How can one be good with women if your not that attractive?

[youngmack]

How can one overcome approach anxiety,spin plates and become successful with women if they aren't very attractive? I've learned that looks are very important to women hence the saying that the guy's looks is what attracts them to him and his personality is what makes her stay or not. Dont you have to pass their looks test before they evaluate your personality?

what if a dude had an awesome personality...He knows the in and outs of "game" and knows how to keep women but he just cant attract them because of his looks. and i'm not talking about artificial looks. like tattoos or piercings im talking about natural looks that come from genetics like rough hair, big nose, big ears, disproportional face etc.

I mean sure you can get some hair products, bulk up in the gym, and get some nice new wardrobe but at the end of the day it all comes down to the face.

Im sure a girl would rather have a not so muscular dude with a pretty face then a muscular dude who is hideous....Any thoughts??

 

[Trump]

You can be good with women with whatever you have, ugly face, weak body, big head...just close the deal.

This forum is so obsessed about looks...money...personality, etc. Granted these things are building blocks of getting the girl or having sex with her, but the bottom line is no cares what you do as long as you close the deal.

All the things this forum says are for yourself, to survive in this world, to be fulfilled. But don't think because you did one thing...getting ripped or gettting surgery, any girl owes you anything. If you still can't tickle her funny bone, you won't be successful.

It's like a car salesman. They could know 5 languages, have six pack, have a million dollars in their bank, but if they can't sell a car...they will be out of a job. Same thing applies to women, because you've done something to improve yourself may help your chances, but doesn't mean you'll score.

 

[Young Stallion]

You can be good with women with whatever you have, ugly face, weak body, big head...just close the deal.

This forum is so obsessed about looks...money...personality, etc. Granted these things are building blocks of getting the girl or having sex with her, but the bottom line is no cares what you do as long as you close the deal.

All the things this forum says are for yourself, to survive in this world, to be fulfilled. But don't think because you did one thing...getting ripped or gettting surgery, any girl owes you anything. If you still can't tickle her funny bone, you won't be successful.

It's like a car salesman. They could know 5 languages, have six pack, have a million dollars in their bank, but if they can't sell a car...they will be out of a job. Same thing applies to women, because you've done something to improve yourself may help your chances, but doesn't mean you'll score.

Trump with all do respect I find this post far off base. "If you cant tickle her funny bone you wont be successfull"...what a load of funnyness. If this was the case all comedians would be scoring chicks like crazy but guess what they are not.

I agree in order to keep a women one has to show good personality, good charisma and the ability to keep girls laughing. But your looks really do get you in the door and if you do not possess the prerequisite looks, most women will not give you a chance, same as us men will not give unattractive looking women a chance. It is a two way street.

Youngmack the answer to your question, the cold hard truth is no if you are not an attractive guy, your success in ATTRACTING women will be limited. If anything you will be the nice guy with good personality that can keep a women if she does like you.

Read my thread 4 undeniable truths about women. This sums things up well.

 

[MisterD]

it depends solely on the individual girl, and her tastes. despite some of what's said on here, there is not one universally attractive physical type

surely we've all seen guys with girls that make us do a double take and question the fairness of the universe

it's because those men have other strengths that make up for their looks, coupled with the fact that the girl finds that particular man physically attractive enough to sleep with him

you don't have to be a 6 foot tall ripped white dude with a model face to get laid. if that was the only man capable of getting laid humanity would be nearing extinction

 

[youngmack]

Trump with all do respect I find this post far off base. "If you cant tickle her funny bone you wont be successfull"...what a load of funnyness. If this was the case all comedians would be scoring chicks like crazy but guess what they are not.

I agree in order to keep a women one has to show good personality, good charisma and the ability to keep girls laughing. But your looks really do get you in the door and if you do not possess the prerequisite looks, most women will not give you a chance, same as us men will not give unattractive looking women a chance. It is a two way street.

Youngmack the answer to your question, the cold hard truth is no if you are not an attractive guy, your success in ATTRACTING women will be limited. If anything you will be the nice guy with good personality that can keep a women if she does like you.

Read my thread 4 undeniable truths about women. This sums things up well.

Exactly this is what i thought..I've seen dudes who are all that good looking with very successful lives I.E has everything going on for them with great personalities get stepped on for attractive dudes with absolutely no lives smoking their lives away. I guess thats just how things are ,really nothing we can do about it but to improve ourselves and hopefully we stumble upon a high quality female

 

[nismo-4]

Trump with all do respect I find this post far off base. "If you cant tickle her funny bone you wont be successfull"...what a load of funnyness. If this was the case all comedians would be scoring chicks like crazy but guess what they are not.

Comedians are scoring chicks like crazy. Because they're rich!

I agree in order to keep a women one has to show good personality, good charisma and the ability to keep girls laughing. But your looks really do get you in the door and if you do not possess the prerequisite looks, most women will not give you a chance, same as us men will not give unattractive looking women a chance. It is a two way street.

