Called her out on her BS.. Did I screw up?

[terran2k]

Feelgoodbro. dude you did great. you did what most other guys wouldnt, you stood up for yourself, there's fu*king tons of potential for you man.
Ease, what did the Ex win? the girl wasnt a prize, all he got was a whole lot of pain and misery and arguments coming his way.

Feelgoodbro, she'll probably try to come back to you, tell her to **** off please.

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

She texted me earlier today asking a question about a class assignment. Probably just wanted to see if I would respond.

Looks like she is going to have to email the professor (who doesn't reply to emails)

:crackup:

Thanks for the encouragement boys.

 

[getready]

She's definately fishing for some attention. Whenever i go cold on a girl they will always text me some arbitrary thing wanting to see if I will text back and show that I will still give her the attention she wants. Don't do it. Keep up the no contact.

 

[PectoralisMajor]

this girl is a TRAINWRECK.

you have had a lucky ESCAPE. Good job to date, you have a feel for what she is up to and your handling it well.

best piece of advice i ever heard, never LISTEN to women, look at their ACTIONS instead. works everytime including with this crazy girl too.


Bet you she is at home going crazy because she isnt getting the power or control she wants over you.

 

[CantTouchMyStyle]

Trent: Our baby's all grown up.

Good job brother! No replies. Act cold as fvck in class as well.

Fvcking *****es and I would get tested if I were you. She was banging that other guy. Be safe.

 

[Tovansky]

lol dude, actually I am really impressed with what you did man. bravo! you are the man. GOOD JOB! seriously! woaaa...

some people wouldn't dare to do this, but you are the man seriously. You are doing what you are supposed to do, being the man.

from this point on, you are going to go another different level man. GOOD JOB. now move on, since there are a lot other girls waiting for a man like you out there. when you see her in class, be chill and be the man. be normal and she would want you even more, going on your pace, not the other way around.

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

Thanks.

Yeah, I know I did the right thing. It still hurts like a mother fvcker though. Just makes me sick at the things she told me only to run back to her ex so quickly.

I am hurting, but slowly getting over it. I miss her, but then I think about how disgusting her actions are and it puts a smile on my face to know I don't have to deal with that. Her boyfriend will be miserable with her.

 

[Lucifero]

Damn, this thread is awesome. You handled yourself amazingly considering the circumstances...once the pain and jealously subsides, and it will soon, you will be that much stronger.

Go do some pick-ups and get some other women and you'll get over this faster.

:yes:

Also, something that hasnt been said about much, you also did a GREAT job on that "Are you over me?" Question. "I don't know." was the PERFECT answer. Why? Because of its indirectness! You should NEVER answer womans question directly. "I don't know", "Maybe", "Maybe I'll tell you next year", "Perhaps", "I could be, but who knows?",etc are answers to that question...

Damn this is just epic, +1 rep for you.

Keep up the good work, hercules.

:cheer:

 

[Lucifero]

A+ well done!

You won't be in the shoes of thousands of other naive tards who were/are still kept on a string by some chick :cheer:

:rockon:

 

[Kailex]

Come this morning she rings me up very early to tell me she missed me and then to tell me about her night. I stop her mid sentence and say, "I am not interested in hearing about how much fun you had with your ex, call one of your girlfriends for that"

She was PISSED. She asked me if I was over her, I replied I don't know. She then started crying a little and calling me an *******. The phone call ended shortly after that.

A few hours later she calls me to tell me she is back with her ex, and that we can't hang out anymore. I just reply with "okay, later"

Did I mess up by calling her out on this and showing her it bothered me a little?

This is what women will do in order to "get back at you".

By showing her:

(1) You didn't want to hear about her party - It brought down her importance in your life. She wasn't ready to hear that or face that and all of a sudden you just brought her down a few notches.

(2) Since she didn't expect that reaction from you, she then went into Defense Mode. So she asked you if you were over her and NOT giving her a straight answer drove her even more insane. Had you said "Yes" or "No", you would have given her the satisfaction of a definite answer and then she could shift whatever blame to you. Had you said "Yes", she could move on with new guilt and call you an assshole and move on. Had you said "No", she would be prepared to string you along. "I don't know" denied her of either scenario. She didn't know how to deal with that.

(3) Defense Mode kicked into overdrive as she then begins crying and called you names. Crying is the woman's last line of defense before REVENGE. Crying is made to enable Sympathy Mode within a man. You didn't fall for it.

(4) Failed crying leads to Revenge or the female's vindictive stage. Since she has seen that she hasn't affected you at all (even if you are hurt from it), her last line is to try to show you how she isn't hurt anymore by your indifference. Thus, why she wanted to tell you that she is back with her ex. In her mind, she is right, you are wrong and she'll be happy with her ex.

