Impressing a woman with an outfit

[BackInTheGame78]

Supposedly some people are born the wrong gender.

I certainly don't feel like I was supposed to be born female. But the fact I have female proportions, combined with the fact I want to be approached by a potential partner (as opposed to doing the approaching) is some food for thought. Perhaps I really was born the wrong gender.



I have responded to the solutions.

As for my coworker, he's relevant because, as I said, perhaps he knows a secret to getting a woman out of your league. I shared the story because perhaps a poster knows the secret too.

Dude that is irrelevant.

You can use that as an excuse to do absolutely nothing, which is what you seem to be best at going back many threads, or you can work on it and improve it.

You might never get to the point of being jacked but you can look 50x better than right now dressed and 100x better without a shirt on.

I'm guessing you'll do nothing because that would actually take hard work and effort.

 

[plumber]

Dude that is irrelevant.

You can use that as an excuse to do absolutely nothing, which is what you seem to be best at going back many threads, or you can work on it and improve it.

You might never get to the point of being jacked but you can look 50x better than right now dressed and 100x better without a shirt on.

I'm guessing you'll do nothing because that would actually take hard work and effort.

OP; this post is really solid advice. If you can not do this, tell why. Otherwise share your plan for how you are going to do it. Lots of men in this forum that can give useful advice on how to do it. You are not the first guy that had to fix his body...

This is the easiest thing that you can do that will have predictable results. Today is the best day to start.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Supposedly some people are born the wrong gender.

I certainly don't feel like I was supposed to be born female. But the fact I have female proportions, combined with the fact I want to be approached by a potential partner (as opposed to doing the approaching) is some food for thought. Perhaps I really was born the wrong gender.

No, you’re not a tranny. Just someone who’s too lazy to work out, too timid too approach women and too eager to make excuses.

I mean, give me a fvcking break. You really think that you were born the wrong gender because you’d rather have women approach you? lol. If it was up them, all men would rather be approached by women. If it was up to me, I’d sit on a golden throne and have women lining up about the block for a chance to throw themselves at me. And I’m quite confident that I wasn’t born the wrong gender.

Men approach women not because they like putting themselves out there and facing rejection but because they know that if they don’t, nothing will happen. That’s all there is to it.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

At the end of the day OP, your mindset is all wrong to begin with.

You shouldn't be worried about impressing a woman, THEY should be worried about impressing YOU.

I've worn basketball shorts, a tank top and a backwards baseball hat to first dates before.

You think I gave a damn whether they would be impressed or not? It was hot out and we were doing an activity date, I was dreasing comfortably and they could kick rocks if they didn't like it.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

1. Pushups. No excuse about the gym. You do 100 to 200 push ups a day (work up to it) your upper body will develop.

2. Less carbs (way less) more protien in your diet.

3. Quit buying shirts at Walmart. It says cheap and frumpy. Not sexy.

4. No plaid shirts. Plaids are hard to pull off for the fashion impaired. Better to avoid.

5. Robert Graham shirts

6. Allen Edmonds brogues (shoes).

Push ups. Yesterday. Now. Until further notice.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Advice from the old lady:

1. Pushups. No excuse about the gym. You do 100 to 200 push ups a day (work up to it) your upper body will develop.

2. Less carbs (way less) more protien in your diet.

3. Quit buying shirts at Walmart. It says cheap and frumpy. Not sexy.

4. No plaid shirts. Plaids are hard to pull off for the fashion impaired. Better to avoid.

5. Robert Graham shirts

6. Allen Edmonds brogues (shoes).

Push ups. Yesterday. Now. Until further notice.

Pushups are an easy way to get the entire body done in one exercise, I would agree. He should pyramid them. 10-20-30-40-50-40-30-20-10 or smaller increments if needed. Do them at the office it’s a chip shot. 60 seconds in between sets he will be done in 10-20 minutes.

He should immediately wear tighter more athletic clothing, but when the physique comes around a little, he will start getting told he looks good and it will push him further.

Should take maybe 4-6 weeks at the most if this is done on a daily basis.

