Guys, Would you still ask this girl out/be exclusive with her?

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Asmodeus

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Why do you say that? He's said he didn't mean that stuff when he was drunk so he's okay.
People are quick to forgive and look past others flaws early on in this type of thing. In infatuation and the honeymoon period we can look past such things. But over time these little annoyances shall become more and more. And compound upon themselves. But time will tell...
 

Desdinova

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What it boils down to is common sense, not gender equality.
Okay, let's go with that... my common sense tells me not to take a wh0re as a companion.

Now, let's look at my gf... She actually WATCHED me pick up a woman at the bar. She kept hanging around while I dated this chick who turned out to be a wh0re like you with multiple male friends. I dumped that chick and banged my soon-to-be gf, but told her that I didn't want a relationship with her. She kept trying to get into a relationship with me, but I kept resisted, so she left me alone.

Fast forward a year, and she runs into me at the bar. I sent her a message later and she told me that she could never "just be friends" with me. She wanted it all or nothing. So I took her as my gf. FYI, she doesn't have a single guy friend.

Now, wouldn't common sense dictate that she should have just ditched me when I picked up another chick right in front of her? Or how about me fvcking her and not wanting a relationship? Or how about our mutual friend warning her that I've dated and fvcked tons of women? Why did common sense fail here? Why did she still find me attractive? Why did she still desire to be with me? Why? Why? Why?

Because GENDER EQUALITY IS BULL5HIT. It goes against nature. You cannot change what nature has dictated individually for a woman and a man. This is just the way the sexes behave. The more you ignore it, the more problems you're going to have. The more you accept it, the better off you're going to be.
 

ritapita20

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Okay, let's go with that... my common sense tells me not to take a wh0re as a companion.

Now, let's look at my gf... She actually WATCHED me pick up a woman at the bar. She kept hanging around while I dated this chick who turned out to be a wh0re like you with multiple male friends. I dumped that chick and banged my soon-to-be gf, but told her that I didn't want a relationship with her. She kept trying to get into a relationship with me, but I kept resisted, so she left me alone.

Fast forward a year, and she runs into me at the bar. I sent her a message later and she told me that she could never "just be friends" with me. She wanted it all or nothing. So I took her as my gf. FYI, she doesn't have a single guy friend.

Now, wouldn't common sense dictate that she should have just ditched me when I picked up another chick right in front of her? Or how about me fvcking her and not wanting a relationship? Or how about our mutual friend warning her that I've dated and fvcked tons of women? Why did common sense fail here? Why did she still find me attractive? Why did she still desire to be with me? Why? Why? Why?

Because GENDER EQUALITY IS BULL5HIT. It goes against nature. You cannot change what nature has dictated individually for a woman and a man. This is just the way the sexes behave. The more you ignore it, the more problems you're going to have. The more you accept it, the better off you're going to be.
Well I must be a wh0re with common sense and a backbone, much unlike your girlfriend.
 

playa99

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Why would someone take whats happened before him and apply it to themselves? Really?

You pretty much said that you fvcked a guy about whilst fvcking multiple men. Both men and women are interested in high quality individuals. No-one wants common ore.

You then joked about still having a roster... How can you not see that looks bad? It is a major red flag.

If a man told you he had cheated on a previous GF, would you not be concerned?
 

ritapita20

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Why would someone take whats happened before him and apply it to themselves? Really?

You pretty much said that you fvcked a guy about whilst fvcking multiple men. Both men and women are interested in high quality individuals. No-one wants common ore.

You then joked about still having a roster... How can you not see that looks bad? It is a major red flag.

If a man told you he had cheated on a previous GF, would you not be concerned?
I made sure to clarify that I wasn't sleeping with those people. It was me just keeping my options open - dating multiple men. As far as me joking about still having one I was just replying to his joke about asking where he stood.

But I'll agree that if a man said he had cheated that would concern me.

I don't think he's concerned though.

"He got drunk the other night and asked how to get to the top spot, asking if his ranking is really that low, said "I'm sure your top person calls your princess", "I have a top person too". "Actually I'm joking you're the only one and I'm letting you know now that i f you talk to other guys that would hurt my feelings". I just chalked it up to him being drunk and that he didn't mean all that stuff. He contacted me the next few days after that but then got silent on me for days. So I reached out to him and I get a text this morning saying he was just joking about the roster thing. So I guess it really doesn't bother him and there's no need to address it anymore?"
 

BeExcellent

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Unpleasant truth is often softened with humor. He got the joke but he also had his ego insulted due to the disregard the joke implied.

This is bothering him, even though he is trying to brush it off.

Say nothing more about it & carry on.
 

ritapita20

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Unpleasant truth is often softened with humor. He got the joke but he also had his ego insulted due to the disregard the joke implied.

This is bothering him, even though he is trying to brush it off.

Say nothing more about it & carry on.
Well we were supposed to on this trip together and now he's saying he doesn't think its a good idea.
 

playa99

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I made sure to clarify that I wasn't sleeping with those people. It was me just keeping my options open - dating multiple men. As far as me joking about still having one I was just replying to his joke about asking where he stood.

