It Is Easy For Most Women To Move On

[BaronOfHair]

It's why I practice stoicism, because it brings me peace when I expect the unexpected; nothing truly surprises me anymore

Any day I could get fired
Any day someone I love could die
Any day there could be a natural disaster
Any day I could find out my spouse is cheating or leaving

It forces me to be completely unattached, but at the same time everything is more beautiful because of it. Mundane moments turn into future memories.

This isn't unique to Stoicism either. Many(if not most of)the most spectacular philosophical traditions encourage us to not get overly attached to anything. Why? Because everything is impermanent and in constant flux, Aeon or otherwise

 

[BaronOfHair]

Talk about it with other men? Fuhgeddaboutit. Sharing feelings with other men? They will call you a homo and ostracise you

Yeah, it's far more beneficial to remind the ailing man that his emotions are just the byproduct of his(distorted and hyperbolic)thoughts and beliefs regarding the event in question... We all have near-absolute power over how much and sort of pain we experience

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Yeah, it's far more beneficial to remind the ailing man that his emotions are just the byproduct of his(distorted and hyperbolic)thoughts and beliefs regarding the event in question... We all have near-absolute power over how much and sort of pain we experience

There's a huge cultural aspect that cannot be avoided, which started in my time when women complained about guys not showing their feelings enough. I had an excuse*, but many guys turned into crybabies, who in turn of course couldn't get laid anymore.

And why? Because women didn't wanted guys who showed their feelings. They wanted guys to care about women's feelings. And in their distorted logic, they thought "if men would cry, they'd understand how to deal with us when we cry". Which, of course, is nonsense.

A man's primal reaction to a woman crying should be to put his arms around her to comfort her, not to stand there like he caused her problems and cry blobby tears with her.

Women on the other hand realised they were wrong about asking men to cry like women, but it did sort out the weak 'pleasers' from the more stoic mature men who would disregard their requests and just made women feel safe to express their emotions without becoming a blubbering mess.


"Please, Mister, can you help me find my lost buttplug?"

*I told girlfriends who complained about my stoicism/non-reactiveness that I was raised in a dysfunctional family (true, but it also made sure my girlfriends did not want to 'meet my parents') and had developed Delayed Emotional Display from hiding my fear from my parents and siblings. Like I told them 'I do my crying and screaming on the inside'.

 

[New_Journey]

A man's primal reaction to a woman crying should be to put his arms around her to comfort her

That can be easily weaponized against men, its called Weaponizing men's protecting instinct, that's one think that fvcks men up, they see her crying and they cater to her wimp. Its primal, women don't need protection any more.

 

[BaronOfHair]

There's a huge cultural aspect that cannot be avoided, which started in my time when women complained about guys not showing their feelings enough. I had an excuse*, but many guys turned into crybabies, who in turn of course couldn't get laid anymore.

The legacy of 60s counterculture

hasn't quite left us

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

That can be easily weaponized against men, its called Weaponizing men's protecting instinct, that's one think that fvcks men up, they see her crying and they cater to her wimp. Its primal, women don't need protection any more.

Can you step out of your self-victimising mindset?

Knowledge is power. Self-knowledge is strength. Since I know the primal male urge to protect the 'damsel in distress', I'm quite able to see when a person tries to manipulate me. I study people all the time, which is why I'm both resistant to manipulation and able to manipulate the manipulators.
If a woman manipulates a man, it's because he's too dense to understand the manipulation game and how to defend himself. This is the way of the world - it's much better to hold the reins than to wear the bridle.