Called her out on her BS.. Did I screw up?

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perseverance

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You've gone from handling the situation very well to becoming an immature moron.

Was the last exchange necessary at all? Not really, it was just you shooting your venom because I reckon you're still angry about what happened with this girl because you grew attached to her because she took your virginity and then ditched you for her ex. This is where this whole thing should have ended, but no you've dragged it out to the end of the semester. Why?

I don't really think that this girl did anything wrong to you, she did you no personal wrong and you're punishing her because she hurt you. You rejected her once, that should have been more than enough. All you've done here is drag her emotions through the dirt in revenge.

When a woman hurts you, cut them off and don't even acknowledge their presence, it is much better for you, because you aren't giving her the attention or the closure that she wants. You have given her an abundance of both in the last exchange.

You came off as a bitter, angry and frustrated man in this latest exchange. Your posts have made some fine entertainment and you have shown you are not someone who lacks a backbone, but you have to know the right time to switch it off and move on.

This whole thing has gone on for nearly three weeks, three weeks far too long.
 

terran2k

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eh fvck it, I think you did just fine, you had some **** to get off your chest, and you did.
 

falconslax89

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f283000 said:
The only one that's getting his head messed up is you! Are you this naive?

This girl is playing games with you. You say you're in her head yet she tells you she can't hang out with you anymore and that she want right back to her ex. You really are naive to not see what's going on.

She's stringing you along and has you right where she wants you.

If a girl tells you she misses you and wants to be with you yet she is f**** another guy who she claims "she can't stand" that's classic women mind games. You can do a search in the forums and find out just how much women use this tactic on naive guys that don't know what's going on.

The whole purpose of this tactic is to string you a long and make you her ego booster. Women can be players too and nothing inflates their ego more knowing they are wanted by a guy and keep one stringing along.

What you need to do is to delete her from your life.
couldnt be more true. i had a similar experience and posted about it here..
remain indifferent and if you do have any further interactions with her keep it sexual...it will **** with her emotions and make her want you more anyway...
thats what i did in my situation. she ended up coming back to me months later and we dated for awhile but such a set up will never worked as there is mistrust from the beginning, which i was told here, and then found out first hand.
stay indifferent. **** her if you want. show no feelings. this will put you in charge and keep you from getting hurt...
after awhile she could prove herself to you, probably not though...so until then follow this formula and you should end up ay ok..
 

Kenny Powers

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perseverance said:
You've gone from handling the situation very well to becoming an immature moron.

Was the last exchange necessary at all? Not really, it was just you shooting your venom because I reckon you're still angry about what happened with this girl because you grew attached to her because she took your virginity and then ditched you for her ex. This is where this whole thing should have ended, but no you've dragged it out to the end of the semester. Why?

I don't really think that this girl did anything wrong to you, she did you no personal wrong and you're punishing her because she hurt you. You rejected her once, that should have been more than enough. All you've done here is drag her emotions through the dirt in revenge.

When a woman hurts you, cut them off and don't even acknowledge their presence, it is much better for you, because you aren't giving her the attention or the closure that she wants. You have given her an abundance of both in the last exchange.

You came off as a bitter, angry and frustrated man in this latest exchange. Your posts have made some fine entertainment and you have shown you are not someone who lacks a backbone, but you have to know the right time to switch it off and move on.

This whole thing has gone on for nearly three weeks, three weeks far too long.
Have you been taking crazy pills :crazy:

Dude the girl kept contacting and approaching him. Just ignoring her would have been bitter. She was the one who dragged it out. Besides cut him a break he lost his virginity to her and still had feelings for her.

She was leading him on hard core earlier and then when he manned up and stopped being interested in her she freaked out and started dating her ex again the next day. This girl is messed up and would have just ended up hurting him again. He played it perfectly!

What else was he supposed to say during their last exchange. He was polite but serious and let her know it was over. However, he also let her know why he didn't want to be with her and that she shouldn't have played with him like that.

I love how you say he should have been nicer but then recommend NC. I'm sure 99% of girls would consider what he did nicer than NC.
 
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perseverance

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Kenny Powers said:
Have you been taking crazy pills :crazy:

Dude the girl kept contacting and approaching him. Just ignoring her would have been bitter. She was the one who dragged it out. Besides cut him a break he lost his virginity to her and still had feelings for her.

She was leading him on hard core earlier and then when he manned up and stopped being interested in her she freaked out and started dating her ex again the next day. This girl is messed up and would have just ended up hurting him again. He played it perfectly!

What else was he supposed to say during their last exchange. He was polite but serious and let her know it was over. However, he also let her know why he didn't want to be with her and that she shouldn't have played with him like that.