We know differently.

The fact that she texted you about an assignment is evidence that she's hurt by your indifference to EVERYTHING.

Had you answered back her text or any text, she'd probably fluff and then cut you off. In her mind, YOU had the last word, and she'll try to maneuver herself into a position where SHE will have the last word for her mental sanity.



Terrible game these women play.
The best way to play it... is to not.

 

[Thundernuts]

This is what women will do in order to "get back at you".

By showing her:

(1) You didn't want to hear about her party - It brought down her importance in your life. She wasn't ready to hear that or face that and all of a sudden you just brought her down a few notches.

(2) Since she didn't expect that reaction from you, she then went into Defense Mode. So she asked you if you were over her and NOT giving her a straight answer drove her even more insane. Had you said "Yes" or "No", you would have given her the satisfaction of a definite answer and then she could shift whatever blame to you. Had you said "Yes", she could move on with new guilt and call you an assshole and move on. Had you said "No", she would be prepared to string you along. "I don't know" denied her of either scenario. She didn't know how to deal with that.

(3) Defense Mode kicked into overdrive as she then begins crying and called you names. Crying is the woman's last line of defense before REVENGE. Crying is made to enable Sympathy Mode within a man. You didn't fall for it.

(4) Failed crying leads to Revenge or the female's vindictive stage. Since she has seen that she hasn't affected you at all (even if you are hurt from it), her last line is to try to show you how she isn't hurt anymore by your indifference. Thus, why she wanted to tell you that she is back with her ex. In her mind, she is right, you are wrong and she'll be happy with her ex.

We know differently.

The fact that she texted you about an assignment is evidence that she's hurt by your indifference to EVERYTHING.

Had you answered back her text or any text, she'd probably fluff and then cut you off. In her mind, YOU had the last word, and she'll try to maneuver herself into a position where SHE will have the last word for her mental sanity.



Terrible game these women play.
The best way to play it... is to not.

Must say im extremely impressed with how FeelsGoodBro handled this entire situation, damn near perfect. Even when he texted her for closure he still got to play with her head just a bit more.

and she said " Never say goodbye to me" god damn...

Kailex you got those rules down man, i was reading through this thread and thinking of all those things you beat me to it.

Feelsgoodbro, you had me clapping by the end or your original post, way to go man, never let them play, her actions showed you what she really is. If i had a girlfriend that wouldn't invite me to her party because her ex was gonna be there i would have walked.

The force is strong in this one...:yes:

 

[Lucifero]

I walk away from this with my first notch on my belt and some decent sex experience.

I've deleted her number and only have to see her in class a few more weeks. I do have two other plates at the moment now too which will definitely help.

The first of many, i reckon.

(3) Defense Mode kicked into overdrive as she then begins crying and called you names. Crying is the woman's last line of defense before REVENGE.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1Y73sPHKxw&feature=related

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

This girl is a trip man. It's becoming surreal.

The other day, after I had ignored a few texts, she starts calling me around 10pm. I ignore the first two times. Decided to pick up the 3rd time, I don't know why.

I answer the phone, she says:

"Ryan! Please just give me two minutes to talk!"

I tell her to make it fast.

In a rather emotional voice (if this is an act, I swear to god, this girl should consider acting as a profession) she starts telling me she doesn't date guys she cares about. How she is a horrible person and has been pushing me away the entire time, because she cares for me. How the reason she called me to tell me she was back with her ex, was because her boyfriend told her to.

After that rather emotional junk, I drop this gem: "Is that all?"

She then says some garbage about needing to hear my voice. I basically told her I am glad it worked out this way, because I wasn't going to compete for her attention. I told her she made the decision to be with her ex, live with it. How I did care for her, but it doesn't even matter anymore. And then I told her in a very ****y voice that her boyfriend will never look as good as me. She replied by saying she doubted her relationship was going to last long. And then just to end the awkwardness I just made her laugh by making a joke and told her I had to go. Oh and somewhere in the middle of this she said she had to be apart of my life somehow. I told her I had enough buddies and that I couldn't be her friend.

As soon as I hang up the phone, 45 seconds later, she texts me:

"I love absolutely everythign about you. It's crazy. You are the one that is perfect. It scares me."

I replied telling her she made no sense and I would see her in class.

She has texted me as soon as she woke up the past two days saying she had dreams about me. I haven't replied to either.

This is fvcking disgusting.

 

[Kenny Powers]

As soon as I hang up the phone, 45 seconds later, she texts me:

"I love absolutely everythign about you. It's crazy. You are the one that is perfect. It scares me."

I replied telling her she made no sense and I would see her in class.

She has texted me as soon as she woke up the past two days saying she had dreams about me. I haven't replied to either.

