Hi all, I know there have been threads in the past on what's acceptable in a woman's past and what's not, but wanted to throw this one out there. Been dating a girl for about 5 months now, and she's great (HB 8, 29 years old). The one thing that bugs me is that she has had more experience then me. She claims she's had sex with 6 guys, and had 9 relationships (highschool ones she did not sleep with). I've had sex with 9 girls in my life, not that it's a competition. What annoys me the most is that 2 months before she met me she went back and forth between her -ex of 5 years and a new guy she met. She literally had sex with both in the same day. I talked to her about how this concerns me that she didn't realize her own value. She told me she feels disgusted about it and wishes it hadn't happened, but she was tired of both guys being unfaithful so decided that this would "even the score."
This really really bugs me. Though I've done this myself (having sex with two different girls in one day) on two separate occasions, but it does not make me feel better. This is a girl I could potentially marry. We'll be having a great time, but then the negative thoughts just resurface again. I realize common sense says this was in the past, and if she's being honest, her past is pretty average, not to mention I've done the same thing. I just have a problem with a girl I marry having engaged in this type of behavior. I wish she had never told me... Any thoughts on how I can compartmentalize this in my mind? Sometimes I just feel less affectionate towards her when I randomly think about her past. I've seen these guys too out at clubs and it does not help at all. She senses the distance when these thoughts go through my mind, but I feel like talking to her more about it is not going to help.
I feel like I've met plenty of hot girls that did not always need a guy around. It disturbs me that she was not able to remain single or celibate for any long period of time. She's intelligent, kind, really cute, family oriented, etc. Like I said, I've met hot girls that didn't have sex for a year, or didn't have boyfriends for 2-3 consecutive years. Is this a red flag that she always had to have a guy? I'm a bit confused. Is this a girl I can marry and bring into my family??
This really really bugs me. Though I've done this myself (having sex with two different girls in one day) on two separate occasions, but it does not make me feel better. This is a girl I could potentially marry. We'll be having a great time, but then the negative thoughts just resurface again. I realize common sense says this was in the past, and if she's being honest, her past is pretty average, not to mention I've done the same thing. I just have a problem with a girl I marry having engaged in this type of behavior. I wish she had never told me... Any thoughts on how I can compartmentalize this in my mind? Sometimes I just feel less affectionate towards her when I randomly think about her past. I've seen these guys too out at clubs and it does not help at all. She senses the distance when these thoughts go through my mind, but I feel like talking to her more about it is not going to help.
I feel like I've met plenty of hot girls that did not always need a guy around. It disturbs me that she was not able to remain single or celibate for any long period of time. She's intelligent, kind, really cute, family oriented, etc. Like I said, I've met hot girls that didn't have sex for a year, or didn't have boyfriends for 2-3 consecutive years. Is this a red flag that she always had to have a guy? I'm a bit confused. Is this a girl I can marry and bring into my family??