field report - date went well. or did it? what next?

[Golden Arms]

ogre - I've been reading your posts for a while here. Question - it seems like lately you've been meeting women almost exclusively over the Internet. While you are doing that, are you also approaching any women in real life ?

 

[ogre]

it seems like lately you've been meeting women almost exclusively over the Internet. While you are doing that, are you also approaching any women in real life ?

I work from home and I live in a 'hood with no social life. when I do get out and about I do meet women. example, the indian girl I mentioned on this post, I was in a bar with some friends, I just walked up to her and talked to her.


damn dude, forget about this chick!

why? we're still talking - but now that I know where she's at I know better how to handle the sitch. point is I'm not worked up over her anymore and I am of course approaching other women - duh -

my email to her (based on our phone convo) - not sent yet :
best place to meet - find a nice café where I can legally park the bike in front. A bus/train terminal is not a good idea.
oh, and If you need to break or change plans, just call to let me know. it's OK. I have bad hair days too.

 

[al77]

Originally posted by ogre
damn dude, forget about this chick!

why? we're still talking

best place to meet - find a nice café where I can legally park the bike in front. A bus/train terminal is not a good idea.
oh, and If you need to break or change plans, just call to let me know. it's OK. I have bad hair days too.

She leads you but her IL is low. And probably you are going to spend even more efforts to get her...just s waste of time. Forget her in the sense do not put more efforts in getting her. Act like you are busy with her,, and move on to a new girl.

Email: You are talking too much about details "bus\terminals...if you need...". Don't supply these details, since she sees them as "talking too much"->"appear as desperate".

 

[ogre]

you're right. it's pointless...

right now I have zero in the pipeline. christie and the indian girl are kinda sorta in the periphery but no one with any real IL. this is not a good feeling. bad case of the desperate creepies.

 

[al77]

Originally posted by ogre
you're right. it's pointless...

right now I have zero in the pipeline. this is not a good feeling. bad case of the desperate creepies.

Aha! I can tell you it is not that bad time for you as you might think. Look at it this way: at first you are all excited about online opportunities, of course: they "promise" to give you women and you even dont have to get your ass off the couch.

But there is a hidden trick: all online dating websites have the opposite interested from what we have: they want us not to find a good match, but rather find crappy matches and come bakc again and again... So the system that we are dealing with was designed with a different goal...

Anyway, when you act excited at first, you automatically put lots of energy in dating, i.e. letters, phone convo etc... that sends a message to women "desperate", they don't care what the reality is, they operate based on simply and very stupid assumptions.
For example, when wwriting to the most interesting women I found online, I tend to write a lot... and of course, they run away after the first large letter...At some point of time I started thinking tehy are not even remotely human, since most of them have no idea what common sense is. But this is just thoughts.

Once you reached that stage when you think "it's pointless" you start acting like you don't care: you can make joke about women,
you can tease them... since you dont care anymore what they think, it's pointless.... See? So little frustartion helps you reach this state of not caring. Of course it is better if you do not care out of yoiur confidence... but this way works too.

I think you dont have to pay too much attention wheather gals have high IL, you have to just weed out chicks with low IL and do not waste time on them.

Continue and be more funny! You dont care what they think now...plus of course more ****y.
Simple example:
A chick saw my pics, liked them and send me an email with some compliments. Her profile smells "high maintanence" so I replied in a slightly ****y way:

Me:
Cute pic, nice interests for a modest girl...just for a change of this positive line I'll say that you really want to be impressed. I'd like to talk to somebody who wants to impress me Are you good at it? Hi I am Al.

What do you think? She ran away? no way! She replied:

She:
Well I know that I am "different", if that's what you are looking for. I have a wide variety of interests, can adapt to my surroundings whether it be at home in jeans and a tee watching a movie or out on the town to the opera in a gown and heels. I am looking for a man who is just as flexible. I love comedy, ART of course and wine (mainly ones made w/Moscato grapes but will venture off to others if that's not available). And the fact that you are sagitarius can make for an interesting night...I think!!!
What do you think Al?

Thats a hilarious classic example: once I got into the ****y mode (I didn't care to come up with somethig funny) she started "asking" me to validate her, that she is nice and good enough for me. It is sad though: I cannot care less about her, and she seems has somewhat higher than average IL in me.

So, if you get in to c&f most chick will dig you just because you are c&f, try it more, now you naturally care less about women.

 

[ogre]

my email replies are getting better and all that. yes it's true that if I look for her validation/approval I probly wont get a response. I have to look like I'm doing her a favor by even bothering to write.

but still.... something I'm just not getting right. always the same pattern. I meet a girl, she likes me at first, but then even the very act dialing her # just sends it all down the shytter.

what should I do? get her # then not call at all? that doesn't work either. wait 5-9 days between attempts like Doc Love says? tried that - takes months and still doesn't work.

you guys have girls calling you all the time.

seems like nothing I do works. I build up my game and then it all collapses like a house of cards.

I thought I was making some progress - christie was my first internet date - I thought for sure shorty would be the next, and that things would start getting better. but no, things are going nowhere. ogre is home alone while other men are f*cking the women he desires.

then these women post ads on CL pining for the one they love, saying "oh please I miss you come back", "I knew your were a player but I still love you", "you hurt me so bad but I love you anyway" and on and on and on. there are a few men in NY that are scoring ALL the puzzy, leaving a trail of broken-hearted women.

why can't I do that?

and how do I respond to this?

 

[al77]

Lets see: You meet a girl from online. Date went ok. But after it you cannot reach her by phone?

It happened to me all the time, since I have pics which are much better than I am. So I learnt that a) there is no need to call her since if she doeant like you she is not gonna pick up the phone and it may drain my energy to keep calling her b) better to sent her a very short email with a simple idea for teh second date. She either wont reply (fine, we know what she is not after) or reply with "LJBF" letter or reply with "Yes, thats cool".

So you date her, send SHORT email next day without praising her and forget about the whole situation. No need to wait.

Another thing: it seems you aim to high: if you are 40 ans she is say 28 it is super tough for her to develop high IL to you even if look like Brad Pitt. If you ern like him, it would be easier for her.. but anyway, it is not the case here.
I'd suggest to conact women who are a) closer to your age group.
b) are not "party girls" c) have been single for a while (if she borke up with her BF\husband last month, forget about her she'll be bitter as hell anyway d) earn not too much e) look not like a super hot skinny blond model.

You gotta do some screening for those a-d in email to improve the results.
Plus, don't forget, the main part is being c&f: would you share some c&f email of yours?

Those who easily score the puzzy..well usually they don't really care what kind of girl she is, so they pump up adrenaline and aggressiveness and go for some party type girls. I am sure it works that way, though I doubt you want it.