This is fvcking disgusting.

I wish there was an emoticon for jizzing in your pants. Dude you are my hero!!!!! I'm switching to whatever religion worships you! Hahaha you are totally in control now and have turned the tables on her and she is freaking the fvck out.

Its totally your call what to do with this girl: date her, ONS, friends with benefits, no contact (but that's no fun when you pretty much own her at this point), or keep messing with her.

Just keep two things in mind.
1. Stay in control and don't let her pull you in again.
2. She was a biitch to you and is now completely fvcking over this poor other guy who she is only dating to make you jealous. Never feel bad for her! She is messed up and will only hurt you again if given the chance.

Stay in control! Just keep doing what your doing.

 

[Jariel]

I've really enjoyed reading this thread! Finally, someone who gets it and a great example to all newcomers to this site.

Basically, you have turned a rejection around and she's now in the palm of your hand. You gave her a taste of what it's like to be with you, you gave her attention and made her feel good, then you withdrew it. It's almost guaranteed to send chicks crazy for you.

What you have to decide now is whether you want to be with her. If so, then now is probably a good time. BUT don't get emotionally involved, don't offer any commitment and absolutely do not talk feelings with her or reveal anything that will feed her ego.

You know how her mind works now, so use it to your advantage. Ask her to meet up with you then make a move, escalate to sex, then withdraw again.

I went through this same thing recently with the girl I'm seeing and the key factors are patience and discipline.

Keep it up mate and keep us updated!

 

[bukowski_merit]

In a rather emotional voice (if this is an act, I swear to god, this girl should consider acting as a profession) she starts telling me she doesn't date guys she cares about. How she is a horrible person and has been pushing me away the entire time, because she cares for me. How the reason she called me to tell me she was back with her ex, was because her boyfriend told her to.

This is quite normal for women caught between two men, rebounding, and/or cheating. The emotions she's feeling are real emotions; but they're a product of your strength and attitude. If you had fallen in line and done what typical men do, "Please baby, i want you back too!" She would have gotten bored with that a long time ago! But you are presenting a challenge. She feels you have gone cold to her, and she remembers NOW how you made her feel before you went cold. There's no doubt in my mind that you shared some pretty powerful moments with this woman; otherwise she wouldn't be acting in this emotional way.

Take your attention away from a woman who didn't feel you had a connection and she doesn't care.

Take your attention away from a woman who did feel you had a connection and she does care.

Im not saying you should take her back; im simply stating why this is happening. It will not happen with every woman you next; but when it does - you gain about 90% of the power if you so choose to indulge her again!

After that rather emotional junk, I drop this gem: "Is that all?"

Can you give some insight as to what you want to happen with this woman? Just want her to go away? Want her to leave her bf and come back to you? Want her to cheat on her bf with you?

She then says some garbage about needing to hear my voice.

CLASSIC! I've had women call me KNOWING i wasn't going to answer, and then text me: "I just called to hear your voicemail; now that i've heard your voice i feel better. TTYL..." What they're really saying is: "Look, im being a little cute puppy dog. Come play with me and pet me, so that i can bite your balls off!"

But again, this is a sign this woman's interest level in you is skyrocketing and she's panicking.

I basically told her I am glad it worked out this way, because I wasn't going to compete for her attention. I told her she made the decision to be with her ex, live with it. How I did care for her, but it doesn't even matter anymore. And then I told her in a very ****y voice that her boyfriend will never look as good as me.

All this was unnecessary. You're sub-communicating here that you're hurt and have feelings for her. What she hears: "I'm pissed off!"

She replied by saying she doubted her relationship was going to last long.

translation: "I'm justifying my lust for you by making my relationship appear to be meaningless. I'm open to cheating on him and/or leaving him if you lead me into it."

Well? What do you want?

Oh and somewhere in the middle of this she said she had to be apart of my life somehow.

I believe what she wants (in my very experienced in this opinion) is to cheat on her boyfriend with you. I believe all you'll have to do is tell her to come over some night, and it would really be that easy.

Again, what do you want? Forget people telling you what you should want right now. I'm asking you to reveal what YOU want.

"I love absolutely everythign about you. It's crazy. You are the one that is perfect. It scares me."

Translation: "I'm falling deeper in love with you because you won't let me own your balls. I'm scared that my ability to seduce men is decaying."

She has texted me as soon as she woke up the past two days saying she had dreams about me. I haven't replied to either.

This woman's interest level is bursting out of the seams! She's looking for some kind of leadership from you too. That's why it's important to know what you want here.

This is fvcking disgusting.

Are you saying that because you think about her all the time and are hurt that she left you? Or are you saying that because she has a boyfriend and is showing signs of being in love with you? Or are you saying that for another reason?