But I'll agree that if a man said he had cheated that would concern me.

I don't think he's concerned though.

"He got drunk the other night and asked how to get to the top spot, asking if his ranking is really that low, said "I'm sure your top person calls your princess", "I have a top person too". "Actually I'm joking you're the only one and I'm letting you know now that i f you talk to other guys that would hurt my feelings". I just chalked it up to him being drunk and that he didn't mean all that stuff. He contacted me the next few days after that but then got silent on me for days. So I reached out to him and I get a text this morning saying he was just joking about the roster thing. So I guess it really doesn't bother him and there's no need to address it anymore?"
Look at his actions, he has gone silent on you and text you in an insecure manner!

He is concerned, but more than likely is desperate for a woman.

You may not need to address it directly, but you need to show that you can be trusted by your actions and words.
 

Asmodeus

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I made sure to clarify that I wasn't sleeping with those people. It was me just keeping my options open - dating multiple men. As far as me joking about still having one I was just replying to his joke about asking where he stood.

But I'll agree that if a man said he had cheated that would concern me.

I don't think he's concerned though.

"He got drunk the other night and asked how to get to the top spot, asking if his ranking is really that low, said "I'm sure your top person calls your princess", "I have a top person too". "Actually I'm joking you're the only one and I'm letting you know now that i f you talk to other guys that would hurt my feelings". I just chalked it up to him being drunk and that he didn't mean all that stuff. He contacted me the next few days after that but then got silent on me for days. So I reached out to him and I get a text this morning saying he was just joking about the roster thing. So I guess it really doesn't bother him and there's no need to address it anymore?"
He may say he is fine and took it as a joke... But actions always speak louder than words. Pepole often say something yet have their behavior and actions betray their words... Always trust actions, I can tell you all the lies in the world with weaving words, however my actions never betray my real intent and views.
 

Asmodeus

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Well we were supposed to on this trip together and now he's saying he doesn't think its a good idea.
Also, why would you want a beta male who shows such passive aggressive traits? He feels he got rejected and now he is going to act all salty. Look at his behavior and really ask yourself if you think you want to deal with this in the long run. You must like salt, you are chasing after a salty guy who seemed pissed at you...

I am telling you that you two sound incompatible. it would be a tumultuous relationship.
 

GoodOne123

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I would not consider making the girl in question my girlfriend. The statement shows that she has a lot of men after her, which is okay in itself, but she is choosing to keep them around as opposed to becoming exclusive with the one she truly likes.

Also, being number "55" on the roster expresses blatant disinterest, you are basically saying that you prefer many more men before the guy you are saying this to.

These two points give me an impression that the girl is a player, and not only that, but a girl that doesn't find me that attractive! Now you tell me, would you make a GUY that does that to you your boyfriend? Most girls would say no.

If the girl was joking, she should explain herself to the guy, and apologise for playing games and being dishonest. That's the only way I personally would take a girl back that said something like that to me.

You do realise that any confident man with any options that is looking for a girlfriend will be strongly put off by a statement like that?
 

Desdinova

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Well I must be a wh0re with common sense and a backbone, much unlike your girlfriend.
I don't trust the words of a woman who describes herself. I always find them to be untrue.

And I like my GF just fine. No dudes hanging around, feminine, low sex partner count, spoils me, and she's been trustworthy thus far.
 
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ritapita20

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I would not consider making the girl in question my girlfriend. The statement shows that she has a lot of men after her, which is okay in itself, but she is choosing to keep them around as opposed to becoming exclusive with the one she truly likes.

Also, being number "55" on the roster expresses blatant disinterest, you are basically saying that you prefer many more men before the guy you are saying this to.

These two points give me an impression that the girl is a player, and not only that, but a girl that doesn't find me that attractive! Now you tell me, would you make a GUY that does that to you your boyfriend? Most girls would say no.

If the girl was joking, she should explain herself to the guy, and apologise for playing games and being dishonest. That's the only way I personally would take a girl back that said something like that to me.

You do realise that any confident man with any options that is looking for a girlfriend will be strongly put off by a statement like that?

Ahhhh I see now. Even though 55 was a joke it still indirectly means I have a roster and even though its an outrageous number and clearly isn't true the fact that I didn't say #1 and only 1 it still seems like he's not someone that I'm all that into? Gotcha.

So why even contact me those two days after the fact? Now when he said I was his number one and only girl I'm wondering if he meant that as well too when he was drunk... :/
 

MrWood

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me thinks this thread is a fvcking joke
OP said this directly to raise her SMV to dude = fail

OP: i bet you are a HB5/6 at best and dude is likely abit out of your league to begin with.
Likely, as previously mentioned, he is a AFC and insecure, but that dont change his SMV.

you fvcked up.

btw: my count is much over 50 and I was in exclusive relationships for 20 years... so 35 is a small number there... babe.
 

