Guys, Would you still ask this girl out/be exclusive with her?

[Desdinova]

I'm 23 and he's 30.

You're the same age as my GF. Interesting...

So he already knew had plenty of options to begin with, but 55? Again, no one could possibly have a roster of 55 people.

How many male friends do you have on Facebook? If you take that into consideration, 55 is entirely possible. So is 155.

I'm starting to think I have a weird sense of humor.The last days of the two days of him contacting me he said" hey". I replied with," hola rarito" (spanish for weirdo). He asked if i that meant nerd and I said no close, it means weirdo and he never responded back.

If you haven't developed a good working rapport with this guy, then it's going to come off as an insult. But I guess that works with your core values and morals, since you seem to believe you can do whatever you want without repercussions.

 

[GoodOne123]

It really was a joke. Do I have lots of options? I'll admit it, yes. He's 30 and 24 so off my age alone I would think people had plenty of options. He's says things like I'm sure guys never tell you no, how do you handle all these guys always hitting on you?", etc. So he already knew had plenty of options to begin with, but 55? Again, no one could possibly have a roster of 55 people.

I'm starting to think I have a weird sense of humor.The last days of the two days of him contacting me he said" hey". I replied with," hola rarito" (spanish for weirdo). He asked if i that meant nerd and I said no close, it means weirdo and he never responded back. So after he spilled his feelings a few days later I call him a weirdo. I'm sure that made it worse and made him feel stupid huh? Or am I thinking too much into calling him a weirdo?

I guess you might just have a unique sense of humour then. Its best if you just be yourself with this guy and see how it turns out?

I'm saying this because if you constantly have to explain your sense of humour and what you mean to someone, then meybe you are not compatible. But if they get you they will stick around.

I'm not saying be 100% yourself around him because it's too soon for that, but show the real you when appropriate. But I'd say try to explain in the beginning that you have a cheeky/jokey sense of humour and clarify what you really mean when a joke or anything else seems to be misunderstood. He will either warm up to you, or he will not get you. If he still doesn't feel the humour and you feel like walking on eggshells with whatever you say, meybe it's not right to stay with someone like that. You would be better of being with someone who gets you if you end up in that situation.

If you called him weird straight after he spilled his guts out being all serious, I can sort of see why he might feel offended. But if the vibe was jokey it's fine. He called you weird before so he should be able to take it as well.

 

[Asmodeus]

I'm saying this because if you constantly have to explain your sense of humour and what you mean to someone, then meybe you are not compatible. But if they get you they will stick around.

I was just going to type that... If they get together I give them 5 months tops before they become sick of each other and break up. And that is me being generous.

 

[Asmodeus]

It really was a joke. Do I have lots of options? I'll admit it, yes. He's 30 and 24 so off my age alone I would think people had plenty of options. He's says things like I'm sure guys never tell you no, how do you handle all these guys always hitting on you?", etc. So he already knew had plenty of options to begin with, but 55? Again, no one could possibly have a roster of 55 people.

I'm starting to think I have a weird sense of humor.The last days of the two days of him contacting me he said" hey". I replied with," hola rarito" (spanish for weirdo). He asked if i that meant nerd and I said no close, it means weirdo and he never responded back. So after he spilled his feelings a few days later I call him a weirdo. I'm sure that made it worse and made him feel stupid huh? Or am I thinking too much into calling him a weirdo?

I can tell you like him. You are very infatuated with this guy (though you will likely not admit it here). I say this because you came here with all thee questions and obviously care about what he thinks of you.

However, look at all the issues you two are having and you are not even a couple. You two have only gotten to know each other, and already you two cannot seem to understand each other.

OP, if you have plenty of options you should certainly have a better one than this. I am sure this man is attractive and has things going for him, but the most important thing in any relationship is compatability and understading. Good luck with that, you are going to need it.

 

[ritapita20]

I guess you might just have a unique sense of humour then. Its best if you just be yourself with this guy and see how it turns out?

I'm saying this because if you constantly have to explain your sense of humour and what you mean to someone, then meybe you are not compatible. But if they get you they will stick around.

I'm not saying be 100% yourself around him because it's too soon for that, but show the real you when appropriate. But I'd say try to explain in the beginning that you have a cheeky/jokey sense of humour and clarify what you really mean when a joke or anything else seems to be misunderstood. He will either warm up to you, or he will not get you. If he still doesn't feel the humour and you feel like walking on eggshells with whatever you say, meybe it's not right to stay with someone like that. You would be better of being with someone who gets you if you end up in that situation.

