bigmil you might seriously consider major detachment. By that I mean stop initiating any contact, be polite short and indifferent when returning calls or emails. I believe it is the only healthy way to see this thru to an end.
For guys 100% intimacy is crucial in forming/maintaining any healthy relationship. And you know that because a lack of 100% intimacy brought you here right? For women, 100% physical & emotional security is crucial. And clearly, there needs to be reciprocal desire in both.
I want to re-iterare what I originally wrote that I did not say that "she is slvtty beyond normal", rather my words were "feels way beyond normal slvtty". There's a big difference. If she was mega-slvtty, you'd have nailed her 4 months ago lost interest and moved on. On the other hand if something has her continually *feeling* mega-slvtty, well best of luck to ya!
Nope, day by day your allowing yourself to get wrapped up in a mind fvcking conundrum. You've treated her good (ie. physical security) and you haven't wigged out on her or judged her (emotional security). You desire her and have communicated that to her in whatever way you feel is right. She on the other hand, upon receiving your attention, physical security and non-judgemental emotional stability HAS NOT / CAN NOT / WILL NOT reciprocate. There is some type of barrier.
And here's the important part. That barrier is her's and her's alone to deal with, cope with and possibly break down one day. Probing, pushing, waiting, helping, saving, rescuing - anything on your part other than detachment - may very well make things even worse.
You seem to be thinking logically now, that's awesome. A heavy dose of detachment is actually a win-win scenario:
1.) If she falls out of your life, you'll know that she never could or would provide you the level of intimacy required to sustain a healthy relationship. Also, you may never have the answer to the mind fvcking conundrum (ie. what was the barrier) however every day moving on & forward will quickly make that mystery insignificant amongst your thoughts.
2.) She might miss your attention, seek intimacy and either reciprocate as you need or not. If not, simply detach again (after getting a good hummer of course
![Smile :) :)](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
). And if she does go all the way, then know it was possible and gosh knows what would possibly come of it (I definitely wouldn't bet on that long shot).
3.) She may finally confront you regarding your detachment. Tell her quite simply and in this case rather directly/overtly that for you, complete intimacy is necessary for healthy relationships to succeed. Don't explain why. Don't give a timetable. Actually, say nothing else at all (as in don't argue, supplicate, agree, "talk it out", etc.) Then indifferently end the conversation and let it stew in her. She'll dissappear and eventually you might get the answer to your mystery. However, tread carefully because the answer you get will probably be at best a half-truth. In either case, she'll respect you because you stand your ground and are letting her deal with it her way (ie you're not trying to rescue/save).
I just remembered something funny about the similar situation I mentioned earlier. She used to call it something like friendship sex or something stupid like that. Keep in mind, this was somehow different than FWB/FB because there was a partial intimacy barrier. It was as if a friendship had progressed into this "void" zone between standard friendship and standard relationship. Like your case, the barrier was never explained. All that matters was that it existed and the best course of action was to simply head in a new different direction. In the end I figured she "felt slvtty" for getting intimate when she knew deep down there was a reason (ie a past trauma, lack of desire, etc) that a full relationship could never work, yet she worried the friendship would end if intimacy needed to end. And thus a very bizarre unhealthy partially intimate relationship. Yet another great reason why men shouldn't allow women to run a relationship and why friendship with women generally ends negatively if any attraction is present.