I love how you say he should have been nicer but then recommend NC. I'm sure 99% of girls would consider what he did nicer than NC.
He owed her nothing and gave her everything.

She didn't deserve the rejection or the closure or any reason for his decision.

He could have ended this situation when she got with her ex boyfriend by just cutting her off.

Instead he chose to unleash his venom, reveal his emotions and wore his heart on his sleeve. If he had been in a long term relationship with this woman I would have understood his decision.

He dragged this out for nearly three weeks, why? There was no need too. What's done is done, next time he needs to think like a Spartan and not like Gerard Way from My Chemical Romance.
 

Jariel

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She messed with his head, played with his emotions and it backfired on her. She got what she deserved in my opinion and the OP came out on top, learning a valuable lesson.

Girls need to learn that their head games are unnacceptable. You only have to look around this forum to see how many guys have been hurt by this kind of behaviour, many of who sink into depression. I have no sympathy for her and full respect for the OP.
 

PokerStar

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sometimes it feels good to release some venom. just to flex the power without holding anything back feels awesome.
 
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perseverance

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Lucifero, if a woman I was "seeing" did the same thing that happened to the OP to me I would have immediately cut her off. I would delete her number, deletedher facebook. I would then refuse to acknowledge her in lessons.

I've learnt that women crave attention and love drama, why would I be foolish enough to give them both to teach them a lesson? If men want to waste their time teaching a woman a thing about respect, by all means be my guest.

I was brought up to give everyone I meet the basic respect, basic courtesy and to offer basic manners. If these qualities aren't in a woman aged 20, 30 or 40 then they never will be as far as I'm concerned and they're a product of shabby parenthood. Not my problem. Next, please?!

Pokestar, I would have unleashed my venom against a punch bag or on a treadmill or rowing machine. I find when a woman has angered me or when anything has angered me, a good hard, two hour work out in the gym makes me feel more relaxed, more composed and clears my head. It calms me down and I feel much better after a nice warm shower and a cup of tea.

Never allow a woman to make you lose control of yourself, they thrive it on and I've learnt not to allow their actions to control your emotions or your actions.

He stood up to her, yes, he gave her a dressing down, yes, but ultimately he showed his hand to her and that's it. He showed her he was angry and bitter and when it would have been wiser to just erase her from memory.
 

Jariel

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Perseverance: But the big difference is, he could now bang this chick if he wanted.

Also, I wouldn't underestimate the effect this will have on his confidence. If he'd cut her off when she hurt him, he'll remember this experience as one where he was rejected, where he didn't feel good enough and as a negative blow to his ego. Now, he can walk away from this feeling on top and feeling confident. Sometimes that actually means a lot.
 

CantTouchMyStyle

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Perseverance is a huge AFC.

He could not completely cut her off - he was stuck in class with her! He did CUT her off! He said he didn't reply to texts/calls! She didn't get the lesson and pushed the issue.

Yeah, I am taught respect, courtesy, etc.. Respect is earned not given. She deserves nothing for the way she acted. OP properly put her in place. She was playing head games and trying to keep him around for another time. He wasn't buying what she was selling and put his foot down. It's that simple.

He didn't even come off bitter. He was brutally honest with her. Her actions were a joke. And even if he did come off bitter - it doesn't matter. She realizes she fvcked up and now is crying herself to sleep and taking it on her boyfriend, who she cheated on. She has to look that poor schmuck in the face every day.
 
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perseverance

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Jariel said:
Perseverance: But the big difference is, he could now bang this chick if he wanted.

Also, I wouldn't underestimate the effect this will have on his confidence. If he'd cut her off when she hurt him, he'll remember this experience as one where he was rejected, where he didn't feel good enough and as a negative blow to his ego. Now, he can walk away from this feeling on top and feeling confident. Sometimes that actually means a lot.
Bang her? He banged her before and got attached.

We all get rejected, I've been rejected tonnes of times. You have to grow a thick skin to rejection in order to overcome it and the only way that happens is to get rejected. Rejection is part of the parcel of life, if you can't handle rejection, you'll have a hard knock life.

I hope he has walked away feeling confident and feeling on top. If this method works for him, then fantastic, but it is not how I would have handled it.
 
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perseverance

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CantTouchMyStyle said:
Perseverance is a huge AFC.

He could not completely cut her off - he was stuck in class with her! He did CUT her off! He said he didn't reply to texts/calls! She didn't get the lesson and pushed the issue.

Yeah, I am taught respect, courtesy, etc.. Respect is earned not given. She deserves nothing for the way she acted. OP properly put her in place. She was playing head games and trying to keep him around for another time. He wasn't buying what she was selling and put his foot down. It's that simple.

