Chick withholding sex- need some perspective

[cordoncordon]

Because I didn't care. Degrade myself? Pfft. I'll let you worry about conforming to the "ideal man" standards.

Good luck with that..."dawg". You have mad game. I mean you got to go down on a chick for hours and then you even got to jack off!! And you didn't even have to fvck her! Wow how can I learn your skillllzzzzz?

 

[MacAvoy]

Good luck with that..."dawg". You have mad game. I mean you got to go down on a chick for hours and then you even got to jack off!! And you didn't even have to fvck her! Wow how can I learn your skillllzzzzz?

This is what sucks about forums. Its not obvious if this is sarcasm or not.

 

[cordoncordon]

This is what sucks about forums. Its not obvious if this is sarcasm or not.

If you read my previous post about "dawg" you could see I was being about as sarcastic as you could get.

I mean the guy takes pride in going down on a chick for hours, not F'ing her, and then jacking off when she left.

I would hate to see how he would feel if he actually got a BJ.

 

[STR8UP]

Good luck with a 22 y/o and 'not playing games.' I don't think you can have it both ways. Emotional maturity is hard enough to find in women, but it is nearly impossible to find in the 22 y/o ones. She is merely acting her age, and it is to be expected.

I hear ya.

I think part of this has to do with the fact that we jumped right into the sack in the beginning, and now she is trying to reel it back in a little cause she felt that she was reckless at the start.

Another thing about this one is that she's still a hopeless romantic. She hasn't had enough time to experience the "real world" yet, which I'm sure has much bearing on her decisions.

 

[Luveno]

Isn't it chicks who use Instant Messengers? I assumed that medium was strictly for high school girls who are too anxious to hit up thier buddies on MySpace?

Guys don't do this. Men talk to women to thier faces.

Maybe I'm wrong?

Nah, I'm not.

Isn't it just geeks who flame strangers on message boards? I assumed that medium was strictly for high school nerds who are too cowardly to confront others to their faces?

Guy's don't do this. Men express disagreement to people's faces.

Maybe I'm wrong?

Nah, I'm not.

 

[cordoncordon]

I hear ya.

I think part of this has to do with the fact that we jumped right into the sack in the beginning, and now she is trying to reel it back in a little cause she felt that she was reckless at the start.

Another thing about this one is that she's still a hopeless romantic. She hasn't had enough time to experience the "real world" yet, which I'm sure has much bearing on her decisions.

Look str8up you're 36 and a grown man. She is 22 and a very young woman. You have better things to worry about than this. If she decides to come over and stay fine, try and make some moves on her. If she doesn't that is fine too because you have better more quality women to go after.

It is what it is, or could be, a fling. Not worth over analyzing or even worrying about at all.

Good luck.

 

[speed dawg]

If you read my previous post about "dawg" you could see I was being about as sarcastic as you could get.

I mean the guy takes pride in going down on a chick for hours, not F'ing her, and then jacking off when she left.

I would hate to see how he would feel if he actually got a BJ.

The entire premise of my post went completely over your head.

the guy takes pride

Nobody said that. And I'm not going to sit here and get in an internet contest of who gets the most girls. I'm doing what I want to do, making the best of the situation.

So I'm going to not do what I like to do (eating a hot chick's pvssy) because somehow it degrades me? I could care less what the girl thinks. If she doesn't want to fvck, so what, tomorrow's another day and another girl who will. I'm in no hurry.

You leave a lot to be desired, pal. Take care of yourself before you criticize, uh, "dawg".

And what's even funnier, is this:

Look str8up you're a 36 and a grown man. She is 22 and a very young woman. You have better things to worry about than this. If she decides to come over and stay fine, try and make some moves on her. If she doesn't that is fine too because you have better more quality women to go after.

It is what it is, or could be, a fling. Not worth over analyzing or even worrying about at all.

....which is saying the EXACT same thing I was. I just gave an example. Reading comprehension isn't your strong suit.

 

[STR8UP]

Look str8up you're 36 and a grown man. She is 22 and a very young woman. You have better things to worry about than this. If she decides to come over and stay fine, try and make some moves on her. If she doesn't that is fine too because you have better more quality women to go after.

