice her sweet voice and imagine her smiling and laughing behind the phone. She might be nervous too! Tease her about her voice, etc.
- GO OUT ALONE. It will be much harder, but you learn much more. You might have troubles staying focused since you don't have a wing to constantly remind you to approach. But the biggest part is confidence and becoming independent. You then realize how much of an emotional leech you were to your friends! You learn to get yourself into the mood. Trust me : If you can do it alone, you will have no troubles doing it with friends.

 

[Nino-Tk]

I like your point about going out alone, I want to do that more often, its more challenging but higher risk equals higher reward. Thanks for reminding me about that. Good job my brother!

 

[Nite]

Alone, huh? Err... well... I'll think about it.
Nice job going out by yourself

 

[Mindgamez]

Thanks for support guys, I needed it

I think I gamed more than that, but I can't quite remember all of them. I gamed the 18th, somewhere before that too I think. As usual. It became a routine. We get rejections mostly, but we learn a lot.
82 days no fap, but failed recently... Back to day 2

Friday, December 21st
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ShVQiPmEfA

12:20 AM
The end.
I walked back home in peace. I took my time and made sure to keep my mind silent.
There was something so calming and relieving about the snowstorm and the cold. It wasn't too cold, but it was just cold enough to feel it on your skin.
Snow symbolizes a new beginning, the end of a cycle.
I didn't care the rain and the snow falling on my face. It felt refreshing.
The world could end right now at this very moment, and I'd be totally fine.
I realized how death is so important. Because time passes by so fast, it is important to enjoy every second of life. I might die today, but that would be totally fine.
I don't need outside accomplishments to feel like I am fulfilled. I make the internal change, and the results will happen by themselves. But for real, there is no meaning in all of this. I do all of this to die.
But I will continue on until the end.
I am not scared of death anymore.

I stopped in front of my garage and contemplated the orange light lighting the contours of the tree.
Animals and nature don't feel time. All they know is the now. It is what exists and the only thing that will ever exist.
I walked back under the snowstorm. It was now rain, but it didn't matter.
I lifted my hood and enjoyed the cold rain on my face, like it was a cleansing shower.
The end, I thought.

2:15 AM
I take out a peace of paper and write on it.
The End.
Surrender to what is;
take right action;
live like there is no tomorrow.

Signed my name
I put it back in my book The Power of Now as a bookmark.

3:00 AM
I couldn't sleep. I was overthinking, but I didn't mind. It knew it would stop soon.

12:30 PM
I woke up late, but I really had to sleep. Lack of sleep is always killing me!
I still knew I wanted to game with Porno. We went to go buy condoms and then went downtown to where we always game.

I made Porno listen to one of Simple Pickup's podcast on Godmode.
I remember doing this approach where I just allowed myself to be nervous and assumed that it would be cute. It ended up pretty good since she was the one asking me questions, etc. Though, I wasn't as confident when came time for the number. The problem is that I should have stayed instead. The number is a reason to eject when I have nothing else to say.
We decided to play the 30 seconds game!
EVERY 30 seconds, we HAD to talk to at least one person. It didn't matter who it was, we had to. We asked where the lingerie shop was, we did some crazy stuff and made sure to reduce lag time between each interaction by approaching CONSTANTLY.
At some point, we reached a point of I don't give a **** and I just stopped to give myself excuses almost completely. It felt amazing!

NIGHTGAME
We were ready for it. All this non-stop approaching daygame put us in a good mood.
I chilled at my Romanian friend's place for an hour or so before going to the party. I lost my social mode and was nervous again when we went out!
We arrived at the party, and I'm immediately feeling more nervous as I see people from my high school. It was a college party right next to my old high school.
When I enter in, I notice how everyone's a bit awkward and not into the partying mood yet. The guys are in their spot, the girls are in the other spot.
I remember Porno and me *****ing out for like 30-45 minutes before we FINALLY decided to approach.
Even my old chode(though nice) friends from high school were encouraging me to approach! Everyone was with me. For some reason, I wasn't comfortable with environments that recalled my past.
Damn, what if I don't approach of the night at all? NO, there's a lot of people I don't know! COME ON.
We walked around the place and opened a couple of girls here and there.

I opened this set of 2 girls, twins!
I talked to the cute one HB8.5 and we flirted a bit, close proximity. We talk, she has a bright smile and it's going good.
I tell her that we should go on the dance floor and dance, but she says no with the smile. Her friends were pulling her somewhere so I let her go.
Why take it as a failure? Nobody was dancing anyway and the party didn't really start yet!

Later, I talk to her again, get really close and go physical by touching her arm in obvious ways. I touched her face a bit too.
SHE ASKED FOR MY NUMBER, and what do I do?
Me : Oh what? Already? Wait, let's go dance. Blablabla
I talk a bit more, get closer and lean in for the kiss. She smiles again.
Her : Haha nooo!
Me : Don't worry, nobody's watching you, your friends ain't around!
We talk a bit more, I'm stupid enough not to take her number. Since she refused the kiss, I saw it as a fail but it really wasn't. I simply had to make her feel comfortable enough and secure for the kiss and I was escalating quickly. Guess what? She goes see her friends.
After I saw Julien's video about how the first 2 hours or so are for getting numbers and just getting into the mood, I realized that I made a mistake here. But I know from now on.

3rd time, I see her looking at me. I quickly look away(FCK I always do that), then look again. She was smiling, waiting for me to approach.
Guess what? I waited WAY too long before reapproaching.
Then I told her that we should dance, but I lost my state because I put too much importance on that approach. I wanted it to work. Guess what? It didn't work, she left the club completely.

 

[Mindgamez]

In the meantime while I was away from that beautiful girl, I talked to other chicks.

Me : Oh Porno, go talk to her! She's ALONE on the couch, super hot and bored!
Porno : Ahhh nah, you go for it man!
Me : Alright...
It took me time to muster up the courage to go talk to her, but I finally did.
She seemed bored out of her mind, but I wasn't sucked into her negativity. She was rambling about bull**** and how her friends ditched her and she was alone.
I kept talking, started to flirt a bit and a girl I though I couldn't make smile actually smiled and giggled.
The initial reaction doesn't mean anything! The opener isn't the most important.
So I went obviously physical here, wrapping my arm around. Kept talking, almost went in for the kiss but she backed off with a smile.
Her : Hahaha, no I know what you're going to do!
So yeah, I manage to kiss her on the cheek before leaving.
Guess what? I actually kind of got ****blocked by those guys that were amazed by my luminescent shirt. They liked my dancing from earlier and asked me to go dance again. Since the girl wasn't down for dancing, I left her and went on the dancefloor.
I should have stayed, but I left to show her that I am not needy. No, I have to persist. When I worry about seeming needy, I'm probably a bit needy.
Later, I see her between two guys. I muster up the courage to reapproach, but when I do, she sits on then and looks at me with a smile that means : Too bad for you!
So I left hahah... whatever.

I can flirt with the exact same girls the douchebags always get and get away with it. A higher status or better looking guy doesn't necessarily have more confidence or skill.

So I go in to that girl HB8.5, super hot, she was in a group.
My friends were watching, and weirdly it gave me confidence instead of feeling self-conscious about how I did. Like I had something to show them to impress them, but I know that's not the right mindset.
Anyway, it still went pretty cool.
Went physical right at the start! I introduce myself, kiss her hand, spin her around and catch her back with my arm. I spilled a bit of her beer and she laughed a bit. She seemed attracted at first, but for some reason her friend went running away because distracted, and the girl I was talking to also left... Whatever. I lost her in the crowd.

Let's not forget Prom Girl (Remember her?)
She was getting very touchy with me, getting close and she seemed pretty down for the kiss. She looked kinda hot that day, but for some reasons I wasn't super down for her. I still asked her if she wanted a kiss, she said no X).

I flirted with a BUNCH of other chicks I forgot.
I could say literally almost every hot chick in the place. They were receptive at first, but I started to lose my cool after I realized how many golden opportunities I missed : The 1st girl asking for my number, that girl I kissed on the cheek, that girl I spinned and didn't persist.
I grinded some for a little while, resting my hands on her hips, but after a couple seconds she looked at me saying : Whoaa! Smiled a bit and left.

I lost my mood more and more as the night went on.
I sat there with Porno and we didn't feel like dancing or anything. My stomach was hurting pretty bad, stomach problems like usual...

The walk back to Ioan's place
Porno : Ahhh damn I sucked today! We could've done so much more!
Me : I know. I was going good at first but started to get rejected so much more and lost my state.
Porno : Don't worry man it's part of the game.
Me : You're absolutely right man. We must not be influenced by our external results, but be motivated by our internal changes.
I felt great anyway. I was good, and I know that I will succeed.

Monday, December 24th
Texted HB Queen. It was going great and she was definitely attracted!
Though, from trying too much to flirt by text, she stopped responding. Trying too hard isn't good. I got the date, I gotta chillax man! Maybe she won't meet up because I was acting a bit needy here.
It doesn't matter.
I am abundant.

Watched Julien's 1h30 video. It explained everything about nightgame, and things started to click as I realized the mistakes I did last nightgame.
I know the answer! And I am confident.
I took 3 pages of notes about his video. Very useful advice.

