I built it, they didn't come

[characternote]

Go back and GeoMax

This dude is doing some geomaxxing. Wonder what sort of results he gets

 

[Bigpapa]

This dude is doing some geomaxxing. Wonder what sort of results he gets

He still has a bad clothing style + bad vibe in general

 

[Rainman4707]

I have some hope left for having children one day, maybe with one of the escorts I'm seeing, who knows.

Having a kid with an escort =/

 

[MatureDJ]

Having a kid with an escort =/

https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/4xoeyl

 

[Dr.Suave]

https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/4xoeyl

That´s some black pill origin story right there

 

[MatureDJ]

Hi guys,

I've just recently discovered this site, but many of the concepts have been familiar to me for years, decades even. I'm not really about learning game, but I read the "book of Pook", and many of the concepts in that series of posts have been second nature to me for my whole life.

I thought I'd collect my thoughts and write about my situation to clear my mind a bit. Any comments are of course welcome.

Here's a short version of the long story that follows:
- 36 years old, life in good order
- Physically fit, at peak fitness
- High status profession, financially well of
- Extreme lifestyle, very much a lone wolf type of guy
- Always been red-pilled, never put any woman on a pedestal
- Girls actually chased me in my early 20s, I was too busy chasing my own dreams
- Now, over a decade later - achieved most of my goals, but no sex life, zero women in social circle
- Have stopped trying to date women, puzzled by today's dating scene - looking for solutions



Long story (I'll break this up into smaller parts):


Let me start with the good things

My life is, in many ways, better than what I had expected it could be when growing up. I come from a lower middle class family from a poor country in Europe. At 36, I'm healthy, in the best shape of my life. I go to gym 4-5x a week and have the same, if not better, physique that I had in my early 20s (I have more muscle mass now than back then, body fat is consistently 10-15%).

I've climbed the corporate ladder to reach a comfortable position with a lot of freedom and great coworkers. It's a high status profession and the pay is very good, too. The only thing I don't like about it is commuting, but what can you do.

On top of my day job, a couple of years ago I started a side business. It has recently started paying quite well, and with three sources of income (career job, side business, and investments), I'm doing quite well financially.

I've achieved many of the things I've set as goals. I played competitive sports when I was younger. I traveled the world in my early 20s. I got the "dream career" in the corporate world. I don't have many items on my checklist anymore. These days, I'm mainly interested in health, and growing my side business and seeing if it can really take off in the coming years.

I'm single, and have been for years. Never married, only had one long-term relationship in my life. I've always been the type of guy who did his own thing, did not follow others' advice. And I really mean that. I have had to fight against the herd quite a few times regarding life choices. I have had to leave behind old friends several times in life and find new ones who are more like-minded.



Lifestyle, personality, and problems

My lifestyle has always been quite extreme. I rarely stop to "have fun" in the sense that most people talk about having fun. I don't party, I don't drink, I don't relax the same way that most people do. This is VERY important, something that cannot be changed: To me, having fun is progressing, competing and challenging oneself. Yes, I did go to parties and had the typical college experience when I was young, but I never liked it much, I just wanted to experience it to understand what it's all about.

The same goes with relationships. I really, really dislike hanging out in a pointless way. I just cannot do it - there has to be a purpose, such as playing a sport, having a meaningful conversation, or learning something new. But any type of "hey you wanna come over, have a few beers and watch the game" I've almost always responded with "no thanks". I cannot change this part in myself, I have tried hard when I was younger.

My days are mainly comprised of these activities:
- Workdays at the office (about 9 hours including commuting)
- Workouts and recovering (0-2 hours per day)
- Developing/running side business (0-4 hours per day)
- Other sports (golf, skiing, tennis, etc.) (mainly on weekends/vacations)
- Reading/learning new things (2-4 hours per day)
- Sleeping (8 hours per day)

I like all this about my life. I have plenty of stuff to do. I'm never bored. I've never really been bored.

But here's what I'm missing big time: sex, intimacy, even a relationship. No, I'm not looking for love or companionship (I don't mind those things, but I'm not actively seeking them), but a regular sex life.

My personality seems to require a traditional type of woman - one who is after a guy like myself. I have experienced it once, in my early 20s. I met a girl who was very feminine. She admired my dedication and just wanted to be in my boat. I was the captain, she was the passenger. She did not require any "entertainment" like going out or spending time doing pointless stuff. I just ****ed her silly, and the rest of the time I carried on with my own stuff. We had the funny conversations and stuff that couples do, even traveled together, but it was all on my terms. Maybe she secretly wanted something more, but she seemed very content with what she got. Eventually after a few years, I got too focused on my own things and broke up with her.

I need a relationship to be of the type where she is very feminine and submissive. I simply would not enter any other type of relationship. Sometimes I wonder if the ideal "relationship" for me would be with a hooker or an escort, since I'm mainly after sex. But I am interested in some kind of stability, so I want to be exclusive with just one person. I just need to be the dominant person in the relationship.

I'm quite rebellious by nature, and have a hard time playing a certain role or doing favors for other people. I'm very straightforward with everything and don't really care about other people's feelings. Basically, I'm the guy in the room who calls bull**** first. As for dating, I'm not able to jump through hoops to date a woman. I absolutely hate trying to impress other people, including women, because that puts you in an inferior position, like you need to prove something. In my view, she either likes you the way you are, and if not, it's her loss (blunt, I know).

My social circle consists of only men, most of whom have a somewhat similar personality to mine. Almost all of them are married with kids though, so I'm an odd person in that sense. I have zero female friends and acquaintances outside work. I've never had any female friends, in fact, no woman has ever wanted to be my friend and vice versa (I don't know if this is a good or a bad thing).

So as you can understand from the above, my situation is probably not very typical. I realize I'm a pretty extreme person, and I've tried changing and playing along when I was younger, but by this age, my personality is very much what it is.

I'm going to take a guess and say that you had success in your home country, which is a poorer, Eastern_European one, and then you moved to a wealthier country, which allowed you to climb the career ladder, but that also took the legs out of your social life. The difference is the locale - it really is that simple.

 

[justaroundthecorner]

(...)So as you can understand from the above, my situation is probably not very typical. I realize I'm a pretty extreme person, and I've tried changing and playing along when I was younger, but by this age, my personality is very much what it is.

Not to dismay you anyhow, but it is more than possible that people simply perceive you as emotionally cold person (which should not be a surprise to you) and females understand these vibes well. The thing is, "giving a **uck"/caring about what other person think is part of relationship game for 99% of women and game never really ends (actually, once you achieve LTR - yup, that's also some kind of achievement - rules of the game modify themselves) which is good, because it's about various needs to be fulfilled, that's how you build something.

It is also possible that, in spite of all the training you do, there is something that is not helping you out in terms of interesting other females to pursue you, that is related to your looks (facial features may be off, height is in not perceived as attractive, you are losing hair etc., your diet makes your breath terrible - and there's like no one to tell you that etc.). Some factor may explain why mid-value SMV females do not pursue you (but there may be also explanation that is regardless of you - that is you live in big city and females there get tons of interest from dating apps - this definitely lowers amount of IOIs from females that you will just pass in the office or malls corridors).

My advice for you would be to try to be better in game, use dating apps (do not prolong the convos there, just go for the date ASAP to weed out mid-interest females - alas still try to get as much matches as you can to raise your in-app ELO) then try to actually date a female that you like - it will be most likely very feminine but traditional/conservative person - this is your LTR material. With the rest you will struggle even with STRs.

I would also try to reconsider some of your priorities for now - at 36, with good career and health, it is finally the time to find your second half of orange - peak SMV for guys is probably somewhere between 35 - 45 with top value between 37-42 (unless deteriorated looks/health before that time) so you are already in the best shots phase when it comes to dating. I would consider that and be serious about dating (perhaps drop some "achievement/upgrading yourself" time - including some gym time - and use it for dating).

The dangers for you are: hookers (easy, transactional way to satisfy basic needs), STRs (may be considered as waste of your time eventually, for low pay-off), pursuing ONSs with low efficiency and finding it waste of time (don't worry same would apply to me), rather low dating experience and your egoistical approach will make you fall into borderline female trap (been there myself) - it is low probability but high damage output risk, also evade gold-diggers (females with photos screaming "I live exclusive life")

The strengths: if that's true what you wrote, you are rather high SMV, alas you need to work about your attitude and perhaps try to strategically assess how you can make the female life for better (it is not about dining and buying her stuff alas paying for the first three dates when you seek for some traditional female helps). Females are not looking for constantly self-upgrading self-centered cyborg - they want the guy that has it all (and emotional intelligence and how you are around the other people is a large part of that all), try to think about it.

 

[Manure Spherian]

peak SMV for guys is probably somewhere between 35 - 45 with top value between 37-42 (unless deteriorated looks/health before that time)

How do you conclude this considering there are broccoli-headed teenage and 20-something men without pots to piss in screwing pretty young women?

This guy’s story should serve as a warning. Those who wait on this area of life, for whatever reason, will likely be waiting forever.

He also wants a free prostitute, literally a woman to make appointments for sex with and nothing more, as human connection does nothing for him. Few women want that.

 

[pipeman84]

I can relate to much of what OP has said in this thread. But he's totally lost me here:

I have some hope left for having children one day, maybe with one of the escorts I'm seeing, who knows.

You consider an escort to be the mother of your children, have you lost your fvckin' mind?
That's not the mindset of a high value man and kind of negates what you said in OP and other posts. You want kids, then start talking to any young woman you find attractive and who looks approachable and see if she qualifies. It's not a PUA thing where the goal is to have sex within 1-3 dates. It's more like an appraisal to see if she's worthy of investing 20yrs of your life and lots of $$.

 

[pipeman84]

What makes you think he's a high value man?

Basically the first 2 posts of this thread. And he says so himself:

I really don't like bragging, but I'm easily in the top 5% of men in many aspects in life (physical fitness, financial situation, social status).