She's just an ex-fat girl. Probably still has body image issues.
I've seen a few of these. One of the girls in my social circle is a hottie and does some modeling now. I recently found out she used to be a fattie back in high school (accidentaly saw some old pictures at her parents house). It's crazy how different she looks now, but my girlfriend did tell me that she still has LSE over it and I guess got offended where sometime last year I joking called her a "fat ass" during a river rafting trip. I didn't even know she got mad, but I guess she told my girl about it (who I wasn't dating at the time lol).
So yeah, I've seen a few of these, fatties turned hotties, and it seems like most end up with some level of low self esteem, but if it's not horribly bad, these girls can actually make pretty good mates, as their head is not all up in the clouds. Hence, you may have a somewhat normal girl as she didn't grow up with the priviledges of a knockout who got her ass kissed all her life, and she is a hottie now! Too bad this one doesnt' like you though, otherwise, she'd "date ya" lol.
She's totally fine with hanging out but doesn't want to date.
I don't want to just mess around.
Well, once again, if she doesn’t' want to date, it means that she is probably not interested. You've been on this board long enough, haven't you got that basic down? If a chick doesn't want to date you, she may give you a 1001 excuses, but the bottom line is, she is not interested man.
"I don’t' know if I should talk to her a certain way, I don't want to just mess around"... ok, well you know what.. your BEST chance in this hopeless scenario is in fact to "mess around"... this allows you to control how you want to develop this "relationship" and where you want to lead it to.
You have to physically/sexually advance on this girl, and she may then be interested, where at first she didn’t' see you in this sexual light. So proceed sexually and make moves on her, make out with her, and advance as far as you can. If you’re good at this, she will WANT to be with you.
I actually a similar talk with one of my close buddies. He is the “picky type” that never seems to make sexual advances and only wants to date “properly”, and for a long time before sleeping with a girl. This guy is very good looking, but struggles with women. He calls me often asking questions, but he won’t listen to the advice. He has been single for a long time, he’s 27 now, and has never really had a steady girlfriend.
He has been recently hanging out with some Latina hottie who approached him first along with her friend. They have been “dating” for almost a month, is what he told me on the phone last week. I said “great man, that’s awesome I’m happy for you”. Then we talked about it a little bit more, and I find out that they not only haven’t had sex, but in fact they barely even make out. They’ve only made out a few times here and there, and he takes her on these “proper dates” and has not brought her over or been over her place.
I told him “what the F are you doing? How many times did I talk to you about this?” And he goes “I know man, but I really like this girl, she’s different. I feel like we know each other so well, we talk about everything and anything. We stay up laying just talking about our selves. She asked me what my biggest fears are, and then she told me hers. I mean, we have talked about everything. I’m not gonna lie, I’m really starting to like her a lot”.
He went on to say how lately she has been a bit standoffish and doesn’t always return his calls or texts until much later. He went on to say how it’s “more than just about the sex, and sex is not so important, bla bla bla bla BLA” and I told him… “I agree, it is more than just about the sex, but you absolutely HAVE to sex this girl up man, or you’re gonna just end up rejected because she is losing interest as you’re not making any moves, or worse, you might even end up her buddy”… “yeah I guess you’re right, I’ll try something bla bla..”
We talked about an action plan where he is gonna bring her over and end up making a move. Well, he did actually take some action, and ended up at her place instead of his. He stayed up in her bed until 04:00 AM, and supposedly did some heavy making out and dry humping. I asked him why he didn’t hit it, and he said “it just didn’t happen tonight, but we both had a good time, I’m really into her now, her body is just banging.” I’m like that’s awesome man, great progress, but you should have nailed it also, and he is like “well I tried taking her skirt off, but she stopped me” LOL I’m like “Jesus dude, you don’t just reach and try to take the skirt off, where the hell are the basics at, get her turned on after some making out, and proceed slowly. I think you very well could have had her, especially after you got to the point of dry humping, you should have tried to advance then.” But he said he thought the night went well.
This was Thursday night, he texted her on Friday but got no response all day long. He told me on Saturday morning, that he didn’t’ get a response yet, and that he’s not gonna text her back anymore unless she writes him back.
I take this as another of a million lessons, that if you wait to damn long to close the deal, the girl will lose interest in you sexually. It’s good to build anticipation and all, but you eventually have to deliver. Or else.
Please learn from my buddy.