He didn't even come off bitter. He was brutally honest with her. Her actions were a joke. And even if he did come off bitter - it doesn't matter. She realizes she fvcked up and now is crying herself to sleep and taking it on her boyfriend, who she cheated on. She has to look that poor schmuck in the face every day.
He could have ignored her in the lessons, what is it? Three weeks of silence between in class and he never sees her again.

You're right respect is earned, but I also have a basic level of respect for any human being until they either build on this foundation through their actions or destroy that foundation through their actions.

If you had read my previous replies, I did mention somewhere that she deserves nothing. Go back through my posts and re-read them. He could have put his foot down by ignoring her, at least that's what I would have done. Maybe it is because when I unleash venom I get very nasty, so choose to be a lot more tactful about how I handle situations? Who knows!

Who cares what she is doing? Seriously, I wouldn't have given her a second thought after she went back with her ex. He's wasted three weeks of his life "putting his foot down" when he could have been out approaching other girls.

So, if it is hugely AFC to move on with your life after a girl shows you her lack of worth then fair enough I'm a huge AFC, but somehow I don't think it is and I couldn't care less what you think.

As I said earlier, if you want to "put your foot down with women" who aren't worthy of your time then be my guest, I've got more important things to do with my time.
 
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perseverance

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PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
The OP did it perfectly. Many women would perceive no-contact out of nowhere as insecure, childish, and a SIGN that she got to you, although it has the seemingly mutually exclusive effect of re-igniting attraction. This is why I don't do it, I just back off and remain in the friendzone while using the girl for social proof when I am over her. In this case, he doesnt care about that, nor should he. Also, he managed to confront her in a way that did not make him seem hurt or insecure. IF you are unable to do this, then no contact like perseverance says is a good alternative.
Women like this woman can perceive what they like, I couldn't care less. They're not worth the hassle, or the effort. They certainly aren't worth three weeks of your life neither.

You back off into the friendzone? Why? You are just giving her false impressions that you're a friend when you aren't. I fail to see how that benefits you in anyway? At least when I go No Contact, I am walking away for good, I won't come back. Her loss, my gain, I escaped from a low value woman. :p
 
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perseverance

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PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
IMO being civil and "friends" shows more indifference than no contact. No contact is for when you are not able to get over this person.
You raise a fair point, but I'd just rather not associate myself with low quality people. I'm a bit snobby like that, you won't see me associate myself with the village tart for instance. I have no interest in contracting gonorrhea. I also think no contact is an effective method and I enjoy using it.

Isn't the old saying "out of sight, out of mind", I wonder in the three weeks the OP wasted on this girl whether or not he 'truly' got over her? Or will he truly move on now, he's probably never going to see her again?
 

FeelsGoodBro

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Slept with her last night. :eek: :eek:

I don't even know how it happened.

I went out to a local bar with some friends. She randomly shows up with a few of her friends. Starts talking to me and after I had probably 3 too many offers to share a cab. I say okay. She looked much better than usual. She gets dropped off first and tells me to come inside.

She's been single for a few weeks now supposedly. Good lord.

:eek: :confused:
 

Jariel

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FeelsGoodBro said:
Slept with her last night. :eek: :eek:

I don't even know how it happened.

I went out to a local bar with some friends. She randomly shows up with a few of her friends. Starts talking to me and after I had probably 3 too many offers to share a cab. I say okay. She looked much better than usual. She gets dropped off first and tells me to come inside.

She's been single for a few weeks now supposedly. Good lord.

:eek: :confused:
That's cool bro. Just look how you turned it all around! :up:

Now the challenge is not falling for her or letting her mess with your head again, BUT you know exactly how to handle this situation now so enjoy the ride and welcome to the DJ club. ;)
 
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perseverance

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FeelsGoodBro said:
Slept with her last night. :eek: :eek:

I don't even know how it happened.

I went out to a local bar with some friends. She randomly shows up with a few of her friends. Starts talking to me and after I had probably 3 too many offers to share a cab. I say okay. She looked much better than usual. She gets dropped off first and tells me to come inside.

She's been single for a few weeks now supposedly. Good lord.

:eek: :confused:
The wasp flies into the Black Widows web.

You reaction here says it all.

Those emotions are just flooding back aren't they?

Watch your back mate, I can see that Black Widow foaming at the mouth, she's got you by the jugular and she will try and make you submit to her by any means necessary, sex is just one of many methods. Once she has you, she'll drag you to the centre of her web and she'll bleed you dry and discard you.
 
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