Challenging the Ex - Analyze This

[kinjo]

Guys, I'm quite anxious and need to hear your thoughts on this.

I have cut all contacts with my ex of 1,3 years who dumpt me for about 10 days now. I found out another way that she is courting with a high IL guy now. Not sure what happen now or then, she didnt wanna say and lied about it when I bring it up.

I am in the process of moving on to Living Well as my sweet revenge, however, I'm wondering with all the AFC qualities I've shown her before that, if she will gonna call me and beg me (the recovering AFC) to return to her.

Based on advices I received, a thread http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=21610 about the ganji games and also from other similar threads, thats basicly says that when I cut all contacts with her, naturaly she supposedly become desperate and will think about me, and then finally will call me to see if she can still "hook" me to give her attention. Power play. You get the point right.

Still clouded, I cannot see through this one, please advice.
I originally posted my case here, (my sincere gratitude for all the guys who has provided great support and advice there):
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&postid=326011#post326011

Have some doubts whether she will call however, but I need an answer to get rid these remaining anxiety and be more prepared.
=============

So here's the facts:
-------------------------
- She gave her virginity to me, we promise to take it to marriage. (keep in mind that we live in a strong eastern value country)
- She has a very high IL in the beginning of relationship, but the last 2-3 months took a dive to IL below 50%. Maybe about 30-49 now.
- She's an attractive naive innocent looking 22 yo, with Neg traits: has lots and lots of male friends, uses some "nice guys" to do favors for her, little attractive females (traits of attention ho), naive, immature thinking, manipulative to get her own way. Positive traits: make no enemy at all cost, often thoughtful, sensitive, sexy, no no no... I will not think more of it. LOL

During break up period:
She said I need space and I cannot put up with your attitude anymore (I gave her no challenge, BORING, PREDICTABLE, meet daily and I was being a jerk pushing my "desires") I agreed, but...

- For 3 weeks straight after break up I give her all out "I'm a wimp and unworthy" AFC tendencies. These includes a couple letter writing (changing proposal) *hoeeeekkkkk*, showing painful desperation, and finally, an attempt of "intentedly to fail" suicide, and told her about it by sms at 3 in the morning. Damn AFC huh? The next day, expensive gifts are presented to her understanding of my idiotic behavior. I WANT MY MONEY BACK! DAMN IT! Laugh guys... but I found this forum in week 2.

- In the end of that 3 weeks (that's 2 days after the above), while I'm still the AFC, I cannot put up with her becoming disrespectful, indifferent, annoyed with my presence, using me (not really, but I actually offer myself to do her favors), I sms her that I'm busy, so better find others to do it, and a few days later I bagged all gifts she has given me and trash it in front of her place. She was very upset for my disrespect, and that is the last time I saw her till now. I also told her that day that I'm gonna delete all her phone #'s, hint her that I "erase" all my past with her in my mind. Easier said than done.

No contact period:
Day:
1 - I send her 1 flirty "missend" sms supposedly to my girl friend, trying to make her jealous, trying to show her that I do not give a sheet about her anymore.
2 - She sms me at 12am about her crying and her feelings being down being sentimental. (details on original post - link's above )
3 - I reply sms with "You're right. This is the best way for now"
4 - Another missend sms, shortly followed by my sms to her apologizing for the sending mistake. No respond.
5 - Another missend sms. This is the last missend sms I attempted.
6 - 9 Nothing.
10 - I sms her asking info about place I wanna go. In 48 second she reply with the info. I replied back with my prefference, but do not indicate anything that require her to reply back. She did not.
11 - 14 Nothing happens till now.
--------------------------------------------

I'd like to test out and confirm what I learn here, and keep her wanting me more, prove myself as a challenge to her.

My questions for that first call:
1. Will she make the call of desperation to me? If not, why?

2. Given facts above, how long do you think from now should I expect she will make the call? I know you're not physcic, but give me your theories guys, I've provided you enough info.

3. When she calls, should I be "regular" (living well, desireless, I don't need you mindset), or dont pick up, or lie?

-----------
Regular (recovering AFC talk):
"hi how's goin? bla bla bla for 2 -3 min, and then, "hey, I gotta go, kinda busy right now can I call u back?", hang up, never call again. Repeat the drill everytime she calls.
-----------
Dont pick up.(if she calls my cell phone, regular phone have no caller ID here)
Never pick up, or pick up if she calls 2, 3, or more times and be regular, or lie?
-----------
Lie:
Me: "Hello...
Her: Hello...
(excitedly) oh, hi (other girl), hey, you left your (something) in my car...
then, go to "regular" when she identify herself...
-----------

I don't know which combo to prepare my mind with, LOL, I don't wanna be like Survivor who freeze up being an AFC again when "the one" calls.


Thanks guys!

 

[squirrels]

rAFC my ass. You are STILL hung up on this girl. You're trying to use "DJ tactics" to play mind games to sway her back to you. When whiny phone-calls and fake suicide attempts failed to win her back, you decided to try out a new package of tactics. The thing that remains the same is:

-You are OUT OF CONTROL
-You are acting in DESPERATION
-You have a SEVERE one-itis
-You require her approval and her affection to feel good

Bottom line: You are STILL obsessed with her. It doesn't matter WHAT "tactics" you read here or anywhere else, you're still approaching this with the attitude of "I want to win her back to complete my life," instead of "I have a wonderful life on my own, and sharing it with someone like her would augment life for BOTH of us." THIS is why she left you. THIS is why she will CONTINUE to need "space." Your tactics may win back her interest for a little while, but eventually she will see through them and realize you are TRYING to be someone you are NOT. Then the drama will begin all over again.

What should you do? CUT ALL CONTACT! She SMSes you? You never got it. She calls you? "What? Huh, oh hi. What do you need? Nothing? I'm kinda busy right now. Bye." You see her on the street? Smile, maybe say hello, but KEEP ON WALKING.

Get yourself some hobbies. Meet other people! STOP giving her attention, DJ or otherwise. You are boring her, supplicating to her, and trying to be someone you're not just to appease her, instead of BEING DJ because you WANT TO BE A MAN.

I'm sorry if I'm taking particular exception to you, I'm sure you're listening, but you still don't get it.

You do NOT need her. She cannot tell you who you are. She has no right to approve or disapprove of you and the way you live your life. She cannot control you unless you let her, unless you are too weak to manage your own feelings.

Stop the lies, the games, the "missent SMSes", the "mistaken identities"...they are all stupid games, and she WILL see through them and WILL think you are friggin crazy.

Instead, take some time and work on YOU.

NO MORE SMS
NO MORE EMAIL
NO MORE PHONE
NO MORE MEETING
NO MORE THINKING about her.

NEXT!!

Stop acting like you have something to prove, to her OR to yourself, by winning her back. You don't. You've already got all the tools at your disposal. If you are incomplete, you need to fix that YOURSELF. She can't do it for you.

Let go...you'll feel better.

 

[b's nuts]

i would seriously move on. the suicide attempts, that is so desperate and needy that I doubt she will ever want you back. Do a boot camp, start fresh, it sounds like you are starting to change you mindset, but you still have a serious case of oneitis.

Boot camp

Bible

Try and fvck 10 girls, you will forget about her before you get to 10.

 

[bugsquish]

Bow down to the words of Squirrels, or banish yourself forever to a world of dispair and torment. She's NEVER coming back. NEVER, ever, ever EVER. And every second you try to change that puts another nail into the coffin of your self esteem.

Think yourself LUCKY! I got dumped by my ex on Valentines Day - which coincided almost exactly with our 4 year anniversary. I did, to an extent, move on with my life - but for over a year pretty much everything I did was a masked attempt to win her back her somehow. Then I found sosuave. I read this site and BB for a couple of weeks and decided to cut off all contact with her. Instead I concentrated on improving myself, my communication skills, and understanding women in general.

Now after a couple of months she DID start trying to get in touch and spend more time together - but only as friends (as we had been for the past year). But the difference this time, after studying the ways of the DJ, was that I actually didn't mind not having her. I was enjoying being single too much. I no longer needed any approval from her to be happy, or to be myself.

Now things are getting a little wierd, I admit

 

[kinjo]

squirrels, you saw right through me.
Just trying to get some insights squirrels, but thanks for the tips.

b's nuts, I'm killing the desperation. Taking baby steps on the week 1 Boot Camp, the DJ bible 70% read.

bugsquish, what do you mean by "Now things are getting a little wierd, I admit "?

I'm making baby steps and still progressing to overcome my social phobias, reprogramming mindset, getting a life. Friendlier now toward strangers, able to hold friendly eye contacts, and already feeling much better. Desire for her has dropped and keep dropping, instilling I do not need woman daily.

I just need insights on these presumably to speed up things up on my understanding of what I read.

Since Anthony Robbins (in theory), this forum is the best self improvement material I get my hands on, and it's free.

 

[bugsquish]

lol, click "wierd" in my post

 

[kinjo]

Originally posted by bugsquish
Bow down to the words of Squirrels, or banish yourself forever to a world of dispair and torment. She's NEVER coming back. NEVER, ever, ever EVER. And every second you try to change that puts another nail into the coffin of your self esteem.

Why are you so sure she's NEVER coming back?

 

[Player_Supreme]

1. After reading this I will say this, that you have blown any chances of recovering her.

2. You've lost her total interest and respect. To of tried to suicide was the worst thing you could of done.

3. The good thing is that you found this site. It is here that you will find the support and salvation. It is here that you will learn the tools of revenge! Yeah that's how I play it. Doing well is the best revenge. Dating a bunch of hot chicks and letting her see how well your doing is the sweetest revenge! I put mine under the care of a psychiatrist this way. I made sure she knew that I was dating strippers, models, ho's, and all types of women just to make her feel some of the pain I was feeling.

I made sure that her friends saw me and she saw me out with a new woman each week at various clubs. It was sweet revenge to have these women all kissing on me and waiting on me hand and foot while my ex glared. It got so bad one time that she was dancing right next to me trying to out do the nurse that I had just picked up at another club....of course I was able to manipulate further sex from her...since she still felt the need to prove that she was still wanted...this lasted for 6 months until I grew tired of it. As you will too.

The worst thing you could try to get from her is pity sex....no man should roll like that. No real man that is.

It's over with your ex and you need to reconize this "fact". She is out looking for others...you will have to get used to the idea that she will be taking another man to her bed...sorry that's the brutal truth of it...I and every man on here has had to face this fact.

What we learn is not how to close our hearts down, but that life is ever flowing and changing....some people come and go in our lives...and we endure their coming and going cause that is life...constantly changing and evolving. This girl saved you years of future pain...cause in your pain you reached out and pulled this site into your world.

Now your here and it's time for you to learn. It was ment to be and neccessary for you to go throught this in order to find your way to where you were ment to be.

I say Baka (bad spelling) on her.

"what your seeking is causing you to seek it" zen saying.

"when the student is ready the teacher will appear" another zen saying

you are ment to become a great seducer of women...that is your right and destiny....that is why your here...

You just need to let go of the past and take the leap into a bright future. Out there is the perfect one for you waiting for you to get the skills needed to land her. Right now if you met her you would loose her just like you did with this last one.

You need to learn and raise your energy up to the level of "her" whom is waiting for you in your future.

So learn kid.

 

[Player_Supreme]

One last thing:

can the pity posts. you will find none with me. what you need is to be reading the bible and learning and practicing what you learn. not posting oh woe is me. start posting your boot camp results. you need to start taking positive steps....not negative self deprecating beating yourself moves such as these postings.

get the f*ck out there and play the game...score some p*ussy for the rest of the f*uck on this board who will not step up and do it.

teach them that it can be done. even by a man who had nothing to start with!

strive forward and achieve...in the fires of your pain and desperation you will forge the man you are to become.

 

[Slickster]

You've had great advice here Kinjo. Follow it.

Player Supreme

It's over with your ex and you need to reconize this "fact". She is out looking for others...you will have to get used to the idea that she will be taking another man to her bed...sorry that's the brutal truth of it...I and every man on here has had to face this fact.

What we learn is not how to close our hearts down, but that life is ever flowing and changing....some people come and go in our lives...and we endure their coming and going cause that is life...constantly changing and evolving. This girl saved you years of future pain...cause in your pain you reached out and pulled this site into your world.

Now your here and it's time for you to learn. It was ment to be and neccessary for you to go throught this in order to find your way to where you were ment to be.

Sh*t! Player, that stuff you said brought me back to when I first came here. Sent chills down my spine bro. Wise words.

 

[kinjo]

Thanks for the advice, I know it is a great one, but STILL it is easier said than done.

I think I have a one problem left. Please advice on this.

I have been thinking about a cell phone that I bought her for nothing early in the relationship, with my hard earned money (being nice, since her other cell does not function well, I bought her a new one so when I call her, the cell phone won't die on me. She also still possess her first bf cell that is on loan to her that she never return for years even I did asked her to. She said she'll return it to him when she graduated. She now has 2 numbers and using MY cell and the other as a back up)

Now, it boils my anger to think that she is using it to romance this other guy. And the thought that I bought her the cell more for my own benefits than her got me thinking, should I say,"Hey, your rent for the cell phone is up. I need an upgrade for my cell, and I want it back so I can sell it and uprade mine, I'll pick it up tommorow, you better have it ready by then."

Well, she loves MY cellphone and collects a lot of this picture messages, ring tones, cute SMS's, forwards and stuffs stored in MY cell to have fun with her boy friends.

If I take the cell back, she will be VERY PISSED.
The other problem is, I did GAVE her as a present. Well, if I take it back, that would make me look real bad, huh? Another dilemma.
Should I, should't I... I'm should'ing all over mysself here!

Her birthday is coming up this 28 Sept. If I want revenge, that day would be it. On 29th onwards for 2 weeks, she is gonna be real busy doing exam for her final year in the uni.

What's the best way to deal with this?

 

[kyokon]

What's the best way to deal with that?? It doesn't need dealing with, like the other guy already said:

NO MORE SMS
NO MORE EMAIL
NO MORE PHONE
NO MORE MEETING
NO MORE THINKING about her.

 

[TesuqueRed]

Cell phone?

If you gave it to her, it belongs to her. If you're paying for her plan, cancel it. And don't think any more about it.

 

[Blaaaaat]

I agree with TesuqueRed, you gave the cell to her, it's hers. There is no more dealing with it, it's done. You made a mistake of giving the phone, this are the consecuenses(sp?).

 

[CONAN]

How many times do you need to be told the same thing?
you are setting yourself up for a massive depession!
Forget it ......Move on
C

 

[ZeeOwl]

I really understand how you feel. Getting dumped by a woman you're crazy about is probably the most painful thing a guy can go though. I've been there:
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/sh...&threadid=35951
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/sh...&threadid=36298
Both threads are about the same woman. Might provide some insight into what you're going through, and your ex's behavior. You haven't cut off all contact with her, you're lying to yourself. Player_Supreme's post was right on the money, and beautiful (I didn't know you could be so touchy-feely Player ). You still want her, and that's normal. The pain is recent and still fresh. I got dumped by the woman from my above posts 5 years ago, and I had a relapse a month ago! Man, am I mad at myself. I'm taking steps to put this behind me once and for all. You need too also. My solution wouldn't apply to your situation because the circumstances are completely different (you're still in contact with your ex whenever you want to be). Again, I think Player_Supreme has given you the best possible attitude and actions to take to pull yourself out of this one. It will take time, and be painful, but you must do it or else you will be miserable for the rest of your life.

And as for getting her back, I agree with the other guys. The suicide scenario is what killed any slim chance you may have had. The only type of girl who would come back to a guy that pulled a stunt like that, is the desperate needy type that usually gets ignored by guys. In other words, a AFCette. From your posts, I get the impression that she's not that type of girl. So the only feelings she could possibly have for you is pity, and maybe disgust. Is this what you want?

Is it me, or are there more and more of these types of threads? I was just thinking... Maybe we ought to suggest Allen add a "Getting over your ex" section to the board?... It would be like a virtual AA for RAFCs... And it would clear up this section for discussions about DJing only.

 

[kinjo]

Originally posted by ZeeOwl
You haven't cut off all contact with her, you're lying to yourself. Again, I think Player_Supreme has given you the best possible attitude and actions to take to pull yourself out of this one. It will take time, and be painful, but you must do it or else you will be miserable for the rest of your life.

I haven't meet her since 3 Sept 03. Basicaly I cut moderate contact until 12 Sept (several SMS), and until today 25 Sept. No contact whatsoever. I tried NOT to count my days, but it is like second nature, like I'm losing control of my own focus. I'd like to focus on something else, but she's still RIGHT THERE when I open my eyes in the morning till I go to sleep at night.

I keep saying to my self that I do not want her. I can make myself happy. But the fact is, I've been placing my own happiness to all my gf in the 7 years. That's a tough habit to break.

To be in relationship with her, I literally move here to the city she studied, work here, and evolve my life around her. I have no friends here and I live alone. Imagine that, and now I have no life. I started to take some baby steps to change that but takes time to build one.

