Do you Pay for First Dates?

[KirthWGersen]

More like to alot of us $10 to $20 isnt even worth the mental energy of thinking about it. I would only demand the girl pays if she is either rude or obviously not into me and we ran up a big drinks tab.

A coffee date is lame asf anyways. If im going out its going to be to have drinks and have fun.

You guys are seriously emitting some strong poverty energy in here. Most of my first dates always end in lays probably because i dont emit poor person energy like you guys lmao.

It is not about the money, which is irrelevant. It is about setting the right tone: valuing yourself, expecting reciprocity, not pandering, not putting women on a pedestal. I set the rules for my interactions, not wider society or entitled women.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

It is not about the money, which is irrelevant. It is about setting the right tone: valuing yourself, expecting reciprocity, not pandering, not putting women on a pedestal. I set the rules for my interactions, not wider society or entitled women.

yep, crying over 10-20 bucks is such strong frame lmao

 

[zinc4]

It is not about the money, which is irrelevant. It is about setting the right tone: valuing yourself, expecting reciprocity, not pandering, not putting women on a pedestal. I set the rules for my interactions, not wider society or entitled women.

You sound just like a feminist ffs

 

[bat soup]

There is no reason to not abide by the above Rule. If you invited her out on a one-on-one date, then you should pay, unless you agree with her otherwise (i.e. Dutch treat - I guess the Dutch are simply cheap-@$$es ).

No, the Dutch are smart. It´s American women that are simply cheap-@$$es and they are experts at taking advantage of dopey men.

 

[BadBoy89]

...would understand that the guy is in the lead, the date is him offering the woman an opportunnity to go on the journey that he has planned and will take her along with him (he is in charge). So of course he is paying for the meal,...it isn't even a question.

What if the man is a feminist, a champion for women’s rights and equal pay and opportunities for all women? His mission in life is to have all women be in positions of power, be sexually liberated and sleep with whom ever they wish without judgement.

Still pays?

 

[Bingo-Player]

Not read the entire thread but quite frankly the answer for me is no

i dont believe paying for her to be in your company sets a good precedent ( and usually encourages the wrong type of women)

The type of women whom i would seriously "date" would always offer to pay her way, then depending on how interested i am in her i will decide if i want too spoil her

treats for good behaviour are fine once you are at that stage with her, but imo first date is literally just two people deciding if they like each other i don't see why either party should foot the bill for something which will quite likely come to absolutely nothing

 

[PRW63]

Gold digger spotted

No. What she said defined her as the opposite.

 

[PRW63]

Not read the entire thread but quite frankly the answer for me is no

i dont believe paying for her to be in your company sets a good precedent ( and usually encourages the wrong type of women)

The type of women whom i would seriously "date" would always offer to pay her way, then depending on how interested i am in her i will decide if i want too spoil her

treats for good behaviour are fine once you are at that stage with her, but imo first date is literally just two people deciding if they like each other i don't see why either party should foot the bill for something which will quite likely come to absolutely nothing

Wow,...you really really just don't get it. The one who makes the offer, plans the date, and "funds" the date that they planned, is the one with the power, the one in control. You are destined to be the dominated hen-pecked guy following the woman who paid, tells you what to do, where to go, how to do it. She's paying, it's her money, she's the boss. But at least you don't have to pay for the stupid hamburger.

 

[SargeMaximus]

No. What she said defined her as the opposite.

White knight spotted

 

[PRW63]

White knight spotted

Riiiight.... Like you've never seen any of my posts that clearly define me as the complete opposite of that. I just tell the truth, and acknowledge the truth,...even if it just may have come from a woman at that particular moment. Even in your case,...we have debated in some threads,...and I've stood behind you and back you in other threads. With me is isn't about personality cults, or gender cults.

 

[SargeMaximus]

Riiiight.... Like you've never seen any of my posts that clearly define me as the complete opposite of that. I just tell the truth, and acknowledge the truth,...even if it just may have come from a woman at that particular moment. Even in your case,...we have debated in some threads,...and I've stood behind you and back you in other threads. With me is isn't about personality cults, or gender cults.

My bad. I’m in a “call it as I see it” mood recently. Not trying to cut you

 

[PRW63]

My bad. I’m in a “call it as I see it” mood recently. Not trying to cut you

Fair 'nuff

 

[KirthWGersen]

Wow,...you really really just don't get it. The one who makes the offer, plans the date, and "funds" the date that they planned, is the one with the power, the one in control. You are destined to be the dominated hen-pecked guy following the woman who paid, tells you what to do, where to go, how to do it. She's paying, it's her money, she's the boss. But at least you don't have to pay for the stupid hamburger.