It's a little more complicated than that.

I just can't help but think that I might have let my ego get in the way of productivity. And you know what? If we don't get together and we don't have sex ever again....whatever. But the thought that I might have burned a bridge over something so trivial pisses me off.

 

[cordoncordon]

It's a little more complicated than that.

I just can't help but think that I might have let my ego get in the way of productivity. And you know what? If we don't get together and we don't have sex ever again....whatever. But the thought that I might have burned a bridge over something so trivial pisses me off.

Well yeah I mean i won't argue with you. lol I think telling a girl that you care for on more than "wanna fvck" level that she basically can't stay over unless she puts out is pretty lame. No doubt about that.

So why don't you just tell her that you thought about it and that you were wrong to demand that from her and if she wants to still stay over she is more than welcome. And you PROMISE not to make any moves on her (say that while you are laughing or smiling at her). And leave it at that.

Not worth getting in a tizzy about.

 

[Señor Fingers]

"I just want to take things slow, get to know each other emotionally. Sex clouds things"

"I don't want to make the same mistakes I've made in the past"

"I talked to my friend about this and it's all so clear"

"I just got out of a relationship and it was more serious than you realize. I need some time."

Read between the lines.. she wasn't saying "no sex, ever" it was more like "lets not rape each other right away.. I just been through some real sh!t and need someone who understands, that would really turn me on!"

Since we have had sex several times before, this is a HUUUUUGE red flag.

The red flag would have been if she was willing to just jump in the sack with you after a serious breakup. Only someone who has no value for their emotional well-being or sexuality does something like this.

She was actually doing something HEALTHY for herself. The above shows that she is trying to gather her wits and not make the same mistakes that led to her dysfunctional relationship. She was being honest with you .. sex DOES cloud things, especially when you are in a vulnerable state.

You shoulda played cool and let her believe that you guys were going to just talk and cuddle all night, and then let one thing lead to another naturally. Instead you took it personal and lashed out with confrontation.

Your motives for this don't become clear till right about here

I haven't had sex in awhile, but I'm not about to go into a situation like this with a chick holding sex over my head.

BINGO!

Nothing else is on your plate. You simply care too much about having sex and that's why you were such a selfish prick about this.

But that's not even your biggest problem.

There is another, deeper issue that seems to plague you across many of your posts. I notice that overall, you tend to be overly cautious and paranoid with women. Even the ones that you like are somehow conspiring against you, or trying to "play games".

Half the time you may even be right, cuz women do lie and manipulate. But it seems like your BS radar is busted and in terms of sincerity, you couldn't tell your ass from your elbow.

More often than not I get the impression that half these so-called games are really all in your head, and you are just playing yourself.

Now..

Personally I would drop it like a hot potato.. this is a lot of baggage to be dealing with and you should be hitting up other prospects.

But..

If you are interested in hollering again, you have to drop that massive pride of yours and apologize for being insensitive. Say that you miss her and "just want to hang". I know that sounds weak, but it actually takes strength to admit when you are wrong, and BALLS to be sincere, even if you think it sounds AFC.

IMHO

 

[scottfall]

^^ The voice of sanity.

Its just hard to tell the difference between my ass and my elbow because for a long time I thought I knew the difference between the two, but then along comes a girl and ****s you into confusing the two.

 

[KarmaSutra]

The entire premise of my post went completely over your head.

Nobody said that. And I'm not going to sit here and get in an internet contest of who gets the most girls. I'm doing what I want to do, making the best of the situation.

So I'm going to not do what I like to do (eating a hot chick's pvssy) because somehow it degrades me? I could care less what the girl thinks. If she doesn't want to fvck, so what, tomorrow's another day and another girl who will. I'm in no hurry.

You leave a lot to be desired, pal. Take care of yourself before you criticize, uh, "dawg".

And what's even funnier, is this:

....which is saying the EXACT same thing I was. I just gave an example. Reading comprehension isn't your strong suit.