If you called him weird straight after he spilled his guts out being all serious, I can sort of see why he might feel offended. But if the vibe was jokey it's fine. He called you weird before so he should be able to take it as well.

Thanks. Yea that's the thing we joke all the time. That's why we clicked so instantly and we have the same temperament actually. I haven't had to explain myself before. Never had to walk on eggshells with him either.

He didn't start being weird until after he spilled his feelings. He asked if he was my number one and only one (like he had told me) and l laughed (nervous laugh) and I said he was, but he said he didn't believe me. So I guess him not finding/understanding my humor right now is understandable. I called him a weirdo via text soooo of course with stupid text messaging you can't pick up tone. So as you said after he spilled his feelings and I called him a weirdo I can see it coming off wrong as well.

 

[GoodOne123]

Thanks. Yea that's the thing we joke all the time. That's why we clicked so instantly and we have the same temperament actually. I haven't had to explain myself before. Never had to walk on eggshells with him either.

He didn't start being weird until after he spilled his feelings, which is understandable. I called him a weirdo via text soooo of course with stupid text messaging you can't pick up tone. So as you said after he spilled his feelings and I called him a weirdo I can see it coming off wrong as well.

In that case you guys seem to be getting along for the most part.

I'd say that clearing the air between you two would be best at this point. Dont give up yet, like you said you both get along.

Once you talked about what you need to with him, I don't see why you can't give it a shot and be exclusive with him for a while. You like this guy too much not to give it a try. Besides, you're still young and have time, so even if it doesn't work out you don't lose much.

 

[YawataNoKami]

So a woman is a wh0re because she's dating multiple guys? Aka not putting her eggs in one basket? OK. A man does it and that's him keeping his options open, but a woman does it and she's a harlet. Well that's not chauvinistic at all...

A key that can open many locks is called a master key, but a lock that can be opened by many keys is a sh!tty lock. Can not turn a hoe into a housewife. Move on cupcake,this ain't Cosmopolitan.

 

[ritapita20]

A key that can open many locks is called a master key, but a lock that can be opened by many keys is a sh!tty lock. Can not turn a hoe into a housewife. Move on cupcake,this ain't Cosmopolitan.

Sexist, misogynistic, chauvinist, paleolithic sized brain, need I go on?

My body count is still on one hand but because I keep my options open while single I'm labeled a ***** and called cupcake? That's disgusting. You're disgusting.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Sexist, misogynistic, chauvinist, paleolithic sized brain, need I go on?

My body count is still on one hand but because I keep my options open while single I'm labeled a ***** and called cupcake? That's disgusting. You're disgusting.

Actually the "multi" dating was a tactic of females done with no shame. Males where just "cheating"... The deal with multi dating, is you cannot take a multi dater serious. So the plates system adopted due to the female "multi dating", it wasn't the other way around. Males adopted to what females where doing.

 

[ritapita20]

Actually the "multi" dating was a tactic of females done with no shame. Males where just "cheating"... The deal with multi dating, is you cannot take a multi dater serious. So the plates system adopted due to the female "multi dating", it wasn't the other way around. Males adopted to what females where doing.

That may be so, but you can't go around calling women wh0res because she's multi dating, not sleeping around, while single. That's just wrong.

I think spinning plates or multi dating is all because a lack of trust. I do it to keep my options open because I'm assuming that he's doing the same. Just as you've stated the men are doing it because they assume we're doing it as well. When in reality I would prefer to just focus on one person, and I'm sure some men would too, but in fear of being made a fool of we're all just trying to hedge our bets.

I think a good portion of this can be avoided if both parties from day 1 say exactly what it is they're looking for.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

That may be so, but you can't go around calling women wh0res because she's multi dating, not sleeping around, while single. That's just wrong.

I think spinning plates or multi dating is all because a lack of trust. I do it to keep my options open because I'm assuming that he's doing the same. Just as you've stated the men are doing it because they assume we're doing it as well. When in reality I would prefer to just focus on one person, and I'm sure some men would too, but in fear of being made a fool of we're all just trying to hedge our bets.

I think a good portion of this can be avoided if both parties from day 1 say exactly what it is they're looking for.

She is being an opportunist in most cases, and it's her right, but our right to identify opportunist. Like you said, she may very well not be screwing ANY of them either. I personally know women can run a game with 20 guys, and even zero of the guys gets any sex. I know that's true.

 

[Desdinova]

My body count is still on one hand but because I keep my options open while single I'm labeled a ***** and called cupcake?

I'm still waiting for a count of all the "guy friends" you have on Facebook. I'll bet your "55" number actually isn't that far off from the truth.

 

[ritapita20]

I'm still waiting for a count of all the "guy friends" you have on Facebook. I'll bet your "55" number actually isn't that far off from the truth.

That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. There is no correlation between the number of FB friends you have of the opposite sex and how many people you've slept with.

If you're a very attractive person a lot of people are going to try and talk to you but it doesn't mean you're sleeping with them. Do I have a lot of guys as FB friends? Yup I sure do. How many have a slept with from there? Only the ones I have dated. Trying to come up with some silly correlation like that is at the worst an insecure way to look at things. At best it's incredibly stupid and doesn't make any sense.

 

[Desdinova]

There is no correlation between the number of FB friends you have of the opposite sex and how many people you've slept with.

It's not how many people you've slept with, it's how many people you have the possibility of sleeping with. You can't fvcking tell me that all those guy friends are on your facebook because you like talking with them about great places to get your nails done. They are there because you get attention from them, and they probably would like to fvck you at some point. Regardless, they ARE options.

So are you sitting at 55 or more?

 

[ritapita20]

It's not how many people you've slept with, it's how many people you have the possibility of sleeping with. You can't fvcking tell me that all those guy friends are on your facebook because you like talking with them about great places to get your nails done. They are there because you get attention from them, and they probably would like to fvck you at some point. Regardless, they ARE options.

So are you sitting at 55 or more?

You're right sure they would all love f*ck me lol but what does that have to do with me? If you're an attractive person that just comes with the territory. I can't help that guys want to jump my bones but unless I have feelings for them I have no desire to sleep with them. Again, I my body count is one hand. I have never slept with anyone that I haven't been genuinely interested in. So no, my body count is no where near 55.

 

[guru1000]

If it's playful banter, then fvck him if he can't take a joke.

But, if there is any element of truth, then I would tell you to take a hike. Hot girls are dime a dozen to top DJs; so what you can get away with with other betas does not work with DJs. You would be recognized and discarded without a thought.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

If it's playful banter, then fvck him if he can't take a joke.

But, if there is any element of truth, then I would tell you to take a hike. Hot girls are dime a dozen to top DJs; so what you can get away with with other betas does not work with DJs. You would be recognized and discarded without a thought.

It is a dime a dozen or 10:1 or worse. And these good dressing females usually do it on another mans pockets.

 

[Desdinova]

You're right sure they would all love f*ck me lol but what does that have to do with me? If you're an attractive person that just comes with the territory. I can't help that guys want to jump my bones

You have every right to say, "No, I don't need you hovering around me. I want to be respectful for the right guy who comes along". But fvck no, you have to keep your orbiters around for the male attention and the selection should you feel the desire to fvck one of the guys who are throwing themselves at you.

So your roster of men you could fvck is still high. Although you may not be fvcking guys like a wh0re, you give off the persona of being a wh0re. No man wants a woman with dozens of orbiters, because that's the trait of a wh0re.

 

[ritapita20]

You have every right to say, "No, I don't need you hovering around me. I want to be respectful for the right guy who comes along". But fvck no, you have to keep your orbiters around for the male attention and the selection should you feel the desire to fvck one of the guys who are throwing themselves at you.

So your roster of men you could fvck is still high. Although you may not be fvcking guys like a wh0re, you give off the persona of being a wh0re. No man wants a woman with dozens of orbiters, because that's the trait of a wh0re.

Sigh. Here we go again. So I need to shut down other guys while I'm 100% single so that the right guy can come along. Okay, so how the hell am I supposed to ever meet someone or go out on dates? Wait for a match maker? Again, your logic is flawed.

 

[ritapita20]

If it's playful banter, then fvck him if he can't take a joke.

But, if there is any element of truth, then I would tell you to take a hike. Hot girls are dime a dozen to top DJs; so what you can get away with with other betas does not work with DJs. You would be recognized and discarded without a thought.

Yea I took it as playful banter. I thought he was joking so I just joked right back with an outrageous number but then when another guy called my phone and he got drunk and said all that stuff I guess he wasn't joking.