 

[Levex]

haha, thread was a good read, good job.

 

[FeelsGoodBro]

Can you give some insight as to what you want to happen with this woman? Just want her to go away? Want her to leave her bf and come back to you? Want her to cheat on her bf with you?

Honestly, I am more confused everyday. I am attracted to her physically to the point I can’t help myself when I am with her. I can’t even describe it. You should see how this girl looks at me, it’s almost sad, like I am God or something. I remember a few weeks ago we went out to a club and she is just staring at me shaking her head. I just look at her and ask her, “what?” she tells me “You are gorgeous. You know I want to be with you, right?” Another recent time we screwed, we met for a drink, she was with a male friend who I’ve met a few times, I have a drink and tell her I am leaving. As soon as I get to my car, she is texting me how good I was looking, she wants me to sleepover, not because she wants to fvck me, but because she misses me.

However, I do know I don’t have the energy for the mind games / bull**** in-between the times we do not go out.

But again, this is a sign this woman's interest level in you is skyrocketing and she's panicking.

We only have like 5 classes left together, I remember on the phone I said “It doesn’t really matter, we have a few more classes left together.”

She got emotional again and said “stop it!”

This girl will 100% cry on the last day. I plan on finishing my final very quickly and getting the fk out.

translation: "I'm justifying my lust for you by making my relationship appear to be meaningless. I'm open to cheating on him and/or leaving him if you lead me into it."

Well? What do you want?

She will not leave him for me right now. I know this for a fact. I believe she mentioned after this relationship she said she was going to be single for a long time. That is why I am so confused.

I believe what she wants (in my very experienced in this opinion) is to cheat on her boyfriend with you. I believe all you'll have to do is tell her to come over some night, and it would really be that easy.

Again, what do you want? Forget people telling you what you should want right now. I'm asking you to reveal what YOU want.

Maybe she would. But, she would only run back to her boyfriend the next day and try to sucker me in longer. The sex is great, but not at the cost of my sanity.

Translation: "I'm falling deeper in love with you because you won't let me own your balls. I'm scared that my ability to seduce men is decaying."

The sick part is I am starting to believe she is in love with me.

This woman's interest level is bursting out of the seams! She's looking for some kind of leadership from you too. That's why it's important to know what you want here.

She won’t leave her boyfriend for me. She has been with him a year & a half and has said she just can’t dump him and jump to the next guy.

Are you saying that because you think about her all the time and are hurt that she left you? Or are you saying that because she has a boyfriend and is showing signs of being in love with you? Or are you saying that for another reason?

I am saying it because this is like a sick form of torture. I can’t cut off all contact with her, we still have class together. And she keeps texting me **** like that. I tell myself I am over it when I am out of class and then I see her and I can’t help but feel a bit hurt.

 

[Lucifero]

This girl is a trip man. It's becoming surreal.

The other day, after I had ignored a few texts, she starts calling me around 10pm. I ignore the first two times. Decided to pick up the 3rd time, I don't know why.

I answer the phone, she says:

"Ryan! Please just give me two minutes to talk!"

I tell her to make it fast.

In a rather emotional voice (if this is an act, I swear to god, this girl should consider acting as a profession) she starts telling me she doesn't date guys she cares about. How she is a horrible person and has been pushing me away the entire time, because she cares for me. How the reason she called me to tell me she was back with her ex, was because her boyfriend told her to.

After that rather emotional junk, I drop this gem: "Is that all?"

She then says some garbage about needing to hear my voice. I basically told her I am glad it worked out this way, because I wasn't going to compete for her attention. I told her she made the decision to be with her ex, live with it. How I did care for her, but it doesn't even matter anymore. And then I told her in a very ****y voice that her boyfriend will never look as good as me. She replied by saying she doubted her relationship was going to last long. And then just to end the awkwardness I just made her laugh by making a joke and told her I had to go. Oh and somewhere in the middle of this she said she had to be apart of my life somehow. I told her I had enough buddies and that I couldn't be her friend.

As soon as I hang up the phone, 45 seconds later, she texts me:

"I love absolutely everythign about you. It's crazy. You are the one that is perfect. It scares me."

I replied telling her she made no sense and I would see her in class.

She has texted me as soon as she woke up the past two days saying she had dreams about me. I haven't replied to either.

This is fvcking disgusting.

I believe we have a Stage 5 Clinger here, you'd better batton down the hatches because if you keep rejecting her (and you should) she might do something drastic...

 

[CantTouchMyStyle]

I believe we have a Stage 5 Clinger here, you'd better batton down the hatches because if you keep rejecting her (and you should) she might do something drastic...

Imagine what is going to happen when he tells her he is with someone else.

:yes: :woo: :box: