By the way the train was absolutely packed
Approach three I am absolutely nervouse as hell there are two girls(looked close to my age the only ones who were for the day) next to me listening to an ipod one is wearing a bracelet that I think said puerto ricco which I have been 2 once .
M-What does your bracelet say (this was in the absolute worst tone/subcommmunication ever I do not think I could have been more creepy or nervouse sounding lol)
HB-Ignore
HB2-Taps her
HB-looks at me for half a second looks at her with EEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW **** off look on her face
Hb3 who wasn't originally part of set but was next to HB- Taps her feeling sorry for me to get her to reply
(I had repeated myself and tried to get her attention like 3 times at this point more and more nervously)
Hb-UUUUUHHHHH(If you were there you would of seen that the noise she made obviously translated into your a dumbass peace of ****) puerto ricco
M-OO I went there last summer (high pichted voice crak nervouseness)
HB1+HB2-Ignore after slight wtf expression at each other
M-Standing there for rest of train ride with no room so I am about and inch away from the 2 set right next to them with entire train staring at me with several of them laughing or stifling there laughter this lasted like 5-10 minutes intill my stop. I am sure the hbs were highly interested and my advanced pick up skills made her want to jump me so badly that she had to use her anti slut defense mechanism to the extreme to avoid makeing out on the spot.
Approach 4 I am now in a park after getting of the train it has been ahwile since my last approach (45 minutes maybe)
Hb sitting on bench reading a book.( she was mid twenties maybe 30 since she was asian and they tend to look a bit younger)
M-pretend to look at cover as i walk by which I can not see so well she ignored me but obivously new I was there and was pissed "what book is that"
HB-pissed off look on face + mean flat tone "middlesex" or something like that ( i know it had sex in the title and one other word maybe it was midnight sex or something lol) she goes back to reading
M-Oh (embarresed since she was all mean and I had loads of AA and it was like a porn novel) I saw the cover and it looked familiar (The title was in massive letters on the cover and It was obviouse I was lying or she may have thought I knew it was like a porn/romance novel and I was a creep.
after this I was totally out of it so I had to go slightly less direct I sat down next to girls and just said a comment and waited for a response I got none but a few shrugs from girls who I think didn't speak english. I was mad nervsouse from having an off day with terrible results so on a few approaches and couldn't do it and just asked where the bathroom was.
But I did have two decent approaches (sort of) There was a girl who I was to scared to approach with what I wanted to say (what are you reading) she was maybe an hb5.5 and looked younger than the rest but still probably in college or a freshman I think since she was doing what looked like homework and looked maybe 18.
I layed down on the grass a few feet away (there were people all over doing this tanning and what not as if it were a beach not like everyone was far apart and I was like on top of her) I decided not to approach after ahwile since it was soon after the middlesex girl and you saw how that went lol
So I was walking away totally relaxed since I decided not to approach and had no anticipation I really had to go to the bathroom so I though I'll at least get something out of this
M- "HEY!" loud to get attention due to ipod she sees my feet
AG(average girl)(from far away when I first decided I wanted to approach looked like a hb6.5)-Looks up really surprised and shocked in a positive way and looks sort of happy
M-Do you know if there is a bathroom around here?
AG- "oh" with disappointed look on her face "blah blah blah" (don't remember I think she didn't know)
M-"thanks"
I didn't realize this at first but this shows how subcommunications are so important. I have asked for bathroom directions ect. so often that it is second nature I am 100% relaxed when I do, espically after my 3rd-5th one or so of the day, it with no AA and I almost always get a good response if I don;t hesistate at all. If I am in a good mood the girl will even smile and they always seem dissapointed when I don't talk to them and instead ask for directions.
And the other one was when I was walking by a group of 3HBs maybe 20-24 yrs old on a bench stop for a second and take a step back to them (because I had such crap aprroaches that I took a break for ahwile just asking directions to a bathroom (I really had to go) I could have found it but I saw them and was like what the hell why not its practice.