Some will give you a chance if they know you're rich. Girls would have no problem giving Zuckerberg a chance for obvious reasons. Like Rollo and I say, Your bulletproof game and charming personality won't make you look any more physically or financially appealing. A lot of guys are giving unattractive women a chance because they have few options (or lack thereof).

Youngmack the answer to your question, the cold hard truth is no if you are not an attractive guy, your success in ATTRACTING women will be limited. If anything you will be the nice guy with good personality that can keep a women if she does like you.

That is true!

Read my thread 4 undeniable truths about women. This sums things up well.

Read betwee- You should know.

Work on yourself if you aren't physically and/or financially fit.

 

[cola]

I won't sit here and pretend like females don't notice/care about looks. That would be delusional. I will however say that I don't think they care to the extent of us. Females respond more to your physical presence than your physical looks.

In example most of the guys I know who get a lot of female attention have a very certain walk. Its just a way you walk/stand that says you are prepared to take on any challenge. Its the same walk that would make a would be robber think twice if he saw you walking at night.
Most guys who view themselves unattractive don't carry themselves this way.

Another thing is tonality/voice. Guys who are certain don't mumble, mutter or stutter. They speak loud and annunciate.

These are a few things that may catch her attention as much or more than your genetic looks but still look your well groomed best and you should be fine with what you got as far as looks.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

A man in good physical shape and a good sense of fashion is attractive to females. So if you think your ugly as hell then get your butt in the weight room and get into good physical shape.

This is a quote from myself. Your clothes and physical attributes can definitely make you more appealing looks wise to females.
Most cats here are obsessed and swear up and down that if your not an attractive dude you gotta come out your pocket or you won't get any money. Well listen, just because you spend money on broads means that everybody else does. I've seen some Gucci Mane lookin guys pull dime pieces because of their mouthpiece. Their ability to lace a girl with game.

When you believe in yourself, and your confident, and a leader anything is possible.

Now that's all I got to say about that and to be honest none of this crap even concerns me because I'm beautiful g0ddamnit!!!

 

[sstype]

I get complimented regularly on my looks and physique by strangers yet I still get rejected by the women I pursue. So no, being attractive does not make it any easier or guarantee easy street with women.
Yeah maybe some guy who looks like Thor will have women throwing themselves at him but that kind of look is attainable by only 0.01% of men anyways. You're better off making improvements in your attitude, dating skills, and game. Focus on what you can improve rather than trying to live up to some unrealistic physical ideal.


So by all means hit the gym, wash your face, and wear nice threads, but understand that looks get your foot in the door, game seals the deal.

 

[ilikecharlene]

Looks are not everything, but to say they don't matter is being mindlessly PC.

 

[Trump]

Trump with all do respect I find this post far off base. "If you cant tickle her funny bone you wont be successfull"...what a load of funnyness. If this was the case all comedians would be scoring chicks like crazy but guess what they are not.

It's a metaphor...it's means you have to attract them in whatever way possible. It doesnt actually mean you have to be funny

I agree in order to keep a women one has to show good personality, good charisma and the ability to keep girls laughing. But your looks really do get you in the door and if you do not possess the prerequisite looks, most women will not give you a chance.

You are missing the point. All we want is the deal to be closed inwhatever way possible. Now whether to close the deal with women is about 100% looks, 100% money, 100% confidence, it's not for us to decide. Of course the first thing a women will see is your look, like any consumer in the world would when buying a product, but after, if you can keep the interest, she will look past that for other factors., it depends whats important to her.

 

[cola]

Face is all that matters?

Here's my face:
http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=25864569

Yet I'm still an AFC at this site. Women's tastes in men vary WILDLY. I dont have many women throwing themselves at me, and my club game is largely non existent because I'm 5'7".

Re the muscular v face thing, I think a nice face is more important but height is more important than both. I say this based off of discrimination I get from men AND women re: height my entire life(I used to be way short for my age, now I am a little below average but still am the "short guy" in most groups). Also, I gained a lot of muscle so my face looks bloated now(not like it does in the first two pics there) but my body is like a bodybuilder's body and I get LESS play than ever, so thats why I think face is more important than muscle.

Hey Plush, ever think about short chicks? I think a 5'2 chick would be less descriminating about your height than a 5'9 chick. Even though I'm sure You can get the 5'9 chick too this may build Your confidence. Just a idea.

 

[MasterFuu]

I have seen all kinds of man attracting hot woman. One of my buddies bald, short , fat and not rich guy with a wild personality and confidence married a model thats taller then him. I've seen this type of thing many times. As long as you are confident as who you are chicks will gravitate towards you. Also it's a numbers game. Talk to ten chicks and I bet that at least one will date you.
It's not how tall you are or big you are but how tall or big you THINK you are.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Face is all that matters?

Here's my face:
http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=25864569

Yet I'm still an AFC at this site. Women's tastes in men vary WILDLY. I dont have many women throwing themselves at me, and my club game is largely non existent because I'm 5'7".

