Converting Girl Friends into 'Girlfriends' Painlessly

[Johnny Soporno]

I ran this by a giggle of girlfriends who ALL, UNIFORMLY agreed with me - but this ONLY works with REAL friendships... not girls whom you've only befriended because you couldn't get them to sleep with you....

Here goes:
Women want to have fun.
Women love to have sex!

This may include Recreational-Only Sex with MEN THEY KNOW THEY CAN TRUST!

Naturally, anyone they consider truly a friend would fall into that category - BUT NO ONE WANTS TO RISK LOSING A FRIEND!

Therefore most women won't chance beginning a sexual relationship where there is currently a solid friendship.
THEREFORE IT IS ESSENTIAL that the girl understands she absolutely won't lose your friendship either way, and that
YOU ARE OFFERING HER SOMETHING - NOT ASKING FOR ANYTHING!

The decision is ALWAYS in her court.

Most women have learned the hard-way that IF they sleep with a guy whom they respect, appreciate, and admire - BUT ARE NOT OVERLY TURNED ON BY - it will end badly, when the guy begins to wish to become their 'Boyfriend'. They will lose their opportunity to be 'Just Friends' with that guy once things sort themselves out, because HIS ego will be bruised and he won't be able to forgive her for the 'rejection' he feels.

IF YOU COMMUNICATE TO A FEMALE FRIEND IN NO UNCERTAIN TERMS:

A ) YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN BEING HER BOYFRIEND, nor do you want her as 'your Girlfriend' -- 'cuz while the respect/friendship/admiration is there in abundance, the chemistry isn't a fit - there's no 'Romantic Crush' aspect for how you feel about her - Just true, real, justifiable appreciation, and that's enough!

B ) YOU ARE ALREADY HER FRIEND which makes her much more important and interesting than just someone you'd like to have sex with - and you wouldn't change that for the world; BUT.... You are a boy, and she is a girl, and that's a nice arrangement.

Try saying something like this to her: "You know I would NEVER fcuk-you-over; ...But I'd gladly fcuk you over-and-over!"
(I have used this line for a decade with fantastic success - it's light and cute and funny and reassuring all at once)

C) YOU DEFINATELY DON'T WANT TO INTERFERE WITH HER PURSUIT OF 'MR. RIGHT' nor would you stop pursuing and sleeping with other girls... in fact, you'd appreciate any pointers or suggestions which would help your Game, and of course you'll be more than happy to hook her up with new guys you think might suit her...

D) YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE THIS WITH HER - and there's truly no urgency at all - nothing will change between you either way; at least, not negatively ...but you know you'd be a fool not to let her know that you'd enjoy having friendly-fun-without-strings with her, and that she can rely upon you for non-judgemental acceptance.

That last bit, the 'non-judgemental acceptance', is a FANTASTIC OFFER for any woman. It guarantees her the security she craves, and relaxes the fears she may have about her reputation's being damaged by her taking you up on your offer...

You are offering her a 'FREE PASS' - because YOU WON'T COUNT!
When she considers the number of guys she'll admit to having 'been with' - SHE WON'T 'COUNT' YOU - You're her FRIEND!
There's no 'romance' there, no chance of a 'serious relationship', and no need to write-about you in her diary... YOU SIMPLY WON'T COUNT!

REMEMBER, that's what's happening here: YOU ARE OFFERING HER SOMETHING SHE WANTS, and at a price she can afford!
(ie, fun sex with someone who will stick around, be loyal (though not exclusive!) and trustworthy, and IS her friend-for-real.)

My comfort in this Frame, the notion that WOMEN LOVE SEX, and would have lots more of it if they felt confident that their partners weren't going to disappear OR become Cling-ons, is absolute.

One caveat, again - YOU CAN ONLY OFFER THIS IF YOU TRULY WILL REMAIN FRIENDS WITH THE GIRL, EITHER WAY:

She might not immediately accept your offer; she might not agree for months, or until someone she's seeing flakes on her, breaks up with her, or whatever; or maybe NEVER. But if you are SINCERE, and nothing changes either way between you, you will rise in her esteem and SHE WILL consider it, subconciously as well as conciously.

If you are faking, if you change your behaviour towards her once you make the offer, if you are trying to GET HER rather than offer yourself TO HER, she'll sniff it out, and you'll seriously drop in her estimation. Maybe costing you the friendship.

Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy
"The Man Who Didn't Count"

 

[Playboy]

I ran this by a giggle of girlfriends who ALL, UNIFORMLY agreed with me - but this ONLY works with REAL friendships... not girls whom you've only befriended because you couldn't get them to sleep with you....

Here goes:
Women want to have fun.
Women love to have sex!

This may include Recreational-Only Sex with MEN THEY KNOW THEY CAN TRUST!

Naturally, anyone they consider truly a friend would fall into that category - BUT NO ONE WANTS TO RISK LOSING A FRIEND!

Therefore most women won't chance beginning a sexual relationship where there is currently a solid friendship.
THEREFORE IT IS ESSENTIAL that the girl understands she absolutely won't lose your friendship either way, and that
YOU ARE OFFERING HER SOMETHING - NOT ASKING FOR ANYTHING!

The decision is ALWAYS in her court.

Most women have learned the hard-way that IF they sleep with a guy whom they respect, appreciate, and admire - BUT ARE NOT OVERLY TURNED ON BY - it will end badly, when the guy begins to wish to become their 'Boyfriend'. They will lose their opportunity to be 'Just Friends' with that guy once things sort themselves out, because HIS ego will be bruised and he won't be able to forgive her for the 'rejection' he feels.

IF YOU COMMUNICATE TO A FEMALE FRIEND IN NO UNCERTAIN TERMS:

A ) YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN BEING HER BOYFRIEND, nor do you want her as 'your Girlfriend' -- 'cuz while the respect/friendship/admiration is there in abundance, the chemistry isn't a fit - there's no 'Romantic Crush' aspect for how you feel about her - Just true, real, justifiable appreciation, and that's enough!

B ) YOU ARE ALREADY HER FRIEND which makes her much more important and interesting than just someone you'd like to have sex with - and you wouldn't change that for the world; BUT.... You are a boy, and she is a girl, and that's a nice arrangement.

Try saying something like this to her: "You know I would NEVER fcuk-you-over; ...But I'd gladly fcuk you over-and-over!"
(I have used this line for a decade with fantastic success - it's light and cute and funny and reassuring all at once)

C) YOU DEFINATELY DON'T WANT TO INTERFERE WITH HER PURSUIT OF 'MR. RIGHT' nor would you stop pursuing and sleeping with other girls... in fact, you'd appreciate any pointers or suggestions which would help your Game, and of course you'll be more than happy to hook her up with new guys you think might suit her...

D) YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE THIS WITH HER - and there's truly no urgency at all - nothing will change between you either way; at least, not negatively ...but you know you'd be a fool not to let her know that you'd enjoy having friendly-fun-without-strings with her, and that she can rely upon you for non-judgemental acceptance.

That last bit, the 'non-judgemental acceptance', is a FANTASTIC OFFER for any woman. It guarantees her the security she craves, and relaxes the fears she may have about her reputation's being damaged by her taking you up on your offer...

You are offering her a 'FREE PASS' - because YOU WON'T COUNT!
When she considers the number of guys she'll admit to having 'been with' - SHE WON'T 'COUNT' YOU - You're her FRIEND!
There's no 'romance' there, no chance of a 'serious relationship', and no need to write-about you in her diary... YOU SIMPLY WON'T COUNT!

REMEMBER, that's what's happening here: YOU ARE OFFERING HER SOMETHING SHE WANTS, and at a price she can afford!
(ie, fun sex with someone who will stick around, be loyal (though not exclusive!) and trustworthy, and IS her friend-for-real.)

My comfort in this Frame, the notion that WOMEN LOVE SEX, and would have lots more of it if they felt confident that their partners weren't going to disappear OR become Cling-ons, is absolute.

One caveat, again - YOU CAN ONLY OFFER THIS IF YOU TRULY WILL REMAIN FRIENDS WITH THE GIRL, EITHER WAY:

She might not immediately accept your offer; she might not agree for months, or until someone she's seeing flakes on her, breaks up with her, or whatever; or maybe NEVER. But if you are SINCERE, and nothing changes either way between you, you will rise in her esteem and SHE WILL consider it, subconciously as well as conciously.

If you are faking, if you change your behaviour towards her once you make the offer, if you are trying to GET HER rather than offer yourself TO HER, she'll sniff it out, and you'll seriously drop in her estimation. Maybe costing you the friendship.

Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy
"The Man Who Didn't Count"

Very interesting Johnny.