Yes, I finished reading the DJB, and read many posts here, for a few weeks, that's mostly I am doing. Supports and advice from posts I recieved from my threads really help me though. Even they are saying the same things over and over again, I feel better that at least you guys are there for me.

Doing the boot camp for week 1 to week 2 is fine but after that it needs a real courage. I live in a high crime rate country where mostly everyone is hostile, insecure, and suspicious of strangers. It may do me more harm than good.

But still, it (loneliness, desperation) hits me like waves, and these last couple of days I'm keep holding myself back NOT to break the contact again. Damn, I even unconciously keep looking for ways to get back, or get in touch with her. I know this is not good and don't want to do this, but hey, you guys been through that before and you know how it feels, plus add the no friends, live alone, no life.

Originally posted by ZeeOwl
And as for getting her back, I agree with the other guys. The suicide scenario is what killed any slim chance you may have had. The only type of girl who would come back to a guy that pulled a stunt like that, is the desperate needy type that usually gets ignored by guys. In other words, a AFCette. From your posts, I get the impression that she's not that type of girl. So the only feelings she could possibly have for you is pity, and maybe disgust. Is this what you want?

I knew it. She did really turn really cold on me after that day. Jealousy is a real killer. Someone posted that, to get ANY chance to get back to her (not sure by then if I still want her), I have to really catapult my wimpy azz as far away as possible. Then if we meet again, it will be like almost brand new. Like what... a year, or two? I get over my "first love like" 2 years until I finally STOP thinking of her. I do have history of oneitis.

Originally posted by ZeeOwl
Is it me, or are there more and more of these types of threads? I was just thinking... Maybe we ought to suggest Allen add a "Getting over your ex" section to the board?... It would be like a virtual AA for RAFCs... And it would clear up this section for discussions about DJing only.

There is a few I found, same pathetic stories like mine, same cause and effect. A special foirum will be interesting, where DJ's only come there for support and advice for AFC's like me, I know many other DJ's are sick to their stomach to read another stories like this. However, I found supports and advice from this forum really helped me bear the pain.

The more posts I get, the better I feel, then the content of advice provide new ways of thinking that help my thinking over my emotions. (that's support is all about anyway right?) But I personally think it will be a lot convinient if "getting over ex" materials in arranged in one place since I have a though time finding/searching it. I feel to get over this, I need to understand ALL the reasonings behind advices I received, since you cannot control what you do not understand. And I certainly, as someone said in their post here is that I STILL don't get it.

Well, I get half of it, the other half is I still haven't been able to put myself together and control my own rational over my feelings/traitor. The only way I gonna do that is to put enough believeable reasonings to overwhelm the feelings and KILL it.

So far, I still believe that one day she's gonna come back, on the grounds that she loose her virginity to me, (we live in a STRONG eastern culture, no sex before marriage) and she left me saying I'm no longer a challenge for her.

I notice this is what keep running on my unconsious, " There must be a way to win her respect and interest back, if you look you'll find, Impossible is I'm possible, there is nothing I cannot do, there will come a time when I'll have my chance with her. She's a Woman, it's not her fault that she dump me, I was the AFC, I better figure out things to subtly make her emotionally respond to me again. There must be a way. Time is, DJ skills is, building an exciting life is, wealth is, etc etc, then you can go get her."

My other rational thoughts since this forum and after all advices is," You damn fool, stupid idiot, its over, you got it all wrong, all backwards, reverse, MOVE ON, GET A LIFE! Once she said it's over, It's over, not a chance, even if you get her, it's NOT going to be the same. Better start a NEW one, that's make sense. This... is not. Be a DJ, have a great life, and another great one will come!"

Well, they're still fighting. I don't know how long... that period will be a torture. Well, I've experience worse actually, this is the 4th break ups, but still I want her (she's the best from all my ex'es so far) for her qualities, values, physical and all that I want for a wife.

But, really, for several reasons (eastern culture, religion, minority etnics group), if dating is a numbers games then my odds of getting someone like her is pretty thin. She has good looks and body, is still naive and innocent, with all my new knowledge and DJ skills it all gonna be different. If not, another way is that I got to lower my own standards, which will be difficult or really wait for the right one which could be a really long time.