Re the muscular v face thing, I think a nice face is more important but height is more important than both. I say this based off of discrimination I get from men AND women re: height my entire life(I used to be way short for my age, now I am a little below average but still am the "short guy" in most groups). Also, I gained a lot of muscle so my face looks bloated now(not like it does in the first two pics there) but my body is like a bodybuilder's body and I get LESS play than ever, so thats why I think face is more important than muscle.

No man should ever refer to himself as an AFC. I can understand doing something that was AFC but don't say that you are. Wheres the confidence playboy?

On a sidenote I'm a 6'3 playa and I've noticed that I can probably get any 5'3 light skinned shawty. They seem to love the kid. haha

 

[youngmack]

Hm yea understandable and reasonable point if views here, well maybe its because im am speaking according to my age group and environment... Im 16 and with girls my age its all about looks as far as i know and experienced. They would sit and say personality is what they look at first but thats bs because all the popular dudes in my school and area are all very attractive.

They turn down every guy they think is "ugly" or not attractive enough without even getting to know him personally . Its like they say " oh this guy is ugly im not even gonna bother to get to know him, his personality is ugly just like him". Even the ugliest girls over here look for looks first smh..

So yeah probably its just with younger girls 14-18 but hey this is what a young dude like me has to live with right now.

 

[bish0p]

it depends solely on the individual girl, and her tastes. despite some of what's said on here, there is not one universally attractive physical type

surely we've all seen guys with girls that make us do a double take and question the fairness of the universe

it's because those men have other strengths that make up for their looks, coupled with the fact that the girl finds that particular man physically attractive enough to sleep with him

you don't have to be a 6 foot tall ripped white dude with a model face to get laid. if that was the only man capable of getting laid humanity would be nearing extinction

When did being white become a preference for the majority of women?

 

[Atom Smasher]

You don't need genetically good looks. You need to project a sense of style, cleanliness, and self-respect. Those three things will eclipse so-so looks.

In addition, shoes. Women will judge you on your shoes. Many, MANY men are completely oblivious to this or don't believe it. They will read your character from the condition of your shoes.

 

[WORKEROUTER]

Ironically I think that not being extremely good-looking can work in your favor.

A lot of guys who are naturally good looking don't need to work on deeper aspects of their game. Merely knowing how to approach and keep a conversation going is often enough (at least to bag chicks quickly, from bars especially). I've gamed with plenty of good looking guys who don't even really need to approach because the chicks basically open themselves up to them either directly (by approaching them) or by positioning themselves in such a way that facilitates the approach.

A lot of guys who aren't good looking or just average looking are like you. They focus on what they don't have. These guys fill up the seats at the workshops on how to get women and buy every book there is on gaming. They might have the mechanics of game down but mechanics mean nothing if you don't have the foundation. The foundation is built on a deep sense of inner confidence and security.

Your friend sounds like he might have the mechanics down. At the same time, he might be using knowledge of the mechanics in order to masquerade his deep insecurities about his looks, etc.

Most average looking or below average looking guys seek the mechanics of game in order to fix what they think they lack. Ironically however I believe the real game develops when you realize that all of the game you needed was right there to begin with. You didn't need to fill any kind of void by learning mechanics. The mechanics are merely icing on the cake but in the beginning they seem like everything.

The mechanics can help to build the inner confidence necessary. For example, doing cold approaches is a powerful tool to getting over the insidious worry about what others think about you. Approaching mixed sets helps you to stand your ground in face of arrogant ****-block guy friends who want to shut you down.

Knowing how to keep a conversation going allows you to get inside the minds of those you interact with, and by doing so may help for you to see your own gifts and strengths that lye dormant as you spend your time obsessing over what you think you lack.

Most guys will never reach this point of evolution in their game. The good looking guys don't ever really need to. The average and below average looking guys usually settle for the sporadic hookup that they can pull with mere mechanics (usually some drunk fattie from a bar), and eventually fall into relationships out of desperation.

The point is that you need to focus less on how you can be good with women and focus more on being congruent with yourself and your own strengths. Once you become supremely confident with yourself you will begin to see how insecure most people are, including some of the hot chicks out there who are so dependent on attention. Women will be magnetized to you because of your inner strength and independence. You won't need to be thinking about how to be good with women or what your "moves" should be because each action you take will simply flow naturally from your self-worth.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Here's another point...

She's evaluating your looks on what her friends will think of you more than how you look to her. If you don't look so hot it reflects badly on her with her friends.

For that reason, if you show a sense of neatness and style this is almost always sufficient for her to rationalize that you will be deemed "acceptable" to her friends.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Here's another point...

She's evaluating your looks on what her friends will think of you more than how you look to her. If you don't look so hot it reflects badly on her with her friends.

For that reason, if you show a sense of neatness and style this is almost always sufficient for her to rationalize that you will be deemed "acceptable" to her friends.

True story kids.