Today,
Started implementing new habits.
Exercise, Stretch, Meditate, Piano, Manage money, Write, Nutrition and drinking enough water, Social, Cleaning room and organising, Working on project (usually short films), No Fap, Working on posture, Taking care of my appearance, Reading, Planning the next day, and getting plenty of sleep and waking up at a reasonable time.
I WILL implement these habits every day. I will be persistent and do everything I have to do. I must be proactive, take action in EVERY aspect of my life. It's not only about ****ing girls.
I have a life ahead. There's no way I ain't living life to the fullest.
There's no way I'm slacking off and not taking action.
There's no way I'm ever giving up.
The learning curve is long, it takes time. I will persist.
I will keep this motivation no matter what.
This means training my WILLPOWER.

I'm ending 2012 right.
I know, maybe I won't achieve my new year's resolutions. But those resolutions were based on external results, and it's not about external results.
And I will not sink down into unhappiness because I didn't have the opportunity to get laid. Or maybe I will? I still got 5 days left.
I can't wait for 2013, a brand new start. Even better than 2012.
I promise myself to become the best man I can be.

Conclusion
- Don't ever, ever, ever get discouraged. The learning curve is LONG and HUGE.
- The initial rejection or reaction doesn't mean anything. The beginning of the night, she might not feel in the mood, not energetic yet. It's fine, boost up your own mood. You want to experience other girls, and she wants to experience other guys. That is totally normal.
- Do not expect the world to give you anything. If it does give you something, that's great. But true happiness comes from within, true peace. Peace is the best feeling in the world, because it leads to happiness. But short term happiness doesn't necessarily give you peace. Be relaxed.
- Go physical guys! Get the reference so it becomes normal.
- Improve every aspect of your life, not just pick up. Get into good habits, find your passions in life, etc.

 

[Mindgamez]

Had a talk with Mail on facebook.
Had like a huge ass epiphany and I feel... enlightened. I feel like the game is actually nothing.

The game is about learning and discovering that there is absolutely nothing to learn about it.

We're getting to the core.
The problem we encounter us *pickup* guys is that we're good at approaching and working on things to say, how to say, etc, but we forget the *Building a human connection* part. As *pickup* guys, we see the building a human connection part as a big thing.

How do you learn to enjoy talking to a hot girl and flirt with her? You just do!

And we get so caught up in bulding confidence, pushing comfort zone
Which is not a bad thing, but we have to calm down at some point and just enjoy.

And I don't realize how much I forget about that sometimes.
Girls become tools to self development. They don't become people. That's why I can have a hard time connecting with a girl. I'm too caught up with the *I have to become better at game!* aspect, when actually I should simply go with the flow, allow the moment to be and not resist it.

What should the game be? Simple. It's about getting to know someone and being genuinely interested, enjoying their presence, sharing love. So genuinely interested that we forget about actually becoming good at it. Paradoxically, this is what makes us so good. We are so afraid to fall in love when in reality it could only benefit us. We are afraid of becoming needy, of being outcome dependent.
I remember so many sets where I was so much better because I simply allowed myself to momentarily fall in love with some girl. I didn't care about game at that point.

If you care too much about the self development side, you WILL become some kind of approach social machine.
Which is what I became for a while... I was talking to people not because I felt like it but because I just wanted to get into the talkative mood. I don't realize that I do that because I actually enjoy it, and I don't do it because I want to become good at it.
Eventually, by realizing this, we become so much better.

Even though you have the best confidence, if you aren't letting go of the *game* to actually let yourself become immersed and interested, it won't work. Sometimes, just allowing yourself to be vulnerable to the world and to whatever is what makes you so good.

I so clearly remember those sets when I was less confident but just allowed myself to feel insanely attracted. The girl responded so much better, even though I kept laughing of nervousness. Eventually, confidence came right after.

It's SO weird for us to say that this is hard to apply, since it's exactly like teaching someone how to like the opposite sex.

YOU JUST DO. You can't learn something you already have within your DNA. There's nothing we have to learn.

There's NOTHING we have to learn.

It's like you're holding a pencil in your hand and you want to drop it, and you ask some guru how to let go of the pen.
YOU JUST DO.

The game is about learning and discovering that there is absolutely nothing to learn about it. You know it all. There is no reason why you're not enough.


THE END.

What's coming up next
I'm going on a date tomorrow with HB Queen. She's a 7, 7.5, but that's totally fine.
I'll just enjoy her presence, she'll enjoy mine.
I will allow myself to live. How is it so hard? I know everything, since it's in my DNA.

Texted her and called her in the past. She was responsive and on the phone I simply allowed myself to be myself and said the most random stuff I though was pretty funny, telling her that I'll bring her on an adventure where we'll rape dogs and kill cats. She agreed LOL.

 

[LearningSlowly]

Date advice: be physical from the start. Your first move should be brushing against her in a way she can't ignore. From there keep touching as long as she's receptive. Private touching is always better than public touching.

Get the kiss as early as possible. Halfway through the date I start looking for it, do not wait til the end for the kiss attempt.

Use intuition over thought. All of your pick up skills are internalized by now, they require no thought to implement. Do what you do best.