Dating site ettiquette

[SunnyD]

So I've been on Plentyoffish off and on for a few months. Haven't had any luck on there or met anyone off there. Just thought I'd try the online thing but it seems superficial and is not for me. I get mail and respond when I'm interested, if I'm not...I don't. Why waste my time and his time. That's the way I see it. No sense in engaging in useless chitchat. If I see something that turns me off, like "I just got out of an 8 year relationship, I have 2 kids that are my life and no time for fun because I work all the time.." or whatever..something that says "redflag" then I see no point in getting to know them.

Is this wrong? To just ignore msgs? I'm not being selective and picky, I give most a shot...but I just got a scathing msg from some guy I don't even remember getting a msg from, accusing me being a snob and full of myself and blah blah blah...because I am on 300 peoples favourites. I've never even had a conversation with this guy.

Haha! Wow, ok read this conversation..it just got funny:

Him:
its to bad you've let this site go to your head and now you think If you wait long enough brad pitt is gona email you lol, I have like 4 girl friends on here in the exact same boat as you,,they get so many emails and have way to many options that they'll never settle now cause they keep thinking they;ll meet the next hotter guy around the corner,,its to bad cause you prob werent such a snob before you started using this site,,hope you find what you're looking for , peace

Me:
Wtf are you talking about? Do I know you? You seem to think you know an awful lot about me and "what I'm looking for" and I don't think I've had a single conversation or gotten single message from you in my life.

Pretty presumptuous of you. No wonder you're on this site.

Him:
Ive only been on here like 3 weeks lol and im starting to realize most girls are on here to boost their egos not to actually meet anyone,,i know when i see someone with over 300 favorites though they've been on here a while,,why havnt you meet anyone? you enjoy the attention to much ,,,I did actually email you before as well and pretty much like all of your mail im sure, you didnt respond. Its funny how you write me back when you feel even the slightest bit insulted lol but wite me back when i actually sent to a nice email haha no way

Me:
Perhaps you were the one with the burned ego if you had to take time out of your day to send me a follow-up msg like that. I don't remember a msg from you and sorry if I didn't respond, I guess I wasn't interested and didn't want to waste my or yours time. Guess I made the right decision if someone is just going to msg me assuming they know what I'm all about, who I've met, why I'm here, and what I'm looking for.

Good luck to you.

Him:
actually you made a really bad decision lol, Im prob one of the best looking guys on here, I snowboard and wakeboard, Im super cool, i drive an 80 thousand dollar audi and own a boat haha good luck finding a better more fun guy than me..oh and the reason you didnt resond was cause you were so caught up opening your emails that your ego was through the roof and responding to anyone at that point was out of the question,,,and just so you know my egos grounded,,when somoene emails me thats around my age attractive and has some similar interests, I email them back cause im not that superficial that i can just look at a pic and decide if im gona like someone,,good luck to you as well

--
Are you kidding me????? Guys, this is NOT how to woo a woman ok...

Haha.

 

[LovelyLady]

"I own a boat " :crackup:

Rule #1 of internet dating for women: BEWARE THE BOAT MEN :crackup:

Seriously though, Sunny. I don't think men realize the volume of correspondence we navigate on these sites. If they were filtering out over a hundred emails a day, they might better understand how it just isn't possible to personally answer each one.

When my portrait is open, I do not feel obligated to respond to someone who has written me who OBVIOUSLY is not compatable (He wants 2 children - I don't want to have more kids... He says in his profile he wants a Christian woman - I am not a Christian. etc.) There is no obligation to respond to someone who hasn't taken time to evaluate on his own, IMO.

Nor is there a responsibility to respond to a wink (I delete those without even viewing their profiles), or a cut-n-paste email, IMO.

But if a guy does a genuine communication, I always respond in some kind of a way.

I have had several men get irate that they do not get the attention they feel they deserve - it's not that uncommon - I just block them - no communication at all - and just feel relieved I passed on them already and didn't waste my time and energy on them at all. Angry men are not attractive to me.

Just keep hitting the "block" feature - there are some very decent men out there, and you putting your portrait sends a "cosmic message" to the universe that you are open to having a relationship. Passing as soon as you know he is not the one for you is a good thing because it frees up his time to find the right woman (and of course your time to find a good partner too) Don't take it too personally when they freak - they do this sometimes online - just like in real life.

 

[MacAvoy]

I concur with the just ignoring. You should have also ignored the insulting email. Many guys do it to women in your position, for that exact reason, to get a stoke after being ignored.

I'm glad to see that your at least exploring new options. However I still think your too hung up on your ASD. Your too afraid to get out there and meet guys because you don't want your number to get too high.

The reality is, the only way your really going to get to know a guy well enough to make a decision about a LTR with him, is to get out there and date them and get this, SLEEP with them.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Im prob one of the best looking guys on here, I snowboard and wakeboard, Im super cool, i drive an 80 thousand dollar audi and own a boat haha good luck finding a better more fun guy than me

lmao @ Mister 'super cool.'

 

[JackPrescott]

So I've been on Plentyoffish off and on for a few months. Haven't had any luck on there or met anyone off there. Just thought I'd try the online thing but it seems superficial and is not for me. I get mail and respond when I'm interested, if I'm not...I don't. Why waste my time and his time. That's the way I see it. No sense in engaging in useless chitchat. If I see something that turns me off, like "I just got out of an 8 year relationship, I have 2 kids that are my life and no time for fun because I work all the time.." or whatever..something that says "redflag" then I see no point in getting to know them.

Is this wrong? To just ignore msgs? I'm not being selective and picky, I give most a shot...but I just got a scathing msg from some guy I don't even remember getting a msg from, accusing me being a snob and full of myself and blah blah blah...because I am on 300 peoples favourites. I've never even had a conversation with this guy.

Haha! Wow, ok read this conversation..it just got funny:

Him:
its to bad you've let this site go to your head and now you think If you wait long enough brad pitt is gona email you lol, I have like 4 girl friends on here in the exact same boat as you,,they get so many emails and have way to many options that they'll never settle now cause they keep thinking they;ll meet the next hotter guy around the corner,,its to bad cause you prob werent such a snob before you started using this site,,hope you find what you're looking for , peace

Me:
Wtf are you talking about? Do I know you? You seem to think you know an awful lot about me and "what I'm looking for" and I don't think I've had a single conversation or gotten single message from you in my life.

Pretty presumptuous of you. No wonder you're on this site.

Him:
Ive only been on here like 3 weeks lol and im starting to realize most girls are on here to boost their egos not to actually meet anyone,,i know when i see someone with over 300 favorites though they've been on here a while,,why havnt you meet anyone? you enjoy the attention to much ,,,I did actually email you before as well and pretty much like all of your mail im sure, you didnt respond. Its funny how you write me back when you feel even the slightest bit insulted lol but wite me back when i actually sent to a nice email haha no way

Me:
Perhaps you were the one with the burned ego if you had to take time out of your day to send me a follow-up msg like that. I don't remember a msg from you and sorry if I didn't respond, I guess I wasn't interested and didn't want to waste my or yours time. Guess I made the right decision if someone is just going to msg me assuming they know what I'm all about, who I've met, why I'm here, and what I'm looking for.

Good luck to you.

Him:
actually you made a really bad decision lol, Im prob one of the best looking guys on here, I snowboard and wakeboard, Im super cool, i drive an 80 thousand dollar audi and own a boat haha good luck finding a better more fun guy than me..oh and the reason you didnt resond was cause you were so caught up opening your emails that your ego was through the roof and responding to anyone at that point was out of the question,,,and just so you know my egos grounded,,when somoene emails me thats around my age attractive and has some similar interests, I email them back cause im not that superficial that i can just look at a pic and decide if im gona like someone,,good luck to you as well

--
Are you kidding me????? Guys, this is NOT how to woo a woman ok...

Haha.

Heres some advice if you want to score a male, for mating purposes.