M-Hey (similar to first one)
HBs- All look up giveing undivided unblinking attention when they were totally busy talking to each other. And one of them was haveing an in-depth convo on the phone and just says instantly hold on a second and moves the phone from her ear and stares at me (in a nice way though just giveing me all her attention)
M- ask about where bathroom is
HBs- give directions
I know its not 2 exciting but the good thing about it was that I realize that I have gotten so good at asking where the bathroom is or the time lol. Seriously once I transfer this to starting normal convos I am golded. When I say hey and am relaxed I get undivided attention serisously this was crazy it was like if brad pitt had said it and nothing else in the world mattered.
Final approach attempt #1 (the bathroom ones didn't count the rest were comments on the benches that got ignored dues to my horrifying sub communication from the crap approaches i was a little better because the bathroom ones gave me a small break)
I see an hb who likes a little like a more white version of middle sex girl lol so I don't do the approach I walk back looking at her hoping to get ec on this one since I didn't on all the rest and they sucked I get neutralish ec and start to turn to approach she starts to look pissed. I start to turn to keep walking we are still holding ec lol she looks a bit nicer so I turn again and walk towards her and her expression gets more pissed with each step lol I get right next to her on the bench and she looks really pissed so I just throw my hands up in a forget it motion turn around and walk away lmao.
Final approach attempt 2
Girl sitting down eating sald
M-nervously but not as horrifyingly bad as the rest since I was just like just do it and your done instead of all the pressure of all the approaches to come combined "Did you get that salad around here?'
HB-weird not happy reaction at all my worst before today but it seemed like being jumped compared to the rest "UUUM NO" your weird your dumb look I had received most of the day"I got it by some street (forgot what it was)
Ok so I feel a bit better now I was in a crap mood and only was focusing on the negative and forgot about when I asked for where the bathroom was which totaled around 5-6 times the reactions were neutral-slighly positve. Lat er that day I was so done with is but was real relaxed that it was over a girl in starbucks was checking me out with strong ec she was hot I was not nervouse in the slightest since it seemed so easy but I thought of approaching for a second and after that just ignored her because Its weird I had no nerves but just after all of those rejections and being mentally spent couldn't do it.
Its funny when I did the 20 for the first time I had put tons of pressure on myself just like I did today and at the end had two hbs approach me practicly throwing themselves at me and were talking to me when I was totally unresponsive due to exhaustion lol. how ironic especially since the whole day I had been asking girls if there name was blank (hypnotica uses this in coc) and they asked me if my name was jeremy or something which it isn't.
I am also thinking maybe in the future (not even thinking of planning on putting this amount of pressure on myself for ahwile since I noticed everytime I give a specific number the anticipation builds up more and more anxiety) could try telling myself I am going to ask where the bathroom is and then after I get there attention/positive reaction because of my good subcummunications say something else instead of that to start a convo.
Its weird I drew some stupid line for myself I have no problem asking hb10s for the time or directions if they think I really need them but as soon as I am talking about them or trying to start a convo even AGs make me nervouse because I can't think of stuff to say.
I was also thinking due to my horriying pickup lines (Like on subway "hey nice bag" wtf sounds like I am gonna mug her for the bag lol) I would try MM but I know the reason I say dumb stuff is because of my nervouseness and it is very rare but I have had some awesome convos with girls in my life that created attraction and at my best I can be super charasmatic so I know that it is in me I just need to learn how to get it out and keep it out in every situation. And I feel uncomfortable useing it so I know lines would come out incongruent (even though everything I say has come out incongruent) so if I did use it I would have to work that out.
But like I said I will stick with this for ahwile to see if I can get the real me (no fears shyness or stuck in head) out.
I don't think I will be doing any more approaches for ahwile because I have a huge summer assignment that I need to take care of and school starts really soon so I should have just enough time to get it done I am nervouse and excited to see how this effects me at school since I have seen not one person from the school the whole summer and will really get to see what the changes I have made can do for me.
