Does this guy fancy me(like me) or is he just using me for sex??

sassygirlie89

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Ok so I met this guy on a night out almost 7 weeks ago. We were both really drunk even though I don't really get beer goggles so I could tell he was good looking and I don't just go off with someone I don't find attractive. So long story short we did have sex and the sex was great.

He wanted to meet me again so he told me to add him on facebook. However over those 6 odd weeks he has been very inconsistent with texting and facebooking even though when we do message each other we get on great together and he always leaves kisses, cute emoticons, asks me stuff and calls me gorgeous all the time! Also he always kept bringing up that we have to meet up again.

So we met for the second time last friday night, we had a great night (sex included), he bought all of my drinks, he didn't want me to buy him any even though I did! We seem to have a lot in common and he acknowledged that as well. He also said his friends and my friends have to meet up for a night out. He also said something when we were a little bit tipsy along the lines of, do you think I'd come all the way from kilkenny(40 mins away from where we met) just to meet up with anyone??!!

He drove me home the next day also which is another 25 mins away. My parents could have easily seen him when he dropped me home but they didn't so he obviously does not mind my parents seeing him dropping me home. Anyway he said he would give me a text later that day but he never did. That didn't bother me because he said the other night that I shouldn't worry if he doesn't text me back because he just isn't into texting. However I sent him a text on sunday but he never replied back. Still this didn't bother me.

But while I was on facebook yesterday he went online for 15mins then he went offline but he liked something while he was offline so I was thinking maybe he appeared offline to me or else chat is f**ked! Also he did that same thing again a couple of weeks ago, he didn't bother to write to me first on facebook. However the first couple of times he did initiate the messages and then I decided to do it but he doesn't seem to write to me first as much but he still kept bringing up that he wanted to see me. Is it just because he doesn't feel like chatting at the time or he is just not that interested in me?? I really do think he is interested in me but I can't understand why he would not write to me first. He did say he does not like texting but isn't facebook messaging a lot different?? So do some guys just not like chatting sometimes or are not into texting which he did say to me??? Do you think he genuinely likes me?? Yes I know I had sex with him the first time but not all one night stands lead to nothing??
 

flashpoint

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guys are way less into this facebook stuff and sms texting. way way less than chicks. doesnt mean anything.

he came to see you, he bought the drinks, driving you around ... seems like he invests into this .... whatever it is right now. which means he likes you. or he is really desperate lol.

Just tell him how much you have enjoyed the time with him and the sex and that he is great in bed and so on. I'd say if he understands that his presence is very much appreciated he will find a way to make it happen more often. dont push him though. because otherwise there are two possible outcomes, either he withdraws or he becomes real clingy and needy. both are prolly not what you want.

and again to the question whether he genuinely likes you or not: what does your gut tell you? trust that.
 

GQ Scott

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Some guys like face to face over texting/facebook. If he's that kind of guy try calling him, it's better than text/FB imo, as I'm that kind of guy myself. He pays for your drinks and goes out of his way (distance/time) to see you, so he obviously puts in some effort to see you. He sounds busy and probably is seeing other girls though.

If you like him and want more you need to directly tell him this and ask what he wants, be it just sex or more. Nobody else can tell you that.
 

sassygirlie89

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If I am being perfectly honest it wasn't until yesterday when he was online and he never messaged me first and then went offline, that just annoyed me because I don't usually like to make the first move! My gut instinct tells me that he does like me but it is early days yet but we just seem to have this very strong attraction.
 

gpshields3

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Maybe he doesn't want to appear over-eager.

If you ever want to chat about these things, just know...I'm here for you.
 

Aristippus

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Hey Sassy. Sounds to me like he's putting time and effort into you so I wouldn't worry. As far as whether this could become something serious or will just be a fling, it's too early for you to be worrying about that. You've only seen each other twice.

Maybe worrying about whether it will be serious or not is just something you'll have to deal with and it's probably just a natural reaction that women have when they really like a guy. Women are pretty competitive when it comes to men (especially men they really like).

I know I don't like texting and I hate facebook with a passion (i do not have a Facebook account). I had texting disabled on my phone plan for a month and then had a plan with more minutes that automatically includes text messages. I don't use texting and didn't tell my woman or any of my friends that I can now receive text messages. As far as everyone knows, I can't receive text messages.

Just have fun and you'll be fine. If you want to talk, try picking up the phone and talking instead.
 

yuppaz

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You know...as a guy you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. If you contact first all tje time you are the chaser, and nobody likes being chased, you learn from expetience that women are wayyyyyy to fickle so it's better to keep a lot of distance in the beginning of things. He's just being cautious would be my guess. If he wants you to meet his friends thats a good sign. Just call him up if you want to talk to him.... And stop being fickle..haha
 

flashpoint

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sassygirlie89 said:
yesterday when he was online and he never messaged me first and then went offline, that just annoyed me
15 minutes. god knows what he was doing. it is really no big deal and most likely nothing personal. like others have said, just call him if you want to talk to him, or if that seems more convenient send him a text that he should call you when he has some time. tell him that you like hearing his voice or the like.
 

Zarky

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OP should be posting this on Loveshack.org.. Men responding to this thread should do nothing other than try to get OP to have sex with them ;)

Reminds me of MrSex4uNYC on ASF more than a decade ago. Every woman who posted on ASF he would run Speed Seduction lines on. LOL
 

Falfa

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OP can't read the writing on the wall and is set to descend further into stalkerdom.
 

sassygirlie89

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Hahhahaha very funny lol!! Ok I was just on facebook there and it happened again. He went online for a few mins, then went offline and then went online again for about ten mins and went offline again. Why is he doing this if he says he wants my friends and his friends to meet up??? I just don't get it!!!
 

yuppaz

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Ya, now your getting pretty stalkerish... Just call him you big vag.
 

mayfair

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Sounds to me like the guys just looking for some fun which can always possibly lead to more......

Chill out, you have only met the guy a couple of times and when you have hes showed you a good time. when you meet someone new alot of guys (me included) like to come across abit nonchalant

Rule 101 is dont go all stalkerish or bunny boiling on him or the chances are he will run for the hills! and youll be wondering where it all went wrong as you cry into your G&T

Hope this helps
 

sassygirlie89

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No he lives 40 mins away from the town where we met but he lives just over an hour away from my home place. It takes him 25 mins to drop me home from the town. So distance could be an issue too. He works every day as well so he couldn't possibly meet up with me during the week especially when he lives over an hour away from me. And as regards my looks, its got nothing to do with that at all concerning my issue with him not chatting to me first on facebook. Because I am good looking and he calls me gorgeous all the time and he did say that he would not come all the way from kilkenny just to meet up with anyone. So its got nothing to do with looks thats worrying me. However I am not a needy girl at all but I am worried that I may now be coming across that way. At first he would inititate the conversations on facebook and then I started doing it but only because I wanted to let him know I was interested as well. He said last saturday that he would give me a text later although I wasn't expecting him to because he told me in advance he isn't really into texting. He didn't text me that day so I just decided to give him a text on sunday and I sent the message twice straight after the first message because my phone is kinda f**ked and I thought the message might not have sent but it actually had. So maybe he thought that was kinda needy I dunno!! Because thats the only reason I can think of as to why he is not messaging me first on facebook. Is that being needy???
 

Greasy Pig

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Send him a nude selfie just to really fire up his loins. You don't have to show your face, just give him a sneak peek of what he can look forward to.
I can guarantee he'll be in his car heading to yours before you know it.
 

sassygirlie89

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No I am definitely not going to do that anyway smart ass! Maybe I am reading too much into this but I know I like him for more than just the sex but maybe he doesn't I am not sure. I was pretty sure he liked me for more than just the sex until he started not writing to me first on facebook. I don't think that is called being stalkerish when I notice he is not chatting to me first on facebook. I don't think any person would be too happy if the guy they like is not staying on facebook for any longer than 15 mins and has not bothered to write first. Maybe he is waiting for me to chat to him first but I have did the last 2 times besides him chatting to me first to let me know in advance that he couldn't make it down for the saturday but he would be able to go down the friday. Also his friends know that hes been with me the last few times as well. So at least he is not trying to hide me from his friends. I am just going to leave him text or chat to me first on facebook because I think I have done enough even though I haven't always messaged me first it has been kinda even but maybe I should wait and see what he does :)
 

flashpoint

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hm. if OP was a guy we most likely would say: NC & spin plates. actions speak louder than words. etc.

not sure tho if i would advice him to send a pic of his d1ck as a reminder in case the girl he is interested in seems to withdraw. :D
 
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