Speed Dawg just took you to school Cordon. Your overt facetiousness was uncalled for. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, wrong with a brother eating his fill of furburger if that is what sexually gratifies him. Say you like giving women an hour long massage only to have them fall asleep on you; does that make you a sissy because you didn't close the deal? Or would a guy like you think it macho and "man up" by fvcking her in her sleep? From what you've so eloquently stated as long as you fvck her you're a man.

And I'll reiterate that you just rewrote exactly what he stated in his previous post and called it yours.

You're not talking to boys here. If you want to be bigger than who you are stay in the Discussion Forum.

MM is for closers only.

 

[Luthor Rex]

Half the time you may even be right, cuz women do lie and manipulate. But it seems like your BS radar is busted and in terms of sincerity, you couldn't tell your ass from your elbow.

I'm thinking his BS radar has been overwhelmed. Saturated to the point where everything smells bad.

Not sure how you fix that, tho.

 

[MacAvoy]

I think S8 needs to get off his high horse and start banging some hors.

 

[KontrollerX]

"Like I said, my gut just told me to take it this way and I did. Maybe the outcome would have been better had I kept my mouth shut and played along, I don't know. But it did at least feel good to make it known that I don't play games."

And thats really all that needs to be said for this topic.

The gut instinct feeling of danger ie this is not a good path, don't follow this person, etc. That sense is never wrong.

Also to some in here letting their inner symp shine through getting this piece of pvssy at all costs is what you should of done Str8up.

And thats wrong, wrong, wrong.

No woman much less a 22 year old woman who you can easily replace btw is worth you giving in to her frame and playing her stupid games just to get from her what you've already had from her.

The symp mentality being espoused here is you fvcked up, you should of catered to her bullsh!t and took a gamble by letting her stay at your place under her frame and on her terms. The chance you might get sex is worth it for those with the symp mentality but a DJ knows that once he drops the frame he loses all the power even if he does get the pvssy.

He also feels like sh!t and less of a man for falling for this idea.

So when a chick puts you in an unwinnable situation like this in the future you have to simply find a way to turn that unwinnable situation around on her and like I said before make her into being the assh0le.

You have to use clever and subtle wordage that its not cool the deal that she's proposing, to assume you are that kind of man and you'd even think about using her like that (of course you do want the sex but you're trying to make her feel bad here) and then quickly go to hanging up on her after you tell her "look I gotta go".

The idea behind being a DJ is you have so many options you do what you want on your terms, its the very idea behind Rollo's plate theory. No woman can cause you to take her frame and play her stupid games if you don't want to because you've got a cooler chick you can call up if a certain woman tries to pull some garbage game on you that you'd rather not play.

You are a true DJ Str8up with plenty of options.

You are also 36 years old.

Once again you don't need the hassle and there is another 22 year old, 20 year old, 18 year old and 19 year old just around the corner who wants you so badly at the next party you'll go to that you could say...excuse me what was the name of that chick who was trying to play the no sex game with me again?

 

[cordoncordon]

Speed Dawg just took you to school Cordon. Your overt facetiousness was uncalled for. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, wrong with a brother eating his fill of furburger if that is what sexually gratifies him. Say you like giving women an hour long massage only to have them fall asleep on you; does that make you a sissy because you didn't close the deal? Or would a guy like you think it macho and "man up" by fvcking her in her sleep? From what you've so eloquently stated as long as you fvck her you're a man.

And I'll reiterate that you just rewrote exactly what he stated in his previous post and called it yours.

You're not talking to boys here. If you want to be bigger than who you are stay in the Discussion Forum.

MM is for closers only.

Way to carry over your grudge for me from another thread to this one.

You're the breast!!

As for what "dawg" did...I guess I would expect someone like you to think that he was ok for that. But hey, if you dont think that eating some chick out for hours, not even getting a BJ or a fvck out of it, and then going home and jacking off to what he did, AND BEING PROUD OF IT, is wrong on so many levels than i can see why you have been on this site for so long and still are and will always be GAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. I mean thats my whole point. He was bragging about it. Sounds like you would be too.

I just can't even comprehend the train of thought where under any circumstances I would be happy about giving a chick oral for two hours and having to go home to whack it to get off.