Also, stop eating like a gavoon, and take 5g daily of creatine, 5,000- 10,000 iu daily of d3 and k2 for testosterone and skin, get a good face wash, toner, serum and moisturizer, and ideally hit the sauna 2-4x a week for collagen and hgh

$25 a month maybe all in, for a nearly total physical turnaround

 

[GoodMan32]

No, you’re not a tranny. Just someone who’s too lazy to work out, too timid too approach women and too eager to make excuses.

I mean, give me a fvcking break. You really think that you were born the wrong gender because you’d rather have women approach you? lol. If it was up them, all men would rather be approached by women. If it was up to me, I’d sit on a golden throne and have women lining up about the block for a chance to throw themselves at me. And I’m quite confident that I wasn’t born the wrong gender.

Men approach women not because they like putting themselves out there and facing rejection but because they know that if they don’t, nothing will happen. That’s all there is to it.

A combination of the fact I'd prefer to be approached and the fact I'm shaped like a flat-chested woman.

Then there's the fact romantic contact with a man doesn't disgust me to the same degree it disgusts a lot of other straight men (for example, the reactions I got when I mentioned on a post that I'd rather kiss a man than cross paths with a woman I got rejected by)

So you don't necessarily like approaching a woman; I believe that. But the fact you approach gals goes to show: Your disdain for approaching a woman isn't as strong as mine.

I'm aware nothing (or at least hardly anything) will happen unless I make a move. Yet even though I'd like stuff to happen, I still refuse to make a move on a woman I'm going to cross paths with again. Evidently my desire to avoid possibly crossing paths with a woman I got rejected by is stronger than my desire to possibly get dates/sex from her.

 

[GoodMan32]

At the end of the day OP, your mindset is all wrong to begin with.

You shouldn't be worried about impressing a woman, THEY should be worried about impressing YOU.

I've worn basketball shorts, a tank top and a backwards baseball hat to first dates before.

You think I gave a damn whether they would be impressed or not? It was hot out and we were doing an activity date, I was dreasing comfortably and they could kick rocks if they didn't like it.

Ok, I'm going to run with your post.

With your attitude of "I'm going to wear what I like. If the woman doesn't like it, she can gtfo," couldn't it be said that I should do the same (wear what I want, regardless of what a woman thinks)?

If so, I guess the words of the posters telling me to change my wardrobe (in order to impress the ladies) are meaningless.

 

[Thor’s hammer]

A combination of the fact I'd prefer to be approached and the fact I'm shaped like a flat-chested woman.

Then there's the fact romantic contact with a man doesn't disgust me to the same degree it disgusts a lot of other straight men (for example, the reactions I got when I mentioned on a post that I'd rather kiss a man than cross paths with a woman I got rejected by)

So you don't necessarily like approaching a woman; I believe that. But the fact you approach gals goes to show: Your disdain for approaching a woman isn't as strong as mine.

I'm aware nothing (or at least hardly anything) will happen unless I make a move. Yet even though I'd like stuff to happen, I still refuse to make a move on a woman I'm going to cross paths with again. Evidently my desire to avoid possibly crossing paths with a woman I got rejected by is stronger than my desire to possibly get dates/sex from her.

Yes, we all would like to be approached but that is not how life works. You can change your physique by training and right nutrition. Get a PT if you don’t know what to do.

Just bear in mind this: you compete with other men. Those who are willing to put in the work for themselves (looks, money, status, game) will have the upper hand. No amount of bitching and victim mentality will change it.

If you want to become gay, go ahead.

 

[The Duke]

Ok, I'm going to run with your post.

With your attitude of "I'm going to wear what I like. If the woman doesn't like it, she can gtfo," couldn't it be said that I should do the same (wear what I want, regardless of what a woman thinks)?

If so, I guess the words of the posters telling me to change my wardrobe (in order to impress the ladies) are meaningless.

Your social skills, seduction skills, awareness, understanding of women, and physique is not anywhere near @BackInTheGame78 's. He can get away with wearing what he wants because he has other qualities to rely on. You don't have that luxury.

You and Corrector are the greatest debaters on this forum. You guys would rather debate why you shouldn't do something, than actually apply the teachings of this forum and do something to improve your life. At the core you don't want to change. Thats the sad part.

Wear what you want, don't improve, and keep banging hookers. <--That's sarcasm

 

[SW15]

Your social skills, seduction skills, awareness, understanding of women, and physique is not anywhere near @BackInTheGame78 's. He can get away with wearing what he wants because he has other qualities to rely on. You don't have that luxury.

At the end of the day OP, your mindset is all wrong to begin with.

Both these posters are accurate here.

The OP has to work on mindset and physique first before dealing with outfits. Peacoccking (a maneuver popularized by Mystery & Neil Strauss) in late 1990s/early 2000s is a tactic that can work after mindset is in the right place. Peacoccking is also helped by a great physique.

In terms of looks, money, status, and personality, OP would have to address personality issues first (mindset is a part of that). @The Duke is also making reference to personality factors with social skills, awareness, and understanding of women. This thread has revealed more issues with looks, but those are lesser issues at the moment. Personality is the major factor holding OP back.

In terms of looks, money, status, and personality, looks and money are usually more important factors in attraction and seduction.

Very good looks can also offset personality issues, but the threshold for looks to offset personality issues is going to be rather high.

 

[characternote]

Very good looks can also offset personality issues, but the threshold for looks to offset personality issues is going to be rather high.

exactly.

I've had 2 super slayer friends in my life.

The one i'm thinking of was someone who really was very boring indeed. Just didn't really have a personality. But he CLEANED UP with the very hottest girls. But despite being really boring and having no 'game' etc, he DID also seem kind of relaxed and 'confident' (at least in body language) at the same time. I think just as a result of having a lifetime of hot girls throwing themselves at him due to his movie star good looks. He's like the hot girl who never needs to develop a personality.

But I think that (being boring) is different from being considered 'strange'/weird etc. Kinda reminds me of a 'sex and the city' episode (I tihnk?)
where one of the girls was banging some really hot guy who was a dumb as a box or rocks and mega boring etc, but he got a pass due to his looks


And so as someone who certainly thinks looks are a million times more important than 'game', even i'd admit that there are people who are 'off' enough that they will still struggle despite their good looks. My only issue with using this as an argument is that it's just fairly rare. You'd need to have rock bottom social skills and probably a handful of mental issues lol (and so telling someone 'good looks without game is useless' isn't necessarily true at all in my opinion. Only if we define 'without game' as being very very neurodivergent)

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Ok, I'm going to run with your post.

With your attitude of "I'm going to wear what I like. If the woman doesn't like it, she can gtfo," couldn't it be said that I should do the same (wear what I want, regardless of what a woman thinks)?

If so, I guess the words of the posters telling me to change my wardrobe (in order to impress the ladies) are meaningless.

If that's actually what you want to wear you might have even more problems than I thought.

 

[GoodMan32]

Yes, we all would like to be approached but that is not how life works. You can change your physique by training and right nutrition. Get a PT if you don’t know what to do.

Just bear in mind this: you compete with other men. Those who are willing to put in the work for themselves (looks, money, status, game) will have the upper hand. No amount of bitching and victim mentality will change it.

If you want to become gay, go ahead.

You don't "become" gay. You're either gay or you're not.

It would be a lot easier for me if I were gay. Yet I can't help being straight any more than gay guys can help being gay.

By the way, on the topic of making a move on a woman, I go back and forth on whether making more moves would even help. Other than a girl from class I dated for a week in college, expressing interest in a gal I met organically (in other words, non-tech methods) has never gotten me dates (and none of the sex I've had has come from expressing interest in a woman I met organically)

I've had a few other successes from gals I met organically, yet (for the purpose of this discussion) I don't count those (as I didn't make the move; it either came from the woman making the move or it just sort of happened...with neither party officially making the move)

 

[Gamisch]

Your social skills, seduction skills, awareness, understanding of women, and physique is not anywhere near @BackInTheGame78 's. He can get away with wearing what he wants because he has other qualities to rely on. You don't have that luxury.

You and Corrector are the greatest debaters on this forum. You guys would rather debate why you shouldn't do something, than actually apply the teachings of this forum and do something to improve your life. At the core you don't want to change. Thats the sad part.

Wear what you want, don't improve, and keep banging hookers. <--That's sarcasm

Certified troll.

He gonna need WAY more than just push ups lol. He needs to be in the gym EVERY DAY and expect no results the first year. Iam not a PT but imo you can't just undo years of being a couch potato and become mister olympia in a few months. 10 years no fitness= ....3 years to get in some decent shape (including changing habits as bad eating patterns.)

Even tho he responds to every post twice, dude also conveniently ignored my post where I told him the exact same . He's a gaslighter, a troll and passive aggressive.

I would be scared that dudes like him are allowed to carry arms. Luckily we don't have that in Europe. Imagine Dude going haywire one day ..

 

[Divorced w 3]

Ok, I'm going to run with your post.

With your attitude of "I'm going to wear what I like. If the woman doesn't like it, she can gtfo," couldn't it be said that I should do the same (wear what I want, regardless of what a woman thinks)?

If so, I guess the words of the posters telling me to change my wardrobe (in order to impress the ladies) are meaningless.

I have brought women back to an empty apartment, literally with nothing in the living room but a fold out card table, and my bed in the master bedroom, and was told that the floor had kids toothpaste on it and that it looked like a frat house and this woman still had sex with me, knowing full well prior to meeting me my situation as a separated married man. Before you call her whatever name is coming to mind, know that she was 7years younger than me, 8/10, tall, and a practicing attorney at a major law firm. The man you are quoting is entirely right. You are operating with personally limiting beliefs. The obstacles are within you. I tell you anything is possible.

 

[SW15]

He gonna need WAY more than just push ups lol. He needs to be in the gym EVERY DAY and expect no results the first year. Iam not a PT but imo you can't just undo years of being a couch potato and become mister olympia in a few months. 10 years no fitness= ....3 years to get in some decent shape (including changing habits as bad eating patterns.)

It's going to be a combination of diet and exercise. I think the push ups advice is good advice as a starting point. It's going to take a lot more than that. It might not take 3 years but it would be a lengthy process.

 

[Bokanovsky]

You don't "become" gay. You're either gay or you're not.

*Caitlyn Jenner enters chat*

 

[BackInTheGame78]

*Caitlyn Jenner enters chat*

I mean there are a lot of gay guys pretty confident that "one night with me" will change a straight guys mind...maybe OP hasn't run into one yet

 

[GoodMan32]

Your social skills, seduction skills, awareness, understanding of women, and physique is not anywhere near @BackInTheGame78 's. He can get away with wearing what he wants because he has other qualities to rely on. You don't have that luxury.

You and Corrector are the greatest debaters on this forum. You guys would rather debate why you shouldn't do something, than actually apply the teachings of this forum and do something to improve your life. At the core you don't want to change. Thats the sad part.

Wear what you want, don't improve, and keep banging hookers. <--That's sarcasm

I'm making baby steps.

These past few months, I've started moving in the right direction.

exactly.

I've had 2 super slayer friends in my life.

The one i'm thinking of was someone who really was very boring indeed. Just didn't really have a personality. But he CLEANED UP with the very hottest girls. But despite being really boring and having no 'game' etc, he DID also seem kind of relaxed and 'confident' (at least in body language) at the same time. I think just as a result of having a lifetime of hot girls throwing themselves at him due to his movie star good looks. He's like the hot girl who never needs to develop a personality.

But I think that (being boring) is different from being considered 'strange'/weird etc. Kinda reminds me of a 'sex and the city' episode (I tihnk?)
where one of the girls was banging some really hot guy who was a dumb as a box or rocks and mega boring etc, but he got a pass due to his looks


And so as someone who certainly thinks looks are a million times more important than 'game', even i'd admit that there are people who are 'off' enough that they will still struggle despite their good looks. My only issue with using this as an argument is that it's just fairly rare. You'd need to have rock bottom social skills and probably a handful of mental issues lol (and so telling someone 'good looks without game is useless' isn't necessarily true at all in my opinion. Only if we define 'without game' as being very very neurodivergent)

I like to think of myself as above average in terms of looks.

Are my social skills rock bottom? Possibly (at least in the context of getting a woman)

And I certainly have mental issues galore.