I see it the complete opposite way. If you are paying for everything, you are debasing yourself in hopes of getting in the woman's good books. A confident, attractive man doesn't need to simp to get laid.

Paying doesn't put you in the superior, dominant position. It makes you the supplicator and her the prize.

 

[derby1]

I see it the complete opposite way. If you are paying for everything, you are debasing yourself in hopes of getting in the woman's good books. A confident, attractive man doesn't need to simp to get laid.

Paying doesn't put you in the superior, dominant position. It makes you the supplicator and her the prize.

totally agree, were not chasing chastity anymore. These women are out 3 times a week

 

[Zimbabwe]

Wow,...you really really just don't get it. The one who makes the offer, plans the date, and "funds" the date that they planned, is the one with the power, the one in control. You are destined to be the dominated hen-pecked guy following the woman who paid, tells you what to do, where to go, how to do it. She's paying, it's her money, she's the boss. But at least you don't have to pay for the stupid hamburger.

It's a flawed idea, since when do women make the plans? I'm sorry but this isn't the 1950s anymore, women are allowed to work and earn as much if not more than men.

Do you still ask her fathers permission to take her out as well?

Are you still trading 24 Pigs and an apple to have her hand in marriage?

 

[PRW63]

It's a flawed idea, since when do women make the plans? I'm sorry but this isn't the 1950s anymore, women are allowed to work and earn as much if not more than men.

Do you still ask her fathers permission to take her out as well?

Are you still trading 24 Pigs and an apple to have her hand in marriage?

That is just gaslighting and a misrepresentation of my position.

It is shocking how many here can't comprehend masculine leadership, accountability, and responsibility. They are like little boys that want no responsibility,...still get the fun,...think they are "owed" something, and want someone else to pay their way through life.

But if it were the 1950's western society would be solid healthy and functional rather then destroying itself via the after effects of the Sexual Revolution of the 1960's that came a decade after that.

 

[PRW63]

What if the man is a feminist,

Then he needs to stop being one.
He is part of the problem.

 

[Zimbabwe]

That is just gaslighting and a misrepresentation of my position.

It is shocking how many here can't comprehend masculine leadership, accountability, and responsibility. They are like little boys that want no responsibility,...still get the fun,...think they are "owed" something, and want someone else to pay their way through life.

But if it were the 1950's western society would be solid healthy and functional rather then destroying itself via the after effects of the Sexual Revolution of the 1960's that came a decade after that.

I wouldn't be complaining if this were the 1950s, most of us would be happily married now. My main problem is why are men like us still made to pay for dates when women these days do not cook,clean or even wear dresses?

The amount of heavy lifting men have to do in dating is way too high, look i get it that we are supposed to lead but is it too much to ask for women to put in some effort?

Most of us would have zero problems paying for dates, if women still acted feminine like 1950s women did.

 

[RSDCharlie]

That is just gaslighting and a misrepresentation of my position.

It is shocking how many here can't comprehend masculine leadership, accountability, and responsibility. They are like little boys that want no responsibility,...still get the fun,...think they are "owed" something, and want someone else to pay their way through life.

But if it were the 1950's western society would be solid healthy and functional rather then destroying itself via the after effects of the Sexual Revolution of the 1960's that came a decade after that.

You said it yourself "if it were" . If it were the 1950's and sexual revolution had not taken place and women didnt charge men with false accusations and metoo movement didnt take place and women didnt loot men for free dinners etc etc....then yes no issues with taking women on expensive dinners on the first date. But now that everything thats mentioned above already happened so women are seeing the consequences. No free dinners for them.

Chivalry is dead because women killed it

 

[Bingo-Player]

Wow,...you really really just don't get it. The one who makes the offer, plans the date, and "funds" the date that they planned, is the one with the power, the one in control. You are destined to be the dominated hen-pecked guy following the woman who paid, tells you what to do, where to go, how to do it. She's paying, it's her money, she's the boss. But at least you don't have to pay for the stupid hamburger.

We don't live in that world anymore , most women will have their own jobs , their own money , their own careers

I never said she should pay i said we split it , if i feel like treating her then fine that's my decision

What im not doing is abiding by some stupid archaic tradition that went out of style 20 years ago

Save the dominance for sexuality it serves absolutely no purpose t in modern society to try and financially dominate a woman unless of course you are rich and money is no object