Of course as I recall you have had threesomes with a guy and a girl so it all fits.

Gay.

Now...go get your shine box!

 

[ThunderMaverick]

oops.

Anyways, it's not a good situation where STR8 has to have a girl who's had sex with him in his house not giving it up when he clearly wants it.

I know girls B.S. and say things that they don't mean at times, and we can bend their will with covert communication as well, HOWEVER...

...It's extremely stupid for STR8 to be taking such a gamble when the girl will be actually LIVING WITH HIM. It's not as simple as "yeah just seduce her yada ya ya" he's got a live-IN situation AAAND what if the girl really meant what she said? You can't be too sure until you try, yes, but if it truly doesn't work out, he'll have to hold his nuts while, like he said, watch her strut around in a t-shirt and little cotton panties for the duration of her stay.

Not a good situation to be in.

I think he was ABSOLUTELY right in calling it out immediately. No one wants to get the wrong idea further down the road. You might have lost the battle, STR8, but you won this war.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Isn't it just geeks who flame strangers on message boards? I assumed that medium was strictly for high school nerds who are too cowardly to confront others to their faces?

Guy's don't do this. Men express disagreement to people's faces.

Maybe I'm wrong?

Nah, I'm not.

I gotta give credit where it's due. Good comeback :moon:

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Looks like a power move to me, going down on a girl for hours while you jackoff and don't get any sticking in.

You can do whatever you want with your life. Not my problem. But Jesus-titty-fu<k, I would never brag about that. I agree with Cordon.

LAWL.

 

[Señor Fingers]

The gut instinct feeling of danger ie this is not a good path, don't follow this person, etc. That sense is never wrong.

It's usually on point, but sometimes our instincts are off. It's a challenge to determine when the fear is warranted or if we are really just short-changing ourselves out of habit. The best determining factor is to take an objective look at one's progress to see if their approach/attitude is really working for them.

STR8UP has game, but he keeps hitting the same wall, which means something must change.

The symp mentality being espoused here is you fvcked up, you should of catered to her bullsh!t and took a gamble by letting her stay at your place under her frame and on her terms. The chance you might get sex is worth it for those with the symp mentality but a DJ knows that once he drops the frame he loses all the power even if he does get the pvssy.

Catering? Gambling? You got it twisted, KX.

He dropped frame by getting upset about the no sex comment. Girls will always put up token resistence of some sort, a DJs job is to laugh at it and just keep charming their pants off. Nothing symp about that.

So when a chick puts you in an unwinnable situation like this in the future you have to simply find a way to turn that unwinnable situation around on her and like I said before make her into being the assh0le.

That's not really conducive to leading the situation though.. it's a struggle for power, which suggests that you are not in control to begin with.

You have to use clever and subtle wordage that its not cool the deal that she's proposing, to assume you are that kind of man and you'd even think about using her like that (of course you do want the sex but you're trying to make her feel bad here) and then quickly go to hanging up on her after you tell her "look I gotta go".

Nah.. that's how women play. This would be an excellent opportunity to act offended, but not really take it to heart.. when she made the no sex comment, instead of "calling her out" he could have zinged her a bit like this

"LOL, wow, you must really think I'm some kind of pervert or something.. I don't know whether to be flattered or offended."

Makes her think about what she's saying without you getting all dramatic.

The idea behind being a DJ is you have so many options you do what you want on your terms, its the very idea behind Rollo's plate theory. No woman can cause you to take her frame and play her stupid games if you don't want to because you've got a cooler chick you can call up if a certain woman tries to pull some garbage game on you that you'd rather not play.

This is bang on. His lack of options gave him too much vested interest in this one piece of pvssy, which is why he lost his cool.

Personally, I think the right thing to do is subjective. It all depends on your goal with the girl.

Good point.

If STR8UP was just looking for a casual lay, then this chick sounds like a waste of time.

He did hint at the fact that he liked her and they got along.. but only he knows his own intentions.

Still it's good to see so many different perspectives, which is what STR8UP was looking for to begin with. Each of us plays a different hand and these types of exchanges only make us more well-rounded.