Othello said:
Just from reading your posts, you seem to comply to women a little bit too much.
AGREED,but that's only
part of the problem.
Even though I've already said this a billion times,I'll say it again: The problem is that he's giving her relationship benefits WITHOUT the commitment.
This girl has no reason to want to get into a relationship with him because she's already getting everything she wants in a relationship NOW,
while she's single.
The only difference between the way things are now and the way they'd be if they'd officially became a couple is that if she were to enter into a relationship with him,she'd be tied down.
She wouldn't be getting anything extra that she's not already getting.
It's just that the way things are now,she can come and go as she pleases.
More than likely,she'll just keep things the way they are until she meets a guy she wants to be in a relationship with,then this will be over with.
She's in COMPLETE CONTROL over this situation,and that's the way it'll stay until SBW decides to stand up and be a MAN.
His first post about this situation was on 11-25-09,a MONTH AND A HALF AGO,and nothing has changed,and it's not going to.
Even though he asked for advice back in November,this "madness" started 6 months prior to that,back in June.
So if thing haven't improved in 7 months,I don't know why they'd suddenly get better now,especially when all the advice everyone has given has yet to be applied.
SBW,you seemed to be upset with this girl over those "b!tchy" text messages she sent you the other night.
I don't know why,since YOU'RE THE ONE allowing all this foolishness to take place.
If you'd just be a man and refuse to be treated with anything LESS THAN dignity and respect,she'd either rise her behavior up to the level that she knows you find acceptable,or you'd have kicked her childishness and indecisiveness to the curb a long time ago.
To be honest,I don't know which one is worse:Her immature,infantile behavior,or you
choosing to continue putting up with it.
When a girl strings a guy along like that,that means there's something wrong inside of HIM.
All this drama with a girl YOU'RE NOT
EVEN DATING YET.
Yes,you're right about what I said. If (by
some miracle) you did decide to put your pride and self-respect as a MAN ahead of this twisted,juvenile of a woman,she would throw a fit.
She'd go nuts;calling you,texting you,trying to use sex,whatever she could think of in order to get things back to the way they were when she had you as a backup,a spare tire,just something to pass the time until she met someone she does want to commit to.
She'd do all that,and you'd be deceived...again. You'd think that all that behavior from her meant that she FINALLY saw the light,and now she wants to date you.
So you'd go back,things would be ok for a few days,maybe a week or two,then she'd go right back to treating you like she does now.
Seems to me like you have oneitus. No man in his right mind would settle for being some chick's side show while she's waiting for the main attraction to come along.
I agree with those people who told you "good luck" with trying to sort this thing out.
Hopefully someone will chime in here and give you some sort of info that can help you out in this situation.