I read your thread ZeeOwl and my first thought is to do the same and get over with, save myself from false hopes. But the second thoughts and all the guys here want me to do otherwise, which I know is the best way. But, (NO BUT, I know...) it still fighting inside my head. I need to strengthen the second thought.

If I want to do that and see her (which I know MAY severely set me back again), I got about 2 -4 weeks to think about it until she finished her exam, and HOPEFULLY, God help me, by then, I'm already over her, and I do not WANT her anymore, I do not have any desire to contact her again. If not. I'll be damn! Dont wanna waste my time in this, but, still have to roll with the punches, cannot run from reality. Can you?

However, that is just my mind chattering BS, what I really wanna do is to speed up this process I have to through asap and really move on and live well.

What I found helping me is writing these post and somehow the desperation feelings sort of released in small pieces, and the feeling of knowing that many people is there to support me. So, if these bothers you, please pardon the long threads and posts.
Thanks again for the support.

 

[kinjo]

Originally posted by squirrels
Instead, take some time and work on YOU.

NO MORE SMS
NO MORE EMAIL
NO MORE PHONE
NO MORE MEETING
NO MORE THINKING about her.

NEXT!!

Stop acting like you have something to prove, to her OR to yourself, by winning her back. You don't. You've already got all the tools at your disposal. If you are incomplete, you need to fix that YOURSELF. She can't do it for you.

Let go...you'll feel better.

squirrels, I know this is the summary of the right thing to do. Don't get mad at me if I seemed do not pay due respect to your good intention and do what it takes to get there. I'm still struggling here to go there.

NO MORE THINKING about her is the hardest so far. If my mind is a program, I'll certainly press the "delete" buttom like I did with all her digital image in my computer.

 

[Player_Supreme]

zeeowl

Player_Supreme's post was right on the money, and beautiful (I didn't know you could be so touchy-feely Player ).

I'm not all bad bruh...lol

Actually I do have a big heart. I just keep it on lock down. As a kinesthetic I am all touch and feelings. If I didn't, I wouldn't be able to write those email bombs I send to women out there..hehehe

Most women know I keep it on lock down, this is from an ex of mine who is a stripper who IM'd me yesterday on my SacDancer:

Sa : u r such talk, but it is your heart i am after
Sa : there is a good heart in there scared to be viewed
Sac : can you handle the heat of my heart
Sa : all boxed in this badass exterior
Sac : hmmm....
Sa : i was burned b4
Sac : and you will be again
Sac : nothing like getting a litte toasty
Sac : adds spice to life
Sa : then u have answered your own ?s...
Sac : no I haven't..I have only proposed more questions

Kinjo needs to learn how to handle his women like a Don Juan/Pimp/Player/Mack or whatever you wanna call it

Sac : your skurred
Sac : of my pimpin
Sa : i've been dancing a lot but i keep telling eveyone i don't have time to dance. i'm still not good at the word "no"
Sa : yeah. sskerred is right!
Sac : yeah you are
Sa : no i don't! i can't say yes or i'd get all flustered and messed up
Sac : how's all that booty doing
Sa : you get to me so easily
Sac : I am your mind seed babygirl
Sa : bootilicious
Sac : sprouting
Sa : yeah you are in there deep somewhere

I won't bore you with the rest...but when women sense your heart is on lock down...they will make it their goal to get it:

Sa : too bad u couldn't love just 1 who woulda taken u 2 special places...
Sa : "u think u know but u have no idea"...lol
Sac : yeah
Sa : do u hav eany idea what i was prepared to give you? who i was? what i was doing?
Sac : and what were you prepared to give too me
Sac : your soul
Sac : your every lasting devotion?
Sa : everything.
**********

Kinjo gave too much too soon. There was no challenge for that scrub anymore. So her being the scrub that she was or is dumped him and is now mouching off the next fool

 

[Player_Supreme]

Kinjo go here:

http://www.hoslap.net/

and take out your frustrations...believe me it will make you feel better

One of the things I noticed in reading your posts is and I'm sure Starman will agree with me on this issue...Kinjo your a control freak.

That's why you bought her a celly so you could always reach her. That is a control issue. That's why you found a scrub trifling kinda girl..(broke assed biytch). So she would be more into you since you had a little money.

Buying ho's shyt doesn't get you the respect or love. It only get's you played by golddigging types. Having control issues on the surface is a sign of weakness. You can be controlling in other ways without being a symp about it.

Women can be trained if you teach them right.