How do you communicate all of these points? Is it subcommunicated or directly communicated with a logical conversation?

If it is subcommunicated can we get some examples on how one might go about doing that?

I mean these days I come off as a sexual being, a bit too ****y at times, and definately a guy that no girl will usually get involved with unless she is looking to get laid. However there are sometimes situations with girls that are friends not looking to complicate things, girls who actually get to know the real me and who for whatever reason have other prospects or circumstances in their life that have prevented us from hooking up. So this intriques me, it might be a way for me to tone down my highly sexual and sometimes overly presumptious and arrogant game as well.

 

[DonJuan11]

Thread is a little confusing but I agree with most of it EXCEPT the part that says women love sex. That's a joke and a half.

 

[Playboy]

Thread is a little confusing but I agree with most of it EXCEPT the part that says women love sex. That's a joke and a half.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?!??!?!?!?

Dude girls Love sex, thats why they are the ones moaning and screaming. I have been told personally by chicks that they like sex more than we do. I cant believe there is anyone left in this community that does not realize that.

 

[Smooth_Mcfly]

you have very interesting theory, johnny. i would also like to know how you communicated your "offer" to her. It seems too rational, for the irrational creature, that is woman.

 

[Playboy]

you have very interesting theory, johnny. i would also like to know how you communicated your "offer" to her. It seems too rational, for the irrational creature, that is woman.

Exactly. That is what I am saying, I want to know exactly how he is getting this message across because it seems like a very complex message.

 

[Smooth_Mcfly]

hey Donjuan11

yeah again I would have to agree with playboy, girls love having sex, way more then men, hell they can have at least three different types of orgasms. I have many girlfriends and they all tell me how much they love sex, it is all we really talk about when we hangout ( and i have personally slept with many of them). maybe girls just don't love having sex with you

 

[comic_relief]

interesting tip

Must say that i will try it whenever I become single again

comic_relief

 

[DonJuan11]

yeah again I would have to agree with playboy, girls love having sex, way more then men, hell they can have at least three different types of orgasms. I have many girlfriends and they all tell me how much they love sex, it is all we really talk about when we hangout ( and i have personally slept with many of them). maybe girls just don't love having sex with you

I don't know dude, I've made the hot girls moan very loudly too but they have never told me they like sex more than men. They tell me they enjoy it but only a few times here and there, but no way more than men. They actually complain that guys think about sex all the time and can never get enough from them, bugs the hell out of them. Please don't say "you're not doing it right, you're not doing it right." I've had them scream so loud that I've covered their mouths to not annoy the neighbours. I would take what the girls you know say with a grain of salt.

Here's a simple analogy for you one girl told me: For a guy it takes 5 seconds to get ready for sex and for a girl it can take up to 5 hours to get ready for sex. If you and a girl are equally thirsty and both want a Pespi, you get yours in 5 seconds at the store and she takes 5 hours to think about it and then gets one at the store, who wants the Pepsi more?

 

[comic_relief]

*warning I'm drunk right now*

I don't know dude, I've made the hot girls moan very loudly too but they have never told me they like sex more than men. They tell me they enjoy it but only a few times here and there, but no way more than men. They actually complain that guys think about sex all the time and can never get enough from them, bugs the hell out of them. Please don't say "you're not doing it right, you're not doing it right." I've had them scream so loud that I've covered their mouths to not annoy the neighbours. I would take what the girls you know say with a grain of salt.

Here's a simple analogy for you one girl told me: For a guy it takes 5 seconds to get ready for sex and for a girl it can take up to 5 hours to get ready for sex. If you and a girl are equally thirsty and both want a Pespi, you get yours in 5 seconds at the store and she takes 5 hours to think about it and then gets one at the store, who wants the Pepsi more?

My girlfriend just ripped my clothes even though I didn't feel like I was really wanting anything.

Your example is flawed. That is just called indecisive.

Personally, the secret to getting a girl hot is to get her wanting it more than you.

Just let her sweat for TWENTY minutes.
First five minutes - haha, he won't get any at all.
Ten Minutes - alright, he is holding out
Fifteen minutes - whats going on
Twenty Minutes - I want him NOW!!!

That is how me and any other girl that i have been with has been. You just need to outwait them.

Women are like a crock pot (long to warm up but doesn't cool down for an exceptionally long time). Men are like bottle rockets (very quick with a nice feel good feeling).

I have a handy tool on my person. It's called patience and believe me my girlfriend hates it.

comic_relief

 

[jamescr73]

learn the art of anticipation. anticipation is half of the fun for women. no girl just wants a slam-o-rama, well maybe sometimes.

 

[Playboy]

I don't know dude, I've made the hot girls moan very loudly too but they have never told me they like sex more than men. They tell me they enjoy it but only a few times here and there, but no way more than men. They actually complain that guys think about sex all the time and can never get enough from them, bugs the hell out of them. Please don't say "you're not doing it right, you're not doing it right." I've had them scream so loud that I've covered their mouths to not annoy the neighbours. I would take what the girls you know say with a grain of salt.

Here's a simple analogy for you one girl told me: For a guy it takes 5 seconds to get ready for sex and for a girl it can take up to 5 hours to get ready for sex. If you and a girl are equally thirsty and both want a Pespi, you get yours in 5 seconds at the store and she takes 5 hours to think about it and then gets one at the store, who wants the Pepsi more?

If only this guy knew how much he sounds like a virgin right now. It's funny stuff. You only find this stuff on a forum for picking up girls. lol. Hilarious.

The other advice you get, isn't always polarizing but whenever I read sex advice on any pickup forum it really opens my eyes to how little experience some of these guys have and how off base some of the advice is. 5 hours? Dude your either a virgin or close to it.

For those of you reading, let me use this guy for an example. You may be able to get away with KJing cold approach pickup advice, but if your not experienced in the bedroom dont try to make it out like you are cause you just look pathetic to those of us with sexual experience.

 

[Infamous J]

George: What's the deal with Aquaman? Could he go on land, or was he just restricted to water?

Jerry: No, I think I saw him on land a couple times. So how's the job situation goin'?

George: Still lookin'. It's pretty bad out there. What about you?

Jerry: Nothin' much. I slept with Elaine last night.

George: Oxygen! I need some oxygen! This is major.

Jerry: I thought you'd like that.

George: Oh, this is huge!

Jerry: I know.

George: All right, okay. Let's go, details.

Jerry: No, I can't do details.

George: You wha?

Jerry: I can't give details.

George: No details?

Jerry: I'm not in the mood.

George: You ask me to have lunch, tell me you slept with Elaine, and then say you're not in the mood for details. Now you listen to me. I want details and I want them right now. I don't have a job, I have no place to go. You're not in the mood? Well you get in the mood!

Jerry: All right, okay. We're in the apartment watching TV.

George: Where are you sitting?

Jerry: On the couch.

George: Next to each other?

Jerry: No, separated.

George: Time?

Jerry: About eleven.

George: Okay, go ahead.

Jerry: So she's flipping around the TV, and she gets to the naked station.

George: Oh, see? that's why I don't have cable in my house. Because of that naked station. If I had that in my house, I would never turn it off. I wouldn't sleep, I wouldn't eat. Eventually, firemen would have to break through the door, they'd find me sitting there in my pajamas with drool coming down my face. All right, all right. So you're watching the naked station.

Jerry: And then, somehow, we started talking about, what if we had sex.

George: Boy, these are really bad details.

Jerry: It pains me to say this, but I may be getting to mature for details.

George: Oh I hate to hear this. That kind of growth really irritates me.

Jerry: Well. I'll tell you though. It was really passionate.

George: Better than before?

Jerry: She must've taken some kind of seminar or something.

George: This is all too much. So what are you feeling? What's going on? Are you like a couple again now?

Jerry: Not exactly.

George: Not exactly. What does that mean?

Jerry: Well, we've tried to arrange a situation where we'll be able to do this once in a while and still be friends. (George laughs hysterically and stands out of his seat)

George: Where are you living? Are you here? Are you on this planet? It's impossible. It can't be done.
(He sits back down) Thousands of years people have been trying to have their cake and eat it too. So all of a sudden the two of you are going to come along and do it. Where do you get the ego? No one can do it. It can't be done.

Jerry: I think we've worked out a system.

George: Oh, you know what you're like? You're like a pathetic gambler. You're one of those losers in Las Vegas who keeps thinking he's gonna come up with a way to win at blackjack.

Jerry: No, this is very advanced. We've designed at set of rules that we can maintain the friendship by advancing all of the relationship pitfalls.

George: Sure, all right. Tell me the rules.

Jerry: Okay. No calls the next day.

