Originally posted by corruptrelic
Clooney correct me if I'm wrong but I don't think he's giving the full story. There's a difference between having a hot girlfriend who has guys drooling all over her and who doesn't respond to their advancements - than a HB who actively misleads guys, lets them approach her, flirts with them, and even gives out her number.
That is just plain disrespectful in my opinion. She's in a relationship with you, she shoudn't be flirting with other guys and playing with other guys hearts.. how long until one of these guys hits all her right buttons and then she can blame it on "it just happened"? Its like she's in a relationship with you, yet she seeks her attention from other guys, she's not single, but she acts single. This isn't a good picture.
Accept the fact that insecurity and distrust are two different things. If you have a HB girlfriend and a guy approaches her and she does the honest, respectufl thing and says something like "Thanks, but sorry I already have a boyfriend." she's faithful, trustworthy, and the kind of woman you should be happy with.
But if she says "Wow really? You like my legs? Here's my number, give me a call some time and we'll get together, and I'm available!" That's just an attention wh0re. (NO offense to you clooney.)
I sware my one-itis was EXACTLY like this. She kept claiming interest in me yet she went out with other guys, danced with them, mislead them, flirted with them, hugged them, did everything and yet in the end she would always say "But I'm only interested in you." I stopped caring what she SAID and started paying attention to what she DID - and she did the same thing your girl did, flirted with every guy out there. She was a fine spanish girl and I really have no problem with guys noticing her, thats just complimenting you! But when she activiely goes out and starts misleading these guys, this is another whole thing.
And if you are hanging back telling her you dont care about all these guys, it doesn't bother you at all, don't you think you're giving her the impression you just dont care?
I agree its good to give some degree that you dont care, hey do your own thing.. but when a girl is in a serious relationship she needs to know that you CARE at least some, trust me on that. And the things she does and you act like you dont care, hey.. you dont care if you dont care, right? So why not keep doing what she's doing, and believe it that one of these guys is going to find out what she wants, convince her that she can do better, and next thing you know she'll be leaving you for another guy, all because you never cared in the first place. What kind of committed relationship is this by the way? Is this supposed to be exclusive? Because apparently it isn't!
It reminds me so much of one-itis and how she played with all these other guys, I had so much distrust in her I decided it was time to stop worrying. It was time to find a faithful, honest, LOYAL woman who doesn't play games. And there are a ton of them out there. You can stick around with a girl who goes out with every guy in town, and hope she'll stay faithful. But why would you want to put up with that unnecessary worry? You can do better things in your time than to wonder what guy she's talking/seeing/whatever else with don't you think?
So I'm going to agree with slickster - call her on this and tell her enough, and let her know you're ready to walk away if she doesn't stop. Remember as far as I know this post was a little incomplete, its not just guys hitting on her, but its her LETTING them hit on her, and even going as far as giving out her number to them. Its not just guys paying attention, its vice versa, her paying just as much attention to them as they are her. How could anyone trust someone like that?
She's the one that needs to change, and if she can't, you have to talk a walk and not look back. There are so many other girls out there who will be honest and loyal that it's crazy to stick around with one until she gets to use the common "it just happened" excuse.. she let it happen, and to some degree so did you, because you didn't care what she did with other guys. I definitely feel for this post though.. and I hope you'll strongly think about the future, and ask yourself, is it really worth staying in something that you feel uncomfortable in? When you know there are about 3,000 other women right around the corner, who are perfectly happy with just one guy, and not only do the say it with their words - but they PROVE it with their actions.. something your girlfriend apparently has yet to do.