Initiating female contact as a male gender role is not as bad as it seems

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

the game isn't fair, never has been and never will be, hence why its like this and probably always will be.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

the game isn't fair, never has been and never will be, hence why its like this and probably always will be.

Fairness is an ideal that can never be attained, but it's noble to strive for an ideal.
Expecting anything to be fair is delusional.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I think I've mentioned on this forum that the mere thought of asking a woman out is enough to make my heart start pounding a mile a minute.

Additionally, when it comes to asking a woman out, I'm prone to getting so nervous I can barely get any words to come out of my mo

What sane woman, even if she's physically attracted to the guy, is going to accept his advances if he's exhibiting these behaviors? It's no wonder the only time an in-person ask out ever worked for me was with that super strange college classmate I mentioned (the one who carried around a blanket and a stuffed animal).

As for the gay guys I've gotten attention from, no, none have been coworkers. I used to work near a gay night club. As a result, I ended up crossing paths with a lot of gay guys as they were heading to/coming from the night club (some of which expressed interest in me). One gay guy lives in my building (and some of the gay guys I've gotten attention from have been characters I've run into on a regular basis in my neighborhood, even though they don't live in my building)

Alot of us men complain that it stinks that the man has to initiate everything (e.g. the approach, setting up the date, etc.)

However, at least we are in control and can pick and choose which women we want to talk to.

Imagine how frustrating it is for a woman who is trying to get the attention of a man she finds attractive hoping he will approach. Not to mention, getting approached by men who you gave zero IOI's to.

"Did he not notice that I gave him a slight smile as I walked by? Maybe I should of smiled bigger? Maybe I should of looked over more? Maybe I should of locked eyes with him longer, etc. etc. Of course, woman can approach men and initiate contact, but very few women will and frankly I think most men are turned off by it.

Women might have it easier in the amount of attention they get from the opposite sex, but at least we are in control of who we want to approach.

As we've discussed elsewhere on this forum: Even women have to learn the nuances of attraction. We're kidding ourselves if we believe Sydney Sweeney became The It Girl of The 2020s by sheer luck alone Vs Putting copious efforts into activities like keeping her body fit enough to look like this https://www.themirror.com/entertainment/celebrity-news/sydney-sweeney-bikini-body-thong-530463.amp , even when she's not on set. And learning everything she can about sharpening her appeal and charisma, so as to stand out from the other billion starlets she's competing with

We humans(regardless of gender) have a decision to make, each and every day we're alive:

-Set viable and pragmatically achievable goals, craft viable strategies for achieving said goals, then executing those strategies

-Take what APPEARS, at first glance, to be the easy route: Binge watch sh-tloads of YouTube, play lots of Fortnite, live off Twinkies, and grouse over how life SHOULD operate

 

[GoodMan32]

As we've discussed elsewhere on this forum: Even women have to learn the nuances of attraction. We're kidding ourselves if we believe Sydney Sweeney became The It Girl of The 2020s by sheer luck alone Vs Putting copious efforts into activities like keeping her body fit enough to look like this https://www.themirror.com/entertainment/celebrity-news/sydney-sweeney-bikini-body-thong-530463.amp , even when she's not on set. And learning everything she can about sharpening her appeal and charisma, so as to stand out from the other billion starlets she's competing with

We humans(regardless of gender) have a decision to make, each and every day we're alive:

-Set viable and pragmatically achievable goals, craft viable strategies for achieving said goals, then executing those strategies

-Take what APPEARS, at first glance, to be the easy route: Binge watch sh-tloads of YouTube, play lots of Fortnite, live off Twinkies, and grouse over how life SHOULD operate

It's one thing for a man to overcome garden variety nervousness.

But for a man to be as extreme as me (heart pounding a mile a minute, so choked up I can barely speak, so shaky I could fall over at any second), what hope is there of fixing that?

 

[BaronOfHair]

But for a man to be as extreme as me (heart pounding a mile a minute, so choked up I can barely speak, so shaky I could fall over at any second), what hope is there of fixing that?

Quite a lot, if you start listening to that audiobook

, and applying what you've learned, rather than desperately concocting rationalizations for going on the way you have. I don't pretend that this will be easy, nonetheless the way forward is really quite simple

 

[corrector]

But for a man to be as extreme as me (heart pounding a mile a minute, so choked up I can barely speak, so shaky I could fall over at any second), what hope is there of fixing that?

You don't just have to deal with your crush. Try someone you are not infatuated with.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

But for a man to be as extreme as me (heart pounding a mile a minute, so choked up I can barely speak, so shaky I could fall over at any second), what hope is there of fixing that?

Come clean with your shrink and let him help you overcome your crippling anxiety. Don't look for a solution here, most of these people are in dire need of therapy themselves.

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

Fairness is an ideal that can never be attained, but it's noble to strive for an ideal.
Expecting anything to be fair is delusional.

yup, understatement, the game is the way its always been and probably always will be

 

[BaronOfHair]

yup, understatement, the game is the way its always been and probably always will be

We can only assume that this is what both Red Pillers and Intersectionalists alike mean, when they start blubbering about "Gynocentrism" and "Patriarchy", respectively. That double standards exist for men and women alike, and that are flaws in society which disproportionately affect one gender more than another

All true enough, nonetheless this raises questions such as:

-"What do we do to rectify these things?"

-"Is it humanly possible to vanquish them once and for all?"

-"Isn't simply reducing disparities between to the sexes, to the degree that this is humanly possible, enough?"

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

We can only assume that this is what both Red Pillers and Intersectionalists alike mean, when they start blubbering about "Gynocentrism" and "Patriarchy", respectively. That double standards exist for men and women alike, and that are flaws in society which disproportionately affect one gender more than another

All true enough, nonetheless this raises questions such as:

-"What do we do to rectify these things?"

-"Is it humanly possible to vanquish them once and for all?"

-"Isn't simply reducing disparities between to the sexes, to the degree that this is humanly possible, enough?"

yeah, i've heard some say, the game is designed to keep men single alone by default, but for women to by default always have options and choices, always have suitors, when i say designed to keep men alone, single by default, well, obviously, because normally men don't have women making passes at them.

 

[BaronOfHair]

yeah, i've heard some say, the game is designed to keep men single alone by default....

And whenever we ask The Ayatollahs Of Red Pill Theology "Who specifically designed The Game?", "What do you even mean by game?", or/and "What evidence are you basing your assertions on?", we treated to non-responsives replies, or answers grounded in half-truths


"....but for women to by default always have options and choices"

As we've discussed earlier https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...as-bad-as-it-seems.282323/page-3#post-3121147 , even attractive women have to learn the nuances of what draws the sexes together. And women's options tend to drop off sharply, once they're into their 3rd decades of life https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...in-the-dating-game.281720/page-5#post-3116965




"....well, obviously, because normally men don't have women making passes at them"

Brings us back around to a topic we've been discussing here https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/looksmaxxing-goes-mainstream.282162/ Many men TODAY don't have chicks hitting on them, thanks in no small part to the fact that things which were self-evident to men in the not-too-distant past (Maintain yourself with physical exercise, clear up facial acne, keep your hair well-groomed, wear clothes that befit a man, instead of looking like a child, etc)now being scoffed at as "Looksmaxxing" or "Promoting tradcon values". When so many of us mistake looking and speaking like THIS https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.mi...cs/ukip-rape-joke-candidate-carl-16170201.amp or this https://www.patreon.com/doctor for "being authentic", it's no surprise that so few men today have experiences like this

on even an occasional basis

 

[Hamurabimbi]

And whenever we ask The Ayatollahs Of Red Pill Theology "Who specifically designed The Game?", "What do you even mean by game?", or/and "What evidence are you basing your assertions on?", we treated to non-responsives replies, or answers grounded in half-truths


"....but for women to by default always have options and choices"

As we've discussed earlier https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...as-bad-as-it-seems.282323/page-3#post-3121147 , even attractive women have to learn the nuances of what draws the sexes together. And women's options tend to drop off sharply, once they're into their 3rd decades of life https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...in-the-dating-game.281720/page-5#post-3116965




"....well, obviously, because normally men don't have women making passes at them"

Brings us back around to a topic we've been discussing here https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/looksmaxxing-goes-mainstream.282162/ Many men TODAY don't have chicks hitting on them, thanks in no small part to the fact that things which were self-evident to men in the not-too-distant past (Maintain yourself with physical exercise, clear up facial acne, keep your hair well-groomed, wear clothes that befit a man, instead of looking like a child, etc)now being scoffed at as "Looksmaxxing" or "Promoting tradcon values". When so many of us mistake looking and speaking like THIS https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.mi...cs/ukip-rape-joke-candidate-carl-16170201.amp or this https://www.patreon.com/doctor for "being authentic", it's no surprise that so few men today have experiences like this

on even an occasional basis

That was subtle. This is more appropriate:

 

[BaronOfHair]

That was subtle. This is more appropriate:

Yeah... Those who want to be appealing to not just the opposite sex, but the rest of humanity more generally, have to look and act the part of an attractive person. This is true for men AND women alike. Sydney Sweeney wouldn't have become this decade's It Girl, if she looked, spoke, and acted like this

Lizzo Calls Herself a 'Roll Model' as She Shares Sexy Beachside Bikini Photos

The "Truth Hurts" singer rocked an orange two-piece as she hit the beach in Brazil

people.com

Instead of

For Actress Sydney Sweeney, Sexiness "Isn't One-Dimensional"

The Euphoria star models Parade's latest silky mesh collection, becoming the first celebrity face of the buzzy lingerie brand.

www.harpersbazaar.com

MGTOWs, MGTOW lites, and self-described Incels are little more than male equivalents of Chantty Binx https://m.imdb.com/title/tt7208418/mediaviewer/rm3370787328/ Who experience a meltdown at their fellow women reading books like The Rules, then find it shocking that everyone from servers at Long Horn to probate court judges don't receive them especially warmly