George: (To himself) So you're havin' the sex, next day you don't have to call. That's pretty good. (Back to Jerry) Go ahead.

Jerry: You ready for the second one?

George: I have tell you, I'm pretty impressed with the first one.

Jerry: Spending the night. Optional.

George: No, you see? You got greedy.

Jerry: No, that's the rule. It's optional.

George: I know less about women than anyone in the world. But one thing I do know is they're not happy if you don't spend the night. It could be a hot, sweaty room with no air conditioning and all they have is a little army cot this wide (Displays with French fry) You're not going anywhere.

Jerry: I think you're wrong.

George: I hope I am.

The Deal

 

[Johnny Soporno]

you have very interesting theory, johnny. i would also like to know how you communicated your "offer" to her. It seems too rational, for the irrational creature, that is woman.

Exactly. That is what I am saying, I want to know exactly how he is getting this message across because it seems like a very complex message.

Have you never had actual, legitimate female FRIENDS before?

In my experience, women are not NEARLY so irrational as you assert, McFly - (excepting during hormone-induced PMS moments) and they do appreciate and understand the following four concepts VERY clearly and well:

A ) YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN BEING HER "BOYFRIEND", nor do you want her as 'your Girlfriend' -- 'cuz while the respect/friendship/admiration is there in abundance, the chemistry isn't a fit - there's no 'Romantic Crush' aspect for how you feel about her - Just true, real, justifiable appreciation, and that's enough!

This is an idea which can be expressed EXACTLY in this way, but if you feel you need to add more to it, feel free - but be careful not to OVERSELL. This must be regarded by her as AN OFFER, not a ploy.

B ) YOU ARE ALREADY HER FRIEND which makes her much more important and interesting than just someone you'd like to have sex with - and you wouldn't change that for the world; BUT.... You are a boy, and she is a girl, and that's a nice arrangement.

This is ALSO clear as could be, and self-contained. I recommend NOT saying much more on this subject, for the same reasons as above.

C) YOU DEFINITELY DON'T WANT TO INTERFERE WITH HER PURSUIT OF 'MR. RIGHT' nor would you stop pursuing and sleeping with other girls... in fact, you'd appreciate any pointers or suggestions which would help your Game, and of course you'll be more than happy to hook her up with new guys you think might suit her...

This is a powerful message - it tells her you're planning to "not count" - you don't want to have any negative impact on either her 'market value' nor on her freedom.

D) YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE THIS WITH HER - and there's truly no urgency at all - nothing will change between you either way; at least, not negatively ...but you know you'd be a fool not to let her know that you'd enjoy having friendly-fun-without-strings with her, and that she can rely upon you for "non-judgemental acceptance".

Again, this leaves her with (likely) and unprecedented opportunity to have recreational, playful sex (including things she's ALWAYS wanted to try, but would never consider attempting with her 'Boyfriend' because she'd be unwilling to risk it, or expects to be hurt just to witness it, such as threesomes with other girls!) with someone SHE TRUSTS and who's ON HER SIDE.

Fellas, consider this:

Women DO love sex, and their BIGGEST complaint is the shortage of worthwhile guys...

So what do they do? They have meaningless sex when they get horny with guys whom they know they can discount afterwards.

Here's a hypothetical conversation between me and any random female friend:

Johnny: How's things with you, Karen?

Karen: Meh... I'm bored and frustrated... I'm REALLY glad I ditch Gary, but it's been awful since then. I haven't had sex in 5 months!

Johnny: Wait a sec... what about that guy you went home with from that club that night? (NOTE: I don't know of any such guy - but every girl will have some number of these - ask your female friends about this!)

Karen: Him? That didn't count, we just had oral and anal... and I gave him a phony number.

​

Women 'equivocate' - they alter the MEANING of the word 'SEX' so they can escape feeling badly for being 'too easy'.

Help them out - give them another option! YOU!

Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy

 

[potato]

Very interesting Johnny.

How do you communicate all of these points? Is it subcommunicated or directly communicated with a logical conversation?

If it is subcommunicated can we get some examples on how one might go about doing that?

This is a consistency with Johnny Soporno. He gives out this advice that looks as though he’s put a lot of thought into it and it seems reasonable enough, yet he never is quite able to show the details of how it works.

Just as you called out DonJuan11 on his apparent lack of understanding of women's sexuality, Johnny seems to also have an understanding of women that falls short of the level that his presenting himself as an expert would suggest.