1. Fish where the trout are. Go to kareokee clubs, nightclubs, bars, and Casinos. There are men out there cruising for sex, and relationships.

2. Make yourself presentable. Got a gym membership? Use it, no man loves chubby women. (Well, some do, but thats a different website) Spend time on the Treadmill, and the spinning classes. Utilize the free weights, and ask the trainers for advice. Lose weight, gain muscle tone, and SURELY use the tanning beds. As much as possible, a tanned, and fit woman has the same effect on a male, as Viagra.

3. Make yourself look feminine. The Nail Salon, the hair salon, and the mall, for clothes. Men love short shorts, mini shirts, tight, low riser jeans, with the red thong sticking out of the top. A couple of little tatts, above your ass, or on your foot wouldnt hurt matters, guys love that $hit. Wear heavy eyeliner, and a good color of lipstick. Take care of your feet, lots of closet foot fetish guys out there, and others like me, who dont hide it AT ALL!

4. Be receptive. Even to the geeks and nerds, but dont accept or give out numbers UNLESS you really want to date them. Every male on this Website has raw hatred for Flakes and Fakes. I wouldnt help a woman who flaked on me, if she was in a Back Alley getting raped and cried to me for help. I'd shout encouragement to her rapist, and get in my car, and drive to McDonalds for a Diet Coke.

5. Be friendly. U Attract bees with honey, not vinegar. More women would get laid if they remembered that.

 

[Mr. Me]

Is this wrong? To just ignore msgs? I'm not being selective and picky, I give most a shot...but I just got a scathing msg from some guy I don't even remember getting a msg from, accusing me being a snob

Just ignore. Those losers are using you to vent their frustrations about being losers.

I've read through their discussion forums and OMG the level of crassness, ignorance, immaturity, insecurity and stupidity is beyond belief! And they're mostly ugly too. And that's just the ones that post. It's NO wonder these people aren't in relationships.

I was very put off to Plentyoffish. Now I understand why: It's "Plenty Offish".

 

[Booblepook]

Anal Cruise!


Here is the deal. If I'm there, I'm not going to be browsing around and looking for women. I let women find me and contact me. Simply reason for that, my chances of meeting and ****ing a girl is slim if I contact her first. Must be the other way, she must contact me.


Thus, have you browsed the ads and found a real man and then contacted the guy?


Real men won't be messaging you. Only loosers will message you. Generally.



Sure you could have 500 friends, but how many of them would you ****? Ahhh?? Going by that you could be classified as a lonely looser.

 

[SickAgain]

I think the real question is why haven't you met anyone on there by now? I mean the girls on these sites get to be as picky as they want and out of 300 guys, not 1 you felt like meeting? I think the dude may be right in the sense you're looking for an ego boost.

On POF I wait 'til the 2nd or 3rd message to make it known that I'm not interested in an internet relationship and that if we aren't meeting up in person, it kills the point of the site. If they don't comply, I've just saved myself months perhaps waiting for the girl to come around.

You gotta realize the online dating thing is so saturated with guys its a buyers market for women. So what are you waiting for?

Although the guy is being an ******* accusing you of these things, he's ultimately looking for attention, frustrated, chumpish... I think I'm seeing a trend.

PS. Booblepook, you might want to try msging 1st once in a while. I've gotten more numbers and meeting through me contacting first. And usually those who make contact first are usually not my type and are fat.

 

[SunnyD]

I think the real question is why haven't you met anyone on there by now? I mean the girls on these sites get to be as picky as they want and out of 300 guys, not 1 you felt like meeting? I think the dude may be right in the sense you're looking for an ego boost.

On POF I wait 'til the 2nd or 3rd message to make it known that I'm not interested in an internet relationship and that if we aren't meeting up in person, it kills the point of the site. If they don't comply, I've just saved myself months perhaps waiting for the girl to come around.

You gotta realize the online dating thing is so saturated with guys its a buyers market for women. So what are you waiting for?