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

And whenever we ask The Ayatollahs Of Red Pill Theology "Who specifically designed The Game?", "What do you even mean by game?", or/and "What evidence are you basing your assertions on?", we treated to non-responsives replies, or answers grounded in half-truths


"....but for women to by default always have options and choices"

As we've discussed earlier https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...as-bad-as-it-seems.282323/page-3#post-3121147 , even attractive women have to learn the nuances of what draws the sexes together. And women's options tend to drop off sharply, once they're into their 3rd decades of life https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...in-the-dating-game.281720/page-5#post-3116965




"....well, obviously, because normally men don't have women making passes at them"

Brings us back around to a topic we've been discussing here https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/looksmaxxing-goes-mainstream.282162/ Many men TODAY don't have chicks hitting on them, thanks in no small part to the fact that things which were self-evident to men in the not-too-distant past (Maintain yourself with physical exercise, clear up facial acne, keep your hair well-groomed, wear clothes that befit a man, instead of looking like a child, etc)now being scoffed at as "Looksmaxxing" or "Promoting tradcon values". When so many of us mistake looking and speaking like THIS https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.mi...cs/ukip-rape-joke-candidate-carl-16170201.amp or this https://www.patreon.com/doctor for "being authentic", it's no surprise that so few men today have experiences like this

on even an occasional basis

well i'm saying that because, for all time, the way it has always been, is that, women, even if they like a man, are attracted to a certain guy, they still 99 percent of the time will never shoot their shot with him

 

[GoodMan32]

Yeah... Those who want to be appealing to not just the opposite sex, but the rest of humanity more generally, have to look and act the part of an attractive person. This is true for men AND women alike. Sydney Sweeney wouldn't have become this decade's It Girl, if she looked, spoke, and acted like this

Lizzo Calls Herself a 'Roll Model' as She Shares Sexy Beachside Bikini Photos

The "Truth Hurts" singer rocked an orange two-piece as she hit the beach in Brazil

people.com

Instead of

For Actress Sydney Sweeney, Sexiness "Isn't One-Dimensional"

The Euphoria star models Parade's latest silky mesh collection, becoming the first celebrity face of the buzzy lingerie brand.

www.harpersbazaar.com

MGTOWs, MGTOW lites, and self-described Incels are little more than male equivalents of Chantty Binx https://m.imdb.com/title/tt7208418/mediaviewer/rm3370787328/ Who experience a meltdown at their fellow women reading books like The Rules, then find it shocking that everyone from servers at Long Horn to probate court judges don't receive them especially warmly

I've been told I resemble Jared Kushner, Steve from Blue's Clues, and Sheldon from Big Bang Theory. In other words, I don't look like a slob.

 

[BaronOfHair]

I've been told I resemble Jared Kushner, Steve from Blue's Clues, and Sheldon from Big Bang Theory

Looks are only half the battle. Zendaya wouldn't be the wet dream of every heterosexual male on the planet, if she looked had a mouth that could easily masquerade as a landfill, ala. Leslie Jones

 

[BaronOfHair]

Fairness is an ideal that can never be attained, but it's noble to strive for an ideal.
Expecting anything to be fair is delusional.

There actually is a twisted fairness to the fact that life is unfair to EVERYONE sometimes

 

[Hamurabimbi]

well i'm saying that because, for all time, the way it has always been, is that, women, even if they like a man, are attracted to a certain guy, they still 99 percent of the time will never shoot their shot with him

It’s uncommon. But not THAT rare.

 

[Salvation]

Nah, imo girls have the ultimate power if sex happens or not. It's not 'also difficult' for them, they are just very stupid about it if they think they have a problem in that department. As an average woman you literally just look at a guy consequently. And react positively to his advances. If you wanna go 'advanced' you can ask him some random question like 'do you know how long this place is open'.
Or you go on tinder and as an average woman still have eg 2000 likes (like a female co-worker of mine, which is like a 5).

Woman have different problems. Like hardly being attracted to anyone. Like feeling afraid when they walk home alone. Like getting the Chad to commit. But getting sex is just not one of the problems.

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

Nah, imo girls have the ultimate power if sex happens or not. It's not 'also difficult' for them, they are just very stupid about it if they think they have a problem in that department. As an average woman you literally just look at a guy consequently. And react positively to his advances. If you wanna go 'advanced' you can ask him some random question like 'do you know how long this place is open'.
Or you go on tinder and as an average woman still have eg 2000 likes (like a female co-worker of mine, which is like a 5).

Woman have different problems. Like hardly being attracted to anyone. Like feeling afraid when they walk home alone. Like getting the Chad to commit. But getting sex is just not one of the problems.

In your last sentence, that sums it up perfect, would also include, having dating options or getting attention from men, having offers, is never an issue or problem for them, they always have that by default, thats the luxury of being on the receiving end of sexual attention.

Men are naturally in scarcity, Women are naturally in abundance, even lots of mens dating coaches say that.