It’s like his “Stripper Fu” and advice on how to handle multiple girlfriends. On the surface it seems plausible, especially to the uninitiated, but to someone who regularly lives these experiences, he comes off as lacking.

 

[Playboy]

This is a consistency with Johnny Soporno. He gives out this advice that looks as though he’s put a lot of thought into it and it seems reasonable enough, yet he never is quite able to show the details of how it works.

Just as you called out DonJuan11 on his apparent lack of understanding of women's sexuality, Johnny seems to also have an understanding of women that falls short of the level that his presenting himself as an expert would suggest.

It’s like his “Stripper Fu” and advice on how to handle multiple girlfriends. On the surface it seems plausible, especially to the uninitiated, but to someone who regularly lives these experiences, he comes off as lacking.

Well I believe that he does live the lifestyle, I mean he certainly has the access to it.

I just was trying to figure out how he communicates these things to the girl. I can only conclude from what he has said that he flat out has a logical conversation with the girl and is actually SAYING these things instead of sub-communicating them, that it is an actual "deal" or "scenario" much like in the seinfeld episode that was posted up.

The problem I have with this is two-fold. Number one it seems like a very weak fallback plan to a situation that can be avoided by being sexual from the get-go. Of course this is probably meant as a last resort type of thing that he tells the girls with no attachment or outcome needed.

Second I would wonder when the time to bring something up like this is, is it after she rejects a sexual advance? Is it proposed randomly and out of the blue?

Thirdly it is a well known theory that seems to have proved itself very solid to me when I look back on my experiences that you can't logically talk a woman into sleeping with you.

I would think that you would be better off in a situation like this getting her use to you touching her or cuddling with her and looking to get her horny, and when she tries to slow it down assuring her that the two of you arn't going to have sex, and turning her on to the point where she WANTS it.

Laying it out logically on the table like this would seem like a easy way for her to draw up even more solid boundaries.

Anyways thats just my evaluation based off of what Johnny has told us. It's a very non-community perspective for sure, not that the community has all the answers but women are emotional creatures not logical ones and this just seems awfully weird to me. I certainly have the maturity to handle a deal like this, but I see it as a last resort. I hardly think it is a reason to drop all community theory and become every womans friend and then have a logical discussion with them, I fail to see how this could work out for an abundant sex life -- even if your not attached to the outcome.

 

[potato]

It’s not that I doubt the lifestyle he leads; I just think that he is not being forthcoming with what is really going on. That is why you don’t see the details that back up what he is saying. Hugh Hefner doesn’t have three girlfriends because he is a wonderful guy, sexually attractive, a great lover, or understands women. He has three women who want the lifestyle of living in luxury.

I have many friends who are women who I’m sure are sexually attracted to me. To go from being just friends to lovers requires little more than setting up the situation for it to happen – just going for it as I would any other woman that I would be interested in. There is no need to discus it. There have been women who I have had sex with and afterwards continued on as just friends. It is not an issue.

The only time such a discussion would be necessary is in those cases where it is better off not to become lovers. For instance my doctor is female, is part of my social circle, and there is a great deal of sexual tension between us. However I very much value her as my doctor. We’ve had discussions and have agreed to not to let anything happen between us. I have a simular agreement with my brother’s wife.

What seems to be a consistent pattern in Johnny’s line is that rather than approaching a woman sexually, using his male sexuality, he seems to just sit back and tell the girl, “if you don’t find anybody else you can always come to me.” In a way it is almost as if he is just finding girls who regularly give it away freely and stands at the end of the line and waits for her to run out of other lovers.

 

[lildevil]

Why is does this thread make Afc posters ..... go so Wild for i guess is the need for some painkillers....people like been with girls....that they can't....


HEY All U LOSERS GO FIND SOMEONE ELSE....She has never LIKE YOU and most likely never will....keep ON WITH YOUR Lives....wouldn't you think ...she would have said yes...... the first time(no offence to the ones who think this way... by the way...hahaha)

 

[Johnny Soporno]

Well I believe that he does live the lifestyle, I mean he certainly has the access to it.

Thanks for noticing

I just was trying to figure out how he communicates these things to the girl. I can only conclude from what he has said that he flat out has a logical conversation with the girl and is actually SAYING these things instead of sub-communicating them, that it is an actual "deal" or "scenario" much like in the seinfeld episode that was posted up.

Absolutely NO sub-communication is required, and also no subterfuge.