Although the guy is being an ******* accusing you of these things, he's ultimately looking for attention, frustrated, chumpish... I think I'm seeing a trend.

PS. Booblepook, you might want to try msging 1st once in a while. I've gotten more numbers and meeting through me contacting first. And usually those who make contact first are usually not my type and are fat.

I haven't met any of them because half the time they can't even make conversation other than "hi, how you doin?" Or they talk like "sup? U r hawt." I have msg'd back and forth with a couple, the ones I clicked with real well don't live in my town, they live 2 hours away. All the ones I've gotten msgs from in Toronto, I have had no desire of meeting in person.

Online dating is a tough thing..I think I'd rather just meet someone in person somewhere and skip and the crappy conversation.

 

[DonGorgon]

well clearly desperate men are every where including the net so this exchange does not surprise me at all...And the worse the shortage of women gets the more picky women get and the more desperate men get, its a vicious cycle

 

[MacAvoy]

How many men have you contacted? Its like anything else, if you wait for something to come to you, your not going to get your dream delivered to you on a silver platter.

Find the guys in Terana that interest YOU and start a conversation with them. You'll be able to tell them apart by their profiles.

Start being more outspoken, find a new circle of people to hang out and do stuff with. Get out of your comfort zone.

You might also be suffering from guys afraid of approaching because they assume that because your hot, that you automatically have a / several b/fs. The only way to combat that, is to get out there and take the bull by the horns.

 

[bigjohnson]

I love all these sosuave guys kissing your ass, I bet you love it too. As much as the guy sounds like a loser he does make a good point:


Why are you still looking after all this time?


Ponder that and get back if you want.

 

[DonGorgon]

I love all these sosuave guys kissing your ass, I bet you love it too.

That happens every where pretty women even not so pretty women go cause most of us men are desperate so we automatically put females on pedestals for special treatment...

 

[KontrollerX]

I love all these sosuave guys kissing your ass, I bet you love it too. As much as the guy sounds like a loser he does make a good point:


Why are you still looking after all this time?


Ponder that and get back if you want.

I view chicks that post here and support this site's overall message as "one of us".

Also I don't see anyone "kissing Sunny's ass" here but instead posters helping out "one of us".

 

[bigjohnson]

I view chicks that post here and support this site's overall message as "one of us".

Also I don't see anyone "kissing Sunny's ass" here but instead posters helping out "one of us".

Don't forget to gargle after.

She seems to be a nice girl but she's still engaging in classic approval and attention seeking female behavior, or seems to be. So far only one (I think) other response has tried to point that out and it needs to be pointed out.

 

[DonGorgon]

Don't forget to gargle after.

She seems to be a nice girl but she's still engaging in classic approval and attention seeking female behavior, or seems to be. So far only one (I think) other response has tried to point that out and it needs to be pointed out.

if we men were in the position women are in today we would do the same things so I dont hold it against her...

 

[KontrollerX]

LOL, with peroxide or salt water?

In anycase until Sunny makes a topic asking all of us "boys" how much we like the 32 pictures she posts for us of her in a thong on spring break or other topics of a similar nature I'm sticking to my guns and ruling her out as an attention wh0re or approval seeker.

Bottom line is you'd of had no issue with this topic if a guy posted the male equivalent to it.

 

[bigjohnson]

Bottom line is you'd of had no issue with this topic if a guy posted the male equivalent to it.

Anyone, male or female that tries something like this with no results is doing it wrong, but yes the advice would be different, as it should be.

 

[Lord Shinra]

4. Be receptive. Even to the geeks and nerds, but dont accept or give out numbers UNLESS you really want to date them. Every male on this Website has raw hatred for Flakes and Fakes. I wouldnt help a woman who flaked on me, if she was in a Back Alley getting raped and cried to me for help. I'd shout encouragement to her rapist, and get in my car, and drive to McDonalds for a Diet Coke.

AMEN BROTHER!
My ultimate hatred is for the "one and dones".

 

[penkitten]

wtf was he thinking buying an audi?
they always end up needing a new brain for the engine.