GoodOne123

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Ahhhh I see now. Even though 55 was a joke it still indirectly means I have a roster and even though its an outrageous number and clearly isn't true the fact that I didn't say #1 and only 1 it still seems like he's not someone that I'm all that into? Gotcha.

So why even contact me those two days after the fact? Now when he said I was his number one and only girl I'm wondering if he meant that as well too when he was drunk... :/
You say it was a joke, but it wasn't JUST a joke was it? You were indirectly trying to show him that you have lots of options and that even though you may be interested in him, you are not interested that much. This was done to make you seem desired by many, and a challenge to tie down ( I.e be your number #1).

It's fine to communicate these things to a person, but you went overboard on this in my opinion. It can be taken the wrong way as indicated by my first post. You don't want that to happen especially since you seem to like him, otherwise you wouldn't post about it here.

Now, going back to the topic of your jokes I talked about in the first paragraph of this post. The guy believed all of this and ate it all up. Most likely because he is inexperienced and insecure. I don't care how drunk I am, I don't tell a girl she is my "number #1" when we just started dating. It's at the very least a sign that he doesn't have any other options other than you, quite a lot of guys don't have many options.

He may like you, but he may feel discouraged at the same time. This may be because he knows you have many options and may not pick him, like you communicated in your jokes. He could also think you are a player or not that interested as I indicated in my first post, and doesn't see a point in seeing you anymore. So he contacts you because he may like you and is under the allure of you being a challenge, yet is hesitant to meet up because he thinks you might not be interested or thinks you're a player or thinks you are not going to pick him out of all the guys you are seeing.
 
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mrgoodstuff

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Look at his actions, he has gone silent on you and text you in an insecure manner!

He is concerned, but more than likely is desperate for a woman.

You may not need to address it directly, but you need to show that you can be trusted by your actions and words.
He might not be "desperate", he might have been taking her serious while she is dating multiples, so she can be more laxidazial about the process. Yeah it would sting many guys to know she's not taking your time that serious due to her actions. Even if she isn't boning them, she's giving them an opportunity to try.
 

ritapita20

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me thinks this thread is a fvcking joke
OP said this directly to raise her SMV to dude = fail

OP: i bet you are a HB5/6 at best and dude is likely abit out of your league to begin with.
Likely, as previously mentioned, he is a AFC and insecure, but that dont change his SMV.

you fvcked up.

btw: my count is much over 50 and I was in exclusive relationships for 20 years... so 35 is a small number there... babe.
No, not at all. I'm 23 and he's 30. Im not sure what HB is but if it's looks I'm def not a 5/6 and the out of my league part I think it's the other way around to put it nicely." He's says things like I'm sure guys never tell you no, how do you handle all these guys always hitting on you?" etc. I'm Latino and he's white and I'm the first Latino girl that he's ever dated. So i don't think him being out of my league is the issue...
 

mrgoodstuff

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But the answer to the original question would be NO. You can occasionally try to "hit", but you shouldn't waste a lot of time on a female seeing a bunch of guys.
 

ritapita20

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You say it was a joke, but it wasn't JUST a joke was it? You were indirectly trying to show him that you have lots of options and that even though you may be interested in him, you are not interested that much. This was done to make you seem desired by many, and a challenge to tie down ( I.e be your number #1).

It's fine to communicate these things to a person, but you went overboard on this in my opinion. It can be taken the wrong way as indicated by my first post. You don't want that to happen especially since you seem to like him, otherwise you wouldn't post about it here.

Now, going back to the topic of your jokes I talked about in the first paragraph of this post. The guy believed all of this and ate it all up. Most likely because he is inexperienced and insecure. I don't care how drunk I am, I don't tell a girl she is my "number #1" when we just started dating. It's at the very least a sign that he doesn't have any other options other than you, quite a lot of guys don't have many options.

He may like you, but he may feel discouraged at the same time. This may be because he knows you have many options and may not pick him, like you communicated in your jokes. He could also think you are a player or not that interested as I indicated in my first post, and doesn't see a point in seeing you anymore. So he contacts you because he may like you and is under the allure of you being a challenge, yet is hesitant to meet up because he thinks you might not be interested or thinks you're a player or thinks you are not going to pick him out of all the guys you are seeing.

It really was a joke. Do I have lots of options? I'll admit it, yes. He's 30 and 24 so off my age alone I would think people had plenty of options. He's says things like I'm sure guys never tell you no, how do you handle all these guys always hitting on you?", etc. So he already knew had plenty of options to begin with, but 55? Again, no one could possibly have a roster of 55 people.

I'm starting to think I have a weird sense of humor.The last days of the two days of him contacting me he said" hey". I replied with," hola rarito" (spanish for weirdo). He asked if i that meant nerd and I said no close, it means weirdo and he never responded back. So after he spilled his feelings a few days later I call him a weirdo. I'm sure that made it worse and made him feel stupid huh? Or am I thinking too much into calling him a weirdo?
 

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