This paradigm is EXPLICITLY for GENUINE, LEGITIMATE FRIENDS who happen to be attractive females. It is not 'Game', it is not a 'seduction technique' - it is a special gift you can give to your 'Y Chromosome Deficient' buddies, which pays off for both of you.

The problem I have with this is two-fold. Number one it seems like a very weak fallback plan to a situation that can be avoided by being sexual from the get-go. Of course this is probably meant as a last resort type of thing that he tells the girls with no attachment or outcome needed.

It's NOT a fallback plan!

Let me restress, THIS IS FOR GENUINE FRIENDSHIPS ONLY - it's not meant for last-ditch recoveries when you've been shot-down and relegated to the 'Friend-Zone', it's for girls whom you've grown to appreciate who were happily married when you met, or whom you met while YOU were happily in some exclusive LTR, or were your boss, your employee, or otherwise inappropriate for dating, and since meeting them you've developed a worthwhile friendship.

Second I would wonder when the time to bring something up like this is, is it after she rejects a sexual advance? Is it proposed randomly and out of the blue?

DEFINITELY NOT anywhere near a failed sexual advance!

This is for offering to women when you know that they are in the market, but you ALSO know that you're not what they envision when they imagine their ideal man - be it because you're a well-known philanderer, or because they prefer a taller-man, or because you're the wrong religion, or the wrong economic class, or for whatever other reason she doesn't see you as someone she would consider as 'her Boyfriend'.

Thirdly it is a well known theory that seems to have proved itself very solid to me when I look back on my experiences that you can't logically talk a woman into sleeping with you.

Of course not. This isn't about persuading her to fcuk you, it's about alerting her to that you are OFFERING YOURSELF TO HER as a no-risk, no-cost Playmate, someone whom she doesn't need to 'count' in her total number of partners - she isn't going to talk about you to her mom, she's not going to write about you in her diary... you're SAFE, reliable, trustworthy, and a friend.

I would think that you would be better off in a situation like this getting her use to you touching her or cuddling with her and looking to get her horny, and when she tries to slow it down assuring her that the two of you aren't going to have sex, and turning her on to the point where she WANTS it.

That's useful if you don't mind losing the friendship. That "it got weird" situation which follows such events generally damages friendships or destroys them, and also virtually always generates mistrust of you in the aftermath.

Laying it out logically on the table like this would seem like a easy way for her to draw up even more solid boundaries.

That's because you're still failing to appreciate that in this case, YOU ARE OFFERING HER SOMETHING, NOT ASKING HER FOR ANYTHING! - Please go back to revisit the original post again.

Anyways thats just my evaluation based off of what Johnny has told us. It's a very non-community perspective for sure, not that the community has all the answers but women are emotional creatures not logical ones and this just seems awfully weird to me.

This idea that logic and emotions are orthogonal, or that they operate AGAINST each-other is staggering to me?

I never make a conscious decision unless my logic reasoning AND my emotional reasoning agree?

While female archetypes consider things with an emotional-bias, they don't IGNORE critical thinking entirely! Just as we males don't do the "Spock" thing, and heartlessly lead using nothing buy objective logical reasoning.

Hell, men are MUCH more sentimental than women... and make countless decisions considering things which ONLY matter to our own emotions.

I certainly have the maturity to handle a deal like this, but I see it as a last resort. I hardly think it is a reason to drop all community theory and become every womans friend and then have a logical discussion with them, I fail to see how this could work out for an abundant sex life -- even if your not attached to the outcome.

I don't understand what triggered you to leap to your conclusions? Where does any of this suggest 'dropping all community theory'?

Regardless, if you have legitimate female friends, bringing this to them AS OUTLINED HERE, without adding much or anything beyond what I have explicitly explained, cannot have a negative impact on your relationship, PROVIDING YOU MEAN IT. And it very likely will begin a longterm, playful, ongoing sexual friendship with someone you truly enjoy.

Johnny Soporno
Preaching What I Practice

 

[Johnny Soporno]

This is a consistency with Johnny Soporno. He gives out this advice that looks as though he’s put a lot of thought into it and it seems reasonable enough, yet he never is quite able to show the details of how it works.

Not so - Potato, you in particular are merely too parochial and dogmatic to recognize that EVERYTHING ONE NEEDS TO KNOW is already written there, plain as day.

Try going back and actually READING it. Go ahead, we'll wait.

Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy