Hooking up is not viable in 2023?

[nzrod]

It all happens in the private messages (or DMs -- Direct Messages).

How do you find girls in your area in your age range on Insta?

 

[Solomon]

How about Seeking Arrangements? I heard that one is like taking candy from a baby. I heard it’s the new Hinge so it might be my next go with OLD. Anybody try it?

Be careful I've heard horror stories of guys getting robbed and std's

 

[Gamisch]

Ive had this new theory bubbling inside of me after about a decade of game (minus 3ish years for a relationship who I met thru game):

In the US in 2023, long-term bachelorhood is no longer a viable option for some types of guys.

In different terms: the more complex and chaotic a culture is, the better it is for many of us to stabilize our relationships and focus on the long term. A big reason being to avoid self-destruction.

Consider the following: increased loneliness due to suburbs, long commutes, lack of walkable cities, lack of any interesting social scenes, and increased tech addiction leading to social ineptitude. Consider the impact of feminism on our culture and how disappointing the dating scene has become.

I think a long-term game lifestyle would have been better in different times and/or different places. Some examples:

Pre-tech era fun social scenes especially in big cities like NYC, time period: 80s, 90s.
Modern day: 2nd or 3rd world countries minimally impacted by feminism.
Modern day: US cities but have to be a top 5% guy, cash and lifestyle. I know a short asian dude in his 50s who bangs 8-9s cuz he's got a yacht and is loaded.

But right now, we live in too chaotic a time. There is too much complexity and social change. It's not a fun time of joie de vivre at least in my eyes (call me cynical) but I don't feel it. There seems to be sadness and void. Is this really the time to prance around like everything is great and go hunting? I mean I get being careless in a sort of masculine way but is this really the time and place? I think most of us will self-destruct by living this way bc the lack of deep relationships + the chaotic social/professional world we live in will be too much on our nervous systems.

I think this is the time to get serious. The world is falling to sh1t and hook up culture is wack and dissapointing. The music, the art, the movies, they're all trash. I seriously think it's better to just find a solid chick and create your own world or just go monk mode.

I know some of you can relate. Not all of you. But it's a call to higher living.

I don't know if everyone gets what it is your saying. On the other hand ,everyone will have his own way of interpreting the message . The way I read it , i agree 10000% with this. Everyone now knows about " the mythical badboy who women love " and this agenda that teaches us to be azzholes and d1cks instead of nice, congruent gentlemen. Men rather act like criminals and show degenerate ways, BUT NOT ME THO!!!

Hardly ever do I meet a sane woman these days. Hardly ever do I meet a stand up guy grounded in his masculinity whose NOT a huge simp. Men aren't honest anymore, and true brotherhood seems like a lost art. Women are holding out for Mr perfect, and that makes men step out of the game completely in a unhealthy way.

Young kids are severely frustrated , a lotta guys ages around 17-20 are soley fecking hookers.

Look fellas , the ONLY thing that you can do is to get more and more and more in touch with your spiritual being. It's a huge fight just alone to stay sane, clean and sober and decline the many, many forms of addictive stuff they throw at us like games porn Netflix, soft porn like Only fans , I saw a thread about AMSR(??) where a woman can simply put on and off clothes and make money with it.

I dont know about y'all , but the More I get in touch with my spiritual being, the more I'm aware of my worth. Here are some things I use personally to keep my head above the water;


-work out. Psychically challange yourself often
- don't count on other people's sanity in these crasy times
-pick up a (acient) philosophy ,or maybe 2 or even 3
-pray to whatever God suites you
- IMPORTANT!!! ; stay AWAY from mind numbing entertainment such as games, porn, netflix ect. These seem innocent, but they're far from innocent...
- eat healthy. Don't consume too many fastfood, cook with whole foods, nd always conscious
- be patient when ( dealing with) dating..find ways to discipline yourself sexually. why? The last thing you want /need is being dependent upon the mercy of these crazy Jezebels.
- embrace your hobbies more and more. Live to conquer your long awaited challenges/things on your bucket list.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Look fellas , the ONLY thing that you can do is to get more and more and more in touch with your spiritual being. It's a huge fight just alone to stay sane, clean and sober and decline the many, many forms of addictive stuff they throw at us like games porn Netflix, soft porn like Only fans , I saw a thread about AMSR(??) where a woman can simply put on and off clothes and make money with it.

This is exactly what I mean. I've been going to church recently and I'm not even known to be religeous but in my current experience, it's the only thing that makes sense. Its already taking me EVERYTHING to fight off the urge to self-destruct day in and day out and avoid all the vices and BS around me. Getting in touch with my spirituality and sort of disengaging from the world of hedonism seems to be the only worthwhile path for me. Someone recently posted a quote by Shopenhauer and his thoughts on asceticism as the only way to negate the will. I agree. And again, I don't think we live in an age where hedonism is remotely fun or fulfilling. Compare that to the guerilla fighter who gets taken into a friendly village and hooks up with some chick, that's fun, that's adventure! But being in today's stale trash ghetto sexual market place is just pure masochism.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Disagree. There are more long term bachelors in the USA now as compared to points in the past. Long term bachelorhood looks different now. It's mainly incel to borderline incel men and MGTOWs.

A lot of these long term bachelors are consuming a lot of porn and are pay pigs on OnlyFans.

That's what I mean. It's not a fun viable option for most men. Most men eat sh1t while 3 dudes get all the results.

And to the rest of ur comment, that's my further point, the cities we live in are not set up for an optimal social experience. They are set up for an optimal business experience in some industries though but that's about it.

 

[EndlessNameless]

Ive had this new theory bubbling inside of me after about a decade of game (minus 3ish years for a relationship who I met thru game):

In the US in 2023, long-term bachelorhood is no longer a viable option for some types of guys.

In different terms: the more complex and chaotic a culture is, the better it is for many of us to stabilize our relationships and focus on the long term. A big reason being to avoid self-destruction.

Consider the following: increased loneliness due to suburbs, long commutes, lack of walkable cities, lack of any interesting social scenes, and increased tech addiction leading to social ineptitude. Consider the impact of feminism on our culture and how disappointing the dating scene has become.

I think a long-term game lifestyle would have been better in different times and/or different places. Some examples:

Pre-tech era fun social scenes especially in big cities like NYC, time period: 80s, 90s.
Modern day: 2nd or 3rd world countries minimally impacted by feminism.
Modern day: US cities but have to be a top 5% guy, cash and lifestyle. I know a short asian dude in his 50s who bangs 8-9s cuz he's got a yacht and is loaded.

But right now, we live in too chaotic a time. There is too much complexity and social change. It's not a fun time of joie de vivre at least in my eyes (call me cynical) but I don't feel it. There seems to be sadness and void. Is this really the time to prance around like everything is great and go hunting? I mean I get being careless in a sort of masculine way but is this really the time and place? I think most of us will self-destruct by living this way bc the lack of deep relationships + the chaotic social/professional world we live in will be too much on our nervous systems.

I think this is the time to get serious. The world is falling to sh1t and hook up culture is wack and dissapointing. The music, the art, the movies, they're all trash. I seriously think it's better to just find a solid chick and create your own world or just go monk mode.

I know some of you can relate. Not all of you. But it's a call to higher living.

Fully agree with what is said here.

However it is strange how sometimes my negative view of the dating market and today's society in general does not correspond to what I see in reality:
- all my work colleagues are married or in a long term relationships
- I see a lot of 20 something happy couples in the street.
- A girl recently told me that all her friends are getting married. There was a bridal fair in my city recently and the event was packed.

 

[obelisk]

However it is strange how sometimes my negative view of the dating market and today's society in general does not correspond to what I see in reality:
- all my work colleagues are married or in a long term relationships
- I see a lot of 20 something happy couples in the street.
- A girl recently told me that all her friends are getting married. There was a bridal fair in my city recently and the event was packed.

Perception does not equal reality. Remember, the hivemind and feminism want you to buy into the lie.

How many of those men in those marriages or LTRs are happy?
How many of those marriages are sexless?
How many of those marriages of your coworkers will ultimately end up in divorce with the guy getting divorce raped (over 50%)?
How many of those 20-something couples are destined to last?
How many of them are simply in the honeymoon phase?
How many of that girl's friends are simply late 20s/early 30s and simply locking down a guy, ANY guy because their biological clocks are ticking and they desperately want to have kids and the guy be damned?
How many of the men they intend to marry are completely oblivious to the sad realities of marriage these days for men and how it can/will financially and emotionally destroy them in divorce if they choose the wrong mate and don't end up as another sad statistic?
How many of those women are viewing these guys as starter husbands that they will trade up in a few years once the post-honeymoon glow wears off?

There is a reason white hetero post-divorce men age 40-54 have the highest rates of suicide in America.

Yep. Dating market sucks. Just be careful when you start to think that it is actually fluffy clouds and rainbows (either at present or a few years down the road) for all these people. Far better to be informed and forewarned.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Fully agree with what is said here.

However it is strange how sometimes my negative view of the dating market and today's society in general does not correspond to what I see in reality:
- all my work colleagues are married or in a long term relationships
- I see a lot of 20 something happy couples in the street.
- A girl recently told me that all her friends are getting married. There was a bridal fair in my city recently and the event was packed.

Yeah that's a good point! I know some guys who regularly get laid too but in my experience, it's the guys who are kind of dumb alphas. I don't know, all I know is I have a lot better luck with hotter, more sophisticated women to some degree. One of my issues is that I take women personally in the US, I find their communication style extremely distasteful which makes it hard for me to wanna pursue. Or when I'm on drugs. Maybe I'm just not really wired for easy fun quick lays. I dont know but I know a lot of people share my view/experience. I guess deep down I don't know. Although I have friends who do amazingly well over seas but get dog sh1t over here.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Perception does not equal reality. Remember, the hivemind and feminism want you to buy into the lie.

How many of those men in those marriages or LTRs are happy?
How many of those marriages are sexless?
How many of those marriages of your coworkers will ultimately end up in divorce with the guy getting divorce raped (over 50%)?
How many of those 20-something couples are destined to last?
How many of them are simply in the honeymoon phase?
How many of that girl's friends are simply late 20s/early 30s and simply locking down a guy, ANY guy because their biological clocks are ticking and they desperately want to have kids and the guy be damned?
How many of the men they intend to marry are completely oblivious to the sad realities of marriage these days for men and how it can/will financially and emotionally destroy them in divorce if they choose the wrong mate and don't end up as another sad statistic?
How many of those women are viewing these guys as starter husbands that they will trade up in a few years once the post-honeymoon glow wears off?

There is a reason white hetero post-divorce men age 40-54 have the highest rates of suicide in America.

Yep. Dating market sucks. Just be careful when you start to think that it is actually fluffy clouds and rainbows (either at present or a few years down the road) for all these people. Far better to be informed and forewarned.

Yeah agreed here. Was talking to my coworker and he's a reasonably fit young industrious guy and is about to marry an absolute whale of a woman, a woman I wouldn't even bang more than once if I was drunk (sometimes a fattie in the past was my drunk last resort as many of us could attest to). In the US, this is what men have been conditioned to accept.

 

[obelisk]

I simply have no tolerance for fat women (leaving that undefined intentionally) these days. It's simply a deal breaker for me. Obesity almost always moves in the wrong direction over time.

 

[The Duke]

I ditched both Tinder and OKC yesterday after Tinder suddenly wanted me to perform for the camera to get 'verified'. No thanks. I'll find something else to do on the toilet.

I've had a few matches on bumble require me to be verified after we matched in order to text them. I deleted those prospects. If you aren't smart enough to figure out if I'm real or not then I don't want to know you.

 

[Epicwinguy]

How about Seeking Arrangements? I heard that one is like taking candy from a baby. I heard it’s the new Hinge so it might be my next go with OLD. Anybody try it?

You need to be rich to use that

 

[BoomToTheMoonAlice]

its the jab.

 

[obelisk]

I have seen posts for awhile that Seeking Arrangements is nothing like it was. The grift is on within that app compared to what it used to be like to meet women. No personal experience with it to vet the accuracy of such opinions.

 

[Smok1nAce]

People are constantly bombarded with doom and gloom. Politics, war, health epidemics, inflation, gender wars, ect..

And you expect women of that society to want to reproduce? lol.

Women are scared.

 

[allergictobs]

There is just something in the air. People are not the same. women have changed as well.

I've been hesitant to think this way for a long time, but I have to admit I'm now quite convinced that a major shift has occurred in the past 10 years or so. I could write a lot about this, and in my opinion, the true human nature has been exposed.

I've said this before (and Aaron Clarey has talked about this a lot): women don't like men that much, and they probably never did. The main reason why couples were formed in the old days was transactional: women needed money/assistance from men and they sold sex to them (in the form of marriage).

I look at my social circle, either work-related or close relatives, and the majority of women in their 30s and 40s are now single. Some of them have kids, but no husband. They seem content, they are not searching for anything. They have let themselves go physically, gained weight.

What has happened over the past 10-20 years is that the majority of young professionals in almost every high-paying field is now women (tech is still somewhat of an exception, but even that is changing). Women prioritize education and playing the career game - that's their main focus, not relationships.

Also, most women don't really need sex or companionship of men. Women mostly want attention, which they can get either from swipe apps or having a night out with the girls.

Any man who says they are "hooking up" in 2023, I have to assume are either lying or they are doing it with very unattractive women.


If a man wants high-quality sex and/or companionship, the only way these days is an emotion-based LTR or straight up paying for it. Most women (probably 80-90%) don't want a LTR or generally much anything to do with men, so you have to find the rare 10-20%, or resort to transactional relationships.

Now, if someone thinks that this is a sad reality we are living in....well, it was always this way. The truth was hidden, but now it has been revealed. The eternal confusion of men not understanding women has also been removed: there was never anything to be understood, women just didn't like us guys that much but didn't want to say it straight up because they were financially dependent on men.

 

[kavi]

Women are suckers for THE GAME. The Game is like crack to women. Only Alpha Males can bring that level of Game that women cannot resist. This is why every woman always has a fantasy to fall in love with a guy and experience GAME at the highest level. So women will always be looking for those types of men. They may not like men, they may hate men whatever, but they can only get that level of Game from the few men who know it so those few men will always be in demand from women.

 

[Gamisch]

Women are suckers for THE GAME. The Game is like crack to women. Only Alpha Males can bring that level of Game that women cannot resist. This is why every woman always has a fantasy to fall in love with a guy and experience GAME at the highest level. So women will always be looking for those types of men. They may not like men, they may hate men whatever, but they can only get that level of Game from the few men who know it so those few men will always be in demand from women.

Yup.

Thats why the man in female oriented novels ALWAYS a absolute 100% alpha beast, including with money and ripped physique. We can cope all we want, but it won't change anything .

One thing I start to notice tho is that women also actively seek attention and thus getting their fix in more healthy productive ways. I fitta salute them, they take initiatives and refuse to wait for a man before they will do, eat , see, listen, taste and discover many things about life.

Men refuse to work, grind and make mkney because boohoo no woman wants them
.womem be like F that, F playing COD all dya, F dresing like a bum smelling like azz because i have no man.

Women also carry each other regardless of their relationship status. That's why you will always see a flock of a few women here and there. Even at parties/festivals.

Women create traditions such as eating out every few months ,even vacations.

Men on the other hand...either ditch their "brothers " for p00sy, or become depressed and ditch their own "brothers" due to lack of p00sy. I've lost many socalled "friends " sue to the latter . They never understood that we should learn from them (women) how to move..

 

[Gamisch]

No, they're not.

Your whole 'theory' is just an excuse for justifying your own failures. Don't look for excuses. Just work on yourself.

Can i respectfully ask you to elaborate on your point of view?

How are women NOT suckers for game?

Even queen b @BeExcellent will probably attest to this. Women love the game, the main issue is so many man refuse to play along.

 

[deadmasterx]

It gives me the feeling that people nowadays talk too much about sex, but rarely do it at all. With social media turning average girls into "super models", women's ego is at its peak. Honestly speaking, it has gotten more and more common to find women who are completely uninteresting, as if they have some brain cells missing, relying completely on their looks.

I think the 'hook-up' culture is slowly (or fast?) dying because women are demanding much more than a hot guy to open theirs legs lately. In short, they are demanding more for the same product, kinda like how inflation works.

Naturally, it isn't all women's fault. We men are letting things like that happen. If a guy is determined enough to approach and get a girl, he probably will be successful. It just feels like girls used to be simpler and more interesting than they are today, which results in a lack of interest on both sides.